This week’s WWE Friday Night SmackDown opens with yet another thrilling episode of MizTV. At this point, I am convinced Vince McMahon hates me. He brings out his first guest, that being the Big Show. His second guest is Dolph Ziggler. Miz says they all stood on the stage with 40 other WWE stars when Daniel Bryan was forced into a gauntlet match against the Shield and was beaten up by them, as well as Randy Orton while no one was allowed to interfere. Miz says they were told they had to just sit by and watch, and if anyone interfered, they would be fired from WWE. This is a free country, and it’s time the WWE Universe heard their opinions on the way management is running WWE. Show is up first, and said watching Bryan get destroyed was tough, then tells Miz to talk to Dolph instead. Ziggler says Show can go ahead and finish his thought. Miz says he has always been outspoken, and he’s been called a big mouth…
Triple H interrupts things, coming out to “The King of Kings”, because he needs two entrance themes, you know. Trips asks what Miz was about to say before his music hit. Miz doesn’t respond. Trips asks why Miz is in his gear tonight instead of a suit. Miz says you never know when a fight will break out. He asks if he can ask a question, and Trips says no. He’s not sure why everyone wants to make this personal. This is just business, yet everyone wants to go the Daniel Bryan route and make this personal. A “You sold out” chant breaks out, because these fans are apparently morons. Trips thought these guys would get what’s going on. He calls Randy Orton the future of WWE. He can back up his mouth, and, looking at Ziggler, calls Orton “big enough”. Orton is what’s best for business. He gets better ratings and makes more money for everyone. He doesn’t understand why these three are so angry. Miz is angry because he used to be WWE Champion and hasn’t been anywhere near it since. Trips says he’s a good guy and is fair, so he’s going to give Miz a shot at Orton tonight. Ziggler looked miserable on the stage, and that’s because he got the crap beaten out of him the last time he was in the ring with the Shield. He’ll have an opportunity for revenge tonight as he faces the Shield in a handicap match. As for Show, Trips orders him to stand right in front of him. On Monday night, if looks could kill…you could see the smoke come out of Show’s ears. It was frightening, so he’s going to do Show a favor and give him the night. In fact, Show will sit at ringside the rest of the night and watch every single thing that happens in the ring tonight, and will do absolutely nothing about anything that happens. Show takes his seat, and Trips tells Ziggler to run to the back to get ready. As for Miz, it’s fortuitous that Miz has his gear on, because his match is right now.
Lock-up starts the match, and Orton backs Miz into the corner before giving a clean break. Another lock-up, and Orton goes for a side headlock before shouldering Miz off the ropes. Another lock-up, and Orton breaks it with a kneelift before throwing Miz to the corner. Miz counters a whip and comes off the ropes with a clothesline, followed by an atomic drop. He goes for the figure-4, but Orton kicks him off. Another lock-up, and now Miz goes to the headlock. Orton counters into his own by pulling the hair, then hits a couple of strikes. Miz ducks a clothesline and goes for the Reality Check, but Orton breaks free and hits a dropkick for 2. Orton throws Miz to the floor, then hits a back suplex across the barricade. Back in the ring, Orton covers Miz for 2, then applies a rear chinlock. Miz elbows out, then headbutts Orton into the corner, where he unloads with lefts before connecting with the hanging clothesline. Miz goes to the top rope, and Orton blocks a double axe-handle with a kick. He goes for the suspended DDT, but Miz backdrops him to the floor. We hear the Shield’s music hit at this point. Commercials.
Yet another video for 3MB airs.
Back from the break, Orton is in control on the outside, dropping Miz with a clothesline. He throws Miz back into the ring for a cover, getting 2. Orton hits some forearms to the chest, then proceeds with the Garvin Stomp and a jumping kneedrop for 2. Orton goes back to the rear chinlock as this match is putting me in a coma. Orton hits a knee to the gut and goes for a back suplex, but Miz escapes, ducks a clothesline, hits his own, follows up with a running kneelift and the Reality Check for 2. He calls for the SKF, but Orton armdrags out it and throws Miz to the apron for the suspended DDT, which connects. He signals for the RKO, but Miz counters with a backslide for 2. Miz follows up with a seated dropkick to the knee and a leg stunner out of the corner before applying the figure-4 (and a sh*tty one at that). Orton manages to get to the ropes and rolls to the apron. Miz tries to bring him back in, but gets a hot shot. Orton comes back in, connects with the RKO and gets 3.
