This week opens up with Seth Rollins, sans the WWE World title belt. J&J Security are also noticeably absent. Rollins has a folding chair, which he stares at before saying nearly a year ago today, he took a chair not unlike this one, and he single-handedly dismantled the Shield. Rollins sits down in the chair and says since then, the question he’s gotten from everyone more than anything is why? Why did he take the chair and send a message to Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns? Why did he destroy what he created? From day one, he said his goal was to be the very best in the history of this industry. Not ONE OF the best; THE best. He was sick of sharing the spotlight with two chumps who were obviously beneath him. It was time to move on, and he was the only one with the guts to pull the trigger. So, he joined up with the Authority, and they anointed him the undisputed future of WWE. He validated that endorsement by winning the MITB contract all by himself. The best part is that he was only getting started. Shortly after the Royal Rumble, he had a vision. He had a vision to make history, to do the impossible, to beat Reigns and Brock Lesnar at the same time. Now, it’s one thing to come up with a plan like that. But to execute it flawlessly took courage, guts and the heart of a champion. At Wrestlemania, he ripped Reigns’ dreams from his hands and slayed the Beast at the same time. Now that beast is off licking his wounds while Reigns is living in Rollins’ shadow, trying to do everything Rollins has already done. Well, here’s some news, brother: the sequel is never as good as the original. So, here he stands, the greatest WWE World Champion of all time, and he’s got no championship around his waist. That brings him to Ambrose. Ambrose wants so desperately for everyone to think that stealing a title makes him a champion, but Ambrose knows that’s not true. Everyone knows who the rightful champion really is. That’s fine, because he doesn’t need a belt, anyone or anything to validate who he is and what he’s capable of. He appreciates everything the Authority has done for him. But he doesn’t need J&J, Kane, the Big Show, Stephanie McMahon or Triple H to destroy Ambrose. At MITB, his title will hang over the ring. He will climb the ladder and retrieve what he’s rightfully earned. And when it’s said and done…
Ambrose appears on the TitanTron, sitting under a ladder and holding the WWE title. He says he couldn’t help but hear Rollins say he does things all by himself. Does Rollins have bad memory, or is he just a liar? As far as he can remember, Rollins always needed help. He couldn’t go through a single airport without asking Ambrose or Reigns with help with his bags. He’s got more baggage than a rich girl with daddy issues. But Ambrose always knew Rollins was a liar, but who is he to judge? Ambrose is every bit the scumbag Rollins is. However, there’s one lie he can’t stand when he hears it, and that’s Rollins calling himself the WWE World Champion after Ambrose beat him at Elimination Chamber. Rollins can put on a show all he wants. We all know the Authority will do whatever they can to protect their investment. They’ll send monsters, demons, giants the cavalry, J&J, everything to make sure the WWE title never slips through their fingers. That helps Rollins sleep at night. It’s made him soft and weak. Rollins wants to talk about doing things by himself. Ambrose has spent the last year surviving. He’s had to grow eyes in the back of his head. Every time he steps in the ring, he’s had to watch his back. That puts him on the endangered species list, which only makes him stronger. Every day, he got stronger, and finally, he reached the top of the mountain at Elimination Chamber. To get there, you can’t be afraid to fall, and he’s never been afraid to fall. So, they’re going to do this one more time. This time, in a ladder match. Rollins wants the belt? He has to climb and take it. Ambrose is the real, rightful champion. He’s walking in to MITB with the belt, and he’s walking out with it, or he’ll die trying.
Tonight, Sheamus takes on Roman Reigns, and we also get the first ever Kevin Owens NXT Championship Open Challenge.
Young starts with Cara. Cara applies a waistlock and hits a takedown. Young comes back with an arm wringer before we get a series of reversals. The two go into a lock-up, and Cara applies a hammerlock. He tags in Kalisto, who snaps Young over. They hit a pair of kicks, then follow up with Cara wheelbarrowing Kalisto onto Young for 2. Kalisto hits a few strikes before Young nails a clothesline. He hits a cannonball off the ropes for 2, and Viktor tags himself in. He hits a fist drop on Kalisto before tagging in Konnor. We see the New Day looking on backstage. Meanwhile, Kalisto sends Konnor to the floor with a Tidal Crush, then low-bridges an incoming Viktor. Cara comes in, and the Lucha Dragons hit a pair of suicide dives. Commercials.
