This week’s WWE Friday Night SmackDown wraps up the road to Payback and features Bray Wyatt in a Last Man Standing Match and a champion vs. champion bout.
MATCH 1: Kofi Kingston vs. Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman)
Cesaro starts with a fireman’s carry takedown, then applies an arm wringer. Kofi reverses into a headlock. They crisscross, Kofi ducks a clothesline, then gets hit with a shoulder. He pops back up with an armdrag. On a second attempt, Cesaro blocks it and turns it into a backbreaker. Cesaro nails a European uppercut, then press-slams Kofi face-first before hitting a double stomp. Cesaro nails a forearms and whips Kofi across the ring. Kofi leaps to the middle buckle and hits a missile dropkick. He avoids a corner charge and follows up with a springboard clothesline for 2. Kofi nails a couple kicks, Cesaro blocks one, and Kofi pops another out off the block for 2. He ducks a couple clotheslines, then turns a tilt-a-whirl into a roll-up for 2. He goes for a cross-body from the top, but Cesaro meets him in mid-air with a Very European Uppercut for 3.
After the match, Cesaro lays Kofi out with the Neutralizer.
Renee Young is standing by with Bad News Barrett. Barrett says his IC title is not in jeopardy at Payback. And if you think that isn’t the case, he’s got some bad news. He’s facing RVD, who has nothing but pathetic hand gestures while hanging onto his past. Onto tonight, the English have never been afraid of the Irish, and that won’t change tonight. Sheamus is the US Champion, which doesn’t make sense, since he’s not from the US. The US is just one country, while Barrett is the champion of all the continents in the world. Tonight, Sheamus finds out Barrett is in charge of the biggest empire in WWE. Thank you very much.
MATCH 2: Tamina Snuka vs. WWE Divas Champion Paige (non-title)
Page gets a cut-away promo. She’s excited about facing Tamina because she’s excited to prove to everyone she deserves to be here, as well as to be the WWE Divas Champion. The two lock up, and Tamina shoves Paige back. They go at it again, Paige throws Tamina to the corner and hits some forearms. Alicia Fox walks down to the ring, and that allows Tamina to nail a clothesline off the distraction. Paige comes back with a cross-body for 2, then a sunset flip for another 2. She spots Fox once again, and Tamina nails a kick, followed by a headbutt. Fox grabs the title and is parading around with it. Paige tells the ref to get the belt back. Tamina uses the distraction yet again, nailing a superkick for 2. Tamina ties Paige up in the ropes, and Paige tries to fight her way out. Tamina throws her to the corner, then misses a splash. Paige hits a series of back elbows, followed by a series of short-arm clotheslines. She hits a low dropkick, nails a couple of knees to the face and screams at Fox. She turns around and Tamina goes for the Samoan drop. Paige escapes and turns it into the Paige Turner. She follows up with the PTO for the submission win.
Renee Young is with Sheamus. She points out the issues with Cesaro and wants to know the story. Sheamus says it started a couple of weeks ago when Cesaro refused a handshake. He then attacked Sheamus, making a bad situation worse. Now, it’s personal. Onto Bad News Barrett, he wasn’t the greatest geography student, but he knows a bit about physics, and when the Brogue Kick connects with Barrett’s face, it’ll send his teeth down his throat. And that’s not bad news, that’s good news…fella.
Another Bo Dallas video. Not sure why we’re still getting these since he’s already debuted.
MATCH 3: Xavier Woods vs. Bo Dallas
After Dallas comes out, he introduces himself and says that, thanks to his Bolievers, he’s undefeated at 2-0. If you work hard enough, your dreams can and will come true. All you have to do is Bolieve. They lock up and Dallas hits a couple of quick armdrags before dropping to the floor to scream excitedly at fans. Back in, they shake hands and then lock up. Woods applies a side headlock, slides under Dallas’ legs and hits a dropkick. Dallas breaks a waistlock by sending Woods through the ropes and to the floor. Back in, Dallas hits a back suplex and a series of quick kneedrops before hitting a kneedrop from a handstand. He applies a cravat, and Woods escapes. He ducks a couple of clotheslines, hits a forearm and a couple of clotheslines of his own. Woods lands a spinning back kick and a seated dropkick out of the corner. The Honor Roll connects for 2, and now Woods slides to the apron. He nails a kick from the apron, then heads up for a cross-body. Dallas meets him in the air with a dropkick. Dallas hits the Bodog (Jesus) and gets 3.
WINNER: Bo Dallas. The Bodog? Really? Wrestlers are getting so lazy with naming their finishers.
After the match, Dallas thanks the crowd, says we’re all winners, and all you have to do is Bolieve. He then hugs Woods.
