WWE | Pro Wrestling

Chavo Guerrero, The Phony Maverick

Chavo GuerreroIf there’s one thing I hate more than wrestlers who claim that their Twitter misspeak stems from having their account compromised, it’s wrestlers who talk big, but only speak with nerve once they’re unemployed.

The most recent example of this el-oh-ellery comes from Chavo Guerrero, once a respected and gifted midcard wrestler who has spent the last month or so being unemployed for the first time in about fifteen years (at least, from mainstream American promotions). Perhaps the world of not having a steady paycheck is giving the “Mexican Warrior” a serious case of culture shock, because his coping mechanism seems to be getting bitten in the a%# by the “bitter Twitter” bug.

Now that’s he’s gotten indignities like losing four hundred straight “comedy” matches to Hornswoggle out of the way, not to mention playing third banana while his widowed aunt made out with Edge, you’d think Chavo would want to maintain real dignity, even if the character he’s played on TV hasn’t.

Well, you’d be wrong.

Far be it from me to criticize someone for speaking their mind, let alone a man that has taken many painful falls during his long career, but Chavo Guerrero is coming off less like an enlightened elder, and more like a whining brat that hasn’t the slightest clue how to cope with newfound reality.

Recently, Chavo took to Twitter, as many ex-wrestlers do once prospects dry up, to criticize then-WWE Champion John Cena for going through the motions in his matches, and not wrestling up to the caliber that a WWE Champion, and mainstream star, should.

For your amusement, here now are the ramblings of a forty year old man (keep that age in mind when reading) against the top talent of the company that signed his checks for ten years.

Ok, don’t “Fin” say that ppl will talk about this for years if you’re going to let Punk do all the work and not deliver at the PPV, Cena. I am tired and I know fans are tired of WWE Superstars talking big and not delivering. We don’t want to see some1 just in a fight. And frankly no1 believes it anymore. If Miz can kick your a** then the clerk at the store can kick your a**, so plz deliver if u say that..Ppl will remember this PPV. U know Punk will bring “it”. I’ve been in the ring with both of u & Punk has “it”. Cena u have mic skills yes,. But if u think ppl believe your BS lazy comeback that u do exactly the same every match then u are mistaken.

Man, the autocheck on my Microsoft Word is having heart palpitations.

Uhh, where do we begin with Chavito’s rant?

I think I’ll start with the lineI am tired and I know fans are tired of WWE Superstars talking big and not delivering“, because I can think of a superstar that disappointed me once. His name is Chavo Guerrero, and he disappointed me in the summer of 2007 by getting busted on a clientele list of an online pharmacy.

That’s right, Chavo Guerrero, this so called voice of the disenfranchised fanbase, received shipments of three kinds of drugs: nandrolone (an anabolic steroid), somatropin (growth hormone), and anastrozole (a woman’s drug used in men’s steroid cycles to release excess estrogens).

Now, this should be no surprise, since growth hormone and wrestling go together like peanut butter and jelly, but we should also remember that Chavo lost his uncle to heart failure, which can be caused by abuse of growth hormones and steroids.

You may remember that uncle. He was only 38 years old, and his name was Eddie Guerrero.

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Chavo received his shipments of these drugs up until May of 2006, so said Sports Illustrated, which means he was getting illegal, cosmetically-enhancing drugs up to six months after his uncle dropped dead in a hotel room, leaving behind three children.

Because when I want somebody’s opinion on John Cena’s work ethic, I’m going to listen to a forty year old drug junkie that didn’t know that a relative dropping dead young was the right time to quit.

Hey, Chavo’s free to his opinion, but he’s going about it in such a way that makes it hard to take him seriously. All I’m doing is shading his background in a bit for people who think he’s some kind of Twitter messiah.

It’s also funny how Chavo didn’t begin his barrage of hate against John Cena until he was released. From the time Cena became a World Champion in 2005, he’s largely used the same routine and style in his matches, sure, but where was Chavo to complain then?

Oh, right, he was working as Kerwin White, or as Chavo, keeping these apparent renegade feelings quiet while he picked up a paycheck every week or two.

There’s nothing wrong with biting your lip to prevent your employer from firing you for being ungrateful, but exploding after you ARE released just makes you look like a phony. Shane Helms could have called out Shawn Michaels while they were co-workers, but he didn’t.

Because he’s gutless. And Chavo seems to be the same way.

It’s not just Cena, either. Guerrero ranted the weekend of his release about how he was tired of putting people over, and how WWE used he and Eddie basically as mules to carry lesser talents, and then lose to them.

Funny, I never heard Chavo say this when he was getting paid to have a leprechaun kick his ass.

And now Chavo has a cousin, Eddie’s daughter Shaul, working in developmental. I wish her well, because the business hasn’t been 100% kind to her Guerrero predecessors. But I sincerely hope that, when all is said and done, she’s not a forty year old who panders to people she’s never met outside of Twitter, gladhanding for support while ripping the WWE Champion, and ONLY after she no longer works for the company. I also hope that she avoids the same mistakes her father made, because her cousin apparently didn’t know better.

If Chavo ends up reading this, I hope he puts an end to the crap. Stop ranting on Twitter to make yourself feel better about not making it as big as others, and do something productive with your life. You’re forty years old, and should really be setting a better example, especially for Shaul and anyone else that would look up to you as a role model.

And maybe Chavo should avoid Twitter. Something tells me that if Eddie Guerrero had Twitter, he’d laud praise on Cena and CM Punk for their match at Money in the Bank, and not continue to make a fool of himself.

Grow up, Chavo. You’re supposed to be better than this.

Justin Henry is a freelance writer whose work appears on many websites. He provides wrestling, NFL, and other sports/pop culture columns for CamelClutchBlog.com, as well as several wrestling columns a week for WrestlingNewsSource.com and WrestleCrap.com. Justin can be found here on Facebook – http://www.facebook.com/notoriousjrh and Twitter- http://www.twitter.com/cynicjrh.

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Eric G.

Eric is the owner and editor-in-chief of the Camel Clutch Blog. Eric has worked in the pro wrestling industry since 1995 as a ring announcer in ECW and a commentator/host on television, PPV, and home video. Eric also hosted Pro Wrestling Radio on terrestrial radio from 1998-2009. Check out some of Eric’s work on his IMDB bio and Wikipedia. Eric has an MBA from Temple University’s Fox School of Business.

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