Back from the break, Konnor tosses Kalisto onto the top rope. Kalisto kicks him away, then kicks an incoming Viktor as well. Konnor recovers and hits Kalisto with an electric chair into a facebuster for 2. Vikto tags in and drops an elbow for 2. Konnor tags back in and hits a legdrop for 2. He applies a rear chinlock before tagging out to Viktor. Viktor hits a boot and a big chop, sending Kalisto to the corner. Viktor nails a forearm, then corner-whips Kalisto before running into a boot. Kalisto hits a headscissors from the middle rope, then crawls to Cara. Konnor blasts Cara on the apron, which allows Viktor to make the tag. They hit a double hiptoss into a release powerbomb for 2, only to have Young break it up. Konnor clubs him across the back and sends him to the floor, then goes for a suplex on Kalisto. Kalisto escapes with knees to the head, backflips off a back-body drop attempt and falls into a tag from Titus. Viktor tags in, and Titus floors him. He knocks Konnor off the apron, then nails Viktor with a big boot. He hits an avalanche and follows up with a big powerslam for 2, only to have Cara break it up with a swanton bomb. Young comes in and lays Cara out with the Gut Check. Konnor knocks Young to the floor, and then turns around into a big boot from Titus. Kalisto hits a springboard dive, but Titus catches him, then throws him at Konnor, knocking them both outside. Viktor rolls Titus up, but only gets 2. Titus hits a boot to the gut before connecting with a pumphandle powerslam for 3.
WINNERS AND NEW #1 CONTENDERS: THE PRIME-TIME PLAYERS.
To the best of my knowledge, this will be the first time the PTP have ever gotten a 2-on-2 match for the tag belts.
Renee Young is standing by with the New Day. Now that they know their opponents, how does their game plan going into the match change? Xavier Woods says their future at MITB is as bright as a morning sun rising on a new day. Step one: dispose of the PTP and their morally corrupt ways. Big E says all the PTP want is the money. Kofi Kingston says step two while their arms are raised high, they will listen to the fans celebrate, hands clapping as they say, “New Day rocks!” Woods says step three is Kofi walking into the MITB match and, through the power of positivity, walking out with the contract. Kane approaches them and says there’s a new game plan tonight. Kofi is taking on Neville one-on-one. Oh, and have a pleasant day.
MATCH 2: INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION RYBACK VS. STARDUST (NON-TITLE)
Another week, another jobber non-entrance for Stardust. The two lock up, and Stardust suckers Ryback into the corner before escaping. He repeats this, then slaps Ryback. He misses a clothesline and gets hit with an armdrag before running into a back elbow. Ryback sends him into the corner, but runs into a pair of boots. Ryback catches Stardust diving off the middle rope and goes for a powerslam, but Stardust counters into a diving inverted DDT for 2. Stardust stomps Ryback down and hits a low dropkick for 2. Stardust applies a cravat, but Ryback escapes and shoves him into the buckles. Ryback runs into an elbow, but then catches Stardust off the buckles with a spinebuster. The Meat Hook connects, and Shell Shocked is good for 3.
Renee Young is standing by with Paige, only they’re out on the stage instead of in the back. Young points out how Paige got screwed on RAW. She asks how Paige is feeling after the loss. Paige says it feels like it’s never going to change. It’s the same old, same old. The Bella Tw*ts have been pulling “twin magic” for years, and she’s sick of it. Me too, especially since only a dumbass couldn’t tell them apart at this point. The Bellas walks out here, smile for the cameras and act like they’re giving divas a chance. In reality, they’re holding the division back. They’ve been doing it since day one. They think the spotlight shines on them. Their whole lives are consumed with being celebrities. Paige’s life is consumed with the ring. She prides herself on being herself and being different. She’s never bought into the notion of if you “can’t beat them, join them”. She leans more towards “if you don’t like the world you live in, you have the power to change it”. So, she guesses she’ll have to change it. Thank you.
We see Luke Harper holding Erick Rowan’s sheep mask. He says we tried to fit into your world, but you rejected us. We don’t look like you, act like you, and we certainly don’t think like you. The camera pans over to show Rowan is there as well. He says they’re family. Harper says every single turn, you have closed the door on them. But the reapers are at your doorstep. And now, it is time to pay for your sins.
