WWE WrestleMania 29 Thoughts and Recap: Inside The Wheelhouse

April 11, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This past Sunday I was able to live out most every wrestling fan’s dream by attending my very 1st WrestleMania at MetLife Stadium. The atmosphere & excitement was like no other and I highly recommend it to any wrestling fan that is or has contemplating going to the “Super Bowl of Wrestling.” With that said I thought I’d figure to give some my thoughts on the 29th installment of WrestleMania:

– The Miz def. Wade Barrett

Not a bad opener to start off WrestleMania and I completely understand the time constraints of it being on the pre-show. Therefore it wasn’t as good as some of their recent RAW matches but it got the crowd on the right foot with a Miz victory. It’s nice to see two stars with a ton of potential, be pushed up and down the hierarchy of the WWE only to make their climb back to the top.

– The Shield def. Sheamus, Randy Orton & The Big Show

The Shield was very over with the NY/NJ crowd which came as a surprise to no one. Ambrose, Rollins and Reigns continue to grow on WWE television and I really hope are given the ball to run with now that ‘Mania is in the books. If the stars align correctly this trio could one of the best groups/stables from this current decade.

As for the “superfriends” trio of Sheamus, Orton and Big Show, I got to admit I was pretty surprised they went back to (or stayed with) The Big Show heel turn. All three stars really have looked weak throughout this whole thing and I am intrigued with how WWE handles these stars heading into Extreme Rules. Currently they don’t reflect the top star “mantra” that they should be receiving in my opinion.

– Mark Henry def. Ryback

This was your typical “brut” match. I thought both stars did a lot with what they had and made it work for the most part. I’m not a fan of these type of matches but Ryback and Henry proved that they are much more athletic then the normal “brut” matches we have been accustomed to.

– Team Hell No def. Ziggler & Langston

I wasn’t a fan of the buildup for this match because while the WWE Tag Team division was a bright spot for the WWE in 2012, a tandem of Ziggler and Langston never materialized as an actual tag team until weeks before WrestleMania. Having Ziggler and Bryan in the ring against one another during WrestleMania was enough for me and I thought the match was good as well. I think had the WWE given more focus to these four superstars we could’ve gotten a lot more emotional attachment to this match from a fan’s perspective.

– Fandango def. Chris Jericho

I was in the majority when I felt this match could ultimately steal the show from an undercard’s perspective and frankly it did not. The finish was sloppy but it was made up for as both stars are heavily over with the WWE fans. Fandango is going to be a major player in the WWE and Chris Jericho continues to prove why he is one of the best in the business as he continues to help build for wrestling’s future.

While the first match didn’t “blow our socks off” like we thought, I do look forward to seeing an eventual rematch on a smaller stage then WrestleMania. I still have high hopes for this feud and the potential it has.

– Alberto Del Rio def. Jack Swagger

The Del Rio/Swagger feud fell way below expectations and rightfully so. If you go back 12 weeks ago one of these stars was a heel and the other wasn’t even on WWE television. Fast forward to post-Elimination Chamber and one of them is being pushed as a major face (Del Rio) while the other is being pushed as a #1 contender to the World Heavyweight Championship despite just being back on television (Swagger).

It’s to work a World Heavyweight Championship match like that with those things restricting them from connecting to the audience and it doesn’t help it was for a WrestleMania. Like many matches on the card I feel like if it was given more room to grow and be built the fans would’ve accepted it more. It had a ton of potential but overall I feel like it fell flat out of most, if not all, the WrestleMania matches on the card.

– The Undertaker def. CM Punk

This was the best match from the event hands down. Despite everyone “knowing” what will happen the fans are completely invested with every near fall, reversal or regular move when The Undertaker is performing at WrestleMania. It helps when “The Deadman” is quite possibly facing the first person since Randy Orton at WrestleMania 21 to really give people hope that “the streak” could end.

Huge props to both stars for putting on a show under the type of injuries they had. It was a great story told in the ring and I look forward to watching it again once the show comes out onto DVD.

– Triple H def. Brock Lesnar

Other then Undertaker/CM Punk I felt like this match told a great story inside the ring that led to a compelling finish to the match. Both guys really beat the hell out of one another to give the fans a solid match and that’s exactly what they got. Despite Lesnar losing 2 out of his first 3 matches back in the WWE I still feel like he is as strong as when he debuted.

The Triple H/Lesnar feud in my opinion was highly underrated as well and gave fans one of the better buildups heading into MetLife Stadium. I’d be perfectly fine if the WWE wanted to move forward with some sort of “rubber match” between these two at another Summerslam to really end this thing on the right note and unfortunately for Triple H the right note is by getting Lesnar over again as a monster heel. Once again, great job by both guys at WrestleMania.

– John Cena def. The Rock

Sadly the majority of fans could careless about this match and that’s unfortunate for all the hype it received two years ago as being one of those last “mega-matches” in professional wrestling. The match started off slow but I felt really picked up towards the end and had a lot better flow then their WrestleMania 28 match in Miami. While I would’ve preferred to see some sort of heel turn from John Cena (because who doesn’t at this point) or some sort of finish that left us talking, the WWE decided to let all the talking be done in the ring.

The silver lining in this all is that there are questions surrounding both of these wrestlers in regards to what’s next for both of them. Will The Rock ever wrestle again especially after the injury he suffered? Who will be able to feud with John Cena heading into the summer? Can Ryback be that guy?

Overall I was very impressed with the show as a whole and felt it was really solid. Undertaker/CM Punk went beyond expectations and everything else didn’t make me desire anything more but left me pleasantly pleased with the performances. WWE does a hell of a job with their live shows and I felt WrestleMania lived up to all that they deem it to be.

When it’s all said and done I felt like WrestleMania 29 was a 4-out-of-5 show from my standpoint. Very solid show from top to bottom that will probably be one of, if not the best, WWE pay-per-views of the year.

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WWE WrestleMania 29 Results: Cena Wins, Brock Loses

April 07, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

It was the old WWE regime that ruled WrestleMania 29. The Rock returned and electrified the crowd, Triple H and Brock Lesnar had an intense fight, but it was  The Undertaker with CM Punk that stole the show in one of the most star studded WrestleMania pay per views ever.

You didn’t buy the WrestleMania 2013 edition expecting surprise  winners. We all knew how it was going to turn out. You watched it expecting to see the most exciting WrestleMania of all-time. While it may not go down as the best ever, it was certainly one of the most memorable top to bottom from the modern era. In regards to the overall show you won’t find much better.

John Cena pinned The Rock to win the WWE championship. The crowd was much more into this match in the open than anything else on the show. It definitely had a main-event vibe to it. Like last year though I found the zest to wear off pretty quickly. It was almost as if the crowd was waiting for something big to happen, yet they kept a pretty lethargic pace. They finally opened up with a bunch of moves after a few minutes with Cena eventually winding up in a Sharpshooter. The crowd hated Cena, booing him every time he went on the offense. The Rock got a great reaction from a spinebuster. Cena kicked out of a People’s Elbow and Rock Bottom. Cena reversed a People’s Elbow attempt into an AA for a close fall. Cena hit a Rock Bottom for another close fall. They played a lot off of last year’s match. Rock countered a sequence where he Cena suckered him with a People’s Elbow attempt into an AA attempt which was countered with a Rock Bottom for a close fall. They both kept going for the AA and Rock Bottom. Cena hit the AA out of a Rock Bottom to pin Rock and win his 11th WWE championship. I’d definitely call this match better than their last one but at the same time it was nothing special in my opinion. Rock shook Cena’s hand and hugged him after the match to a crowd full of boos. That wasn’t what these people wanted to see.

Triple H as expected defeated Brock Lesnar in a No Holds Barred Match. The match immediately broke into a brawl. They spent the early part of the match outside of the ring. Brock hit a suplex on the floor. Brock even wound up with a mouse under his eye. Brock suplexed Hunter through a table like it was nothing. Brock and Hunter had a real tough time getting the crowd back following Undertaker and Punk. Lesnar dominated the mid part of the match. Lesnar knocked Shawn Michaels off the apron with an elbow at one point. Michaels came back at him and took an F5. Brock kicked out of a Pedigree right after. Hunter brought the sledgehammer in the ring. Lesnar F5’d him and Hunter kicked out. Lesnar had a bloody lip at this point. Brock looked jacked by the way. The match had a similar psychology to The Undertaker vs. Triple H matches with Brock playing the part of Trips. Triple H finally regained the advantage and slammed a chair into Lesnar’s arm twice. Triple H got the kimura. Heyman tried to interfere but got kicked by Michaels. Brock finally powered his way out but wound up taking a DDT into the steel steps. Hunter nailed Brock in the head with the sledgehammer. Trips followed up with a Pedigree onto the steps for the three count. I have to admit that I was a bit surprised here. All of the rumors indicate that next year’s main-event is scheduled to be Brock vs. The Rock. Why put down the guy scheduled to headline next year’s Mania to a part-time guy? The match was good but they were really handicapped by following Undertaker-Punk.

The Undertaker retained The Streak going 21-0 defeating CM Punk. The Undertaker looked better than I expected here. The crowd came alive for this match more than any other at this point. One thing that dawned on me during the match is that the WWE let a golden opportunity slip here. Cena and Rock didn’t need the title. If Punk held on to the title they could have promoted streak vs. streak and the match would have been absolutely huge! Maybe I need to bid on that auction to submit my idea to Stephanie McMahon…or maybe not? Great match, much better than I expected. The big spot here was Punk nailing The Undertaker with an elbow off of the top to Taker who was laying on a table outside of the ring. They had a ton of close falls towards the end, building to the usual high drama of The Undertaker’s WrestleMania matches. The Undertaker reversed a GTS into a Tombstone for the pin. I wouldn’t put this up there with the Shawn Michaels-Undertaker matches, but it was certainly up there with the Triple H matches. It was different but just as good if not better. For a guy that was just hobbling up and down the ramp on Monday night, The Undertaker looked real good and Punk was an all-star here.

Alberto Del Rio defeated Jack Swagger to retain the WWE world heavyweight title. Swagger tapped out to the cross armbreaker. This was probably what you expected. I can’t say a whole lot about it. They had a cool spot in the match where Swagger somehow rolled through an arm breaker to the Patriot Lock teasing a title change. I am guessing this program is over since Del Rio got the win clean. No Dolph Ziggler here. I give up predicting a Ziggler cash in. Logically why a man holding a Money in the Bank briefcase wouldn’t cash in at WrestleMania 29 makes no sense to me.

The Shield defeated The Big Show, Sheamus, and Randy Orton in a hot opener. Orton tug himself in when Sheamus went to tag Show. Orton cleaned house at that point.  Orton hit an RKO but was then speared by Roman Reigns and pinned by Dean Ambrose. The post-match saw Show lay out both Orton and Sheamus. It was a hot opener but The Big Show turning on Orton and Sheamus was way too predictable. I am not sure what the deal was with Orton but it appeared Orton was set up to turn. For a WrestleMania it was a decent opener. I’d like to see what they could have done with more time.

On a side note, last year I ordered the stream off of and told you how horrible it was. Out of convenience I was willing to give it another shot. Unfortunately for about five minutes the website either timed out or said stream unavailable. I wound up ordering off of FIOS. I received some tweets from people who said they ordered the online stream and couldn’t get it on Later I saw some say their stream didn’t come back until about the three hour mark. I cannot fathom for the life of me how a company who brags about social media and has as much money as the WWE can’t get these WrestleMania streams right. It really boggles my mind!

Mark Henry defeated Ryback. This reminded me of a lot of the strongman vs. strongman matches I watched in the 1980s like Tony Atlas vs. Jesse Ventura, Ivan Putski vs. Ken Patera where the guys work a slow pace and test each other with power moves, bear hugs, etc. Ryback eventually took Henry off of his feet with a clothesline for his big comeback. Ryback then got Henry up for Shellshock but Henry grabbed the ropes and Ryback collapsed with Henry on his back. Henry wound up rolling over and pinning him. Ryback wound up giving Henry a spinebuster and Shellshock after the match. This was kind of odd considering the guy was “knocked out.” So this tells me one of two things. Either the WWE has totally given up on Ryback or Ryback is turning heel and is en route to a big SummerSlam 2013 clash with John Cena. My hunch is that Ryback is turning heel but it’s just a guess. I wouldn’t call this a bad match but it wasn’t anything special either.

Team Hell No retained the WWE tag team titles over Big E and Dolph Ziggler. Daniel Bryan was red hot in the opening moments of this match. Bryan and Ziggler started off and the fans really seemed to come alive for these two. Fans also got into Big E and Kane going head to head early on. Kane was in for the majority of the match for Team Hell No. Ziggler was fantastic as usual in the match, bumping all over the place. Kane chokeslammed Ziggler, tagged into Bryan, Bryan came off with a diving headbutt off the top rope, and pinned Ziggler for the win. Bryan was by far the most over guy on the show at this point. Bryan and Kane didn’t tease any problems. This was a pretty good match but I am not really sure what the thought was of having Kane work most of the match instead of Bryan. As confused as I was on the WWE’s inability to operate streaming video properly, I am even more confused every time I watch Daniel Bryan as to why he is not pushed harder. Unfortunately these guys only got about six minutes.