WINNER: Randy Orton. After the match, Orton looks at the Shield and tells them to get in the ring, where they triple-team Miz. Daniel Bryan runs down with a chair and nails all four heels, chasing them off.
We get a video for Los Matadores, aka Primo and Epico.
Vickie Guerrero is in her office with Daniel Bryan. She tells Bryan this won’t happen on her show. Triple H doesn’t want him as the face of WWE, and she doesn’t want to see his face. Bryan was a bully out there, and he who bullies gets bullied back. We see that Ryback is also in her office. He calls Bryan “little fella” and says he can’t stand bullies. See you out there, shrimp.
MATCH 2: Rob Van Dam (w/Ricardo Rodriguez) vs. Damien Sandow
Sandow says what happens in Las Vegas will not stay in Las Vegas. He plans to amass victory over victory until the World Champion is his. He is your uncrowned World Champion, and his coronation will occur when he cashes in his briefcase. You’re welcome. RVD immediately hits a superkick for 2. He follows up with a spinning heel kick in the corner and a split-legged moonsault for another 2. Sandow blocks a corner whip with a kneelift before throwing RVD shoulder-first into the ring post for 2. Sandow hits some more kneelifts and a side-Russian legsweep. He connects with the Cubito Aequet, then begins driving his knee into RVD’s back before applying a rear chinlock. RVD elbows out, ducks a clothesline and snaps off a hurricanrana. Sandow recovers and hits a big boot. RVD blocks a throw to the corner with a high kick to the head. He crotches Sandow across the top rope and drops him with a thrust kick from the top. RVD goes to the top once more and connects with the Five-Star Frog Splash for 3.
WINNER: Rob Van Dam. Alberto Del Rio comes out after the match and says RVD is the #1 contender for the World title, but only got the opportunity because of Ricardo Rodriguez. Ricardo betrayed him, as well as the all of the Latinos. RVD should remember that when he sleeps with a dog, he gets fleas. RVD might have Rolling Thunder, but ADR will make it rain all over his parade. At Night of Champions, RVD will see who the real champion is.
A video for Damien Sandow airs.
MATCH 3-3-on-1 Handicap Match: The Shield (WWE United States Champion Dean Ambrose, and WWE Tag Team Champions Roman Reigns & Seth Rollins) vs. Dolph Ziggler
Rollins starts for the Shield, and Ziggler ducks a clothesline before attacking the other two members. He hits Rollins with some rights, ducks another clothesline and hits a cross-body. Ambrose distracts Ziggler, which allow Rollins to nail him from behind. Rollins stomps Ziggler in the corner and tags in Reigns. Ziggler tries to fight back, but is cut off by a kneelift to the gut. Reigns throws Ziggler to the corner, and Ziggler counters a charge with an elbow before running into a Samoan drop for 2. Ambrose tags in and headbutts Ziggler before grinding his forearm across Ziggler’s face. He stomps Ziggler’s left hand, then sends him hard into the corner. Ambrose fires off a right, then chops Ziggler across the chest before sending him into the opposite corner. Ziggler slaps Ambrose, then backdrops him to the floor. Ambrose gets back in and tags Rollins, who goes for a pin. Ziggler counters into a roll-up for 2, then sends Rollins into the ropes. He hits a boot and goes for the rocker dropper, but Rollins counters into a powerbomb in the corner. Reigns makes a quick tag and runs through Ziggler with a spear, getting the 3.
WINNERS: The Shield. After the match, Ambrose chokes Ziggler over the middle rope as the trio taunts Show to get in the ring. Rollins pulls Ziggler back to the middle, where they hit the triple powerbomb.