MATCH 4: Jinder Mahal (w/Hornswoggle, Drew McIntyre and Heath Slater) vs. El Torito (w/Los Matadores)
3MB are so valued they don’t even job to full-size wrestlers anymore. Torito is looking for his tail, which got ripped off on Monday night. He dropkicks Mahal in the knee, sending him into the buckles. He then gores Mahal in the ass. Mahal chases him around, then avoids a springaboard headbutt. He hits an atomic drop, and Torito rolls to the apron. Mahal pulls him up to the top rope as the two teams are fighting outside. Back in, Torito hits a sunset flip powerbomb and follows up with the Bullsault (Double Jesus) for 3.
WINNER: El Torito.
Drew, Slater and Hornswoggle try to surround Torito. Los Matadores take care of Drew and Slater, leaving Hornswoggle in the ring. The Matadores stop him from leaving, and Torito chases him away with hedge clippers.
Paul Heyman is going to be on commentary for the next match.
MATCH 5-Champion vs. Champion: WWE United States Champion Sheamus vs. Intercontinental Champion Bad News Barrett (non-title)
Sheamus backs Barrett into the corner with a lock-up. Barrett pulls him back to the middle, where Sheamus applies a side headlock before hitting a shoulder off the ropes. Barrett comes back with a boot, then begins to lay in some punches in the corner. Sheamus comes back with a boot of his own, then reciprocates the corner punches. He rakes Barrett’s eyes, and Barrett comes back with a headbutt. Sheamus is whipped into the buckles and hits a clothesline off the rebound. He knee-chokes Barrett, then corner-whips him. Barrett blocks the charge with an elbow, then hits a tornado suplex. Sheamus rolls to the apron, where he hits a shoulderblock. He goes for the Ten Beats, but Barrett escapes and knocks Sheamus to the floor. He follows up with a flying elbow from the apron, then rolls Sheamus in for a 1-count. Barrett stomps Sheamus in the corner. Sheamus blocks a foot-choke and knocks Barrett backwards. Barrett gets corner whipped, and Sheamus catches him with a rolling fireman’s carry slam off the rebound. Barrett staggers, and Sheamus clotheslines him to the floor. Outside, Sheamus hits the Battering Ram off the apron. Barrett fights back, avoids a whip into the steps, then mule kicks the steps into Sheamus’ knees. Barrett knocks Sheamus down with a clothesline, then rolls back into the ring as we go to commercials.
Back from the break, Barrett has Sheamus in a rear chinlock. Sheamus headbutts his way out and nails a couple of punches. He ducks a clothesline and hits a pair of Irish Hammers, a running shoulder in the corner and a running kneelift. In the corner, Barrett blocks him with a knee to the face, then hits a thrust kick to the head for 2, making ADR cry because Barrett’s version is so much better. Sheamus recovers enough to hit the Irish Curse. Sheamus goes for the pin, but only gets 2. Barrett rolls to the apron, and Sheamus lays in the Ten Beats of the Bodhran. He picks Barrett up for White Noise, but Barrett escapes. He ducks a Brogue Kick attempt and catches Sheamus with the Winds of Change for 2. Barrett goes for the Wasteland, and Sheamus counters into a crucifix. He immediately lets go, and as Barrett gets back to his feet, Sheamus drops him with the Brogue Kick for 3.
WINNER: Sheamus. I think the wrong man went over here, but this was still a really fun match.
After the match, Sheamus grabs Heyman by the tie, and Heyman grovels before telling him good luck on Sunday.
Renee Young is with the Usos. They were defeated on Main Event by Luke Harper and Erick Rowan, then points out that Jey’s ribs are taped up. Jey says it’s nothing to worry about. It’s not the first time they’ve been beaten up, and it won’t be the last. Jimmy pipes in and says he’s got a Last Man Standing Match with Bray Wyatt tonight. Wyatt may have his family in his corner, but he’s got his brother. He’s going to show everyone what happens when you back an Uso into a corner.
We get video from 4 weeks ago on SmackDown, when Titus O’Neil got himself DQ’ed in a match with Big E, only to have E destroy him after the match.
MATCH 6: Titus O’Neil vs. Big E
E is facing Rusev this Sunday at Payback, and JBL says, “The Unstoppable Force vs. The Immovable Object, as Gorilla would say.” No, Gorilla said, “IRRESISTIBLE Force”. JBL, don’t quote Gorilla Monsoon until you can get it right. Or just don’t quote him at all. In fact, just shut up. Anyway, before the match starts, Lana comes and calls the American people a weak, trite civilization. There is a red, white and blue flag that represents power & glory, and the US will bow down to this flag. You will pay your reverence to the super athlete, Rusev. Rusev comes out, waving the Russian flag. E challenges him to come down the ring, and he starts to. That’s that’s when the bell rings, and Titus nails E from behind. He hits a big boot, then lays in some forearms in the corner. Titus hits an avalanche, but misses a second attempt. E ducks a clothesline and hits a belly-to-belly. E fires off some body blows in the corner, hits a running shoulder and a standing avalanche in the middle ring. The Warrior Splash connects, and the Big Ending gets 3.