On another side note I have to tell you that it got old fast seeing tweets crawling across my television for four hours. I can see throwing the tweets up on Monday Night RAW but when you are charging people $70 to watch WrestleMania, I think you need to limit the tweets or kill them altogether. Not sure what the end game was there. Did they expect you to turn the show off you paid $70 to watch and jump on Twitter? Could you imagine seeing streaming tweets during the Super Bowl across your television? It was ridiculous.

Fandango pinned Chris Jericho. This was a pretty damned good match, probably better than most expected.  I thought a real gutsy angle here would have been for Fandango to walk out telling the fans that Lillian got his name wrong. Talk about the height of arrogance giving up your WrestleMania match! He didn’t.  Jericho was on fire here and was a real one-man show early on, and dominating the match.  Jericho kicked out of Fandango’s top rope leg drop. JBL said Fandango winning would be the biggest upset in sports entertainment history. He needs to search on YouTube for David Sammartino vs. Ron Shaw. The finish saw Jericho tweak his knee going for the Lionsault and while going for the Walls of Jericho was cradled by Fandango. This finish probably came across better on television with the announcers explaining it.  I’ll say this about Chris Jericho. Instead of phoning it in he embraced the challenge and really upped his game here.

Overall I’d say that WrestleMania was pretty good. From top to bottom it was probably the most solid card they have had in a long time. There weren’t any bad matches and you didn’t have the show slowed down by any ridiculous celebrity matches. The Undertaker and Punk easily stole the show and while the others worked hard, these guys just had “it”. Nothing else came close to this one, although the opener was real good for the short amount of time they had. I’d certainly say the spectacle here was bigger than the event.

Unfortunately it was a very predictable show, one of the most predictable in recent memory. It seemed like the WWE were in cruise control going in and through the show, getting by on star power. There is nothing wrong with that but it just felt a little lazy to me. I’d say the biggest surprise to me was Lesnar losing, although everyone predicted it. Why put your money guy down like that? Rumor has it that the WWE are expected to rev up a bunch of new angles over the next two weeks and begin new storylines. Cena is going to need a challenger so I’d expect someone surprisingly to emerge there. Last year Brock Lesnar debuted the night after WrestleMania. I wouldn’t expect anything that shocking this year but stranger things have happened.

I’d give the show a recommendation if you were on the fence. You won’t find many better WrestleMania events from open to close. At the same time I can almost guarantee you that Extreme Rules will probably blow it away.

Full WWE WrestleMania 29 results…
John Cena pinned The Rock to regain the WWE championship
Triple H defeated Brock Lesnar in a No Holds Barred Match
The Undertaker defeated CM Punk
Alberto Del Rio defeated Jack Swagger via submission to retain the WWE WHC
Fandango defeated Chris Jericho
Team Hell No retained the WWE world tag team titles defeating Dolph Ziggler and Big E. Langston
Mark Henry defeated Ryback
The Shield defeated Randy Orton, Sheamus, and The Big Show
The Miz defeated Wade Barrett to win the WWE I-C title

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WWE WrestleMania 29 Predictions & Preview

April 05, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

It’s that time of year again for WWE. It is time for WWE to put on it’s biggest show of the year. Most wrestling fans have heard the show called “The Granddaddy of Them All.” The event’s been called “The Showcase of the Immortals.” For sports fans reading this blog, WWE is going to have their version of the Super Bowl, or the World Series, or the Breeder’s Cup, or whatever championship you would like to use as a metaphor.

To put it simply, the event I am describing is WWE’s Wrestlemania. The fist edition, Wrestlemania I, started in 1985 at the “World’s Most Famous Arena,” Madison Square Garden.

On April 7, 2013, in East Rutherford, New Jersey, at Met Life Stadium where the New York Giants and the New York Jets both play their home games, the 29th edition, Wrestlemania XXIX will be taking place. The milestone Wrestlemania 30, will take place in New Orleans, LA next year in 2014.

That being said, in just about all of the previous 28 editions of this PPV, there has been a lot of buildup and excitement. That is NOT the case for this year’s edition. I am just not feeling the large majority of the matches. Part of it is on the writers for not coming up with better material, and a lot of it , I put on Vince and Creative. Many of the matches are re-matches, and there is a lot of dependance on part timers to carry the show.

I mean, whomever is writing Cena’s promos should be fired. Cena should never be portrayed as an underdog, particularly against another baby face. I found a lot of the promos Cena cut insulting to my intelligence. Cena told Rock that he (Cena) “never won the big one (meaning the title) at Mania.” on Raw. Really, Cena? Who pray tell, beat John Layfield for the World Title at Wrestlemania 21, then? Oh, you did, Cena. Cena has retained titles at Manias, and even won it at Mania 25 over Edge (C) and the Big Show in a Triple Threat.

I mean, Cena doesn’t write the promos (I’m sure he signs off on them.), but whomever is feeding him the lines really needs to do research there.

The Rock-Cena match and the Lesnar-HHH match are examples of re-matches and use of part timers. I thought WWE would have new people at the top by now, and I thought Rock vs Cena was supposed to be “Once in a Lifetime” at WM28. HHH is corporate, and Lesnar has only limited dates.

I just have no interest in this PPV. Fortunately, I am going in with some friends, or I would be thinking long and hard before buying it.

Well, enough of my ranting about the buildup, I am going to give you a rundown of the card, and give my predictions on who I think wins. Enjoy.

Youtube Preview Show:

Intercontinental Championship: Wade Barrett (C) vs The Miz

How the mighty have fallen. Two years ago, The Miz was the WWE Champion, and was headlining Mania. Now, two years later, he is going for the Intercontinental Championship, but he is not even on the PPV, and neither is Barrett. This is sad.

The poor Intercontinental Championship was once a coveted stepping stone to the next level. Now, it is being treated like a joke. The feud between Barrett and Miz has been lackluster.

Prediction: Wade Barrett retains.

Mixed Gender Tag Team Match: Brodus Clay, Tensai, Cameron and Naomi vs. Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow and The Bella Twins

Now if any match should be on the preview show, it is this one. I would rather see the Intercontinental Championship defended on PPV than the goofy Bella Twins. I am guessing this match is going to be used after one of the more intense matches to calm the fans down, so to speak.

Prediction: Clay, Tensai, Cameron and Naomi win

One on One Match: Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

I am thinking this could be a sleeper match. Of course, Jericho can have a good match with just about anyone. I am interested to see if Fandango can perform. I am still baffled that Cesaro is not on the PPV, but this Fandango is.

Prediction: Fandango somehow dances his way to a win.

One on One Match: Ryback vs. Mark Henry

This will be my “bathroom break,” so to speak. I have no interest in this match. What are these guys going to do, just club each other, and try to slam each other? Boring.

Prediction: Ryback has to get a win somehow, so I will go with Ryback.

Six Man Tag Team Match: Sheamus, Big Show and Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins, Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns

This match should be a very entertaining and a very good match. This match is one of the two matches I am looking forward to watching. I am really enjoying the Shield, and I just love Dean Ambrose. I think he is the strongest performer of the three.

The big story is will Sheamus, Show and Orton be able to work together? That is the big question. I am suspecting that one of them, probably Randy Orton, will walk out on them during the match.

Prediction: The Shield prevail.

The Undertaker Puts his Streak on the Line: CM Punk vs. The Undertaker

The buildup to this match has been pretty lackluster. I really expected better. Now, I am aware that the family of the late Bill Moody (Paul Bearer) approved, and such. I get that. I watched all of Punk’s antics with the urn, and at first, I was OK.

I felt that Bearer got to be part of Mania one last time, and the family approved. When I saw what happened on the go home Raw show, I thought that was kind of tacky, and a little much.

In the past, even though Taker won, many of his opponents were built up as legitimate threats. Even when we all know HBK was going to end his career at Mania 26, the match was built up to where there was that possibility that HBK could end Taker’s streak. Here, I just did not get that feeling. Now that there is news that CM Punk is going to be taken off the road from house shows due to injuries, I just think that the result is not in doubt.

Prediction: Undertaker is 21-0.

No Holds Barred Match with Triple H’s Career on the Line: Brock Lesnar vs. Triple H

This is the other match that I am very interested in. Yes, I think I have made it clear in past blogs that I am a huge Edge mark. What I don’t think most of my readers know is that I am a huge mark for two other wrestlers. One is HBK. The other is Triple H. Obviously, I am pretty interested in the outcome of the match.

The match buildup has been pretty good, thanks to Triple H and Paul Heyman, Brock’s manager. If a young wrestler who is learning his/her craft wants to learn how to cut a promo, they should watch videos of Paul Heyman. There are others (Flair, Rock, etc.) that one can learn from, but Heyman is a master. Heyman really did a great job building up this feud.

The booking should be obvious, especially considering that Brock both HHH’s arm twice, broke his friend HBK’s (who’ll be in HHH’s corner at the PPV) arm, and manhandled Hunter’s father in law, Vince McMahon and put Vince in the hospital (storyline). However, I could just as well see HHH retiring and then headlining the HOF next year in New Orleans.

Prediction: Since WWE likes to have a happy ending in their main matches, I am going to go with HHH winning. Perhaps you will see a couple of the McMahons do a run in.

WWE Tag Team Championship Match: Dolph Ziggler and Big E Langston vs. Kane and Daniel Bryan (C)

This is another match that I don’t have a lot of interest in. There is the back story of Bryan and Ziggler both dating AJ. I am sure AJ will interfere somehow. I think it may be a good time to have Team Hell No drop the belts also. Of course, depending on the placement of matches and such, team Hell No may retain if Ziggler cashes in his MITB briefcase.

Prediction: Team Hell No retain.

World Heavyweight Championship Match: Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio (C)

What a mess of a feud this has been. Bad enough Jack Swagger has been saddled with a racist Tea Party style gimmick, but evidently Vince likes the gimmick so much, he didn’t have Swagger lose his push or suspended when Swagger got that DUI. Had that been Jeff Hardy or RVD, the punishment would have been extremely harsh.

You also have the problem with trying to get over Alberto Del Rio as a baby face to attract the Mexican audience. It is failing miserably. I don’t blame Del Rio as much as I blame the writers. I personally think WWE Creative does not know how to get a Mexican baby face over in 2013.

Prediction: Well, if Dolph Ziggler is going to cash that MITB Briefcase in any kind of a BIG moment, I would have it done here. I think Swagger wins after a nasty battle, and Ziggler cashes the MITB and becomes the new World Champ.

WWE Championship Match: John Cena vs. The Rock (C)

Now, I thought last year’s match at WM28 was “ONCE in a Lifetime.” They had a special on it and everything. I guess this makes this TWICE in a Lifetime? Last year’s match felt like a big fight feel. This felt like nothing. On the Raw go home show, after I heard Cena’s speech, I was hoping Edge would come out and give Cena ANOTHER “pep talk,” and walk out like he did before Cena fought Lesnar. However, it was not to be.

I think it is obvious who is winning. The audience’s reactions will be interesting for me. Which fans will cheer or boo the Rock, and who will cheer or boo Cena.

Prediction: John Cena will once again win the WWE Championship, and hold it forever and a day.

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WWE WrestleMania 29 Predictions: Inside The Wheelhouse

April 04, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

The 29th installment of WrestleMania is upon us as it will be live this Sunday from MetLife Stadium in New Jersey! Lets take a look at some of my preview and predictions for every match on this Sunday’s WrestleMania 29 card:

“Tons of Funk” (Brodus Clay, Tensai, & The Funkadactyls) vs. Team Rhodes Scholars (Damien Sandow & Cody Rhodes) and The Bella Twins (Nikki & Brie Bella):

I’m going to assume this will be on the pre-show of WrestleMania 29 but I could be wrong. Team Rhodes Scholars and The Bella Twins obviously have the most “upside” of the two combined teams but I believe the WWE wants to kick-off the show by making the fans happy, specifically the younger ones in attendance. With that said I think “Tons of Funk” will walk out of WrestleMania victorious and I would not be shocked if the WWE has bigger plans for this tag team heading into the Summer months.

Winners: Brodus Clay, Tensai and The Funkadactyls

Wade Barrett (c) vs. The Miz (For the WWE Intercontinental Championship):

I’ve been pretty happy with the way WWE has built up this match in recent weeks as it gives two good workers the opportunity to showcase their skills at WrestleMania. I feel like this could be one of those matches on the undercard that has fans talking as both stars will take the WrestleMania opportunity and use it to their benefit. In my opinion The Miz is back on the rise in the WWE and I foresee him capturing the Intercontinental Championship in a decent match.

