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WWE SmackDown Results and May 21 Recap

May 23, 2015 By: Category: Videos, WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week’s episode opens with Roman Reigns making his way down to the ring. He says he has a bit of bad news: he didn’t win at Payback. But, he has some good news: he had a really good time at Payback. Any time you punch Seth Rollins in the mouth, it’s a good time. The Shield hit a triple powerbomb and blew the roof off the joint, and he got to go toe-to-toe with his boy, Dean Ambrose. The fact is, he can chase Rollins all he wants, but it won’t be a fair fight. By next week, he’ll probably have 50 more little security guards. While Reigns is fine with punching them all, sometimes, you have to think with your head and not your fists. It’s a new game plan now, as he’s entering the Money in the Bank match, and he’s going to win. You can believe that.

Dean Ambrose heads down to the ring. He apologizes for interrupting, but when he heard Payback, his ears started burning. So he looked for a bucket of ice to dunk his head into, but took a wrong turn at catering, and here he is. But before he came out, he heard something about MITB. He thought about the violence, which he loves. Then he remembered that this year, he won’t be reaching for an opportunity to become WWE World Champion, because by then, he’ll already be champion. Reigns says he hopes so, and he respects Ambrose outsmarting Rollins for a title shot, but for once, just once, would Ambrose please think of an exit strategy.

This prompts Kane to come out onto the stage. He can’t believe he’s about to say this, but he agrees with Reigns. Ambrose’s exit strategy ended with Rollins giving him a Pedigree. He may have gotten one over on the Authority, but in the end, the Authority always wins. Reigns asks how Kane could know that, since he’s always on his back. Kane says that, as far as he’s concerned, Reigns is not in the MITB match. This is not a personal bias; it’s based on fact. Reigns lost at Wrestlemania. He lost at Payback. The only thing Reigns has earned is his spot at the back of the line. The only way he’ll get another title match is proving he deserves it to Kane. Ambrose calls Kane a Justin Bieber groupie. Kane used to be a “brother of destruction”. Now he’s the redheaded stepchild of the Authority. When Triple H and Steph feed him the scraps from the table, does he get to use a fork and knife, or does he eat from a bowl like the lapdog he is? Kane gets pissy and says to not mention his “family” in any way ever again. Ambrose has a hard time listening, so maybe he’ll get this: tonight, Ambrose gets a RAW rematch with Bray Wyatt. Ambrose is happy about that, and he’s going to take care of Wyatt tonight. Kane then tells Reigns he has no plans for Reigns tonight. In fact, Reigns should reflect on his failures tonight. He needs to turn inward, and find ways to grow as a complete superstar. Enjoy the night off. Reigns thanks him. He’ll take a cheat day, fill a plate with Chesapeake crab cakes and cheesecake. But, he’ll still watch the show and make sure Kane does everything that is best for business, and Kane can believe that.

The Prime-Time Players and the New Day are on commentary for the next match.

MATCH 1-FOUR CORNERS TAG TEAM MATCH: LOS MATADORES (DIEGO AND FERNANDO, W/EL TORITO) VS. THE ASCENSION (KONNOR AND VIKTOR) VS. CESARO AND TYSON KIDD (W/NATALYA) VS. THE LUCHA DRAGONS (KALISTO AND SIN CARA)
Kidd and Cara start with a lock-up. Kidd applies an arm wringer. Cara counters and goes for a Gory Special into a pin for 1. He then turns it into a submission, only to have Kidd reverse into a sunset flip for 2. He hits an armdrag into an armbar, only to have Cara tag out to Viktor. Viktor beats Kidd down, only to have Fernando make a blind tag. Kidd trips him and goes for the Sharpshooter, but Torito jumps on the apron for a distraction. Nattie puts a stop to that by grabbing him and lugging him on her shoulders, only to have him spin out and sunset flip her on the floor. In the ring, Fernando kicks Kidd in the back, sending him into the ropes. Diego tags in and cannonballs onto Kidd’s back. Konnor tags himself in, and he hits Kidd with a powerbomb into a DDT. Commercials.

Back from the break, Kidd is fighting out of a rear chinlock, only to have Konnor club him down. Konnor knocks Cesaro off the apron. Moments later, Kidd falls into a tag from Cara, who hits Konnor with a springboard somersault plancha. Cara ducks a clothesline and hits a springaboard cross-body for 2. Konnor boots him and sends him into the corner. Cara boots him away, hits Viktor, then takes Konnor down with a twisting armdrag from the middle rope. He follows up with a handspring elbow, then goes for a lionsault. Konnor blocks it with his knees and tags in Viktor, who stomps Cara down. Konnor back in, and the two hit a double powerbomb. Viktor back in, and he stomps Cara for 2 as Kalisto breaks it up. Viktor hits Kalisto with a falling tigerbomb, then talks trash to Los Matadores, only to have one tag himself in. He covers Kalisto, even though he’s not legal. Viktor pulls the Matador off, and the two of them argue before fists start flying. Their respective partners hit the ring and continue the brawl. Viktor takes a Matador out with a running STO as Konnor and the other Matador spill to the floor. Apparently, during the shoving match between Viktor and the Matador, a tag was made, making Viktor legal again. He sends Cara in for an Irish whip, only to have Cara backflip off a back-body drop attempt and tag in Cesaro. Cesaro nails an overhead belly-to-belly, then hits his series of corner European uppercuts. He calls for the Cesaro Swing, hits a spinebuster, then goes into the Swing in order to set up Montezuma’s Revenge by Kidd, who apparently tagged in at some point. Diego makes a blind tag off Kidd and throws him to the floor, then covers Viktor for 2, only to have Cesaro break it up with a double stomp. Konnor then nails Cesaro and sends him to the floor, only to have Fernando send him out with a hurricanrana. Diego is back up as Viktor tags out to Kalisto, who hits a springboard cross-body. He dropkicks Diego in the knee, then drives his head into the mat off a hurricanrana for 2, only to have Konnor break it up. Konnor grabs Fernando and throws him to the floor as Kidd comes back in the ring. He ducks a Konnor clothesline and hits a somersault plancha on Fernando, who is on the floor on the opposite side. Cesaro comes in and clotheslines Konnor to the floor, only to turn around into Kalisto tossing Cara onto him with a flying dropkick. Cara heads up top and hits a corkscrew plancha, wiping out everyone. Diego sneaks back in and rolls Kalisto up for 2 and goes for a catapult. Kalisto lands on his feet on the middle rope and hits a blind hurricanrana into a roll-up for 3.

WINNERS: THE LUCHA DRAGONS.

I don’t think I’ve seen a blind hurricanrana like that since Jonny Storm’s Rewind.

After some video of what happened between Rusev and Dolph Ziggler on RAW, Renee Young is standing by with Ziggler. She asks for Ziggler’s reaction to what we just saw. He says it’s been a hell of a week. He got busted open at Payback. On RAW, after he was told he’s in the Elimination Chamber match for the IC title, Lana kissed him, only to have Rusev come out and assault him. He’s no stranger to women kissing him, but this is the first time he’ll be locked in a steel structure with the ex-boyfriend. Tonight, he faces another one of his EC opponents, King Barrett. It’s the week that keeps on giving. Lana walks up, and she wishes him good luck before saying she’ll be watching. Ziggler asks Young to leave. He says he knows what Lana was doing on RAW. He knows she was just trying to make Rusev jealous. Rusev needs to respect women. He knows the game she’s playing though, and he’s fine with it. She’s not too bad of a kisser, either.

MATCH 2: KING BARRETT VS. DOLPH ZIGGLER
My feed goes to commercial, and when it comes back, the match has already started, with Ziggler in a rear chinlock. Ziggler fights out and nails Barrett with a right cross before planting a dropkick. He misses a corner splash, then turns around into the Wasteland for 2. Barrett complains about the count as Ziggler rolls to the floor. Barrett heads out and rams Ziggler back-first into the apron. He then launches Ziggler into the barricade by the timekeeper’s area before slamming him face-first into the announce desk. He rolls Ziggler in before taunting Jerry Lawler at ringside. Back in, Ziggler sneaks in a stack-up pin for 2. Barrett comes back with a pair of mule kicks, the last one to the face, for 2. Barrett calls for the Bull Hammer, but Ziggler superkicks him in the arm. He goes for the leaping DDT, only to have Barrett toss him face-first onto the mat. He goes for the Bull Hammer, but Ziggler ducks and drops him with a Zig-Zag for 3.

WINNER: DOLPH ZIGGLER.

Lana comes out and applauds Ziggler from the stage. She’s wearing less makeup, which is actually a huge improvement.

Paige heads down to the ring, and says it’s so good to be back. Last time she saw the fans, she was in her, and I quote, “hometown of England, in London”, in front of her friends and family, in a divas battle royal for a title match, which she won. That was one of the best moments of her career, but her triumph was short-lived. We go to the footage from said match, where Naomi attacked her after it was over and put her on the shelf. Back to the arena, Paige says that’s when Naomi finally became relevant. You’re welcome, pumpkin. She has a weird admiration for Naomi because she took what she wanted. Paige has done that countless times. On the way, Naomi found herself a “boyfriend” in Tamina. She then says Tamina is int he wrong division. Moving on, she’s fully recovered and despite her admiration for Naomi, she took what is Paige’s. This is her division, the Divas title is her title, and the ring is her house.

Naomi and Tamina come down to the ring. Naomi laughs and says she must’ve hit Paige harder than she thought. Paige doesn’t understand where she is in the pecking order. Someone like Naomi, with all of her qualities, deserves to be the top diva, not someone who’s made a career out of screaming, which is all Paige is good at. She doesn’t know what it’s like to struggle and be overlooked by the same people she’s trying to impress. Paige got a title shot on day one. She didn’t earn it, and she damn sure didn’t deserve it. Paige hasn’t been here as long as Naomi has, but this is how things work: you can’t wait for opportunities; you have to take them. Naomi is doing that right now. Paige had an opportunity, and someone better took it from her. Don’t take it personally; Naomi simply removed her from the equation. Paige says taking an opportunity is exactly what she did. In one year, she did more than either Naomi or Tamina in their long, dinosaur careers. There’s more to being a diva than athleticism. You also have to have opportunity, which Naomi lacks. What she doesn’t lack, however, is excuses. Shut up, get over and get over yourself. Naomi starts screaming and says she’s about to run over Paige and everyone else who gets in her way. This is Paige’s house? Naomi and Tamina are about to clean house. They jump on the apron, only to have Paige attack both of them. Eventually, they’re able to double-team her and beat her down, which leads to Nikki Bella “running” down to the ring and chasing them off. She then goes after them outside, only to fall from the ring onto her stupid face. She grabs Naomi by the foot and manages to throw her into the ring, where Paige drops her with a side kick. Nikki tries to climb in, but Tamina pulls her back down. Nikki fights her off as Paige goes for the Ram-Paige on Naomi. Nikki enters the ring and hits Paige with a forearm to the face at the same time, then hits her with the Rack Attack.