Guess that team is finally back together, which is good. Both guys were really going nowhere as singles wrestlers, especially Rowan. And no, Harper’s cup of coffee as IC Champion doesn’t count for much.
Kevin Owens makes way down to the ring. He says you will notice he doesn’t need Michael Cole this week, because after what he did on Sunday, everyone knows exactly who he is. He is the NXT Champion, Kevin Owens. He’s the guy who beat John Cena in his very first match in WWE. He’s also the guy who’s going to do the exact same thing in their rematch at MITB. Now, everyone knows who he is and what he’s about, except for Cena. Cena seems to think Owens is someone else. Cena thinks he’s some kid in a Cena hat and t-shirt who hangs onto every word he says, much like Owens’ son. But he’s only 7 and doesn’t know any better. He stood in the ring Monday night and listen to Cena go on and on and on. He looked into Cena’s eyes, heard the emotion in his voice, and he realized Cena is completely delusional. For years, he thought it was an act, but no. Cena actually believes this nonsense. And it doesn’t end there. You want to talk about him being delusional? Cena said Owens isn’t a real man. Owens can’t let his son be influenced by someone so out of touch with reality anymore. Hustle, Loyalty, Respect? Never Give Up? That’s not how it works in the real world. This fairy tale fantasy Cena has been force-feeding kids for the last ten years is absolute garbage. Someone needs to put an end to the corruption of our children’s minds by Cena, and Owens will proudly be the one to step up and do that in their rematch at MITB. He’s going to show the world what a real champion, a real role model and a real man is. That brings him to tonight and his open challenge. If there’s anyone back there who thinks they can beat the man that beat Cena on his first night, and will do it again at MITB, well, the champ is here! The NXT Open Challenge starts…oh, he’s not wearing a watch, so whatever. You want some? Come get some! Obviously, I can’t mimic Owens’ mocking of Cena with typing, but it was pretty funny.
MATCH 3-NXT CHAMPIONSHIP: KEVIN OWENS (CHAMPION) VS. ZACK RYDER
Owens boots Ryder and clubs him down. Ryder comes back with a facebuster off the ropes. Owens avoids an Irish whip and heads to the floor. Ryder follows, and Owens throws him into the barricade. Back in, Owens nails a boot and corner-whips Ryder. Ryder blocks the charge and hits a missile dropkick from the middle rope. He goes for a corner forearm, but Owens drops him with a superkick. Off the ropes, Owens hits the pop-up powerbomb for 3.
WINNER: KEVIN OWENS.
After the match, Ryder is slumped in the corner. Owens nails him with a cannonball, then hits another pop-up powerbomb.
Renee Young is now with Sheamus. She mentions his match with Roman Reigns tonight. People are saying Reigns is the favorite to win the MITB match. Sheamus takes exception to that, then points out how he destroyed Randy Orton on RAW. He plans on putting on another show tonight, then, in less than two weeks, he’s planning on climbing the ladder, grabbing the case and becoming the next WWE World Champion. What’s that thing Reigns always says? Oh, yeah. Believe that.
MATCH 3: NEVILLE VS. WWE TAG TEAM CO-CHAMPION KOFI KINGSTON (W/BIG E AND XAVIER WOODS)
Inset promo from Neville. He says he’s the fastest, most agile, and he doesn’t know fear. At MITB, don’t blink, because you might miss the “Man That Gravity Forgot” grabbing the contract. This is the start of the “Altitude Era”.
Kofi hits a boot and a European upperct, then sends Neville into the corner. Neville flips over and hits a cross-body from the middle rope before hitting a hurricanrana. Kofi hits a slide tackle off the ropes and drags Neville to the floor. He distracts the ref, which allows E to hit a vertical splash. Woods rolls him back in, which gets Kofi 2. Kofi boots Neville back to the floor as we go to commercials.
Back from the break, Kofi has Neville in a modified rear chinlock. Neville fights out, but Kofi hangs on with a handful of hair. He then pulls Neville back in and hits an inverted suplex for 2. Kofi backhands Neville across the face, which causes Neville to come back with a series of kicks. Neville throws Kofi into the buckles, nails a chop, then hits a seated dropkick from the middle rope. A standing moonsault gets 2. Kofi suckers him into the middle buckle, then charges in the corner. Neville catches him, drops him, then nails a tornado DDT. Neville calls for the Red Arrow, but E pulls Kofi to the floor. Neville changes positions and takes them both out with a moonsault, landing on his feet in the process. Woods tries to trip him on the way back into the ring, but Neville avoids it and slingshots himself back into the ring. Kofi looks for a quick roll-up, but Neville reverses for 2. He gets sent into the ropes, where Woods is waiting on the apron. Neville blasts him, only to have Kofi try to roll Neville up again for 2. Neville twists himself around, sits across Kofi’s chest and cradles both legs to get 3.