Winners: The Miz

Chris Jericho vs. Fandango:

Similar to the Wade Barrett/Miz matchup, I would not be shocked if this steals the undercard of WrestleMania 29. This more then likely isn’t wrestling fans first pick for a Chris Jericho match at WrestleMania but from what we have seen in recent weeks Fandango has the chance to have the “it factor” that WWE looks for. The WWE would not be having a star make his singles debut (sorry Johnny Curtis) if he wasn’t going to win. Getting a victory over Chris Jericho in your debut match at WrestleMania could be one of the biggest “rubs” of all-time.

Winner: Fandango

Team Hell No (Kane & Daniel Bryan) (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler & Big E. Langston (For the WWE Tag Team Championship):

Two things make me excited about this match: the WWE Tag Team Championship is on the line and we are guaranteed Dolph Ziggler & Daniel Bryan in the ring, at the same time, at a WrestleMania. The build up has been mediocre at best in-regards to this match and that’s why I believe the excitement is down about this match. I believe all four Superstars will be able to change the fans opinion once this one concludes and I look for Dolph Ziggler & Big E. Langston getting the victory.

Winner: Dolph Ziggler & Big E. Langston

Ryback vs. Mark Henry:

This isn’t going to be a Savage/Steamboat, Hart/Michaels, Punk/Jericho type of match at all. This will be a muscle vs. muscle match that will showcase ones strength rather then in-ring ability. Ryback & Mark Henry have had a nice build up to this match and I think this will help catapult Ryback back into the main event picture now that WrestleMania season will be over. Be on the look out for Ryback lifting Mark Henry for a “shellshock” as well, could be one of the more impressive moments of the entire WrestleMania show.

Winner: Ryback

Sheamus, Randy Orton & The Big Show vs. The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns):

Similar to Ryback vs. Mark Henry, this has had a good buildup heading into WrestleMania 29. More importantly the WWE has done a good job make The Shield a force to be taken seriously heading into the future of its company. I expect all six superstars to give us a brawl but The Shield will be victorious on WrestleMania Sunday. As for the Randy Orton “heel turn” predictions currently taking place, I expect the “seeds to be planted” rather then a complete turn on the grandest stage, I still think Orton/Sheamus could be a top feud heading into the Summer.

Winner: The Shield

Brock Lesnar vs. Triple H (No Holds Barred match, if Triple H loses he must retire):

Lesnar vs. Triple H is going to be everything we expect it to be and that’s an extremely physical wrestling match. While it’s not the most entertaining stipulation to give (No Holds Barred is pretty plain actually), I expect both stars to take that stipulation and use it to their benefit. This will be the match that gets a lot of reaction out of the fans simply due to the physicality it will bring.

Look for Paul Heyman, Stephanie McMahon & Vince McMahon to be involved in this match somehow and I’ll go out on a limb to predict a Shane McMahon sighting as well. Triple H isn’t going to retire any time soon and I would be shocked if the WWE allows him to lose two straight versus Brock Lesnar. I like Triple H getting the win against Lesnar in a match that will leave it all on the line.

Winner: Triple H

Alberto Del Rio (c) vs. Jack Swagger (For the World Heavyweight Championship):

When this match was first announced after Elimination Chamber I was all for it because it made the most storyline sense. But I get the feeling that wrestling fans aren’t as excited as first expected and I think that’s due in-part to a recent face turn from Del Rio & a recent Main Event skyrocketed push for Jack Swagger. Should this feud continue I believe it will get fans more excited for their matches but it currently lacks any type of “WrestleMania excitement” that’s for sure.

Both stars are on the cusp of being major players as Del Rio is better served as a face and Swagger has the ability to be a great “throwback” heel with Zeb Coulter. The injury angle to Ricardo Rodriguez leads me to believe that Del Rio gets the victory at WrestleMania and that’s why I am going with the current World Heavyweight Champion to retain in a pretty good match.

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

The Undertaker vs. CM Punk:

In recent weeks we have been shown why The Undertaker and CM Punk are two of the best in the business. They have had limited time to help build their match but it has fans wanting more. Fans love The Undertaker’s WrestleMania streak and CM Punk is a legit superstar who can really contend giving “The Deadman” his first loss at the biggest wrestling stage.

Reason for that is because we all know that CM Punk isn’t only the future of the WWE but he is also its present. While a victory over The Undertaker could be just as big as his recent WWE Championship title reign I don’t foresee it happening because at this point The Undertaker should never lose at ‘Mania. Combine that belief to the passing of Paul Bearer and how the company has used the legendary manager in building this match & you have another reason why it makes sense for The Undertaker to extend his streak to 21-0.

Winner: The Undertaker

The Rock (c) vs. John Cena (For the WWE Championship):

Unfortunately the buildup for this match hasn’t been anything special due in-part to that two week lag where The Rock was promoting his most recent movie, G.I. Joe. The WWE has attempted to put this match into 5th gear and have done a good job doing so but I believe it is too little, too late when it comes to overall excitement for this match. It doesn’t have the same feel as it did going into WrestleMania 28 but I believe the match itself could eventually steal the show and make us forget any of the current negative feelings towards it.

I believe that the WWE has a “trick up their sleeve” for this match that will have the fans talking. Whether it is an angle (reportedly the WWE dabbled with the idea of having John Cena turn heel after getting help from The Shield) or the actual match itself, it will have people talking. With that said, the most sense is for John Cena to walk out of MetLife Stadium as the WWE Champion and while it won’t make the North East wrestling contingency happy, I feel for certain in saying that’ll have fans talking for quite sometime.

Winner: John Cena

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WWE WrestleMania 29 Predictions and Preview

April 03, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

WWE has taken exit 16 off the New Jersey Turnpike and are looking for parking at MetLife Stadium as we have reached the end of the Road to WrestleMania 29. After months of anticipation, the biggest WWE pay-per-view of the year is here and despite questionable booking, WrestleMania should still deliver. I am personally very excited as I will be in attendance for WrestleMania in addition to Axxess, the Hall of Fame ceremony and Raw the night after WrestleMania.

Here I will breakdown each scheduled match and predict who will leave New Jersey victorious after WrestleMania 29.

Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett vs. The Miz (Interactive Pre-Show Match)

It is hard to believe that Wade Barrett against The Miz will be the only pre-show match, but either way it should be an underrated match. It will be interesting to see how this match turns out to be interactive. I suspect some sort of stipulation to be added.

The outcome of this match is not necessarily predictable. Wade Barrett has been portrayed as weak champion, like the midcard champions have in the recent past. The Miz has a good WrestleMania record, even main eventing and winning WrestleMania 27 against John Cena. Some may think WWE would like to keep Miz’s record strong, but it is also debatable if the pre-show would count in the streak.

Both Miz and Barrett have been featured in WWE Studios films recently so that argument can’t be made for either one. WrestleMania should start out strong and one way of doing this is by having the Miz win the Intercontinental title during the pre-show.

Prediction: The Miz wins and becomes NEW Intercontinental Champion

Tons of Funk and the Funkadactyls vs. Team Rhodes Scholars and the Bella Twins

If this match is not added to the pre-show, then I fully expect it to be the first or second match on the card. I may be in the minority, but I have really enjoyed this feud. WWE has done a great job of integrating male and female wrestlers into a believable feud. Tons of Funk and Team Rhodes Scholars are clearly the top tag teams who are not in the WWE Tag Team Championships match. The Funkadactyls are underrated Divas who have been impressive in starting a feud with the returning Bella Twins.

Whichever team wins this match should be next in line for a tag team title match. We have seen Team Rhodes Scholars against Team Hell No numerous times with the same outcome. It would be intriguing to see a babyface team like Tons of Funk feuding with the tag team champions. WrestleMania needs to include dancing from Tons of Funk and the Funkadactyls so the most logical situation would see them win.

Prediction: Tons of Funk and the Funkadactyls win

Chris Jericho vs. Fandango

While I agree with the idea that Chris Jericho could have been better utilized in a WrestleMania match, Fandango has been very impressive the last few weeks. Fandango may come across as annoying and frustrating, but isn’t that what a heel is supposed to do?

Johnny Curtis’s new gimmick matches up well with Chris Jericho. They both have experience in dancing. Jericho was featured on Dancing with the Stars in 2011. However, this fact was never discussed on WWE TV during the feud.

Unfortunately for Chris Jericho, Fandango has to win this match. With a loss, his character would lose complete momentum. He is making his WrestleMania debut and cannot afford a loss. Jericho does not need to win and if you couldn’t tell already, returns to WWE to help others get over.

Prediction: Fandango wins.

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

Ryback was expected to have a big WrestleMania match after becoming one of the top babyfaces in 2012. The early indication was that Ryback would face Big Show, possibly for the World Heavyweight title. WWE changed that decision and decided to push Alberto Del Rio as the top Latino babyface. Ryback still needed a WrestleMania moment and I believe he will get just that this year.

Big Show would have been a difficult opponent for Ryback to deliver Shell Shock to after he botched the move against Tensai. Mark Henry is still a monster and can help Ryback look strong in his WrestleMania debut.

With that said, Ryback needs to win much more than Henry. Ryback has lost each month on pay-per-view since October’s Hell in a Cell. Henry is nearing the end of his career and putting Ryback over would be a logical decision.

Prediction: Ryback wins

WWE Tag Team Champions Team Hell No vs. Dolph Ziggler and Big E Langston

This match in very intriguing for a number of reasons. Big E Langston is making his main roster in-ring debut in this WWE tag team title match. Plus, Dolph Ziggler is still holding the Money in the Bank briefcase. He could potentially leave New Jersey as one-half of the tag team champions and World Heavyweight Champion. Then again, no team has been able to dethrone Kane and Daniel Bryan.

WWE fans have been waiting for the dysfunctional team of Kane and Bryan to break-up prior to WrestleMania 29. This would have led to a match between to the two on Sunday. However, WWE chose to keep the popular pair together and continue their dominance over the less than impressive tag team division.

So who wins this one? Does Big E Langston win or lose in his debut match? Does this unusual pairing of Ziggler and Langston get the honor of defeating Team Hell No?

I don’t think Ziggler and Big E are meant to be tag team champions, but I also don’t like the idea of Langston losing in his debut. Team Hell No has yet to have any serious threats to their titles so perhaps this is the beginning. Then again, Ziggler and Langston could win the match via disqualification and not win the titles.

Prediction: Dolph Ziggler and Big E Langston win the match, but not necessarily the titles.

Big Show, Randy Orton and Sheamus vs. The Shield

The Shield has been very dominant since debuting at Survivor Series 2012 and has yet to be defeated as a group. For whatever reason, WWE thinks the fans might actually believe that The Shield could lose with the addition of Big Show. Orton and Sheamus have been feuding with The Shield for months, but Big Show recently turned semi-babyface.

The addition of Big Show will not change anything. The Shield will still win. The bigger question is whether or not Randy Orton will turn heel. It has been a huge debate among wrestling fans for a long time. Personally, I don’t expect a turn. I won’t be surprised if Orton turns heel and joins the Shield. I won’t be surprised if Orton turns heel and doesn’t join the Shield. However, I still don’t expect it to happen. Orton is still a top name in WWE, but there are others WWE seems more focused on pushing.

The Shield will continue their tremendous teamwork and pin either Orton or Sheamus for the win.

Prediction: The Shield wins. No Randy Orton heel turn.

World Heavyweight Champion Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger

The World Heavyweight Championship match at WrestleMania must be considered the most underrated match and feud in WWE today. It is also very unpredictable. Alberto Del Rio, Jack Swagger or Dolph Ziggler will leave New Jersey as champion, but who will it be? Del Rio could win and Ziggler could cash in. Del Rio could win and Ziggler does not cash in. Swagger could win and Ziggler could cash in. Swagger could win and Ziggler does not cash in.

An argument could be made for Del Rio or Swagger winning. Del Rio is currently getting a huge push as the top Latino babyface. WWE would love to continue to gear towards that audience. At the same time, Swagger has received a lot of attention since returning prior to Elimination Chamber. He and his manager Zeb Colter caught the attention of the mainstream media. Colter’s promos have arguably been the best in the company the last few weeks.

As someone who will be in attendance at WrestleMania, I would love to witness Ziggler’s cash in. I attended WWE TLC 2012 and was hoping it would happen then. Four months later, I have another opportunity to witness a Money in the Bank cash in for the first time in my life.

I am going to go out on a limb here and predict Swagger to win, Ziggler to cash in and see a triple threat feud going forward.

Prediction: Jack Swagger wins. Dolph Ziggler cashes in.

Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar (No Holds Barred Match; If Lesnar wins, Triple H must retire)

This was one of the most expected matches to occur at WrestleMania 29 since Triple H and Brock Lesnar had their match at SummerSlam 2012. With Lesnar winning last August, it is widely expected that Triple H will win this time. However, the stipulation that if Lesnar wins, Triple H must retire actually makes the outcome less predictable.

If Triple H wins, he gets redemption from losing to Lesnar last year. If Triple H loses, he can retire and focus solely on helping run the company. Part of me still feels that Triple H will win because he can continue to be an occasional wrestler. He is not in the same shape he was years ago, but the COO has proven he can still perform. Triple H losing would be looked at as a fake retirement.

Prediction: Triple H wins.

The Undertaker vs. CM Punk

CM Punk will try and do what no man, woman or child has been able to do. He will try to defeat The Undertaker at WrestleMania. Unlike the last number of years, Punk has a realistic chance to win.

After holding the WWE title for over 400 days, breaking the record of the last 25 years, Punk wants to break another record. Undertaker 20-0 in WrestleMania matches, meaning a win would cement Punk’s legacy. The Undertaker probably doesn’t have many more WrestleMania matches left. If someone is going to end the streak, there is a good case for Punk to be the guy.

With that said, I still don’t think CM Punk will end the streak. I feel as though the Undertaker will make it to WrestleMania 30 to face John Cena. Therefore, the streak needs to continue at least one more year.

Prediction: The Undertaker

WWE Champion The Rock vs. John Cena

Twice in a lifetime takes place on Sunday when The Rock defends the WWE title against Royal Rumble 2013 winner John Cena. It has to be considered the least anticipated match at this year’s WrestleMania. The outcome is also considered to be quite predictable.

CM Punk lost the title to The Rock. The plan was for Cena to win the Rumble match and beat The Rock at WrestleMania. It seems as though the plan is moving along quite well.

Is there anyone who thinks The Rock will win at WrestleMania? No one? Good.

I am with the popular choice of John Cena winning. I am in no way a John Cena fan, but The Rock is a part-time wrestler and it wouldn’t make any sense for him to win. If Rock were to win and then lose the title to Cena at Extreme Rules, it wouldn’t be as special. Cena needs to win it at WrestleMania.

Prediction: John Cena wins and becomes NEW WWE Champion.

What are your thoughts on my predictions for WrestleMania 29? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below. Also, be sure to follow me on Twitter as I will be providing my thoughts and pictures throughout WrestleMania weekend as I attend the various festivities.

Seth M. Guttenplan is a WWE Featured Columnist for Bleacher Report and host of OH YOU DIDN’T KNOW!? PWPRadio’s weekly radio show covering all wrestling news and rumors. To read more from Seth follow him on twitter (@sethgutt) and check out You can also like GWP on Facebook here.

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WWE SmackDown Results March 8 and Report

March 10, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week on WWE Friday Night SmackDown, Sheamus faces The Big Show in the main event.

The show opens with Jack Swagger and Zeb Coulter making their way down to the ring. Love this gimmick or hate it, it has gotten Swagger over more than anything he’s ever done. Swagger welcomes us to his America, and he is our future World Heavyweight Champion. Now, show some respect for his friend and mentor, a real American and a “founding father”, Zeb Coulter. Zeb wants everyone to admit something to themselves, that being that we all share the same values as Jack and him. The same sense of patriotism in that we all think alike. We all can see what is wrong with our country, but you are too afraid to say or do anything about it. How many of you know someone who has lost a job because someone else has sneaked across the borders to take a job for a few pesos or a pat on the head? That’s why he and Jack have become our spokesmen. They will represent us when writing a new Bill of Rights for legal citizens. That’s why we the people have had enough. Swagger says enough is enough. He’s drawing a line in the sand and taking America back. Zeb says if we don’t agree, it’s because we’re the problem, and he and Jack are the solution.

Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez interrupt this diatribe, and ADR says they have it all wrong. He says he has the solution. His real America is all about…we get a video of ADR and Ricardo doing a parody of Zeb and Swagger and intentionally making them look stupid. I’m not going to recap the whole thing, but it’s actually pretty funny. Ricardo refers to Mexican food as a threat, and a plot against America. A delicious plot. Back to the arena, ADR just smiles as his music hits. Later tonight, he’ll face Dolph Ziggler one-on-one.

MATCH 1: Drew McIntyre and Heath Slater (w/Jinder Mahal) vs. WWE Tag Team Champions Team Hell No! (Daniel Bryan and Kane, non-title)
Drew attacks Kane at the opening. Kane misses a corner charge, and Drew lays in some clotheslines before running into a back elbow for 2. Drew tags in Slater, and he runs into a back elbow as well. Bryan tags in, and Kane whips him into Slater for a corner dropkick. Bryan lays in some No! Kicks and avoids a back suplex before taking Slater to the floor with a hurricanrana over the top rope. He misses the apron knee but lands on his feet. Drew tries to attack from behind, but Bryan sees him coming and sends him into the guardrail. He turns around to Slater and gets dropped before being rolled back into the ring. Drew tags in and beats Bryan down in the corner before tagging Slater back in. Slater hits some punches and tags in Drew. Bryan ducks a short-arm clothesline and snaps off a beautiful back suplex before tagging in Kane. Slater also tags in, and he’s hit with an uppercut, a kitchen sink and a seated dropkick. Corner clothesline hits, but Slater blocks a second one and goes to the middle rope, jumping off right into an uppercut for 2. Kane hits a sidewalk slam and calls for the chokeslam. Slater fires off some rights off a Mahal distraction and sends Kane into the ropes. Bryan makes a blind tag and there’s a bit of an argument. Slater rolls Bryan up in a schoolboy, but Bryan immediately counters into the No! Lock for the submission win.

WINNERS: Team Hell No!

Matt Striker is in the back with Dolph Ziggler, AJ and Big E. Langston. He asks about Ziggler about his match tonight, which was decided via a Twitter vote. Ziggler said the WWE Universe made their voice heard and voted for him because they want to see the greatest main event in SD history. Is it because Zeb and Swagger told him he didn’t look like he swam through a river to get into this country? Yes. Most importantly, it’s about his briefcase and Langston. When all these stars align against ADR tonight, history will be made. Right, babe? AJ says they’ll make history, babe.

We see a face-to-face between Mark Henry and Ryback as Ryback is headed towards the ring. They stare at each other for a moment before continuing on their separate ways.

Brad Maddox is joining Michael Cole and Josh Mathews for color commentary for some reason.

Damien Sandow is in the ring and he says that, tonight, he, the intellectual savior of the unwashed masses, will face a barbaric brute, the man that Darwin’s theory of evolution forgot. Silence! A man whom instead of choosing to feed his soul with literature and the arts is more than content than feeding his…Ryback music cuts Sandow off.

MATCH 2: Damien Sandow vs. Ryback
Lock-up starts the match, and Ryback backs Sandow into the corner for a shoulder thrust and a chop. He hip tosses Sandow out of the corner before hitting a spinning over-the-shoulder powerslam. Sandow rolls to the floor and crawls to the announce desk, and Ryback quickly throws him back in. Sandow rolls to the other side and hotshots Ryback on the apron before slapping him across the back of the head. Ryback chases Sandow back into the ring, where Sandow drops an elbow and hits a pair of clotheslines before stomping Ryback down. Sandow hits some crossface punches and some knee lifts before connecting with a running boot and a jumping kneedrop. A rear chinlock is applied now, and Ryback armdrags out of it. Sandow connects with some rights but runs into a pair of back elbows and a back body drop. Ryback hits a standing spinebuster and calls for the Meat Hook, which connects. Shell Shocked connects, and Ryback gets the 3.

WINNER: Ryback.

We see some footage from RAW that occurred after the show went off the air. The Big Show was surrounded in the ring by The Shield, eventually getting speared by Roman Reigns and hit with the triple powerbomb. Striker is standing by in the locker room with Show. Show doesn’t know what his beef with The Shield is, other than they got knocked out when they got in his way, and he’ll do the same thing to anyone else who gets in his way. What happened on RAW, he blames Sheamus and Randy Orton. They’re responsible for the attack. His fist is his answer to all of them. Does he need anything else?

Before the next match starts, we get another video for Fandango, as if anyone outside of Johnny Curtis’ family gives a flying crap.
MATCH 3: World Champion Alberto Del Rio (w/Ricardo Rodriguez) vs. Dolph Ziggler (w/AJ and Big E. Langston)
Ziggler fires off some rights before ADR kicks him in the leg. Ziggler hits some gut shots in the corner, followed by an elbow to the back of the head. He sends ADR into the corner, where he connects with an avalanche. Ziggler chokes ADR over the bottom rope, and Langston gets in a cheap shot behind the ref’s back. Ricardo throws a towel at Langston, and Langston stalks him around the ring until AJ tells him to stop. Ricardo grabs his water bucket and goes to throw it at Langston, but he moves, resulting in AJ getting soaked. She then goes after Ricardo, but Langston stops her. She goes around him by climbing into the ring, then chases Ricardo around the ring until Langston intercepts her. The ref’s had enough, and he ejects both Langston and AJ. Commercials.

Back from the break, Ziggler drops an elbow and follows up with the Show-Off Elbow for 2. Ziggler applies a rear chinlock, but ADR fights out and gets in a sunset flip for 2. Ziggler pops back up and hits a dropkick for 2. We see Zeb and Swagger watching from the back as Ziggler hits a snapmare on ADR before applying a body scissors/chinlock combo. ADR fights out once more and sends Ziggler into the corner. Ziggler blocks a charge before getting pancaked. ADR hits a quick kick to the head and avoids a corner charge. Ziggler gets caught in the buckles, and ADR goes up and hits an inverted superplex. Man, I haven’t seen that since Phil LaFon at the ’96 Survivor Series. Both men are back up and trading blows until ADR hits a mule kick. He follows with a couple clotheslines and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Out of the corner, ADR hits a thrust kick to the face for 2. He calls for the rolling jujigatame, but Ziggler intercepts him. ADR sends him to the corner, blocks a kick and hits some forearms to the kidneys. Ziggler fights him off from the apron, but ADR manages to catch him with the Backstabber as he’s coming back in for 2. ADR goes up top, but dives off right into a dropkick for 2. Ziggler misses the rocker dropper, and ADR hits the bridging German suplex for 2. He calls for the step-up enziguri, but Ziggler hits a mid-run tornado DDT for 2. He goes for the Zig Zag, but ADR holds onto the top rope. He goes for the rolling jujigatame, and Ziggler counters into a schoolboy for 2. He blocks a tilt-a-whirl, but ADR keeps spinning and locks in the jujigatame for the submission.

WINNER: Alberto Del Rio. Good match there, and a nice finish to boot.

We see Daniel Bryan and AJ in the back. Bryan calls her a Shetland pony. He says he didn’t see what happened out there, but since she left him at the altar, he is amused by her misfortune. AJ doesn’t care, because her boyfriend still has the MITB contract, and that means she will soon be the girlfriend of the World Champion, a champion who actually knows how to handle a woman like her. The only reason she’s not with him right now is because she was attacked at ringside. Unlike Bryan, she knows how to get along with her partner. Bryan says he has his way of handling issues with Kane, and when he won MITB, he didn’t just carry around briefcase; he WAS champion. AJ reminds him he lost the belt in 18 seconds, and Bryan says that, by dating Ziggler, she should be used to things that last 18 seconds. Bryan walks off as AJ begins seething.

MATCH 4: Yoshi Tatsu vs. Mark Henry
I had almost forgotten Tatsu still worked for WWE. Henry immediately knocks Tatsu down, then hits a jumping splash., back up, Tatsu tries some kicks, but Henry clubs him across the back. Pancake off the ropes by Henry, and the World’s Strongest Slam gets 3.

WINNER: Mark Henry.

Matt Striker is in the back with Sheamus, and Striker informs him The Big Show blames him for the attack by The Shield. Sheamus isn’t surprised. Show’s massive ego took a huge dent because of his first beating at the hands of The Shield. But as far as Show’s concerned, nothing’s ever his fault. If Show is at Universal Studios and fans call him, “Shrek”, that’s not his fault. Or when he plugs up the toilet, that’s not his fault. Or the fact that you can smell him from 10 miles away because he never changes his gear, that’s not his fault. But when Sheamus Brogue Kicks Show’s head off his shoulders later tonight, that won’t be his fault either; it’ll be Sheamus’.

MATCH 5: Tamina Snuka vs. WWE Divas Champion Kaitlyn (w/Layla, non-title)
Snuka kicks Kaitlyn in the gut and whips her down by the hair. Kaitlyn hits a back elbow out of the corner, then nails a clothesline. Back body drop by Kaitlyn, but she misses a clothesline and goes face-first into the ropes, and then rolls to the floor. That looked really bad. We see Cody Rhodes watching from the back. Snuka goes to the outside and knocks Layla into the barricade. Kaitlyn recovers and slides back into the ring. At the same time, Layla is doing the same, but the referee stops her from coming in. Tamina hits a shot to the face and connects with a Samoan drop for 3.