Bray Wyatt appears on the screen and says not too long ago, people used to treat these so-called lunatics as if they were evil. Some would go as far as to claim perhaps they were possessed by demons. Nowadays, these claims are looked down upon, as if they were primitive and outrageous. Here’s the thing: they were right. Demons are all around us and exist in us all. Tonight, he will prove to Dean Ambrose he has his inner demons, but they watch the minds of men (I think. That part was hard to hear). Ambrose is asking himself, “why me, why now?” Simple. Ambrose is in his way. Run.

It is announced that Nikki Bella will defend the Divas title against both Paige and Naomi in a triple threat match at EC.

MATCH 3: R-TRUTH VS. STARDUST
Stardust gets the jobber non-entrance treatment. He hits a boot, then clubs Truth across the back. Truth comes back with a hiptoss, then nails an uppercut that sends Stardust to the outside. Stardust hits a hotshot from the apron, then nails a springboard dropkick for 2. It’s announced Truth will be in the IC title match at EC as well. Back to the match, Stardust stomps Truth down against the ropes, then drives his knee into Truth’s back before applying a straightjacket. He snaps Truth down by the neck, then stomps the side of his head. He hits a short-arm clothesline and a punch to the face, then goes back to the straightjacket. Truth gets to his feet and manages to break free with elbows and punches. He goes for the Osaka street cutter, but Stardust escapes and hits the Disaster Kick for 2. He gets another 2-count, then hits Dark Matter for 2. Stardust pulls off one of his gloves and nails Truth with punches in the corner. As he grabs his glove, Truth kicks him in the face, picks up the glove in some kind of weird distraction, then hits Lil’ Jimmy for 3.

WINNER: R-TRUTH.

Renee Young is standing by with Ryback, who is also in the IC title match. She asks about what is going through his mind going into the Chamber. He says he’s never competed in this match before, and he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t intimidating. At the same time, he’s chomping at the bit to get inside. He’s a starved lion trapped in a cage with five antelope. What does Young think would happen. She says something stupid about vegans. Ryback then delivers a message to the five others: The Big Guy’s hungry, and anything that stands between him and the IC title will get devoured. He’s hungry. The WWE Universe is hungry. And when people are hungry, people say “Feed me more”. Ryback then tells her he has some great vegan recipes and he’s quite the cook. Again, stupid vegan lines.

MATCH 4: THE META POWERS (CURTIS AXEL AND MACHO MANDOW) VS. ADAM ROSE AND HEATH SLATER (W/ROSA MENDES)
Mandow and Slater start with a lock-up, with Mandow backing Slater into the ropes before giving a clean break. He misses a clothesline, and Slater applies a side headlock. The two crisscross until Mandow hits a back elbow. He throws Slater into the buckles, then snaps off some jabs. Rose comes in and gets the same treatment before Mandow hits him with an inside-out hotshot. Back in the ring, Slater hits a Harlem side kick for 2, then kicks Mandow in the back. Rose tags in, and the two hit a double suplex for 2. Rose drops some elbows and a fist for another 2, then tags in Slater. Slater hits a kick to the gut, then chokes Mandow over the middle rope. Rose back in, and he kicks Mandow off the ropes for 2 before applying a rear chinlock. Mandow counters with a back suplex. Rose tags out, as does Mandow. Axel hulks out, does the finger point, hits the three punches and the big boot. Rose comes in, but Mandow backdrops him to the floor. Axel hits an Atomic Legdrop and gets 3.

WINNER: THE META POWERS.

The two have a pose-down after the match.

Renee Young is now standing by with Bo Dallas for some reason. She says Dallas made quite the impact on RAW when he attacked Neville. We go to that footage. Back to Young and Dallas. She asks why he attacked Neville. He says when he was a kid, a bird used to land on his windowsill every morning. God, his voice is obnoxious. The bird was beautiful with bright colors, and could fly higher than the rest. One day, it flew too high, hit a power line and hurt its wing. He watched it try to fly again, but it couldn’t, so he came along, took the bird, fed it, coddled it and nursed it back to health. With his help, the bird overcame adversity and flew away. Just like that bird, Neville has a broken wing. He’s trying to make Neville stronger. With Dallas’ help, he can overcome adversity and fly away. All he has to do is Bolieve.

MATCH 5: DEAN AMBROSE VS. BRAY WYATT
The two lock-up, and Ambrose applies a side headlock. Wyatt comes back with a shoulder off the ropes, but then runs into a drop toehold. Ambrose pounds Wyatt’s knee, then snaps it backwards before hitting a dragon screw. He sets Wyatt’s leg up on the middle rope in the corner and hits a kick to the knee, but Wyatt shakes it off and drops Ambrose with an uppercut. Ambrose comes back with a kneelift against the ropes and a flying forearms that sends Wyatt to the floor. He follows up with a suicide dive, breaks the count, goes for a dive off the apron, only to have Wyatt sidestep him and send him knee-first into the ring steps. Commercials.

Back from the break, Wyatt has Ambrose in a rear chinlock, with his knee in the back. Ambrose fights to his feet, but then gets kicked in the knee. Wyatt hits a bodyslam, then misses a running senton. Ambrose pelts Wyatt with rights and goes for a cross-body, but Wyatt blocks it with a vertical splash. My feed cuts in and out, making the next minute choppy. When it comes back, Wyatt has Ambrose draped across the middle rope. He then yanks on Ambrose’s neck from the floor and looks for a suspended DDT. Ambrose fights him off and turns it into a tornado DDT on the floor. Ambrose is up first, and he throws Wyatt in before climbing back in himself. They pull themselves up in opposite corners, and Ambrose hits a corner forearm. Wyatt shoves off a bulldog, but Ambrose rebounds with a clothesline. He hits several strikes, and my feed starts acting wonky again. When it comes back, Wyatt is on the floor, and Ambrose goes for a suicide dive. Wyatt catches him and looks for Sister Abigail. Ambrose escapes, so Wyatt tries to roll him back in the ring. Wyatt spins through on the apron and levels Wyatt with a clothesline. Back in the ring now, Ambrose heads up top for the flying elbow. Wyatt catches him and looks for the standing uranage. Ambrose escapes and goes for Dirty Deeds. Wyatt escapes and hits the uranage on the second try for 2. Wyatt hits a right, and my feed sucks yet again. Back on a few second later, Ambrose hits a low dropkick and goes up top. Jamie Noble runs down and jumps on the apron to distract the referee, which allows Joey Mercury to shove Ambrose off. He lands on his feet, but gets caught in Sister Abigail. Ambrose reverses it into a schoolboy for 2, gets hit with an uppercut, then rebounds off the ropes with a clothesline. As both men are down, Seth Rollins marches down to ringside. Before he gets to the ring, Roman Reigns heads down through the crowd. He nails both members of J&J, then chases Rollins back up the ramp. Noble attacks him from behind, and Reigns chases him into the ring, where Ambrose pelts him with fists. Wyatt is back up, and he throws Ambrose into the ropes. Ambrose avoids a charge and ends up hung up on the middle rope. as the ref is getting Noble out of the ring, Reigns nails a Superman Punch on Wyatt, and Ambrose follows up with Dirty Deeds for 3.

WINNER: DEAN AMBROSE.

End of show.

WWE: It’s good to be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

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WWE SmackDown Results and May 14 Recap

May 16, 2015 By: Category: Videos, WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week opens with Bray Wyatt appearing on the screen. He says that, last Monday night, Ryback stood toe-to-toe with fate, and won. But Wyatt knows that, beneath the muscle-made facade, is an Achilles heel. He wants to expose. He will make an example of Ryback, and he will prove to the world Ryback is chasing a Garden of Eden that doesn’t exist. Tonight, Ryback will try to scratch an itch, but beneath the surface, his wounds will fester with malice. Scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch. And Wyatt will come forth and turn his dreams into nightmares. Here’s some advice, friend: resist the itch and run.

Dean Ambrose makes his way down to the ring. He says he works best alone. He fights alone. He drinks alone. It felt good on Monday to be standing all alone in the ring, because alone is what he’ll be this Sunday at Payback. Once the bell rings, it’s every man for himself. We’ve got Seth Rollins, the little troll with his Lollipop Guild goon squad. We’ve got Randy Orton, who ate a spear from Roman Reigns last time. Moving onto Reigns…so, yeah. He hit Dirty Deeds on his only friend. He didn’t plan on it, and we know what happens when things get out of hand with Ambrose. So, he has one thing he wants to say to Reigns before they do battle on Sunday.

On that note, Reigns marches down through the crowd. As he does so, we find out the main event is Reigns/Kane Part 812, in a match with no count-outs or DQs. Joy. Anyway, Reigns enters the ring, and Ambrose says he knows he won’t get an apology. Reigns gets in Ambrose’s face, smiles and says he wouldn’t expect one. Ambrose did exactly what Reigns thought he would do, and that’s pull the trigger. He hit Dirty Deeds one time, and that’s all he gets. At Payback, it’s Reigns’ turn to get payback. Tonight, they are brothers with no grudges, but this Sunday, Reigns is bringing the big guns, and he hopes Ambrose does the same. Reigns offers a handshake.

Ambrose starts to accept, but then Kane comes out. He hates to break up this moment, but as DOO, he’s here to let them know they should be less concerned winning the Slammy for “Bromance of the Year” and more concerned with the fatal four-way on Sunday. They should be concerned on even making it to Sunday. Ambrose says Kane should be concerned, because on RAW, Triple H said if Seth Rollins loses on Sunday, Kane is out of a job. So, technically, this could be the last time we ever see “Corporate Kane”. Kane says he’s not concerned, because next Monday, he will still be employed. He’ll deal with Reigns later, but now, he’s here to tell Ambrose he has a match, since that’s what’s best for business. Tonight, Ambrose will face Sheamus, and that match begins now. Ambrose cuts him off and says “right now” is the only time Kane knows when to make a match. So, if Sheamus is done French-braiding his beard, get him out here, and let’s get this fight started.