Curtis Axel and Paul Heyman make their way down to the ring. Axel says that, this past Monday night, the WWE Universe witnessed his mentor and hero, Paul Heyman, perform one of the bravest acts a man can ever muster up the courage to perform. We see the video from Monday night, where Heyman repeatedly caned CM Punk in the gut as he was handcuffed. Heyman then caned Punk across the back until the cane broke. Heyman asks the crowd what they want from him. Do they expect him to feel guilty about the beating he gave to his prodigal son, CM Punk? He’s not seeking forgiveness. He’s not here to atone. He’s not sorry for his actions. The fans voted him into a situation where he had to face a beating at the hands of Punk. What in the world did you expect him to do? Did you think for one second he’d take his beating like a man? Think about something: for 434 consecutive days, he and CM Punk were the reigning WWE Champion. Every single challenger was put down like a rabid dog. His strategy, Punk’s implementation. So, if all of those challengers were put down, why is Heyman still breathing when Punk is coming after him? Here’s why. Every time he’s come after Heyman, Punk has ended up on his back, looking up at his mentor, father figure, and the man he should be worshipping as the god Heyman is. You want a reason to boo? At Night of Champions, a handicap elimination match: CM Punk vs. Curtis Axel and Paul Heyman. This time, Heyman can’t escape and face his beating like a man. This time, WWE virtually guarantees that, at NoC, you will see Heyman suffer a beating at the hands of Punk. He tells Axel that he is truthfully afraid. He’s man enough to admit he’s scared out of his mind, because if Punk gets his hands on Heyman, you’ll never see Paul Heyman again. But Heyman’s fear can be Punk’s worst enemy. If he’s done this to Punk out of fatherly love, imagine what he’s capable of when face-to-face with a guaranteed beating. Ladies and gentlemen, his name is Paul Heyman, and at NoC, Axel and himself will own CM Punk.
MATCH 4: Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay and Sweet T, w/the Funkadactyls) vs. Luke Harper and Eric Rowan (w/Bray Wyatt)
Harper and T start the match. Harper immediately backs T into the corner and hits a European uppercut. T comes back with a clothesline and knocks Rowan off the apron. Clay makes sure Rowan stays down as T hits an avalanche. The two then hit a double shoulderblock and go for a double splash, but Rowan pulls Clay to the floor and throws him into the barricade. Harper knocks T down with a big boot and hits an avalanche in the corner. Rowan tags in and hits a running splash for 3.
WINNERS: Luke Harper and Eric Rowan. Wyatt then comes into the ring and hits T with Sister Abigail.
We see a video for Ryback, followed by another video for Los Matadores.
MATCH 5: Ryback vs. Daniel Bryan
Bryan immediately attacks Ryback in the corner with punches. Ryback shoves him away and moves to the adjacent corner, where Bryan recovers and lands a series of kicks. Ryback shoves him off once more and catches Bryan charging in, hitting a spinning over-the-shoulder powerslam. Ryback throws Bryan into the middle turnbuckle, then whips him sternum-first into the opposite corner. Bryan pulls himself back up, and is met with a running shoulder thrust for 2. Ryback steps on Bryan’s face, then forearms him in the back. Ryback hits a forearm to the face, then headbutts Bryan in the corner. Bryan avoids a charge, sending Ryback shoulder-first into the ring post. Bryan hits a running seated dropkick in the corner, followed by another. Ryback slumps down in the corner, and Bryan hits another dropkick, sending him to the floor. Bryan follows up with a suicide dive that knocks Ryback into the announce desk. We see Randy Orton making his way to ringside now, and Bryan sees him. The distraction is enough for Ryback to nail Bryan from behind. Commercials.
WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: Daniel Bryan. Bryan sees Orton coming and hooks him in the Yes! Lock, holding him there until the Shield run in and beat Bryan down. The Big Show enters the ring and stands over Bryan as the Shield and Orton back off. Triple H marches down to ringside and orders Show to get out of the ring. Show is fuming, but does what he’s told. He climbs out of the ring, stands face-to-face with Trips, then heads to the back. Guess he forgot all about his “iron-clad” contract, eh? He and Trips stop at the top of the ramp and look back at the ring, and Show finally heads to the back. Trips then orders Orton and the Shield to finish the job on Bryan. The Shield triple-team Bryan before picking him up for Orton. Orton knocks Bryan down with a punch, then boots him in the gut before slamming his head into the mat. The Shield pick Bryan up once more, and Orton nails him with a series of rights. One more pick-up, and Orton drops Bryan with an uppercut. Guess Orton forgot about his feud with the Shield, eh? Now, the Shield hit the triple powerbomb on Bryan. Orton grabs a can of spray paint and sprays “NO” on Bryan’s chest.
Dustin Nichols is a freelance writer, and you can keep track of all of his work on his Facebook page, which can be found at www.facebook.com/DustinNicholsWriter. Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out his mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:
[amazon_link id=”B00DBPBQB8″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]WWE: Summerslam 2013 DVD[/amazon_link]
[amazon_link id=”B00CS7PJY0″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ] The Best of WWE at Madison Square Garden[/amazon_link]