WINNER: Tamina Snuka. We see Rhodes still looking on, and he’s joined by Damien Sandow. Sandow says he can’t believe that in this god-forsaken city (Albany, NY) there’s not a restaurant within 100 miles worthy of their patronage. The good news is they can discuss strategy against the New-Age Outlaws this Monday. Rhodes asks what he thinks of Kaitlyn, and Sandow calls her a commendable in-ring performer. Rhodes wants to know what he thinks of her as a woman. Sandow says she’s made the most of what she can considering she comes from a genetically-deficient pool. Post-haste! Sandow leaves, and Rhodes continues to look at the monitor.

Another Fandango video. He comes out with his unnamed dance partner, apparently for a match with Justin Gabriel. However, Lilian Garcia mispronounces his name. He says no. That is unacceptable. He’ll make his debut when she learns how to pronounce his name correctly: FON-DONG-GO. Lilian does it again, mocking him in the process, and he says it’s still not good enough. Lilian does it one more time, and he’s still not happy. He asks if everyone here is incompetent. He will not compete tonight, and you can thank Jillian (what he calls Lilian) for missing out on the debut of Fandango.

We see Booker T and Teddy Long watching this in the back. Book tells Teddy to find this strutting flamingo and tell him the next time Book puts him in a match, he needs to wrestle. Book and Teddy argue for a moment about how to pronounce his name, and then Teddy leaves to find Fandango.

Am I the only who does not give a rat’s ass about The Undertaker’s return for what will be a total of one match this year? No. No, I can’t be the only one.

MATCH 6: Sheamus vs. The Big Show
Show starts the match with forearms to the back. Sheamus ducks a chop and fires off some strikes. Show shakes them off and nails a headbutt, but Sheamus fights back until Show clubs him across the back and connects with another headbutt. Show hits a body blow in the corner, but Sheamus fights back before getting hit with a spear off the ropes. Sheamus rolls to the floor, and Show follows. Show hits an open-hand chop against the apron before throwing Sheamus back in. Sheamus shoulders him on the way back into the ring before ramming him into the top turnbuckle and hitting the forearms in the ropes. Show drops down before Sheamus can hit all 10, pulls Sheamus to the floor and throws him into the barricade. Commercials.

We’re back, and Show has Sheamus in a top wristlock. Sheamus fights out, but runs right into a sidewalk slam for 2. Show goes to the corner for the Vader Bomb, but Sheamus cuts him off and goes for an electric chair. Show escapes and goes old school, hitting the Alley-Oop for 2. Show puts Sheamus in the corner and hits a series of open-hand chops to the chest, dropping Sheamus to the mat. Show goozles him, but Sheamus headbutts his way out, ducks a clothesline and hits one of his own. Sheamus hits a running shoulder in the corner, a knee lift and another clothesline. Up top, Sheamus goes for the Battering Ram, but Show catches him. He looks for the chokeslam, but Sheamus escapes and hits a DDT for 2. Sheamus goes for White Noise, but Show fights him off. Sheamus ducks a clothesline and picks Show up, connecting with White Noise on the second try. He calls for the Brogue Kick, but Show sees it coming and slides to the floor. Sheamus goes to the apron and nails a flying clothesline. Show fights back with a body shot blow and throws Sheamus back into the ring. Show gets on the apron, where Sheamus nails a Brogue Kick. The Shield’s music hits, and we see them coming through the crowd. They surround the ring, and Randy Orton joins Sheamus. They look at each other and hit the ring.

WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: Sheamus. Sheamus and Orton brawl with The Shield, but are getting dominated. Show gets back in the ring, so The Shield triple teams them. However, he fights them off, and Show, Sheamus & Orton clear the ring. Roman Reigns appears to have had his nose busted open. In the ring, Show knocks Sheamus out with the WMD, and Orton hits an RKO on Show.

End of show.

As always, feel free to follow me on Twitter at ,and if you like Married…With Children, you can follow my Al Bundy parody account at Also follow my personal blog at (feedback is welcome). Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out my mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:

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WWE SmackDown Results March 1 and Report

March 03, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

On this week’s episode of WWE Friday Night SmackDown, Randy Orton faces The Big Show in the main-event.

We are in OKC, and the show opens with Ricardo Rodriguez introducing the World Champion, Alberto Del Rio. Looks like we’re going right into a match. Damien Sandow is the opponent, and before he comes down to the ring, he says that others will say what they will, but he believes ADR fits right in with the rest of America: poor grammar, lackluster word choice, and sentence structure that is absolutely abhorrent. Silence! And above all, you, the World Heavyweight Champion, are accompanied by a man in an outdated, rented tuxedo, wielding a spit bucket. He, on the other hand, is accompanied only by his superior intellect, his timeless good looks, and the jealous gazes of the unwashed masses. You’re welcome. ADR says he wants to talk about “unwashed”. He thinks Sandow needs to wash his mouth, because it smells like caca.

MATCH 1: World Champion Alberto Del Rio (w/Ricardo Rodriguez) vs. Damien Sandow (non-title)
Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are on commentary tonight with Josh Mathews instead of JBL. Not sure the reason for that. Lock-up to start, and ADR gives a clean break. Another lock-up, and Sandow applies a side headlock. He shoulders through ADR, then taunts him. Back to the lock-up, and ADR applies a side headlock. ADR now shoulders Sandow a couple of times, and Sandow rolls to the apron. Back in, Sandow goes back to the side headlock and turns it into a hip throw. Back up, ADR backs him into a corner. Sandow throws ADR to the corner and boots him down before hitting some rights. ADR comes back with a mule kick, a kick to the gut and some rights. Snapmare out of the corner, followed by a kick to the head by ADR. Bodyslam near the buckles, and ADR goes up for the moonsault, which barely connects for 2. Sandow chops him in the throat, then hits a suplex for 2. Rear chinlock is applied, and ADR fights out before Sandow whips him down by the head. Sandow hits a jumping kneedrop for 2 before going back to the rear chinlock. ADR shoves him off, and they go into a crisscross, which ends when ADR trips him and applies a la magistral for 2. Sandow pops up and hits a clothesline for 2. ADR reverses a corner whip, but Sandow blocks the charge. He goes to the middle, but ADR catches him with a kick to the gut. He goes for the rolling jujigatame, but Sandow shoves him off. ADR tries to send Sandow to the floor, and Sandow lands on the apron, where ADR hits a step-up enziguri, knocking Sandow to the floor. Commercials.

We’re back, and Sandow is back in control, hitting a bodyslam. Cobito Aquiet connects for 2, and Sandow is now beating ADR down before going back to the side headlock. ADR fights out, headbutts Sandow, ducks a clothesline and hits a release German suplex. The two trade punches now before Sandow sends ADR into the corner. He misses a charge, and ADR hits a pair of clotheslines and a titl-a-whirl backbreaker. Thrust kick to the face connects, and ADR goes for the pin, getting 2. We see Jack Swagger and Zeb Coulter watching the match on a monitor in the back. ADR calls for the jujigatame, but Sandow escapes and hits an Edge-O-Matic for 2. ADR dodges a boot, ties Sandow up in the ropes, hits some forearms to the back and caps the attack off with a Backstabber for 2. Sandow goes to the corner where he blocks an incoming ADR with a boot and follows up with a flipping neckbreaker for 2. Sandow hits a series a kneelifts and goes for the Terminus, but ADR continues spinning and locks in the rolling jujigatame for the submission win.

WINNER: Alberto Del Rio. Good match to star the show. I hope it doesn’t go downhill from here. Considering the main event is Orton/Show, however, my hopes aren’t very high.

We see Kane sitting in his locker room when he’s approached by Daniel Bryan. They argue over their win on Monday night, and Bryan says they have a rematch tonight, only this time, Kane will be blindfolded and Bryan will have his arm tied behind his back. Kane says fine, and Bryan doesn’t like that. Kane’s fine for 2 reasons: after he beats PTP tonight, he’ll prove once and for all he’s better than Bryan. Second, since he’ll be blindfolded, he won’t have to look at Bryan’s ugly goatface. Bryan starts screaming, “No! No! No!”

MATCH 2-Best-of-3-Falls Match for the WWE United States Championship: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro (Champion)
I haven’t seen a Best-of-3-Falls Match in what seems like forever, so I’m a bit excited here, even if one of the two guys competing is Miz. Lock-up starts, and Miz rolls Cesaro up quickly for 2. Another lock-up, and Cesaro hits a waistlock takedown into a bridge for 2. Side headlock is applied, and Cesaro knocks Miz down with a shoulder for 2. Another headlock, and it leads to a crisscross. Cesaro blocks a hip toss, but Miz does connect with a clothesline for 2. Miz rolls through on a sunset flip and connects with a boot to the face for 2. Cesaro rolls to the floor for a breather before coming back in and booting Miz in the gut. European uppercut connects, but Miz ducks a back elbow and hits a legbreaker. He goes for the figure-4, but Cesaro boots him off. He goes for another boot, and Miz blocks into a dragon screw. Cesaro rolls to the floor and suckers Miz back into the ring, but Miz slides through his legs from the apron and rolls Cesaro up in a sunset flip for 2. He tries for the figure-4 again, but Cesaro counters into a side headlock before connecting with a kitchen sink for 2. Cesaro applies a rear chinlock, and Miz fights out. Miz blocks a kitchen sink with a schoolboy for 2, ducks a clothesline and sends Cesaro to the corner before hitting a clothesline. He goes for the hanging clothesline, but Cesaro catches him on his shoulders and hits a modified fireman’s carry slam for 2. Miz rolls Cesaro up in a small package for 2, but Cesaro gets back up and hits the Neutralizer for 3, putting the score at 1-0 in favor of Cesaro as we go to commercials.

We’re back, and Miz tied things up during the break. We see that, during the commercials, Cesaro came off the middle rope with a dive, but Miz caught him and applied the figure-4 for the submission, tying the score at 1-1. Back to the match, Cesaro quickly grabs Miz in the deadlift gutwrench suplex and follows up with a double stomp for 2. Cesaro goes to a sleeper now, and Miz begins to fade. He starts to fight out, avoids a fireman’s carry and lands a big boot. Miz hits a double-leg takedown before running into a boot to the gut. Cesaro calls Miz a “stupid American” before slapping him hard in the face. Miz comes back with a couple of clotheslines and the Reality Check. Cesaro avoids the neckbreaker, though and shoves Miz off. Miz charges in and gets blasted with a Very European Uppercut for 2. Cesar slaps Miz a few times before Miz chopblocks him and hits a snap DDT for 2. Cesaro headbutts Miz from his knees, and now they trade some punches. Miz gets the best of it and beats Cesaro into the corner, where he connects with the hanging clothesline. Miz goes up top and connects with a double axe handle. He calls for the figure-4 and locks it in while bridging up. Cesaro drags himself to the ropes and manages to get the break. Miz snaps him off the ropes and drags him back to the middle, but Cesaro boots him off into the corner, where the referee is standing. Cesaro runs into Miz and rolls him up, slightly shoving the ref into the corner in the process. Miz continues to roll through and gets 2, but Cesaro rolls through once more and gets the 3 with a handful of tights.

WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Antonio Cesaro. Really good match, and even better than the opener. While I don’t like Miz, guys like Cesaro and Kofi Kingston really help him step up his game, and it shows.

We see Sheamus and Randy Orton in the locker room. Sheamus says Orton is a sitting duck tonight in regards to The Shield. Orton says he’s fine with that, and Sheamus says they’re probably counting on him feeling that way. Orton asks Sheamus what he’s supposed to do about it, and Sheamus tells him he’ll watch Orton’s back. Then again, Orton is such a loner, he wouldn’t be interested. Orton never said he wasn’t interested, and instead says thanks.

Jim Ross makes his way out, and he’s set to do an interview in the ring with Jack Swagger and Zeb Coulter. That’s up next.

Another video for Fandango, who is supposed to debut tonight. I actually just wrote a column about this, and how I don’t expect him to last, based on the career that the man behind the gimmick, Johnny Curtis, has already had.