MATCH 1: DEAN AMBROSE VS. SHEAMUS
They go into a lock-up, and Sheamus backs Ambrose against the ropes. Ambrose escapes and goes into another lock-up. He backs Sheamus into the corner before giving a sort-of clean break. Another lock-up, and now Sheamus grabs Ambrose around the neck. Ambrose reverses into a hammerlock, but Sheamus quickly gets to the ropes for a break. Sheamus nails a boot and hits a hip throw. Ambrose fights back up and sends Sheamus into the ropes, only to have Sheamus nail a shoulderblock. The two crisscross until Ambrose hits a drop toehold. Ambrose turns it into a leglock, then pulls Sheamus back by the mohawk before applying a half-straightjacket. He breaks his own hold with a kick to the back of the head, then grinds his forearm into Sheamus’ face in the corner. Sheamus comes back with some shots, then nails a European uppercut. He hits a bodyslam, then kicks Ambrose in the spine. Ambrose comes back with some punches, but Sheamus nails another European uppercut, sending Ambrose to the corner. Sheamus grinds his forearm into Ambrose’s face now. He misses a clothesline, and Ambrose connects with one of his own. Sheamus hits a boot out of the corner, then throws Ambrose in, only to misses a running shoulder. Ambrose hits a corner forearm, then connects with a running bulldog. He nails a series of shots against the ropes, then charges in. Sheamus sidesteps him and sends him outside, only Ambrose skins the cat and pulls himself to the apron. Sheamus quickly tries to tie him up for the 10 Beats, but Ambrose elbows his way out. As he comes back into the ring, Sheamus nails him with a running knee, sending him to the floor. Outside, Sheamus launches Ambrose into the barricade, then rolls back in to break the count as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, Sheamus has Ambrose in a rear chinlock. Ambrose breaks free, but then eats a kick. Sheamus goes for the Irish Clover-Leaf, but Ambrose kicks him off. He snaps off a few jabs and a headbutt, avoids a back-body drop and goes for a kick. Sheamus catches the foot and locks in the Irish Clover-Leaf. Ambrose manages to crawl to the ropes for the break, only to have Sheamus kick him in the chest. Sheamus goes for White Noise, but Ambrose counters into a sunset flip for 2. Ambrose hits a few more shots before running into White Noise, which connects on the second attempt. Sheamus signals for the Brogue Kick, but Ambrose sees it coming and rolls to the floor. Sheamus follows and rolls him back in, only to have Ambrose keep spinning and floor Sheamus with a clothesline at ringside. Ambrose climbs to the apron, kicks Sheamus into the barricade, then goes for a suicide dive. Sheamus meets him through the ropes with a forearm, then attempts the Brogue Kick again. Ambrose once again avoids it and clotheslines Sheamus to the floor. Ambrose hits the suicide dive on the second try, then rolls Sheamus back in. He heads up top, dives over Sheamus, who sees him coming, then runs right into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for 2. Sheamus slugs Ambrose a few times, but Ambrose comes back yet again with some forearm strikes. Sheamus hits a back elbow, only to have Ambrose rebound with a clothesline. Ambrose rolls to the apron and heads up top once more. Sheamus meets him on the buckles and climbs up for what looks like a super powerslam. Ambrose escapes and shoves Sheamus head-first into the ring post, then rolls him up for 3.

WINNER: DEAN AMBROSE.

Outside of a count-out win against Daniel Bryan, has Sheamus won a single televised match since his return?

Kane is watching on a monitor in his office, when Seth Rollins and J&J enter. Rollins has a question, but reminds Kane of what Triple H said on RAW. Now, to the question: Rollins heard a rumor that Kane isn’t sure he wants to help Rollins on Sunday. Rollins asks if that’s true, then reminds Kane how much he gets paid as DOO. Kane says he’s set for life. He saved his money and doesn’t need the paycheck. Rollins is sorry Kane feels that way, but Kane needs to do the right thing. Kane says he’s struggling with that. In fact, he doesn’t know if he’ll know what the right thing is until he’s ringside on Sunday. Now, if they’ll excuse him, he has to get ready for his match with Reigns. Rollins wishes him good luck, and Kane wishes Rollins good luck as well…in his match against Ryback tonight.

Rusev and Lana make their way out, and Lana appears to be carrying a folder in her arm. In the ring, Rusev orders the crowd to shut up, then tells Lana to read what’s in her arm. She says last week on RAW, she betrayed her country by indulging in your perverse western customs. She allowed false ideologies to corrupt her loyalty and dedication to the Russian Federation and their long-standing traditions. She begs for forgiveness of her family, Mother Russia, and most of all, the super athlete and America’s only champion, Rusev. Rusev hands her the Russian flag then tells John Cena that, on RAW, he showed everyone why he will lose on Sunday at Payback. Cena was not prepared. He lacks focus. We cut to the video, where a match between Cena and Neville was ended by Rusev interference. Rusev then locked Cena in the Accolade. Back to the arena, Rusev says he knows what Cena was thinking in that hold. His mind was saying “I quit”, right before he passed out. The only difference between RAW and Payback is that everyone will hear Cena say those words. We then cut to a gif of Cena saying “I quit”. Back to the arena again, Rusev celebrates as the Russian flag drops down behind him.

Renee Young is standing by with Ryback. She asks if he can focus on his match tonight, knowing Bray Wyatt has threatened to come after him. He says tonight is huge. Going out there and defeating Rollins could earn him a title match. He doesn’t take anything for granted. His message is simple: Start full, then empty. Don’t leave anything out in the ring. As far as Wyatt goes, he gets it. He looks like a meathead. But he’s no dummy, and on RAW, the “Eater of Worlds” tasted a Meat Hook. At Payback, he’ll pick up where he left off. Tonight, though, he’s got Rollins. “The Big Guy” is hungry, and that means only one thing: “Feed me more”.

Another batch of Tough Enough submissions, this time including Tessa Blanchard and my friend, Josh “Caleb Crush” Sipple. These two are the only ones that stood out for me (for obvious reasons). The rest were either about as stereotypical as they come, or sob stories. Oh, and Gabriel Iglesias.

Seth Rollins and J&J come out for Rollins’ match, but before that, Rollins says we all saw what happened Monday night. It switches over to RAW, where the other three in the title match each took turns hitting their finishers on Rollins while Kane stood by. Back to the arena, Rollins says he hopes everyone enjoyed that because that is the last time you will ever see anything like that happen to him. It won’t happen at Payback, because it will be every man for himself. Reigns, Ambrose and Orton are just as cut-throat as Rollins, and they will cut each other’s throats, with Rollins there to pick up the pieces. With his security, his superior athleticism and superior mental acumen, and with the DOO Kane in his corner, he will emerge victorious. Now, as for tonight’s roadblock, Ryback…

Ryback’s music cuts him off, and we’re onto our match.

…Except no we’re not. As Ryback heads down to the ring, Bray Wyatt appears out of nowhere and sends Ryback flying headfirst into the floor. Commercials.

Back from the break, Ryback is pulling himself into the ring, attempting to get this match started. The referee checks on him, and he gives the okay to start.

MATCH 2: WWE WORLD CHAMPION SETH ROLLINS (W/J&J SECURITY) VS. RYBACK (NON-TITLE)
Rollins immediately goes on the attack in the corner, then nails a series of quick punches to the temple. Rollins goes for a suplex, but Ryback reverses. Rollins breaks it with knees to the top of the head, then hits a complete shot into the middle buckle. He sends Ryback to the floor with a knee to the back, then distracts the referee so J&J can stomp Ryback down. Ryback tries to pull himself back up and just barely makes it back in at 9. Rollins hits a trio of boots, then drops Ryback with a DDT for 2. Rollins chokes Ryback over the middle rope, then pelts him with more rights. Ryback throws a few weak punches, then manages to hit a Thesz press before grabbing Rollins by the ears and slamming his head into the mat. He then collapses, which allows Rollins to hit a neckbreaker for a pair of 2-counts. Rollins locks in a front chancery, but Ryback manages to power himself to his feet and escape the hold by tossing Rollins, once again collapsing in the process. Rollins recovers, but then runs into a back-body drop. Ryback avoids a corner splash, but then runs into a boot. Rollins dives off the middle buckle, and Ryback catches him, then spins him around into a powerslam. Ryback hits a pair of shoulders off the ropes, then catches Rollins with a spinebuster for 2. Ryback pulls himself up and signals for the Meat Hook, only to have Joey Mercury try to interfere. Ryback goes after him, which allows Rollins to roll Ryback up for 2. Ryback turns around and blasts Rollins with a Meat Hook. He goes for Shell Shocked, but Jamie Noble distracts the referee, which allows Rollins to rake the eyes and escapes. Rollins hits a high kick from the apron, then connects with a flying knee from the top. Rollins then connects with a thrust kick. Ryback fights to get back up, and when he does, Rollins hits another thrust kick for 3.

WINNER: SETH ROLLINS.

Renee Young is standing by with Naomi and Tamina. She says we’ve seen a new side of Naomi, then cuts to some clips. Back to the interview, Young asks about the change in demeanor. Naomi says they’re tired of being overlooked. She’s been here for years. She’s the best athlete in the division, and Tamina is a powerhouse. What has the WWE Universe given them in return? A whole lot of nothing. They’re sick of walking around, empty-handed. Opportunities aren’t given to girls like them, so they’re taking the opportunities. Tamina pipes in and says this division is run by them now. Naomi says the other girls don’t stand a chance. Nikki Bella is as fake as they come. She’s just desperate for attention. And don’t get her started on Brie Bella. Brie is nothing. She’s a quitter, just like her pathetic husband. Sometimes, a good girl needs to be bad in order to get things done.

The New Day come out, and Xavier Woods orders the music to be cut off. He says that Tyson Kidd and Cesaro are cheaters. But, out of the kindness within their souls, they will give the former champs a second chance at the titles at Payback in a best-of-3-falls match. Big E says Cesaro and Kidd are bad people. They don’t recycle. They double-dip. And when they go to the theaters, they buy one ticket, and seat two. Kofi Kingston says there is some good news for the fans. They don’t have to be like Cesaro and Kidd. They can choose to be like the New Day. The New Day are the change you need to see in this world. Woods tells everyone to sing with them and tries to get a “New Day rocks” chant, which of course they don’t get.

MATCH 3: WWE TAG TEAM CO-CHAMPION KOFI KINGSTON (W/BIG E AND XAVIER WOODS) VS. TYSON KIDD (W/CESARO AND NATALYA)
Kidd goes for a waistlock, but Kofi breaks it with an elbow. He beats Kidd down, but Kidd comes back with punches. Kofi blocks a shot, hits an inverted suplex and floats over into an armbar in a very nice combination. Kidd fights out and avoids a trip attempt. Kofi slides to the floor, and Kidd kicks him through the ropes before hitting a somersault plancha to the floor. Kidd rolls Kofi back in for a 2-count, then goes for the Sharpshooter. E jumps on the apron for a distraction, but gets wiped out with a Cesaro clothesline. Woods tries the tactic as well, so Natalya grabs him by the foot and holds him for a kick to the head by Kidd. Kofi then rolls Kidd up with a handful of tights, but only gets 2. He misses Trouble in Paradise, and Kidd locks in the Sharpshooter. He drags Kofi to the center of the ring and sits down tight, forcing Kofi to tap.

WINNER: TYSON KIDD.

It is announced that the Elimination Chamber event returns this month on the WWE Network.

We get clips from Daniel Bryan handing over the Intercontinental title on Monday night and being forced out of action once again due to injuries. I really hate to say it, but I legitimately fear Bryan’s in-ring career is over.

Bo Dallas comes out, reminding us he still has a job. He says this past week on RAW may have been the last time we see our beloved Bryan. Life isn’t all about yes or no. Albert Einstein once said that in the middle of difficulty lies opportunity, and while Bryan being gone is going to be difficult, this is Dallas’ opportunity to be there for all of the fans. There are five stages of grief, and he can help you through them all. The first is denial. There is no denying Bryan let everyone down. The second is anger. Anger is good. Anger is healthy, especially when you direct it at Bryan for letting you all down. Then there’s bargaining, and you’re all going to get a heck of a bargain on the Bryan t-shirts now that he’s gone. Then there’s depression. Depression is what is going to completely engulf Bryan once he realizes everyone is about to forget about him (as he says this and I look at his face, now sporting a beard, I realize he’s trying desperately to look like his far more successful brother). Last, but certainly not least, is acceptance. Dallas can help you all accept the fact that Bryan is gone and never coming back. All you do is Bolieve! At this point, his voice was cracking worse than the Pimply-Faced College Kid on the The Simpsons.

