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WWE WrestleMania 33 Thoughts

WrestleMania Sundays are now getting longer and longer.  And I thought last year took a while for WrestleMania to finish.  But last Sunday was the time of year for my friends and I converge in an evening of matches, food, and banter that is also known as WrestleMania 33.  Due to coming home late Sunday night/early Monday morning, dealing with a crying four-month old son getting over a cold, and having to work the next day, I was a tad behind on this article.  But I did enjoy WrestleMania as well as the company of friends.  Let’s delve in a bit shall we?

Note: This article was written without watching Raw the next night as I passed out due to exhaustion.

The man cave is open for WM33 business.  Will our guest’s F-Bombs go over or under last year’s count of 85?  His daughter does the official tracking.  Even though us adults were mostly sober we thought we saw two wrestling rings in the middle of the stadium.  Turns out it was partially true.  The one above the real ring seemed not user friendly but could be used by someone during the evening.  Maybe Shane O Mac with a flying elbow?

Neville/Airies – One of the matches I wanted to see I missed because it was the kickoff match and I was still en route to my friend’s house.  I’m fan of both wrestlers.  Neville retained as I expected but I hope to see a rematch at the next pay per view.  This feud can last for a while.

Andre The Giant Battle Royal – I arrive at the house a couple minutes into this match and all of a sudden my predicted winner Braun Strowman gets thrown over the ring.  Mojo Rawley wins?  Ok.  I guess if Zac Ryder can win a WM match anyone can, right?  Gronk makes an appearance?  I loved that the female security guard had no idea who Gronk was and almost restrained him.  Lucky for Gronk he came away uninjured because you know Belichick would dump him if he got hurt again.  Patriots head coach Belichick and quarterback Tom Brady proved they can win without Gronk.

WrestleMania host The New Day come out – Someone said Big E Langston had a little barb at Paige’s situation?  Didn’t hear it due to chatting amongst ourselves.

Shane McMahon/AJ Styles – Expecting craziness whenever Shane O Mac wrestles.  Styles ended being the lone Smackdown wrestler who had no one to wrestle so ended up with Shane O Mac.  Started off slow but led to a gradual build up along with a no shocker win for Styles.  Unfortunately, that other ring in the sky wasn’t used by Shane.

Dean Ambrose/Baron Corbin – A match we all thought was part of the regular card somehow slithered its way to the kickoff.  Fortunately, no forklifts were used in the match; nor did Gronk interfere.  Ambrose won with a clean pin.

WrestleMania host The New Day come out – Someone said Big E Langston had a little barb at Paige’s situation?  Didn’t hear it due to chatting amongst ourselves.

Shane McMahon/AJ Styles – Expecting craziness whenever Shane O Mac wrestles.  Styles ended being the lone Smackdown wrestler who had no one to wrestle so ended up with Shane O Mac.  Started off slow but led to a gradual build up along with a no shocker win for Styles.  Unfortunately, that other ring in the sky wasn’t used by Shane.

Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho – Two big matches to open the show.  Got the match we expected from the two competitors with KO winning it and becoming new United States champion.  Loved Owens laying his one finger on the rope to avoid a pin.  It took this long for someone to do something like that?  Owens moves on while Y2J takes his occasional leave of absence to focus on Fozzy and other stuff.  This was quite possibly Y2J’s best run in the WWE of his career.

Raw Women’s Title Match – Surprised this got the biggest crowd pop so far; but deservedly so.  All four women showing off their moves and domination.  I assumed Charlotte would win it based on her father’s booking back in the NWA days.  Guess I better step up to the 21st Century.  To be honest, I still don’t see Bayley as world title material but maybe she will prove me wrong over time and more seasoning.

Nine F-Bombs so far as the count much lower than expected most likely due to kids hanging out with.  Although they most likely have heard the F-Bomb plus many more obscenities but we’re gentlemen and ladies.  Downed a piece of pizza a handful of crab fries thanks to another guest’s wife, and Roast Beef sandwich to sop up the beer and shot of whiskey.