Jim Ross thanks the crowd for the response, and is happy to be back home. He’s here tonight for a specific reason, and that’s to address one of the most heated, controversial issues he’s ever dealt with in WWE. Please welcome the self-proclaimed “Real American” Jack Swagger, and his associate Zeb Coulter. JR says he and Swagger go back a long way, and he’s always respected Swagger. He lets us know he recruited Swagger for WWE, and Swagger insults the Sooners in the process. Swagger still calls JR a “Real American”, and that’s why he allowed JR to do this interview. Zeb interjects and says that, after last Monday with The Miz, they wanted a forum where they’d be treated fairly. JR insists they’ll be treated fairly, and he has some tough questions. Before he gets to the political views, he reminds us how, on September 3rd, Swagger decided to take a sabbatical and announced it publicly after the latest loss in a streak. After five months, Swagger came back a different man. What happened? Zeb says what happened was he told Swagger the real problems in this country. JR doesn’t understand what Zeb means. Zeb says JR refuses to see. WWE is a microcosm of what’s happening in the US every day. How is it possible Swagger could go on a losing streak and allow ADR to sneak in and take a position that rightly belongs to an American? Every day in this country, thousands of undocumented workers are crossing our borders and taking jobs from real Americans. Jack Swagger and Zeb Coulter will not stand idly by and watch this country self-destruct. Swagger says, “We the people”. JR moves the conversation to WM29 and becoming champion. Zeb interrupts again and says that, when the dust clears, the belt will be around the waist of a natural-born citizen, a real American who speaks English, who recites the Pledge of Allegiance and has worked for everything he’s ever gotten in this country. ADR is not one us, and to be quite honest, he needs to leave this country. Mr. Ross, when you’re in your home in Norman, OK and on your kitchen table is a fruit basket that is rotting, are you going to smell it or throw it out? You’ll dump it. This is our country. We smell something stinky, and that is ADR. Jack Swagger at Wrestlemania is fighting for more than a title; he’s fighting for the heart and soul of OUR country. Swagger does the “We the people” bit again. JR starts laying into Swagger, accusing Zeb of brainwashing him. Zeb interjects once more and says that JR knew Swagger in his formative years, so if there was any brainwashing going on, it was done by JR. Zeb is telling him the reality and truth of what’s going on. JR respectfully disagrees, then tells Zeb to express his right to remain silent. Zeb says that he suggests JR keep a civil tongue in his head, lest he regret something that happens later on. JR doesn’t know what Zeb means, and he doesn’t care. Swagger knocks JR’s hat off, then tells JR that’s Mr. Coulter. Know what Swagger thinks? He was wrong about JR. You’re either part of the solution or the problem, and he along with Zeb is going to fix the problem. JR isn’t a real American; he’s nothing more than a sympathizer, and you know what we do to sympathizers?

ADR interrupts things at this point and immediately gets between Swagger and JR. He puts JR’s hat back on for him, then takes a mic. He says Zeb and Swagger are the problem, and he is the solution, perros. Swagger isn’t a real American; he is a real jackass.

MATCH 3-Kane will be blindfolded while Bryan has an arm tied behind his back: WWE Tag Team Champions Team Hell No! (Daniel Bryan and Kane) vs. The Prime-Time Players (Titus O’Neil and Darren Young) (non-title)
This is a rematch from this past Monday, except Bryan and Kane have their stipulations reversed.
Kane has a goatface blindfold on, courtesy of Bryan. Kane starts the match with Young, and Young is toying with Kane. Kane runs into the corner before nearly tripping over Young. Young taunts the crowd, and Kane lands an uppercut. Titus starts blowing his whistle, and that allows Young to attack from behind. He goes up top, but Kane stumbles into the ropes. Bryan tags himself in, and he fires off some No! Kicks to the chest. A chop in the corner drops Young, but he comes back with some punches. Bryan ducks a clothesline and gets in a one-armed crucifix for 2. Young comes back with a kneelift and tags in Titus. Titus knocks Bryan down as we go to commercials.

We’re back, and Titus sends Bryan into the corner. Bryan blocks a 3-point stance in the corner and tags in Kane. Kane is getting help from the fans as he points around the ring for his target, a la Jake “The Snake” Roberts at Wrestlemania VII against Rick Martel. He finds his mark and hits an uppercut, followed by a hiptoss. Titus tags in Young, and he runs right into a chokeslam. Kane goes for the pin, but Young rolls to the apron. Bryan tags in as Kane accidentally goozles both him and the ref. Kane feels Bryan’s beard and realizes his mistake. Titus has tagged in, and he easily rolls up a distracted Bryan for 3.

WINNERS: The Prime-Time Players. Kane takes the blindfold off and sees the goatface drawing. Bryan tries to calm him down and says he didn’t do it. Bryan asks Kane to hug it out, and Kane instead puts the blindfold on Bryan and hits him with an uppercut.

Matt Striker is in the back with The Big Show and asks about the match with Orton later tonight. Show says this is ‘Mania season, time to make an impact. And what better way for Show to do that than to chokeslam Orton?

Matt Striker is now in the back with Fandango and whoever this girl is. Fandango corrects Striker on his pronunciation a couple of times, and I am already sick of this gimmick. Striker says the WWE Universe is excited for his debut. What’s his fighting style? Fandango lists off his dancing accomplishments, and says it’s time to take his grace to the ring so everyone in the WWE can follow his lead. He then says he won’t make his debut tonight, and won’t debut until Striker gets his name right. Great. Thanks for that complete and utter waste of time, WWE.

MATCH 4: Randy Orton vs. The Big Show
Lock-up starts the match, and Show shoves Orton down. Orton ducks Show and fires off some rights, and Show answers with a body blow. Orton stops a chop with a right and hits a clothesline, followed by 10 corner punches. Show shrugs them off and hits a running shoulderblock. Show with a headbutt, and he backs Orton to the corner for a body blow and an open-hand chop. Another body blow, and now Orton fires back with kicks. Show stops him with a headbutt, then hits another chop to the chest. Show hits a hip bump in the corner before running into a dropkick that sends him to the floor. Commercials.

We’re back, and Show is back in control, attacking Orton’s left arm. Orton comes back with rights until Show headbutts him in the shoulder. Show applies a top wristlock, and Orton breaks it with rights. Show hits another body blow and follows up with the Final Cut for 2. Show goes to the corner and mounts the middle rope, missing an elbow drop. Orton fires off more rights (anyone noticing a trend here?) before running into a goozle. Orton counters into a DDT for 2, and Show rolls to the floor. Orton follows and hits more rights. Show hits another shot to the gut and goes to lawn dart Orton into the post, but Orton escapes and shoves him into the post. Orton tries to pull Show up into the ring, but Show goozles him. Orton hotshots the arm, boots Show in the head and hits the suspended DDT over the top rope. The Shield’s music hits, and we see them coming through the crowd. They hop the rail and surround the ring as Orton looks around. Sheamus’ music hits and he joins Orton in the ring. They finally rush the ring, which leads to the DQ.

WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: Randy Orton. The faces fight off The Shield as Show is still down. The Shield dominate Orton and Sheamus until Show knocks Roman Reigns out with the WMD. Seth Rollins and Dean Ambros leave and drag Reigns out through the crowd. In the ring, Show hits a chokeslam on Orton, but is leveled with a Brogue Kick by Sheamus.

End of show.

Well, the show started out with two good matches and then just slowly fell apart after that.

As always, feel free to follow me on Twitter at ,and if you like Married…With Children, you can follow my Al Bundy parody account at Also follow my personal blog at (feedback is welcome). Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out my mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:

Gerri Davis Banner, NPC National Level Heavyweight and Masters Female Bodybuilder


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WWE SmackDown Results February 22 and Report

February 24, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week’s WWE Friday Night SmackDown opens with Ricardo Rodriguez introducing the World Champion, Alberto Del Rio. We are 44 days away from ADR/Swagger, but only if Swagger doesn’t get his title match taken away as a result of him getting arrested shortly after this taping concluded.

ADR says that last Sunday, he retained his title at Elimination Chamber. So that means he and Ricardo are going to Wrestlemania. He also found out who his opponent is that night, that being Jack Swagger. Swagger has a new friend and a new attitude, and with this new attitude, Swagger believes he is everything that is right with America, and ADR is everything that is wrong. Jack, he saw the State of the Union address on RAW, as well as all the YouTube videos. Swagger says the problem is immigration. According to Swagger, immigrants are taking the jobs from people like him. This country was built by immigrants, real, hard-working people trying to provide their families with a better life. That is why America is so great. Jack, this is the result of his hard work. This (the title) is the result of the American dream. And Jack, if you are a real American, to him, you are just a real jackass. We, the immigrants just want handouts, why don’t you come out here so he can lay his hand out across your face, perro.

Randy Orton’s music hits. He makes his way down to the ring. He says he’ll do his best to stay calm, cool and collected, but something was taken from him. This past Sunday, he was this close to getting a chance at regaining the title in the main event at Wrestlemania, but that was taken from him by Jack Swagger. Part of him admires it, because he would have done the same thing. Another part of him wants to take out all of his aggression on Swagger tonight. He knows it’s ADR/Swagger at ‘Mania, so he’s asking ADR to step aside tonight, as Swagger is his. If they have to fight over it, so be it.

Booker T comes out onto the stage now and he tells everyone to slow down. He doesn’t see SD going down that way tonight. His plans are this: a champion vs. champion match tonight, as ADR will face IC champ Wade Barrett. As far as Swagger goes, he will be going one-on-one with Orton. Randy, you got your wish tonight. Now can you dig that, sucka?

Sheamus is making his way out for a match with Damien Sandow, and that’s next.

Promo video for Fandango. If he makes it more than six months with this gimmick, I will be impressed.

MATCH 1: Sheamus vs. Damien Sandow
Before the match, Sandow has something to say. Tonight, you will all bear witness to a monumental occasion: the destruction of your false idol, Sheamus. A man whose only purpose has been dragging you further into the bowels of your own ignorance. Tonight, Sheamus, your reign of terror comes to an end. You’re welcome. Sandow and Sheamus trade strikes, with Sheamus getting the better of it. Sandow fights back out of the corner until Sheamus trips him. Short-arm clothesline by Sheamus, and Sandow once again fights back. Sheamus blocks a hip toss and hits another short-arm. Clothesline over the ropes sends Sandow to the floor. Sheamus follows, sending Sandow into the barricade. He does it again on the other side before throwing Sandow back in. Sheamus hits the slingshot Battering Ram on the way back in, but Sandow connects with a clothesline out of the corner. Sheamus fights back with rights, but Sheamus grabs him by the hair and hurls him to the apron, where he gets set up for the forearms to the chest. Sheamus goes for a suplex back in, but Sandow drops to the floor. Commercials.

Back from the break, Sandow has Sheamus in a rear chinlock. Sheamus fights out, but Sandow connects with the side-Russian legsweep. Cobito Acquiet follows, as does a clothesline for 2. Sandow hits some crossface punches across the middle rope, then hits Sheamus with a low clothesline and some mounted punches. He chokes Sheamus under the bottom rope with his foot, then goes outside for some punches and elbows across the apron. Back in, Sheamus fights back with strikes, but Sandow cuts him off, hits a snapmare and applies a rear chinlock. Sheamus headbutts his way out, but gets tripped into the middle rope, where Sandow lands a legdrop across the back for 2. Back to the rear chinlock, and Sheamus fights out once more, hitting several rights. He hits a charging shoulder tackle in the corner, follows up with a running knee and a couple of Irish Hammers. Sandow runs right into a tilt-a-whirl, but escapes and shoves Sheamus into the corner. Edge-O-Matic by Sandow gets 2. Sandow with some knee lifts now, and he looks for the Terminus, but Sheamus won’t let him lock it in. Sheamus reverses it and headbutts Sandow before going for White Noise. Sandow escapes and avoids the Brogue Kick before dropkicking Sheamus in the knee. He misses a flipping neckbreaker and runs right into White Noise. Sheamus calls for the Brogue Kick, and it connects for 3.

WINNER: Sheamus.

Wrestlemania XXX is taking place in New Orleans. Honestly, I figured they’d go back to MSG for the big 3-0.

MATCH 2: Aksana and Tamina Snuka vs. WWE Divas Champion Kaitlyn and Layla
Layla and Aksana start the match. Layla randomly dances, so Aksana does the same and gets kicked in the ass. Kaityln tags in, and she hits a flying shoulderblock before applying a rear chinlock. She gets distracted by Snuka, and Aksana knocks her to the floor. Outside, Snuka clotheslines Kaitlyn. Back in, Aksana hits a sidewalk slam for 2. She sends Kaitlyn into the heel corner, then slaps her. Aksana stomps her down before applying a headscissors. Aksana turns it into a Taco Twister before missing a splash off the ropes. Layla and Snuka tag in. Layla hits a hairmare and a hook kick to the face. Dropkick by Layla, followed by LOL. Snuka rolls through, though, and hoists her up for the Samoan drop. However, Layla makes the blind tag, and Kaitlyn spears Snuka for the 3.

WINNERS: Kaitlyn and Layla.