We see the Miz getting makeup put on. My feed quick-cuts to “MizTV”, already in progress. He’s with Lana, and is basically calling her a waste of space. He blathers on about her cutting Rusev as a business decision. She said she did care for him, but his behavior, lies and hateful words forced her to do what she did. As for Miz, his questions are leading to two options: she’ll leave, or she’ll slap Miz. Miz, looking douchier than usual, says there are always two sides to every story. To get the other side, he has a surprise guest, that being Rusev himself.
Rusev comes out on crutches, in a walking cast. He hobbles his way into the ring and says he’s not here to pick a fight or start trouble. He’s here as a broken man. He knows he’s called her so many bad things. He has no excuse except that he was raised differently. He really thought he didn’t need Lana, but as her favorite American song goes, you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone. This country has embraced Lana, and is all about giving second chances. That’s all he’s asking for as well. Without his crutches, he can’t walk or stand, and he’s begging for one more chance. He’ll always lean to her. He wants her to be his crutch. Lana picks up his crutches, looks at his foot and says she’ll show him where to put his crutch. He calls her a stupid cow and nearly calls her a b*tch before Dolph Ziggler comes down to the ring. Lana hooks onto Ziggler’s arm, and the two leave together.
They lock up and proceed to jockey for position until Sheamus breaks it. Reigns applies a side headlock, then hits a shoulder off the ropes before clutching his ribs. He shakes it off and hits a few punches before Sheamus nails a kitchen sink, sending Reigns to the floor. Sheamus follows, onlty to have Reigns nail him with a clothesline. Reigns picks him up, but gets rammed into the apron before getting pancaked across the announce desk. Sheamus hurls him over the desk, then rips up part of the desk as we go to commercials.
Back from the break, Sheamus is driving his knee into Reigns’ ribs. He hits a forearm to the face for 2, then applies a rear chinlock. Reigns fights out before Sheamus corner-whips him. Sheamus runs into a boot in the corner, but then catches Reigns in a rolling fireman’s carry slam for 2. Sheamus hits a gut shot and tosses Reigns to the apron, where he looks for the 10 Beats of the Bodhran after a few shots to the ribs. Reigns manages to break free and nail a few forearms, followed by a hotshot. He nails Sheamus with a series of punches while Sheamus is draped across the bottom rope. He goes for the apron kick, but Sheamus moves. He kicks Reigns in the ribs under the bottom rope, then pulls him back in. The two trade shots until Sheamus throws Reigns to the corner. He hits a running shoulder thrust, but misses a second one, colliding with the ring post. Sheamus winds up on the floor, manages to recover and looks to wrap Reigns’ leg around the ring post. Reigns pulls his leg in, sending Sheamus’ face into the post. Sheamus rolls back in and Reigns nails him with a clothesline. He hits one more, then explodes with a third off the ropes. He hits a series of corner clotheslines, but then eats a big boot. Sheamus charges in, and Reigns catches him in a fireman’s carry. Sheamus escapes and boots Reigns to the floor. As Sheamus heads out, Reigns trips him on the apron, then nails his big kick. Back in the ring, Reigns hits a Samoan drop and calls for the Superman Punch. Kane’s music hits, and he comes out, flanked by J&J Security. They march down to the ring, and the distraction allows Sheamus to roll Reigns up for 2. Sheamus hits the Irish Curse for another 2, then goes for the Brogue Kick. Reigns avoids it and nails a Superman Punch. He pulls himself up in the corner, and that’s when Kane enters the ring. He nails Reigns with a big boot, leading to the DQ.
WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: ROMAN REIGNS.
After the match, Kane looks for a chokeslam. Reigns fights his way out, but then gets dropped with a Brogue Kick as J&J cheer at ringside. Kane then puts Sheamus down with a chokeslam. He looks up at the MITB briefcase then…you guessed it…announces himself as the final participant in the MITB match. Big f*cking surprise. Reigns gets up, turns around and walks right into a chokeslam.
End of show.