MATCH 4: BO DALLAS VS. NEVILLE
After the entrances, we go to commercial. When we come back, Neville is being sent into the corner, only to flip his way out of making impact. He flips across the ring and hits a cross-body from the middle for 2. We are informed King Barrett is on commentary, as he’s facing Neville at Payback. Neville has Dallas in a side headlock, but Dallas fights his way out and sends Neville to the outside. Neville lands on the apron, then low-bridges an incoming Dallas. He kicks Dallas from the apron, only to have Dallas trip him up. Dallas rolls him into the ring, covers his head with the ring skirt and pounds away before getting back in and hitting a clothesline for 2. Dallas applies a cravat, which Neville counters with a snapmare. He slides through Dallas’ legs, hits a few kicks, a running boot and a forearm. Neville nails a step-up enziguri, then hits the Red Arrow for 3.

WINNER: NEVILLE.

Barrett jumps up on the announce desk and says how dare Neville try to pass himself off as a challenge to the King’s throne. He doesn’t have time for frivolities of a mere peasant like Neville, especially one that comes out week after week in such a ridiculous costume. Neville is in need of some good, old-fashioned corporal punishment, and that’s exactly what he’ll get at Payback, and it will come in the form of a Royal Bull Hammer. Now, subjects, repeat after him: All hail King Barrett!

We see Adam Rose giving Rosa Mendes Eskimo kisses in the back. She looks disgusted, so she asks what’s wrong. Apparently, Rose’s hot dog keeps staring at them. No, that’s not a metaphor for an erection. Rose orders his hot dog to come over. The hot dog says his name is Carl, and he wants to know when the Exotic Express is getting paid. Rose says he doesn’t pay them to talk. This is about more than money; this is a revolution. This is about high art. Carl asks if they’re not getting paid then. Rose grabs him and says he’s just like the Bunny, in that he doesn’t get it. Rose throws him to the ground, then says the party is officially over. Rosa says the party is about to begin, then proceeds to try to lick his brain stem by shoving her tongue as far into his mouth as possible.

MATCH 5-EXTREME RULES MATCH: KANE VS. ROMAN REIGNS
No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, NO! I’m sorry, but I can’t do this. I am so damn sick of seeing these two slog through another snooze-fest. I like Reigns, but Kane is at the point of his career where he’s just dragging everyone down that he works with. Why he is still working when he planned to retire several years ago, I’ll never know.

The two brawl at ringside for a couple minutes. Then the match starts. A kendo stick comes into play. Seth Rollins and J&J are looking on via monitor in the back. The announce desk gets torn up. The steps get torn up. Kane hits a sloppy DDT. Reigns kicks out of a chokeslam through a table. Reigns spears Kane through a table and gets 3 after about 8 minutes.

WINNER: ROMAN REIGNS.

Renee Young is standing by with Rollins and J&J. She asks how his confidence is after seeing Reigns wins just now. Rollins says he has never taken anything away from Reigns. Kane is nothing to sneeze at, but it will take more to take the WWE World title, and that goes for Dean Ambrose & Randy Orton as well. On Sunday, they will all be losers, just like…Rollins stops when he notices Young backing away. The camera pans out, and Ambrose is eating a snack while standing behind Rollins and J&J. They turn around, and Ambrose offers a cookie. He then throws the plate at the three and assaults Rollins. Rollins fights back, and that’s when Reigns comes in with an equipment box. He rams it into J&J, then chases Rollins off before having a brief stare-down with Ambrose. The camera pans down, and the WWE World title belt is at their feet. The two stare at each other a bit more as Reigns offers a handshake. Ambrose goes to shake it, but instead picks up the belt and sets it on Reigns’ shoulder. He says not to worry; he’ll take it on Sunday.

End of show.

WWE: It’s good to be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

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WWE SmackDown Results and May 7 Recap

May 10, 2015 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week emanates from Ottawa, Canada. Jerry Lawler is in the ring, and he says that last week, exclusively on the WWE Network, they held the 2015 KOTR tournament. It’s an honor to be crowned, because it means you held your own in a multi-match tournament with little downtime. It says a lot about an athletes credentials and means you’re pretty darn good if you can win. So now, he’d like to introduce the winner of this year’s tournament, King Barrett.

Barrett comes down, wearing the crown & cape, and carrying a scepter. Looks like he’s officially going by the moniker “King Barrett” now. The crowd chants for Lawler as Barrett gets into the ring. He goes to congratulate Barrett, but Barrett cuts him off and says there’s only one king in WWE, and it certainly isn’t Lawler. Lawler just likes to call himself “The King”. Barrett earned that accolade by beating 3 men in 24 hours to get the title. So, if Lawler thinks he can address Barrett as an equal, he’s got another thing coming. If Lawler wants to start this conversation, he has to do the same thing as all these commoners here, and that’s utter the following words: “All hail King Barrett”. Correct him if he’s wrong, but the trailer parks of Memphis doesn’t have any castles. Just like that other phony king, Elvis Presley, the only throne Lawler is qualified to sit on is the bloody toilet. So, just repeat the four magic words instead. Lawler says he’s not going to do that. Barrett orders him to and gets in his face, but Lawler stands his ground. Barrett then says this interview is over. He takes off his crown and cape, drops his scepter and signals for the Bull Hammer.

Dolph Ziggler comes out before this can go further. He congratulates Barrett on becoming the KOTR, but Barrett isn’t coming off like royalty; he’s coming off like a renaissance faire reject. Barrett was wearing the crown to tight. It’s a good thing he dropped his gear, because Ziggler’s about to drop him.

MATCH 1: KING BARRETT VS. DOLPH ZIGGLER
The two lock up, and Barrett drops Ziggler with a kneelift, followed by an elbow to the back. Ziggler comes back with some weak shots, only to run into a back elbow. Barrett throws Ziggler to the corner, then proceeds to stomp him down. Barrett hits a quick suplex for 2, then drops a knee off the ropes for another 2. My feed cuts out in the middle of an Irish whip, and when it comes back, Barrett has Ziggler in a rear chinlock. Ziggler gets to his feet, elbows his way out, hits a headbutt and goes for a corner whip. Barrett reverses, but Ziggler puts on the breaks and goes for a headscissors. Barrett tosses him up and kicks him right in the face on the way back down for a 2-count. Barrett drives his knee into Ziggler’s back a couple times, then drives him down with a modified surfboard. Ziggler reverses, nails some punches and hits Barrett with a jawbreaker before running into the Winds of Change for 2. I love that move. Barrett tells the crowd to bow down to the king, but he winds up taking too much time, and Ziggler comes back with a rocker dropper for 2, only to have Sheamus come down and assault Ziggler, leading to the DQ.

WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: DOLPH ZIGGLER.

Barrett and Sheamus proceed to double-team Ziggler in the corner before Sheamus sends him into a big boot by Barrett. Alliteration is fun. The assault continues as they tie Ziggler up in the ropes, and that’s when Neville comes from out of nowhere, hitting Sheamus with a dropkick and sending Barrett to the floor with a flying forearm.

After some commercials, we come back, and Barrett is assaulting Neville at ringside. Apparently, during the commercials, a new match was both made and started.

MATCH 2: KING BARRETT AND SHEAMUS VS. NEVILLE AND DOLPH ZIGGLER
Barrett rams Neville into the ring apron on the floor, then rolls him in before tagging in Sheamus. Barrett holds Neville down as Sheamus stomps on him. Sheamus kicks him right across the face, then nails him with a right. Neville fights back with a few strikes, then tries to dive over Sheamus to make the tag. Sheamus blocks him, tosses him, then knocks Ziggler off the apron. He turns around and catches Neville with an Irish Curse for 2, then drags him to the heel corner for a tag. Barrett stomps Neville, then strikes him with a series of kneelifts. He corner-whips Neville, then catches him with a backbreaker for 2. Barrett applies a rear chinlock, but Neville quickly fights out. He lands a kick off the ropes and goes for a tag, but Barrett grabs him and hits a big boot. Sheamus back in, and he comes off the ropes with a quick knee. Sheamus grinds Neville down with a rear chinlock, then gets a 2-count. Neville tries to get to his corner, but Sheamus cuts him off. Neville hits some weak body blows, but then gets caught with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Sheamus rolls Neville to the apron, then pulls him up for the 10 Beats of the Bodhran. He only gets in three before Neville catches him with a hotshot. Neville rolls back in, runs into a powerslam, escapes to the corner, then avoids a shoulder thrust. Sheamus collides with the ring post and falls to the floor. Back in, Sheamus tags out to Barrett while Neville tags Ziggler. Ziggler hits a pair of clotheslines and a corner splash. Barrett avoids a neckbreaker and shoves Ziggler off, only to send Ziggler into Sheamus with a shot to the face. Ziggler turns around and pops off a nice dropkick on Barrett, then hits a leaping DDT for 2. He goes for the rocker dropper, misses, and gets caught in the Wasteland. Ziggler escapes and nails a superkick for 2. Sheamus in, and he misses a Brogue Kick before Ziggler sends him to the floor. Neville wipes him out with a twisting suicide dive, and Barrett then rolls Ziggler up for 2 with his feet on the ropes, which Neville sees and puts a stop to. Barrett turns to argue with Neville on the floor, which allows Ziggler to drop him with a Zig-Zag for 3.

WINNERS: NEVILLE AND DOLPH ZIGGLER.

You know, if both of these duos stay together, we could have two really good teams for the tag team division. Both sides gel really well, despite both teams pretty much being thrown together.

The New Day have challenged Cesaro and Tyson Kidd to a six-man match, with the latter getting to choose a third man.

Renee Young is standing by with Dean Ambrose. She mentions he’s going into Payback with a 1-in-4 chance of walking out as WWE World Champion. How does he feel about that? Ambrose says those are better odds than he had before he beat Seth Rollins on RAW and got into this match. He’s not a math or science guy. He’d rather hang out under the bleachers. He’s never cared for rules or schedules or authority. There’s something called chaos that they can’t factor in to any of the equations they like to use. In a fatal 4-way match, anyone can win at any time. That means maybe the last guy you’d expect or want walks out the NEW WWE World Champion. The contract signing tonight should be interesting. He’s a bit of a party crasher, and he has a feeling nobody is going to be happy to see him.

MATCH 3: LUKE HARPER VS. FANDANGO
So…this is what Harper has been reduced to. Breaking up the Wyatt Family was a huge mistake. Fandango is now high-fiving fans, so I guess he’s officially a babyface now, not that anyone really gives a damn. Harper appears to be doing the Fandango dance for a moment, but he uses it as a distraction, only to nail Fandango with a big boot a moment later. He follows up with a bodyslam. He goes for another, but Fandango slides out and hits a few shots before connecting with a seated dropkick off the ropes. He ducks a clothesline and hits a spinning heel kick, then hits a boot out of the corner. He drops Harper with a tornado DDT, then goes up for the Last Dance. Harper is up quickly, and he launches Fandango to the mat. He nails a big superkick, lays Fandango out with a discus clothesline and gets 3.