MATCH 3: Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Coulter)
Swagger has new, uber-patriotic marching band entrance music. Swagger pushes Orton to the corner, and they fight all over the ring in the lock-up position, giving a clean break in the middle of the ring. Swagger goes for a quick schoolboy for 1 before Orton comes back with strikes in the corner, stomping Swagger down. Swagger kicks him the knee, but runs into a back elbow. Orton hits a back suplex for 2. Orton chokes Swagger over the middle rope, but he comes back with some rights and shoulder thrusts in the corner. Orton no-sells and punches Swagger down before throwing him to the corner. Swagger reverses a corner whip, and Orton comes back with a clothesline. Snapmare by Orton, and now he goes to the rear chinlock, his most favorite of moves. Swagger counters into a back suplex, breaking the hold. Swagger goes for the pin, getting 2. He drops a series of elbows, then hits a running a shoulderblock. He hits another one, and Orton quickly schoolboys him for 2 before hitting a dropkick. Orton does the Garvin Stomp and follows up with a jumping knee for 2. Swagger rolls to the floor, where he drags Orton toward the ring post, wrapping the leg around the post. Back in the ring, Swagger goes for the Patriot Act (which Josh Mathews is now calling the Patriot Lock. Not sure which is correct now), but Orton kicks him to the outside. Orton hits a horrible Thesz Press on the outside before Swagger rolls back in. He rolls back out, where Orton drops him with a clothesline. Commercials.

We’re back, and the two are trading punches. Orton sends Swagger over the top, but Swagger lands on his feet on the apron. Orton boots him and goes for the suspended DDT, but Swagger back drops him to the floor. Orton lands on his feet and drags Swagger out, where he hits more punches. Swagger reverses a whip into the steps, sending Orton in shoulder-first. He slams Orton face-first into the steps before rolling him back in the ring for 2. Swagger hits some kneelifts in the corner before hitting a modified belly-to-belly suplex. Avalanche connects for another 2. Swagger applies a double chicken wing, and Orton elbows out. Swagger headbutts him before he gets backdropped to the outside. Orton heads outside, hitting a back suplex across the top of the barricade. Back in, Swagger chopblocks Orton from the front, then follows up with the Swagger Bomb for 2. Orton blocks a suplex a couple of times, then hits his own. Swagger pops back up, but misses a shoulder thrust in the corner, hitting the post. Orton loads up the Four Moves of Boredom, but goes for the 3.0 instead. Swagger fights out and kitchen sinks him. He goes for the Swagger Bomb again, but Orton sees it coming and connects with the 3.0 after a kick. Swagger rolls to the apron, where Orton hits the suspended DDT. He coils up for the RKO as Zeb helps Swagger back up. Swagger hotshots Orton, thumbs him in the eye and stacks him up with his feet on the ropes for the 3.

WINNER: Jack Swagger.

MATCH 4: The Miz vs. Cody Rhodes
We get a cut-away promo from Rhodes, and he’s sick of people criticizing him for his mustache. The ladies are apparently calling it a “love-stache”. Looks like WWE is starting a romance angle between him and Kaitlyn as well. Miz starts with a waistlock, and Rhodes trips him up. Crisscross ends with a back elbow by Miz. Rhodes backdrops him to the floor, but Miz lands on the apron and climbs to the top. Rhodes hotshots the bad arm from this position, then stomps the shoulder. He stomps it once more before going for the pin, getting 1. Rhodes applies a hammerlock, and Miz elbows out. Rhodes boots him in the knee, kicks him in the shoulder and lands a dropkick for 2. Rhodes boots Miz in the head, then fires off some rights. Miz fights back and goes for a sunset flip, but Rhodes rolls through and knees him in the face for 2. Rhodes applies a modified armbar, then knees him in the gut. Miz backflips out of a back suplex and lands a big boot for 2. Miz shoves Rhodes to the corner, but misses a shoulderblock. Rhodes goes for the Alabama Slam, but Miz rolls through and applies the figure-4. Rhodes taps.

WINNER: The Miz.

MATCH 5-Champion vs. Champion: Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett vs. World Champion Alberto Del Rio (w/Ricardo Rodriguez; non-title)
Before the match starts, Jack Swagger and Zeb Coulter make their way onto the stage to apparently watch this match. Barrett immediately goes into an arm wringer, and ADR flips out and hits a hip toss. Barrett comes back with strikes in the corner, and ADR counters with corner kicks. Snapmare by ADR, followed by a kick to the spine. Barrett rolls to the floor, where ADR hits a dropkick through the ropes off a Ricardo distraction. Back in the ring, they trade strikes until Barrett sends ADR into the corner. ADR mounts the buckles, and Barrett shoves him to the floor. Outside, Barrett slams ADR face-first into the steps , then whips him into another set. Back in the ring, Barrett goes for a cover, getting 2. He applies a rear chinlock now, but ADR fights out. Barrett ducks a clothesline, hits a mule kick, then follows up with a pumphandle slam for 2. Barrett chokes ADR with his knee over the middle rope, ties him up through the ropes for some kneelifts, then knocks his ass to the floor with a running boot to the face. Outside, Barrett rolls ADR back in the ring for a cover, getting 2. Barrett hits a series of elbows off the ropes for another 2. Barrett goes back to a rear chinlock before whipping him into the corner. ADR blocks a charge and hits a seated dropkick from the middle rope. Back up, ADR ducks a clothesline, hits a couple of his own, ducks another and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. ADR connects with a thrust kick out of the corner, but only gets 2. Barrett pulls himself up in the corner, and as ADR charges in, Barrett catches him with the Winds of Change for 2. Barrett goes for Wasteland, but ADR slides out and shoves Barrett into the corner. ADR blocks a kick, hits some forearms to the back and a Backstabber for 2. He calls for the rolling jujigatame as Swagger begins marching down to ringside. ADR is distracted, and Barrett rolls him up for 2 before hitting a running boot. Barrett calls for the Bull Hammer and pulls down the elbow pad. ADR ducks and manages to lock in the jujigatame, and Barrett taps out.

WINNER: Alberto Del Rio.

End of show.

As always, feel free to follow me on Twitter at ,and if you like Married…With Children, you can follow my Al Bundy parody account at Also follow my personal blog at (feedback is welcome). Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out my mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:

Gerri Davis Banner, NPC National Level Heavyweight and Masters Female Bodybuilder


WWE: Elimination Chamber 2013

WWE: Bret Hitman Hart – The Dungeon Collection

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WWE Elimination Chamber 2013 Results: Rock Retains, Swagger Wins

February 17, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

The WWE 2013 Elimination Chamber delivered as promised, giving fans a very exciting show which set the table for the real main-event in a few weeks. The WrestleMania championship main-events are now officially set as the WWE puts its promotional machine in high gear from now until April 7.

The Rock pinned CM Punk to retain the WWE championship in the main-event. The stipulation was that if Rock got himself disqualified or counted out that Punk would win the title. Punk tried to bait Rock into getting disqualified early on, think Christian vs. Randy Orton. Punk gave Rock a Rock Bottom on the table at one point. The finish came when Punk tossed the Rock into the referee who went down. Punk then hit Rock with a GTS and covered him for the pin while the referee was down. Punk then begged a new ref to get in the ring. As he did The Rock caught him in a spine buster and then dropped a People’s Elbow recreating the sequence he used to win the Rumble match but Punk kicked out. Punk rolled onto the new referee’s ankle shortly thereafter who went down. Heyman handed Punk the belt. Heyman held Rock who ducked and took the belt shot. Rock hit a Rock Bottom on Punk for three. I thought for a second the referee would see the belt in the ring and teased a DQ but he didn’t. JBL put over the fact that Punk had Rock beat and no referee was there. This could be a tease for a Triple Threat Match if The Undertaker isn’t wrestling Punk at Mania. I liked this match a lot better than their Royal Rumble match. Punk was on offense for most of the match. It had a faster pace and told a better story.

Alberto Del Rio retained the WWE world heavyweight championship in the opener against The Big Show. Del Rio tapped out Show after hitting an enzuigiri into a cross armbreaker. I thought it was a pretty average match, especially coming off of a Last Man Standing Match last month. The shocker to me was Dolph Ziggler not cashing in Money in the Bank here. I was so convinced that I probably would have bet on it.

Jack Swagger won the Elimination Chamber and a title shot against the world heavyweight champion at WrestleMania. I don’t think anyone could have predicted that a year ago right? This was just a fantastic match. Chris Jericho and Daniel Bryan started the match off. Bryan and Kane worked together initially until Bryan tried to pin Kane with a school boy. The crowd loved this. Mark Henry was the last to enter and all men were still alive in the match at this point. Henry quickly eliminated Daniel Bryan. Henry then tossed Randy Orton through the glass pod. Henry eliminated Kane next with a slam. Jericho and Jack Swagger worked together to double suplex Henry on the steel floor. Orton wound up sneaking up behind Henry with an RKO and eliminating him after Henry took a code breaker from Jericho and a kick to the face from Swagger. Henry came back in and delivered slams to Swagger, Orton, and Jericho, laying them all out until Booker T ordered him to the back. Orton eventually pinned Jericho with an RKO. Swagger snuck in behind and pinned Orton with a school boy to win the match and pull off the upset. Everyone here worked real hard and got an early lead on the WWE Match of the Year.

This now confirms what I wrote last week in that the Uncle Zeb angle on RAW looked like it was to start some heat for an Alberto Del Rio feud. It makes sense and the win tonight was super impressive, but I just think that Swagger needs a little more time to get people believing in him as a title threat. Swagger has been jobbed out for the last several years and fans remember that. I have always thought Swagger was underutilized but I think he still needs time. Regardless, they are going with Del Rio vs. Swagger and I’d expect a ton of cheap heat to get anyone caring.

Where this leaves Dolph Ziggler is what I want to know. He won Money in the Bank over the summer and hasn’t cashed in. Logically you’d think he’d want to cash in at WrestleMania at this point. Throwing him into the match would muddy it down. The only idea I see coming out of this is Del Rio retaining and Ziggler cashing in at WrestleMania and winning the world heavyweight title. Anything else would make no sense to me.

The Shield defeated Ryback, John Cena, and Sheamus. I was disappointed in this one early on but they really picked it up towards the end. The crowd absolutely ate it up which made it even that much more exciting. Seth Rollins pinned Ryback after Roman Reigns nailed Ryback with a spear while he was going for Shellshock. I have to admit that I am real surprised to see Ryback take the pin here. Reigns is being pushed here as something special with the emphasis clearly on him as a monster. One thing I should point out here is that Ryback stormed out and left without Cena and Sheamus. That could be a set up for something. I suspected that he’d be turning coming out of the Royal Rumble. I haven’t heard anything but I sense something there. Regardless, The Shield get a big win here and Ryback takes a big loss.

The table is set for the top of the WrestleMania 29 card with The Rock vs. John Cena for the WWE championship and Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio for the WWE WHC. At this point I’d look for something with Ryback and possibly Sheamus. If The Undertaker is returning I’d expect your first big hint on Monday night along with some movement towards the Brock vs. Triple H rematch. All in all it is one of the more loaded WrestleMania lineups in recent years.

Overall I’d give this pay per view a huge thumbs up. This one was exciting and fast paced for most of the night and delivered three fantastic matches (four if you count the four great minutes of Kofi vs. Ziggler). I can’t recall a time in recent memory where the WWE has been this hot. This is exactly what you want heading into WrestleMania.

Full WWE Elimination Chamber 2013 results & winners…
The Rock defeated CM Punk to retain the WWE championship
Kaitlyn defeated Tamina to retain the WWE Divas title
Dolph Ziggler defeated Kofi Kingston
The Shield defeated John Cena, Ryback, and Sheamus
Jack Swagger pinned Randy Orton to win the SmackDown Elimination Chamber Match
Antonio Cesaro defeated The Miz via DQ
Alberto Del Rio defeated The Big Show to retain the WWE WHC
Brodus Clay and Tensai defeated Team Rhodes Scholars

WWE: Elimination Chamber 2013

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WWE SmackDown Results February 15 and Report

February 17, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week is the “go home” episode of SmackDown, as Elimination Chamber takes place this weekend. I gotta be honest-this year’s installment looks pretty weak. Last year was a great show, but this one just has me saying, “Meh”.

We’re in Little Rock, AR tonight, and the show opens up with the #1 contender for the World title, The Big Show. We see a replay of what happened to him last week, and he doesn’t find it funny. He hopes we are happy. Because of those actions, three innocent people on RAW suffered his wrath. Alberto Del Rio has never pinned Show. ADR doesn’t have what it takes to pin Show. He will never pin Show. The rage Show has inside right now will unload at EC. He’s going to ball that rage up nice and tight, and when he lets it fly, ADR’s fiesta will turn into a siesta.