WINNER: Big E. I really don’t understand Titus’ new gimmick. He attacks guys from behind and beats the hell out of them, only to get squashed moments later. What is the point?
MATCH 7: Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Colter) vs. Adam Rose
Colter is on commentary. Rose skips around the ring, sucking on a lollipop. Swagger goes for a lock-up, and Rose skips around some more. He offers the lollipop to Swagger, and Swagger knocks it down. He goes for Rose’s leg, and Rose skips around some more. Swagger applies a waistlock. Rose backs him to the corner. Swagger shoves him off and misses a clothesline. Rose dives into Swagger’s arms, hugging him in the process. Swagger lets go and heads to the outside to talk to Colter. He slides back in, and Rose slides out. Rose slides in as Swagger slides out. As Swagger gets back in, Rose hits a couple of kicks before falling on Swagger into a pin for 3.
WINNER: Adam Rose. I want to know who though this sh*t would be a good idea? This gimmick sucks something awful.
Wyatt nails a right and a headbutt. He hits an uppercut, then nails Jimmy across the back before hitting another uppercut. He rolls Jimmy to the middle of the ring and orders the ref to count. Jimmy’s up before 10, and Wyatt knocks him back down with a shoulderblock. He hits a gut shot, and Jimmy comes back with a jumping side kick, sending Wyatt to the apron. Jimmy hotshots Wyatt, knocking him to the floor. Jimmy drops him with a plancha, and the ref counts, getting to 5 before Wyatt gets to his feet, laughing as he does so. The two trade punches, with Jimmy getting the best of the exchange. He slams Wyatt face-first into the apron, then throws him into the barricade. Wyatt hits a kick to the gut and throws Jimmy into the barricade before declaring himself a god. Jimmy gets up at 5, so Wyatt pulls him around the ring and throws him into another part of the barricade. Jimmy’s up by 5 again, so Wyatt headbutts him and rolls him in the ring, where he hits a running senton. Jimmy is up at 6, and now Wyatt is choking him over the middle rope. Wyatt nails an uppercut in the corner, then connects with a big avalanche. Jimmy is up at 6 again, and he hits a mule kick. He hits an uppercut, but Wyatt no-sells and hits his own. He connects with some kneelifts in the corner, then drops Jimmy with a standing suplex. Jimmy’s up, and he tries a few rights before catching Wyatt off the ropes with a Samoan drop. The ref begins a double count, but both men are up by 5. Jimmy lands a kick in the corner. Wyatt comes back with a headbutt, but then gets low-bridged to the floor. Outside, Jimmy runs the barricade, dives over Wyatt’s head, lands on his feet and knocks Wyatt down with a superkick. Wyatt beats the count, and Jimmy rolls him back in. Wyatt ducks a clothesline and hits the running back elbow. Love that move. Wyatt crab-walks around for a moment, waits for Jimmy to get up, then attacks him in the corner while taunting Jey on the outside. Wyatt sets Jimmy up on the top rope and looks for a superplex. Jimmy blocks it, nails some punches, then knocks Wyatt down with a headbutt. Jimmy hits the Samoan Splash, and now the ref is counting. Wyatt makes it up at 8 and goes right back on the attack. Jimmy gets thrown to the floor, and Wyatt heads out, screaming for Jimmy to get up. Wyatt runs through Jimmy as the crowd starts to sing, then signals for a powerbomb. Jimmy escapes and nails a reverse dragon whip to the head. Jimmy hits the running hip bump against the barricade, and he nearly wins before Wyatt gets up at 9. Harper and Rowan attack Jey on the other side of the ring, only for Jimmy to knock both of them down. Wyatt charges, and Jimmy meets him with a superkick, knocking him into the ring steps. Jimmy goes for the hip bump again, but Wyatt moves out of the way, causing Jimmy to crash into them. Wyatt quickly lays Jimmy out with Sister Abigail, then hangs upside down from the ring as the ref counts to 10.
WINNER: Bray Wyatt.
End of show.
Not the best episode of SmackDown, but the main event was good, plus the fun brawl Barrett and Sheamus had. Even with the bad, it was a huge step up after having to watch Impact this week.
Dustin Nichols is a freelance writer, and you can keep track of all of his work on his Facebook page, which can be found at www.facebook.com/DustinNicholsWriter. Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out his mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:
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