WINNER: LUKE HARPER.

Erick Rowan’s music hits. Wait…this crap with Harper is still going? Did it really ever even get off the ground? Does anyone even care about Rowan? Rowan enters the ring and removes the sheep mask. He then proceeds to stomp Fandango into obvlivion before dropping a big knee. He then hits him with a full-nelson slam, which is already Damien Sandow’s finisher, and is now the third finisher Rowan has had in about a year. How much you want to bet Sandow is forced to change his? Anyway, Rowan then leaves as Harper looks on.

Okay, if they’re planning on putting these two together, I can get behind that, especially due to the fact that Rowan is utterly worthless on his own.

After some commercials, we return to Lana in the ring. She is smiling. She tells the fans not to cheer for her, as it angers Rusev. Rusev then comes out on this note. Rusev gets in the ring and berates her in Russian before ordering her out of the ring. Well, there goes the only reason anyone gives a damn about Rusev. That won’t stop WWE from shoving him down our throats, though. Rusev looks around the crowd, then says all of John Cena’s victories have been nothing but flukes and miracles. *Russian* Last Monday on RAW, Cena showed Sami Zayn mercy, which is a sign of weakness. Rusev is a machine. He shows no mercy and has no weaknesses. At Payback, he will expose Cena to the world and win back the US title. In their final battle, Cena will be crushed, and everything he’s built over the years will crumble. But on this coming RAW, he wants to meet Cena eye-to-eye in the ring and tell him to his face why Cena will say the words “I quit”.

Renee Young is now standing by with Roman Reigns. She brings up the fatal 4-way and his history with all three competitors. She asks if he has any conflicting emotions going into this. He says not really. He’s been rivals with Randy Orton since day 1. He pretty much hates everything about Seth Rollins. Dean Ambrose is like a brother him, and he trusts Ambrose, which means he also trusts Ambrose will do anything to walk out as champion. However, Reigns is bringing the biggest fight the world has ever seen to Payback, so the quicker he signs the contract, the closer he gets to punching someone in the mouth. Not for fun this time; for championship gold. Believe that.

The New Day is in the ring, and we’re waiting to see who Cesaro and Kidd found. They come out with Natalya. A moment later, their partner comes out…and it’s Ryback.

MATCH 4: THE NEW DAY (WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS BIG E & KOFI KINGSTON, AND XAVIER WOODS) VS. CESARO, TYSON KIDD AND RYBACK (W/NATALYA)
The feed for this match is pure dogsh*t, so I apologize in advance, because you’re not going to get much of a recap, I fear. After a few moments of garbled mess, which started with Ryback and Kofi, things clear up a bit with both Kidd and Woods tagging in. Kidd applies a side headlock before making a blind tag to Cesaro off an Irish whip. Cesaro comes in with a big clothesline, then hits a delayed vertical suplex after saying to Ryback, “Big Guy, this one’s for you.” As he has Woods up, E tries to run interference, so Ryback comes in and hoists him up in a delayed vertical as well. Kidd and Kofi comes in, and Kidd joins the fray with a snap suplex. Back to Cesaro and Woods, Cesaro throws Woods to the corner and tags in Kidd. The two stomps Woods down to a “New Day sucks!” chant. Ryback tags in and does his own “New Day sucks” stomp before hitting a bodyslam. Kidd back in as Woods rolls to the apron. Woods shoulders Kidd and comes in with a sunset flip. Kidd rolls through and goes for a Sharpshooter, but Woods rolls to the floor. Kidd wipes him out with a somersault plancha. Kofi comes in, so Cesaro sends him to the floor before surprising everyone with a suicide dive. E tries to run interference on Kidd, so Ryback runs through him with a clothesline on the floor. Kidd rolls Woods back in and goes for a corner whip. Woods reverses and sends Kidd to the floor off a headscissors attempt. Kidd lands on the apron and nails Woods, but is then distracted by Kofi, allowing Woods to shoulder him to the floor. E tags in and drops to the floor, where he rams Kidd back-first into the barricade, then into the apron, then into the barricade, and then finally into the apron again. Commercials.

Back from the break, Kofi is legal for his team, and he pins Kidd for 2 before applying a modified rear chinlock, combined with a half-nelson. Kidd fights out, but then gets clubbed across the back. Woods tags in before Kofi hits a spinning back kick off a corner whip, then comes in with a tornado DDT through the ropes for 2. E tags in and nails a body blow in the corner. E then hits an overhead belly-to-belly, followed by another one for 2. Woods tags in and kicks Kidd in the gut and sends him to the corner. Kidd reverses and sends Woods in face-first. Kofi makes the tag and knocks Cesaro off the apron. Kidd ducks a clothesline and tags in Ryback, who cleans house. He misses a clothesline, then catches Kofi off the second rope with a spinebuster. Woods tries to interfere as Ryback signals for the Meat Hook, and gets knocked to the floor. Kofi comes back with a Pendulum, only to have Ryback tag out to Cesaro. Ryback sends sends Kofi to the corner off an overhead belly-to-belly, and Cesaro comes in with a running European uppercut, then does this series three more times before setting up the Cesaro Swing. E runs interference, misses a clothesline and knocks Ryback off the apron. Cesaro sends E flying to the outside, and as Woods checks on him, Kidd nails Woods with a running kick to the face from the apron. Back in the ring, Cesaro blocks a roll-up attempt by Kofi, then nails a dropkick. He tags in Kidd, who climbs up onto Cesaro shoulders and balances there while Cesaro walks to the center of the ring, only to come off with a flying elbow. He gets 2 as E breaks up the pin. Cesaro then gets thrown to the floor by E. Ryback comes in and tosses Woods, only to get caught in the Big Ending. He manages to escape, however, and proceeds to clothesline E to the floor.Woods gets slammed onto his face by Ryback, then sent to the floor. Ryback heads out after him. The lights go out, and we see one of Bray Wyatt’s video clips. The lights come back on, and Woods has Ryback’s foot, which allows E to level him with a vertical splash. Cesaro dives onto E from the barricade and hits him with a tornado DDT. Kidd dropkicks Woods through the ropes, but then gets rolled up by Kofi, who gets 3 with a handful of tights.

WINNERS: THE NEW DAY.

Renee Young again? Oh, god. Now she’s with Randy Orton. Great. She points out he failed at Extreme Rules, then asks if he’s rethinking his strategy at Payback now that Dean Ambrose is in the match. He says doesn’t lose sleep over strategy. He’ll hit whoever is closest to him, no matter who it is, and he’ll get the WWE World title back. After tonight, the odds are that one of the former members of the Shield aren’t making it to Payback.

MATCH 5: EMMA VS. NAOMI (W/TAMINA)
Bet you forgot both Tamina and Emma still worked here. I know I did. I’m happy to see Tamina back. Emma? I don’t care. Naomi has new entrance music. We get an inset promo from Naomi and Tamina. Naomi says that all these glamour girls are trying to steal her “shine”, and it seems everyone has forgotten what she can do. Now they know. Tamina basically says the same thing about herself. Naomi says now everyone knows. Well, that sucked.

To the match, Naomi hits a kneelift off a lock-up, then throws Emma into the top buckle three times before stomping her down. Emma comes back with a boot and a couple of forearms before throwing Naomi into the buckles a few times. She hits a snapmare, then lands a seated dropkick for 2. Naomi hits a kick off the ropes, then snaps Emma down by the neck. She hits a few mounted punches and a neckbreaker. Naomi kicks Emma in the gut, then foot-chokes Emma against the bottom rope. She grinds Emma’s face across the top rope, hits a kick to the gut and a dropkick for 2. She tosses Emma into the middle buckle, but then misses a splash as Emma slides to the apron. She slides through Naomi’s legs and pulls her down for 2. Emma gets another 2 off a roll-up, then another off a jackknife. Naomi bridges up and gets in a backslide for 2. Emma ducks a clothesline before getting hit with the Rear View for 3.

WINNER: NAOMI.

Tamina hits the ring, and the two stomp Emma into oblivion. Naomi then sends Emma into a superkick by Tamina.

The Rear View is easily the worst finisher in WWE right now, by the way.

More Tough Enough clips. I still am not even remotely interested.

Oh, boy! More Renee Young! She is now with Seth Rollins, who is flanked by J&J Security. Same crap she’s asked the other guys. Rollins says he’s the guy who makes the impossible possible. For example, he beat Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania and captured his title in the process. She asks if there’s any truth to the rumor that Kane said the only reason that happened was because of him. Rollins says that sounds desperate. Kane is so irrelevant and so obsolete and so jealous of Rollins. The only reason the match at Payback is a fatal 4-way is because Kane is trying to preserve his job. It has nothing to do with a bogus match with Ambrose; it’s all because Kane is jealous of Rollins. However, Rollins has something Kane will never have: a brain. His brain has gotten him to where he is, and he always has a plan, and that includes at Payback and tonight. Rollins is the man, and the future is now.

MATCH 6: LOS MATADORES (DIEGO AND FERNANDO, W/EL TORITO) VS. THE LUCHA DRAGONS (KALISTO AND SIN CARA)
Kalisto starts with one of the Matadores, giving a handshake in the process. The two exchange some quick moves until the Matador gets Kalisto in a headlock. We learn this is Fernando. Fernando sends Kalisto into the ropes, but Kalisto comes back with a spinning headscissors, followed by a springboard headlock takedown. Cara tags in and hits a tope con hilo off a trip by Kalisto. Cara hits a headscissors off the ropes, then lands a hip throw. Fernando tries to reverse, but Cara holds on and gets back to his feet. Diego makes a blind tag and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker off the ropes for 2. Diego nails some forearms before tagging in Fernando. The Matadores leapfrog over Cara a few times before catching him off the ropes. Cara reverses the catch into a double takedown, sending Diego to the floor. Fernando gets corner-whipped, but counters a charge with a back-body drop. Cara headstands in the corner off this, but then gets kicked to the floor. As the referee is distracted, Torito takes Cara out with a running seated splash off the apron. Commercials.

Back from the break, Los Matadores hit Cara with a double suplex. Fernando is still legal once again, and he goes for a rear chinlock. Cara fights his way out and lands in the Matador corner. He elbows Diego off the apron, then hits a spinning fireman’s carry slam on Fernando. Kalisto and Diego tag in, and Kalisto wipes Diego out with a springboard cross-body, followed by a corkscrew version. He rolls Diego up in a schoolboy, but then lets go and nails him with a quick kick to the head, which he calls the Kalisto Kick. He then hits a headscissors into a sort-of piledriver for 2 as Fernando breaks it up. Fernando sends him into the ropes, but Kalisto handsprings off and nails him with a Tidal Crush, sending Fernando to the floor. Cara comes in illegally and nails Fernando with a suicide dive on the floor through Kalisto’s legs. Diego then sunset flips Kalisto, but only gets 2. Diego goes for a suplex, but Kalisto escapes. Cara makes a blind tag and nails Diego with a kick from the apron. Up top, Cara misses a swanton bomb, but manages to roll through. He charges at Diego and reverses a tilt-a-whirl into a small package for 3.