WWE Hall of Fame Inductees – Missed the ceremony but will check it out on WWE Network.  I thought this was one of the better classes in recent years.  Rick Rude, DDP, Rock N Roll Express, Kurt Angle, Beth Phoenix, Teddy Long.  Rude was one of my all-time favorite heels.  He was funny as a commentator with Joey Styles in the ECW days.  DDP deserved induction starting out as a manager of Bad Company in the AWA to a top roster superstar.  Did it all on his own.  Rock n Roll Express were one of the best tag teams in the 80’s.  They had great chemistry as a tag team.  Kurt Angle one of the all-time greats with toughness while making fun of himself.  Kudos for Phoenix and Long.

Tag Team Title match – I thought The New Day would announce themselves as a surprise entrant but we got better news; the return of the Hardy Boyz.  Could it be the 2nd ring will be used for Jeff hardy to jump off of?  Huge pop for the Boyz and happy to see them back where they belong.  To no surprise they won the titles.  I thought Gallows & Anderson would retain if the Boyz weren’t there.

So far 15 F-Bombs, more beer, along with sodium & cholesterol laden foods.

Cena/Bella vs. Miz/Maryse – You know how I feel about the Miz but he was Awesome! Playing John Cena in the promos while Maryse was Nikki Bella.  Did anyone really think Miz & Maryse would this match?  If so, I have Enron stock and a pair of Unicorns to sell you.

HHH vs. Rollins – I swear if Rollins lost this match I think he would’ve lost confidence in real life and never ever get anything right.  It was him against the world, the universe, and galaxy with a gimpy knee.  Kind of similar situation that I was in 12 years ago when my former manager basically dumbed me down to the point where I couldn’t get an account reconciliation right.  Luckily, Rollins moved out of the way of HHH’s punch that connected on his wife Stephanie.  A Pedigree, a win, and confidence restored for Rollins.  Yay!

24 F-Bombs and more munching on chips, roast beef, and tomato pie.  I’ll be paying for it the next day.  By the way, why not switch Pitbull’s performance with the Neville/Airies match?  That way I could’ve seen the match and missed Pitbull.

Bray Wyatt/Randy Orton – Great build to WrestleMania but the obvious choice was Orton winning via RKO.  I hope this feud continues and the bookers continue to give Wyatt ample world title opportunities.  Watching the creepy crawly images inside the squared circle reminded me of Alice In Chains video “Them Bones”

Lesnar/Goldberg – Turns out it was another squash match but this time it went Lesnar’s way.  Felt like the Goldberg craze deflated the past month.  The fact that Goldberg supposedly wasn’t a happy camper with the training and travel may have turned off fans.  I understand he did it for his son but do it for yourself as well.  Feeling Lesnar will be a part time champ and eventually handing it off to Reigns in the near future.

Women’s Smackdown Title – Internet was buzzing that this match may have been scrapped.  Here’s a thought, plan accordingly within time constraints!  Internet issues made us miss a few minutes of the match.  I picked Becky Lynch to win this match but Naomi comes back to get the belts again.

Roman Reigns/Undertaker – Taker’s entrance was times at five minutes, twenty-three seconds.  That time would’ve double had Taker started at the top of the runway.  I was the only one in the room that picked Taker to win the match.  Is it me or was it a bad idea for Reigns to win?  Taker losing tarnished his WrestleMania dominance a bit losing two of his last three WrestleMania matches.  A win and then ride into the sunset.  Let the Roman Reigns heel era officially begin!  Thank you Undertaker for many years of great memories.  I assume that’s it?

Final F-bomb count was 35.  Way under than last year.  Texted my wife at 12:07 am telling her I’m coming home.  And that’s a wrap for WrestleMania 33.  I had fun.  Did you?

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Paul Laska

Paul Laska is a Self-Published Author, Sports Writer, & Travel Writer who resides in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Currently working on articles on Sevilla, Lisbon, and Oregon while writing a new novel for a 2015 release. Check out my Facebook page, Laska Travels. I'm also a freelance writer. Contact me for potential projects.

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