Chris Jericho makes his way down to the ring, returning to SD for the first time in quite a while. Jericho says he’s known Show for 16 years. He can read him like a book and knows what he’s feeling right now. Show says that, if Jericho knows him like he says, Jericho needs to be as far away as possible. Why are you here? Shouldn’t you be on tour with Fozzy or writing a book? Shouldn’t you be hosting a robot fighting show? Stay away. Jericho says he’s back in WWE, and he feels better than ever, and everyone knows it to be true. But, he can read Show like a book, and knows he’s angry and maybe a little doubtful. They’ve been tag champs. He knows how dangerous Show is, and he’s the biggest force in this company. However, Jericho is a 6-time champion. He has been in more Chamber matches than anyone. This Sunday, he’s in another one. If and when he wins the Chamber and if and when Show wins the title, it’s Jericho/Show at Wrestlemania. If that happens, Jericho will beat him for the title, and that’s a fact Show can never…EEEEEVVVVVEEEERRR…forget again. Show says they’ve been through a lot together. If Jericho wins at EC and Show wins the title, it’ll be the last ‘Mania appearance of Jericho’s career. Get out of his face before he hurts you so bad you can’t make it to EC.

SD General Manager Booker T comes out to the stage, and he sees where this is going. He likes it, so since we don’t know if that ‘Mania match will happen, let’s make it happen tonight. Tonight, the main event will be The Big Show vs. Chris Jericho. Now can you dig that, sucka?

Randy Orton gets stopped by Matt Striker in the back. Striker asks about facing Mark Henry tonight. Orton starts to answer, but just stares. The camera pans over to show Henry standing there. They stare each other down as Henry’s music hits. Henry leaves.

The Rock is in the building tonight.

MATCH 1: Mark Henry vs. Randy Orton
Mark Henry hitting the World’s Strongest Slam on Hornswoggle is one of the best things I’ve ever seen. Right up there with Bender steering the Planet Express ship with his ass. Henry backs Orton into the corner with a lock-up, giving a clean break. Another lock-up, and Henry throws him to the corner. Orton fires off some rights before sending him face-first into the middle buckle. Henry rolls to the floor, and Orton follows, knocking Henry down. Back in the ring, Henry drops Orton with a headbutt. He beats Orton down in the corner, then throws him across the ring. Orton recovers and knocks Henry down, following up with a dropkick. Mounted punches in the corner by Orton, but Henry throws him to the floor. Commercials.

We’re back, and Henry has a trapezius claw applied. Henry clubs him down before hitting a running powerslam for 2. He punches Orton in the back of the head before going back to the trapezius claw. Orton fights out, so Henry throws him to the corner. Orton blocks an avalanche, then tries a clothesline. A second one knocks Henry off his feet. Orton ducks one by Henry, but Henry ducks another attempt by Orton before connecting with one. Orton escapes a WSS and hits a snap DDT for 2. Henry rolls to the apron, where Orton connects with a suspended DDT. Orton calls for the RKO, but Henry shoves him off and forearms him in the face, knocking Orton to the floor. Orton tries for an RKO outside, but Henry shoves him off once more. He goes for the WSS again, but Orton slides out over the barricade. Orton hits a gut shot on Henry with a chair, leading to the DQ.

WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: Mark Henry. Orton rolls into the ring behind Henry and cracks him over the back with the chair. He goes for a chairshot to the face, but Henry grabs the chair, swings Orton into the ropes with it and nails him with the World’s Strongest Slam.

We see Henry in the back after the commercials. He grabs a mic out of Striker’s hand and says he’s been at home for 9 months, frustrated about his return. Well, it’s official-the Hall of Pain is open for business, and it’s been getting full as of late. You see what happened to Orton. They’re going to lock five stars in a steel cage with him. He suggests law enforcement is handy, as well as the national guard, the army, the marines and the navy, because they’re going to need it. Nobody, and he means nobody, is stopping his road to Wrestlemania.

Before Tamina is introduced for the next match, we’re “treated” to another Fandango vignette. This time, he’s dancing with a woman, and pronounces his name FAHN-DAHN-GOO. A fancy new gimmick is not going to help Johnny Curtis at all. You know, Pepper, you can’t polish a turd.

MATCH 2: Layla vs. Tamina Snuka
Snuka backs Layla into the ropes with a lock-up, then shoves her. Another lock-up, and Layla goes into a waistlock. Snuka elbows out and goes for a hip toss, but Layla counters into a roll-up for 1. Jackknife by Layla for 2. Springboard cross-body for 2. Layla bumps her ass in Snuka’s face, knocking her to the floor. Layla tries a dropkick from the apron, but Snuka moves and trips Layla, sending her crashing to the apron and to the floor between the ring and the skirt. Back in, Snuka stomps Layla for 2. A rear chinlock is applied by Snuka. Layla fights out, so Snuka whips her down by the hair. Snuka goes back to the rear chinlock, and we see Kaitlyn watching from the back. Layla fights out once more, so Snuka knees her in the gut and whips her into the buckles. Snuka misses a charge, and Layla schoolgirls her for 2. Layla hits a few kick, misses a crescent kick but connects with a savate kick. She goes for a cross-body, but Snuka catches her and throws her into a Samoan drop. Up top, Snuka connects with the Superfly Splash for 3.

WINNER: Tamina Snuka. While her splash isn’t the most graceful, she definitely gets some height.

The Rock makes his way out, and he wants to make something clear to CM Punk: Punk, this past Monday, you ran off with the title, but that doesn’t make you champion. You only made a trade, and that trade is holding onto the Rock’s belt for 6 days in exchange for an ass-kicking that will haunt you forever. Punk, you can hear the people, because what happens on Sunday is Rock will make you suffer. The people want it, and they want you to be treated like the spoiled little boy you are. You lose your toy, so you run your mouth and try to steal it back, keep a “yes man” like Heyman around…Rock isn’t a spoiled boy; he’s a man. It took Rock 10 years to win the belt back, and it will take him one night to make sure Punk never touches it again.

We see Punk and Heyman on the TitanTron. Punk says this isn’t a belt; this is a title, and it belongs to the best in the world. Everyone saw at the Royal Rumble when Rock committed grand larceny. Now he’s here, throwing a fit. He complains about Punk throwing a fit, but he’s doing the same thing. He’s angry, and that fits into Punk’s plan. He wants a beating from Rock. He wants him to get DQ’ed, because that means he wins at EC. He beat Rock 1-2-3 at the Rumble, and just to change things up, he’s going to let Rock beat himself. If Rock gets DQ’ed or counted out, Punk wins. The People’s Era will be a blip on the radar. After this Sunday, Punk will still be champion. Rock says Punk talks a big game about what he’ll do. These days, Punk’s words are worthless. He said he’d stop Rock at the Rumble, and he didn’t. Rock promised he’d be champion, and he held up his promise. Even after The Shield was paid off, at the end of the night at the Rumble, Punk got beat. Here’s what Punk should do: He should think about what will happen Monday. Punk will wake up and realize he failed. This Sunday, Punk is a spoiled little boy, and he’s facing the Rock, a steamroller of a man. Rock will beat Punk this Sunday and go onto ‘Mania as champion, and everyone knows it, including Punk…if you smell what The Rock is cooking.

MATCH 3: Jinder Mahal and Heath Slater (w/Drew McIntyre) vs. Brodus Clay and Tensai (w/The Funkadactyls)
Tensai and Slater start the match. After a mini dance-off, Slater boots Tensai in the gut and goes for an Irish whip. Tensai counters and hits an uppercut. Slater comes back with a jump kick and tags in Mahal, who stomps Tensai down. Mahal hits a running knee for 2 before applying a rear chinlock. Tensai fights out and botches a Sidewinder after catching Mahal off the ropes. Clay tags in and clotheslines Mahal. Exploder suplex connects, and he drops an incoming Slater with a headbutt to the chest. The faces hit a pair of avalanches and Tesnai hits a Derailer on Mahal. Clay follows up with Ah, Funk It for the 3.

WINNERS: Brodus Clay and Tensai. After the match, The Shield’s music hits, and they come down through the crowd. The faces try to fight them off, but The Shield is too much for them. Tensai gets hurled into the steps on the outside, and now they are triple-teaming Clay in the ring. They beat Clay down before hitting the triple powerbomb. Dean Ambrose grabs a mic and he tells the crowd this Sunday won’t look any different. John Cena, Sheamus and Ryback, you will learn the hard way that your actions have consequences. This Sunday, you will be put on trial, sentenced, and you will believe in The Shield. Nothing against Rollins or Reigns, but they should just let Ambrose do all of the talking for them, all the time.

Another vignette for Tobey Maguire-er, I mean Fandango.

MATCH 4: Cody Rhodes vs. The Miz
Miz’s taped up thanks to Antonio Cesaro beating his ass this past Monday. Miz starts with a waistlock, and Rhodes fights out before Miz slaps him. Miz applies a hammerlock, and Rhodes counters into a side headlock. Crisscross ends in a Miz back elbow. Rhodes blocks a corner charge and goes to the middle rope, but Miz yanks him back down. Rhodes boots him in the bad shoulder and hits a hammerlock slam for 2. Rhodes begins working over the bad arm and shoulder, then beats him down against the ropes. Rhodes applies a top wristlock, but Miz eventually armdrags him off. Miz hits a couple clotheslines and goes for the Reality Check, but Rhodes shoves him into the buckles. Miz blocks a charge and goes for a spear, but Rhodes counters into a sunset flip. Miz rolls through and goes for a boot. Rhodes ducks and schoolboys him for 2. Rhodes arm whips Miz back down and goes for the Beautiful Disaster, but Miz catches him and goes for the figure-4. He gets it applied, and Rhodes taps.

WINNER: The Miz.

MATCH 5: Zack Ryder vs. Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Coulter)
I do not understand pulling Dutch Mantell out of the mothballs. Again. It’s fine that Swagger now has a mouthpiece other than Vickie Guerrero, but is Dutch really the best they could do? Harvey Whippleman wasn’t available? Swagger tackles Ryder, then forearms him in the back. Ryder comes back with some forearms to the face. He tries to block a corner charge with the knees, but Swagger catches him and whips him down. Swagger hits some kneelifts in the corner, then sends Ryder hard into the opposite buckles. Ryder ducks a clothesline and hits a flapjack. He beats Swagger down in the corner and calls for the Broski Boot, but misses. Swagger grabs the leg and whips it around the ringpost. Back in the ring, Swagger chopblocks Ryder’s bad leg before connecting with the falling Doctor Bomb and applying the Patriot Act for the tapout.

WINNER: Jack Swagger. Swagger grabs a mic and introduces his great friend. This man is a native and a great American. This man is Zeb Coulter. Zeb takes the mic and says that in the Declaration of Independence, all men are created equal, but it’s the choices that define you. Do you end up being a great patriot like him and Swagger, or a real American like they are? Or, do the choice you make resemble a clown like Zack Ryder, who cares more for his hair and tan than the country he lives in? You people are not blind, but you refuse to see. Their eyes are wide open. This country is broken, and they know how to fix it. Swagger is a great man, a great patriot and a real American. He knows how to fix the problem, and it starts right here. Remember: We the people. Zeb Coulter is officially the favorite wrestling performer of Fox News.

Matt Striker is backstage with Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez. He reminds ADR that Show said he’s never pinned Show. ADR says they won’t answer that question. Ricardo, is he the champion? Si. Did he beat Show twice? Si. Did he look like a giant punk last week? Si. Show was right, though. He’s never pinned Show. However, he loves to do the impossible. Will he pin Show on Sunday and retain his title? Si! Si! Si!

MATCH 6: The Big Show vs. Chris Jericho
Show immediately backs Jericho to the corner, and Jericho reverses things before landing a few punches. Show shoulders him down off the ropes, then headbutts him, sending him to the floor. Show follows out and hits an open-hand chop against the announce desk. Back in the ring, Jericho hits a springboard dropkick, sending Show back down to the floor. Jericho hits a baseball slide, then heads out himself. Show grabs him and throws him over the announce desk. Back in, Show headbutts Jericho down to the mat. Open-hand chop against the ropes follows, as does another headbutt. Jericho tries to fight back, but Show stops that with a bodyslam. Show drags Jericho to the corner, where he goes up top. Jericho cuts him off, and Show shoves him away before hopping back down. Jericho goes up top now, and Show grabs him by the throat. Jericho hotshots the arm, then dropkicks Show in the knee before booting him in the face. Show comes back with a spear, getting 2. He calls for the chokeslam, but Jericho breaks the goozle before going up top once more. However, he jumps off right into a chokeslam. Jericho rolls to the floor, and Show seems content on a count-out for a moment. He finally rolls to the outside, where he tosses Jericho back in the ring. He mounts the middle rope, but Jericho avoids a big elbow. Lionsault connects for 2. He goes for the Codebreaker, but Show holds on. Jericho slides out into a sunset flip, and Show picks him up for a tree slam. Jericho counters with a DDT, getting 2. Jericho hits a seated dropkick to the side of the head, then tries to apply the Walls. Show eventually boots him off, and as Jericho gets back up, he walks right into a WMD for the 3.

WINNER: The Big Show. We see ADR and Ricardo staring at Show from the stage.
End of show.

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WWE: Elimination Chamber 2013

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