WINNERS: THE LUCHA DRAGONS.

Torito tries to console Los Matadores after the match, but they’re pissed, and one of them knocks him on his ass before both of them berate him.

Kane is in the ring with a table and four chairs. It’s time for the contract signing. He says it’s his job to make sure the fans’ voices are heard. They said they wanted to see Seth Rollins defend his title against three challengers at Payback. Tonight, he sanctions this match with all four when they sign the contract. So, let’s get everyone out here and make it official. Out first is Randy Orton. Next is Roman Reigns. After that is Dean Ambrose, and finally Seth Rollins, who is still flanked by J&J. Each man takes a seat at the table, except for Rollins, who stays on the stage. Kane says in 10 days, these four superstars will enter…Ambrose cuts him off, calls Rollins “Justin Bieber” and says that, apparently, since Rollins is a VIP, he doesn’t have to come down. He invites him, Frodo and Noble to come down anyway. Rollins says Ambrose’s humor was never Rollins’ style, but it’s still better than listening to Reigns try to form sentences. He’s not going down to the ring, and instead will stay on the stage with J&J. Reigns says he’s going to kick Rollins’ ass no matter what, then signs the contract. Orton tells Rollins they’re all here for the same reason: the title. He also signs, and Ambrose then threatens to drag Rollins’ ass down to the ring if he doesn’t sign. Ambrose signs, and Rollins says the DOO Kane has the authority to sign for Rollins, which sounds like a better idea. Kane says that’s correct in theory. He’s trying to remember what Rollins said about him earlier. What was it? Rollins said he was obsolete or irrelevant. In any case, if Rollins can’t physically attend this signing, Kane could sign for him. However, since Rollins is here and perfectly healthy, he insists Rollins sign the contract himself. Rollins finally agrees and marches down to the ring as a “Justin Bieber” chant breaks out. He gets to ringside and has Joey Mercury bring him the contract for review. Rollins looks it over and says everyone is accounted for. He calls Ambrose “Low-Rent Roddy Piper”. He never thought Ambrose was that good, but that’s what Reigns used to call him back in the day when he acted crazy, trying to entertain these idiots. There’s Reigns. He’s better at autographs than wrestling. Ambrose used to say he couldn’t wrestle his way out of a wet paper bag, according to Rollins. Finally, there’s Orton. It’s no secret how Reigns and Ambrose feel about him. They used to call him spoiled and entitled. Reigns used to say Orton never worked a day in his life. Ambrose used to say Orton’s only here because of his old man. Rollins is just telling the truth. What’s wrong with honesty. He walks into the ring with J&J and puts the contract down to sign it as the other three look ready to swarm. He hands Kane the contract as he calls him “Mr. Obsolete”. Kane says it’s because of him that Rollins is champion. Rollins argues as Ambrose, starts to push the chairs away behind Rollins’ back. Orton and Reigns look on as Ambrose then leans the table in the corner. Rollins turns around and Ambrose tells him everyone knows how this will end. He calls dibs on the table, then tosses Mercury onto it. The Authority swarm him, only to have Orton and Reigns attack them. Rollins gets clotheslined to the floor by Orton as Reigns does the same to Kane. Orton heads to the floor to continue fighting with Rollins as Mercury gets sent to the floor. Rollins nails Orton and goes after Reigns near the announce desk while Ambrose throws a chair at Mercury. Jamie Noble gets tossed, then gets hit in the head with a chair. Ambrose hits Kane with a suicide dive on the other side, then throws Rollins into the barricade. Kane tries to come back with a chokeslam, but Ambrose breaks free and shoves Kane into a Superman Punch from Reigns. Rollins tries to flee the ring, but Ambrose grabs him in Dirty Deeds. He breaks free in the corner, then leapfrogs a spear attempt by Reigns. Reigns puts on the brakes before colliding with Ambrose, but then gets dropkicked into Ambrose by Rollins. Rollins then escapes an RKO attempt and flees up the ramp. Ambrose and Reigns begin shoving each other, only to have Ambrose get nailed with an RKO. Reigns drops Orton with a Superman Punch, and Rollins comes back in with a springboard knee to Reigns’ face. He then hits a thrust kick on Reigns and holds the WWE World title triumphantly over everyone.

End of show.

WWE: It’s good to be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

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WWE SmackDown Results and April 30 Recap

May 02, 2015 By: Category: Videos, WWE | Pro Wrestling

WWE SmackDown opens with Seth Rollins, flanked by J&J Security, reaming someone off camera in the Authority’s office. The camera pans over, and we see Kane. The two then argue about what happened Monday night. Rollins blames Kane for him now having to defend his title in a triple threat match at Payback (what the hell is WWE’s deal with triple threats?) against Randy Orton and Roman Reigns. Kane says Rollins shouldn’t have a problem proving how good he is in that match. Rollins says Kane is his problem. He’s supposed to make decisions that are best for business, which in turn are best for Rollins. Kane says what’s best for business is giving fans a match they want (so why hasn’t he done it?). Rollins calls that crap, then says Kane is jealous of him. Rollins is everything Kane never was and never will be. He will rise while Kane fades away. Kane says part of his job is to help Rollins grow as an athlete and a person, and so help him, he’ll make a man out of Rollins if that’s the last thing he does. So tonight, he’s going to face the man he was supposed to last week, Dean Ambrose, because that’s what’s best for business. Rollins says what’s best for business is Kane 20 years ago, not this irrelevant Kane. He dares Kane to do something out there and prove that he has some viability, something to give to the Authority.

Roman Reigns heads down to the ring, and we see what happened on RAW with Kane losing it on Rollins and J&J, eventually costing himself and Rollins a tag match against Orton and Reigns. Back to the ring, Reigns sends a shout-out to Ambrose and wishes him luck later tonight. Rollins destroyed what they created together, that being the Shield. He also took the greatest opportunity Reigns has ever had at Wrestlemania. Since that night, he’s had to scratch and crawl, but wait until you see the fight he brings to Orton and Rollins.

Kane comes out, and he’s taking his button-down off. He waves for someone to follow him, and it’s a referee. Looks like we’re going to a match.

MATCH 1: ROMAN REIGNS VS. KANE
The two trade punches until Kane reverses a corner whip. He clubs Reigns across the back, but Reigns comes back with a series of uppercuts. Kane grabs him by the shirt and throws him onto the mat before sending him into the buckles. Kane hits a back suplex, then drops a double axe handle across the back. Reigns comes back with a boot off the rope, then low-bridges Kane to the floor. Outside, Kane comes back with an uppercut and looks to throw Reigns into the ring post. Reigns reverses, then hits the apron kick from the opposite side. Kane recovers and drops Reigns with a sidewalk slam across the announce desk. Commercials.

Back from the break, Kane has Reigns in a bearhug in the middle of the ring. Reigns elbows his way out, only to get rammed back-first into the buckles. Kane foot-chokes Reigns on the apron, then sends him into the buckles for a corner clothesline, which gets 2. Kane talks some trash, only to receive an uppercut. The two trade shots before Reigns gets the upper-hand and hits a suplex. Both men get back up, with Reigns ducking a clothesline and hitting one of his own. He blocks a corner charge, then hits a flying clothesline from the middle buckle. Reigns hits a series of corner clotheslines and uppercut. Kane comes back with one of his own before running into a Samoan drop. Reigns loads up the Superman Punch, but Kane blocks it and catches Reigns with a chokeslam for 2. Kane is livid, and he signals for the tombstone. Reigns slides out and drops Kane with a DDT. He connects with a Superman Punch and goes for the spear, but Kane sees it coming and heads for higher ground. He is counted out as we see Rollins and J&J watching on a monitor.

WINNER VIA COUNT-OUT: ROMAN REIGNS.

Renee Young approaches Rollins and wants a reaction to what just happened. Rollins says it’s obvious: Kane got in over his head. The major difference between him and Kane, aside from Kane carrying around a senior citizen discount card while Rollins carries the WWE World title, is that Rollins never runs away from a fight. He finds a way to win the fight on his own, which is exactly what he’ll do at Payback. He’ll beat both Orton and Reigns on his own. He doesn’t need the help of anyone, including the Authority and J&J. He only needs himself. He is the future, and the future is now, which makes him the man.

Tonight, we get a tag title rematch from Extreme Rules.

MATCH 2: DAMIEN SANDOW VS. CURTIS AXEL
Sandow has a new entrance theme, and it’s kind of generic. The bell rings, and Axel starts with some trash talk before ripping his shirt off. Sandow starts to do the same, but Axel tries to clothesline him. Sandow ducks and applies a side headlock before hitting a shoulder off the ropes. He finally rips the shirt off, then throws Axel to the floor. Outside, Sandow sits down next to Axel, only to hit him with a back elbow. Back in, Axel stomps Sandow as he re-enters the ring. Axel hits a corner whip and a splash before grinding his knee into Sandow’s face. Sandow avoids a second corner splash, then starts to do the Hulk Hogan bit. He connects with a big boot and follows up with You’re Welcome for 3.

WINNER: DAMIEN SANDOW.

Renee Young is with Ryback. She mentions him being attacked by Bray Wyatt on RAW. Why is Ryback Wyatt’s target? Ryback doesn’t have answer, but the “Eater of Worlds” has bitten off more than he can chew. He wants to question Ryback’s dedication, so tonight, Ryback is giving a special dedication to Wyatt when he devours Wyatt’s former disciple, Luke Harper. Wyatt, don’t worry, friend. His message will be very clear, and it won’t contain any big words. In fact, it only contains three tiny words: feed me more.

MATCH 3: RYBACK VS. LUKE HARPER
The two lock up, and Ryback applies a side headlock before hitting a shoulder off the ropes for a 0-count. Harper backs Ryback into the corner, hits a couple uppercuts, then applies a headlock of his own. Ryback turns it into a top wristlock and drives Harper down for 1. Harper breaks free with a forearm shot, then hits an uppercut. Ryback nails a few punches, misses a clothesline and hits a Thesz press. He rams the back of Harper’s head into the mat a few times, then proceeds to shoulder him in the corner. He sets Harper up on top, only to have Harper hit another uppercut. He drops down and hits a suplex before flexing for the crowd. Harper looks for another suplex, only to have Ryback reverse and hit a delayed vertical. In the corner, Ryback mounts Harper for some punches, only to have Harper drop him with a sit-out powerbomb for 2. He boots Ryback to the floor as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, Harper levels Ryback with a back elbow for 2. Harper applies the Gator Roll, but Ryback is powering his way back to his feet. He escapes the hold by tossing Harper on his face, then lays in some rights. Harper hits a boot, but then runs into a forearm that sends him to the apron. Ryback pulls him back in, hits a boot out of the corner, follows up with an over-the-shoulder powerslam and then hits a Warrior Splash for 2. Ryback sets up a powerbomb, but Harper counters into a jackknife for 2. Off the ropes, Ryback hits a spinebuster, then signals for the Meat Hook. Harper blocks it with a big boot, then nails a superkick for 2. Ryback recovers and ducks a clothesline before hitting the Meat Hook. Shell Shocked connects, and that’s good for 3.

WINNER: RYBACK.

The screen goes black, and when it comes back on, Bray Wyatt is in the ring. Ryback sees him and charges, only to get hit with a standing uranage. Wyatt pounds on him, then lays him out with Sister Abigail. He then stares at Harper for a moment before turning back to the crowd for his catchphrase.

MATCH 4-WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: BIG E AND KOFI KINGSTON (CHAMPIONS; W/XAVIER WOODS) VS. CESARO AND TYSON KIDD (W/NATALYA)
I dig Nattie’s catsuit this week. She looks great. Kidd and Kofi start with a test of strength, only to have Kidd immediately turn it into a pin for 1. The two go through a standing switch several times utnil Kidd turns the situation into a crucifix for 1. Kidd applies a rear chinlock, then turns it into an arm wringer. Kofi escapes and tosses Kidd over the top, only to have Kidd skin the cat over the top of Cesaro, who is supporting him with his back. Cesaro tags himself in as Kidd flips back into the ring, and the former champs hit Kofi with a flapjack into a Very European Uppercut for 2. Cesaro deadlifts Kofi up and hits him with a gutwrench suplex for 2. Cesaro gets in a backslide for 2, then applies a top wristlock, that he turns into a 3/4 nelson, which he then turns into a rear chinlock. Kofi counters with a jawbreaker, hits a few shots, then goes for a suplex. Cesaro blocks it, powers Kofi up into a vertical and tags in Kidd. Kidd comes off the top and he & Cesaro hit Kofi with a combination suplex/sidewalk slam for 2. Kidd applies an arm wringer and tags in Cesaro, who nails Kofi with a gut shot before hitting a butterfly suplex. Kofi rolls to the floor, only to have Cesaro give chase. Cesaro gets distracted by Woods on the outside, which allows Kofi to sneak back into the ring and tag E behind Cesaro’s back. Cesaro gets back in and hits a European uppercut on Kofi. E comes in, only to have Cesaro drop him with a German suplex. Kidd tags in, and the former champs stomp E down in sync with a “New Day sucks” chant. Kidd backflips over the top rope, hitting E with a kick in the process. He nails a shoulder through the ropes, then hits Kofi on the apron with a back elbow. He tries to kick Woods on the floor, but misses, allowing E to knock him off the apron and send him flying into the barricade. Woods taunts Kidd at E picks him up and rams him into the barricade. Back in the ring, E stomps Kidd down as Kofi tags himself in. Kofi does some stomping, then tags in E. Does the same, tags in Kofi, and slingshots him into Kidd for a dropkick that gets 2. Kofi applies an armbar, only to have Kidd fight out. Kofi trips him off the ropes, sliding to the floor in the process. Back in, Kofi goes for a double axe handle from the middle rope, only to be met by a dropkick from Kidd. E tags in and knocks Cesaro off the apron before sending Kidd to the floor with an over-the-top belly-to-belly. Commercials.

Back from the break, E has Kidd in a bearhug. Kidd escapes, but E quickly grabs him in a belly-to-belly for 2. Kofi tags in and hits a quick kick to the chest. He hits the Boom Drop, then knocks Cesaro off the apron. Kofi signals for Trouble in Paradise, but Kidd sees it coming and ducks. Kidd makes the tag to Cesaro, and Cesaro back-body drops Kofi before booting E off the apron. He nails four European uppercuts in opposite corners and follows up with a short-arm clothesline for 2. Cesaro applies a la magistral for 2, then hits a Warrior Press, followed by a double stomp for 2 as E breaks it up. Cesaro sends him to the floor, then goes after Woods, who has just jumped on the apron. Woods quickly drops down, and the distraction is enough for Kofi to roll Cesaro up for 2. Kofi hits the Pendulum in the corner and tags in E, who runs through Cesaro with a vertical splash for 2 as Kidd breaks it up this time. Kofi looks to toss Kidd, but gets tossed himself. Kidd ducks a clothesline by E and hits Kofi with a suicide dive. E turns to Cesaro in the corner, who hits him with a big knee. Cesaro mounts the middle buckle and hits a flying European uppercut. Cesaro calls for the Cesaro Swing, tags in Kidd, and the two hit Montezuma’s Revenge for 2 as Woods and Kofi break up the pin, leading to the DQ.

WINNERS VIA DISQUALIFICATION: CESARO AND TYSON KIDD; STILL CHAMPIONS: BIG E AND KOFI KINGSTON.

The 3-on-2 attack continues. Kidd gets thrown shoulder-first into the ring post and Cesaro is then stomped down by all three.

We cut to some footage from earlier today, and it’s Cameron and Summer Rae gossiping about Naomi and Brie Bella. Nikki Bella walks up a moment later, and says Cameron is brave for running Brie down when she’s not here. Nikki then tries to get all tough, then challenges Cameron to a match tonight. Cameron says she has no problem with that. Since when did the Bella Tw*ts turn face? And why are supposed to care?

Commercial for ECW Unreleased, Vol. 3. Those are always good sets.

More stupid submissions for the new season of WWE Tough Enough. Save for a female powerlifter and a female boxer, these clips are all garbage.

MATCH 5: CAMERON VS. WWE DIVAS CHAMPIONS NIKKI BELLA (NON-TITLE)
We get an inset promo from Naomi. She says something about fairytales. In the real world, the nice people fail. Brie Bella got a taste of that on RAW, and soon, Nikki will have her dreams shattered.

The match starts with a lock-up, which Nikki reverses into an armdrag. She follows up with a clothesline, then hits a snapmare before going into an armbar. Cameron breaks it with forearm shots, then throws Nikki to the corner. She tries and fails to do something sexy, then runs into a back elbow. Nikki comes off the middle with a Disaster Kick, but misses. Cameron covers her for 2, then hits some forearms to the back before kicking Nikki to the floor. Nikki starts selling a knee injury as Cameron throws her into the barricade. Back in the ring, Cameron hits a suicide kick for 2. At least she remembered to lay Nikki in the right position for the pin this time. Nikki comes back with an armdrag, only to have Cameron hit her with a hair mare. Cameron applies a rear chinlock, then jumps on Nikki’s back as she gets to her feet. Nikki breaks it by falling into the buckles. She ducks a clothesline, hits two of her own, then hits a dropsh*t. She misses a corner clothesline, hits a back elbow, then connect with a Disaster Kick for 2. Cameron rolls her up for 2, then slaps her across the face. Nikki hits her with a forearm, then connects with the Rack Attack for 3.

WINNER: NIKKI BELLA.

Another segment with the Prime-Time Players. Darren Young is pretending to cry about the New Day being the new tag champs. Titus O’Neil asks if anyone is excited about the new champs. Crickets chirp. He then introduces the New Day Be Gone Box. You can put it anywhere in your home, and if you see New Day on the screen, you just clap them away while chanting. Now, if you want the PTP on your screen, call WWE and let them know. If WWE Shop ever gets their act together and starts selling the PTP shirt, they could be printing money. “Millions of dollars” chant.

Dean Ambrose is in his locker room, warming up, when he’s approached by Seth Rollins and J&J. Rollins says he just wants to talk. They have a lot of history, and he thinks it’s in his best interest if Ambrose backs out tonight. Rollins has a huge title match at Payback, and Kane made this match out of spite. When Triple H finds out, he’s going to be furious, and he’s going to take that fury out on anyone who willingly participated, including Ambrose. Ambrose says that sounds good, then says he’ll see Rollins out there. Rollins says that’s a huge mistake, and Ambrose says his whole life has been a huge mistake. At least this one ends with him beating Rollins’ face in.

We get some highlights of the King of the Ring tournament, which was eventually won by Bad News Barrett, who defeated Neville in the finals.

MATCH 6: DEAN AMBROSE VS. WWE WORLD CHAMPION SETH ROLLINS (W/J&J SECURITY) (NON-TITLE)
Ambrose applies a hammerlock and drives Rollins into the mat. He pulls Rollins’ arm up and yanks on his fingers before sending him to the floor with a knee to the shoulder. Rollins gets back in and hits a kick, followed by a punch. Rollins hits some shoulder thrusts in the corner, then drives Ambrose down with a hammerlock of his own. Ambrose counters with a drop toehold, then goes for his version of the Regal Stretch, only to turn it into a half straight jacket, which he breaks with a shot to the back of the neck. Rollins recovers, sends Ambrose into the corner and nails him with strikes. Ambrose ducks a clothesline and hits a cross-body, right into some mounted punches. Rollins gets clotheslined to the floor near J&J. Ambrose chases them off, then intercepts Rollins with a punch before rolling him back in the ring. J&J disctract Ambrose, allowing Rollins to dropkick him through the ropes. The ref turns his back, and J&J use that to stomp Ambrose down. Kane then walks down to ringside as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, Rollins eats a forearm shot from Ambrose. He shakes it off, kicks Ambrose, then stomps him down before hitting a short-arm clothesline. He follows up with another one, then kicks Ambrose in the face a few times. Ambrose ducks a third short-arm and hits one of his own. Ambrose snaps off some jabs, followed by some punches. He hits a couple forearms off the ropes, another one in the corner and a running bulldog. Ambrose heads up top and goes for the elbow. Rollins boots him and looks for the corner powerbomb. Ambrose escapes and dropkicks Rollins to the floor. Ambrose hits a suicide dive, then rolls Ambrose back in. Rollins kicks him, ducks a rebound clothesline, misses a roundhouse, then gets hit with an atomic drop into a sit-out facebuster for 2. Rollins rolls to the apron, and Ambrose meets him at the corner, pulling him up for a superplex. Rollins fights him off, rakes the eyes and sunset flips into a running corner powerbomb for 2. Rollins goes for a thrust kick, but Ambrose blocks it and rolls him up for 2. Ambrose goes for Dirty Deeds, only to have Rollins escape and hit a Ghetto Blaster. He connects with the thrust kick this time, but only gets 2. Rollins argues with the referee as Kane is on the apron. Ambrose shoves Rollins into Kane, knocking him to the floor, then rolls Rollins up for 2. Rollins then gets backdropped onto Kane outside. J&J check on both of them, and that’s when Ambrose wipes out Kane and J&J with a flying elbow. Rollins comes out of nowhere and throws Ambrose into the barricade. He goes to check on Kane, only to have Kane grab him by the throat. Ambrose dives onto Kane, who catches him by the throat as well. The referee threatens to disqualify Rollins, so Kane lets both men go. He then goes to grab the referee, but stops. As he’s talking to the ref, Ambrose sends him face-first into the ring post. Rollins rolls Ambrose back in, only to have Rollins continue spinning. He lands on his feet on the floor and wipes out both members of J&J with a double clothesline, sending them over the announce desk. Rollins then sends Ambrose face-first into the ring steps. He rolls Ambrose back in and hits his new finisher, a falling DDT, for 3.

WINNER: SETH ROLLINS.

Kane enters the ring and appears to be targeting Rollins, but then instead stomps Ambrose down. J&J and Rollins join in the attack, and that’s when Roman Reigns’ music hits. He runs down the aisle and wipes Kane out with a Superman Punch. In the ring, he tosses J&J, then goes after Rollins. J&J jump him again, but he throws them to the side and sends Rollins to the floor. J&J then get taken out with a double spear. Kane re-enters the ring and goes for a chokeslam on both Reigns and Kane, but Reigns breaks it with a punch to the head. Ambrose follows up with a rebound clothesline, and Reigns then nails a spear as Rollins watches from the stage.

End of show.

WWE: It’s good to be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

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WWE SmackDown Results and April 23 Recap

April 25, 2015 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

Seth Rollins, and J&J Security are heading down to the ring. We get clips from RAW of Randy Orton RKO’ing everybody. Back to the arena, Rollins calls Orton oh-so clever, #RKOOuttaNowhere. He’s glad Orton got it all out of his system, because this Sunday at Extreme Rules, Orton is banned from using the RKO. I cannot stress enough that Orton is banned from using a move in a match with no disqualifications. How is no one in WWE seeing the problem here? Anyway, Triple H appointed Kane the special “gatekeeper” for this match. Rollins doesn’t care, as he doesn’t need the help of anyone in the Authority, including some aging, former monster like Kane.

This of course brings Kane down to the ring. He says Rollins doesn’t get it. He’s not a former monster. He can chokeslam Rollins to hell. He’s not just a veteran or corporate executive; he’s the guy who could be Rollins’ best friend on Sunday, or the guy who could secure the greatest loss of Rollins’ career. Rollins says they both know if Kane is not on Rollins’ side on Sunday, he’ll be fired. Kane says if Rollins were as smart as he thinks, he’d suck up to Kane, since Kane watches over the door of the cage. Rollins says the only reason Trips appointed Kane this position is because he feels sorry for Kane. Trips said it himself: Kane is not a monster; he’s a suit. A corporate entity. So, he should stick to doing what he does best, like when he laid down for Rollins. At Extreme Rules, stick to what he’s best at doing, and that’s being told what to do. That’s what’s best for business. Kane agrees and says that they believe in doing the right thing by one another, there’s something Rollins could do for him. After all, since Kane laid down for Rollins, it’s only fair that Rollins do the same for him. Rollins laughs before he realizes Kane is serious. He’s the WWE World Champion. He doesn’t lay down for anyone. Kane points out that he’s the man who holds the key to Rollins’ destiny, then orders a referee down to the ring. A referee runs down as Kane says this is non-title. He then orders J&J out of the ring. Rollins says Trips is one state away, but Kane says to ring the bell.

MATCH 1: WWE WORLD CHAMPION SETH ROLLINS (W/J&J SECURITY) VS. KANE (NON-TITLE)
Rollins continues to scream at Kane, and says they are not doing this. Kane says Trips isn’t here right now. That means that tonight, Kane is the Authority. Rollins says this isn’t best for business. Kane orders him to lay down, or he will reach down and rip Rollins’ guts out. Rollins tells him to calm down, then slowly lowers himself to the mat. Rollins tells him to get it over with. Kane gets down and tells Rollins he’s just messing with him. Kane says they’re both part of the Authority. That means they always have each others back. Unfortunately, Rollins’ real opponent isn’t as reasonable as Kane.

WINNER: NO CONTEST.

Rollins argues about having to wrestle, but Kane reminds him he has the power tonight, as he’s now apparently He-Man. Days away from Extreme Rules, Rollins needs to be reminded of what extreme is. That’s why he’s facing his former Shield brother, Dean Ambrose, right now.

Dean Ambrose heads down to the ring, but before he gets there, Luke Harper’s music hits. He comes out, and now Ambrose is debating what to do. He charges into the ring after Rollins, only to have J&J jump him. He fights them off until Harper knocks him to the floor. Ambrose throws him into the announce desk, only to have Rollins roll him back into the ring. Ambrose fights him off, but quickly gets attacked from behind by Harper and J&J. They quadruple-team him until Roman Riegns hits the ring. He proceeds to take out everyone before going for the Superman Punch on Rollins. Rollins sees it coming and bails. Reigns turns around into a mule kick by Harper, who then goes for a powerbomb. Reigns escapes, and Ambrose nails Harper. Reigns then drops him with a Superman Punch as Rollins and company throw a fit on the stage. Kane just shakes his head from ringside.

Tonight, Rusev faces Ryback. I guess someone on creative remembered that these two were feuding at one point, only to never have a real match.

MATCH 2: DOLPH ZIGGLER AND NEVILLE VS. BAD NEWS BARRETT AND SHEAMUS
We get an inset promo from Ziggler and Neville. Ziggler says at Extreme Rules, after he beats Sheamus, he gets to make the big fella pucker up and kiss his own arse. But first, he is teaming up with the “Man That Gravity Forgot”. Neville says tonight, they cut a couple bullies down to size.

Sheamus comes out and has a mic. He says their opponents are the underdogs of WWE. Underdogs, and undersized. Now, it’s an insult that people compare Ziggler and Neville to real men like them. It’s a fantasy. Size matters, and underdogs never win. Where’s the rest of Neville? As for Ziggler, this Sunday, he’ll bring Ziggler a step ladder so he won’t have to stand on his tippy-toes when he has to kiss Sheamus’ arse.

Finally, the bell rings, with Neville and Sheamus starting. Sheamus throws Neville to the corner, but Neville comes back with kicks to the leg. Neville avoids a corner whip, flips across the ring, hits a pair of boots and sends Sheamus to the floor with a hurricanrana. BNB charges in, and gets low-bridged. Neville wipes them both out with a twisting suicide dive as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, BNB is now legal for his team, and he has Neville in a rear chinlock. Neville gets back to his feet, but BNB hits him with a kneelift. In the corner now, BNB misses a running boot. He tags in Sheamus, who prevents Neville from tagging out by dropping a knee to the back. He hits the release vertical suplex, then follows up with another one. He picks Neville up, hits him with a knee, then starts screaming in his face. Neville comes back with an enziguri, then crawls for a tag. BNB and Ziggler both tag in. Ziggler ducks a clothesline, hits one of his own, follows up with a corner splash and ends the sequence with a neckbreaker. The Shot to the Heart connects for 2. He misses the rocker dropper, ducks a big boot and hits the leaping DDT for 2. Ziggler nails Sheamus on the apron, but then runs into the Wasteland by BNB for 2. BNB signals for the Bull Hammer, but Ziggler ducks and goes fo rthe superkick. BNB blocks it and goes for the Winds of Change. Ziggler quickly counters that into a crucifix for 2. BNB charges at him in the corner, only to get hit by Neville on the apron. Ziggler hits the Zig-Zag after a quick tag to Neville, who goes up and hits the Red Arrow as Ziggler takes out Sheamus on the floor, and that’s good enough for 3.

WINNERS: NEVILLE AND DOLPH ZIGGLER.

We get a video for the return of WWE Tough Enough. This is coupled with clips of a bunch of dipsh*ts pretending to be wrestlers, including this horrendous girl who looks to be about 13 that goes by the YouTube handle lugeyps3. You want your IQ to drop immediately? Listen to just a few seconds of any of her 8000 “commentary” videos on there. Oh, and one other girl says it would be great to get in the ring with Brie Bella. That should tell you all you need to know (if the fact that the track record for contestants in WWE is pathetic didn’t already do the job).

Bray Wyatt appears on the screen. He says your streak is just an illusion, like everything else. But you can’t fool him. He sees right through you. He knows what drives you. He knows what motivates you, because it’s the same for every man. It’s the fear. You can’t help it. It runs through you. It’s ingrained in your genetic composition. And he will soon expose you for the weakling you are. He will take that one thing from you that you cannot live without. Tell him, friend. After all, what use is there for a butterfly with no wings?

MATCH 3: NATALYA VS. NAOMI
The two lock up, and Naomi backs Nattie into the ropes, where she hits a kneelift and a forearm to the back. Off an Irish whip, Nattie blocks a hiptoss and hits one of her own. She ducks a clothesline and hits a modified side-Russian legsweep before attacking Naomi against the bottom rope. Naomi pulls Nattie face-first into the middle buckle, then catapults her underneath the bottom rope for 2. Naomi hits a forearm to the face, then applies a rear chinlock. Nattie gets to her feet, and Naomi hits her with a kneelift. She follows up with a bodyslam and elbow before missing a legdrop. Nattie ducks a clothesline and hits a slingshot atomic drop before stepping over Naomi’s head and hitting a seated dropkick for 2. Naomi avoids a corner whip and goes for headscissors, and Nattie tosses her to the apron. Naomi hits a high kick to the face, then follows up with a slingshot sunset flip. Nattie rolls through and goes for the Sharpshooter, but Naomi breaks it with a slap to the face. She avoids a corner splash and hits the Rear View for 3.

WINNER: NAOMI.

After the match, Naomi talks some trash to Nattie, then kicks Nattie in the ribs.

We get another promo with the Prime-Time Players. Titus O’Neil says they’ve addressed all of the other tag teams, but still need confirmation on where they can find Los Matadores, those Puerto Rican bullfighters. Finally, someone said it! Onto the next team, the champions, Cesaro and Tyson Kidd. He says they’re great athletes, and Cesaro is one of the most interesting characters on the WWE roster. He’s interesting because he’s uhh…Darren Young says it’s because he’s German. Titus corrects him and says he’s Swiss, which is the same, but different. Two things that make him interesting: his beret and his bag. Young calls it a purse, then reads a poem about Kidd, mocking him with juvenile fart and p*ssy/cat jokes. Titus calls the PTP the best team in the company, future champs, and worth millions of dollars. You know what comes next.

Rusev and Lana are in the ring. Lana says there is an American phrase that says, “Knowledge is power.” This past Monday on RAW, Rusev educated John Cena on the true power of the Russian chain. We see a still as Lana says Cena struggled and tried, but yet again, failed. The Russian chain has protected Russia’s most valuable treasures and secured the most dangerous criminals for generations. But this Sunday, at Extreme Rules, Cena will be chained to the “Super Athlete”, where the chain will destroy America’s last great hope. Rusev tells Cena that, on Sunday, he won’t be able to escape. The chain is a handicap for him, but a weapon and tool for Rusev to drag his body around the ring as he exposes Cena’s failure to the world. He is America’s champion and this is Rusev’s world. He promises Cena will beg for mercy, and he also promises no mercy will be shown. And tonight, the “Big Guy” Ryback is going to join the list of fallen Americans.

MATCH 4: RUSEV (W/LANA) VS. RYBACK
Rusev talks some trash, and now the two lock up. They jockey for position until Rusev hits a kneelift. He clubs Ryback down with double axe handles, then kicks him a few times before applying a side headlock. Ryback counters with a back suplex, then hits Rusev with some headbutts. He follows up with shoulder thrusts in the corner, then nails a big chop. Rusev comes back with some punches and sends Ryback across the ring. Ryback explodes out of the corner with a shoulder for 1. He applies an arm wringer, but Rusev comes back with another kneelift. He goes for a suplex, but Ryback counters with a delayed vertical. Rusev rolls to the floor, and Ryback follows. He nails a right and rolls Rusev back in. Rusev avoids a shoulder in the corner, sending Ryback shoulder-first into the post and down to the floor. Rusev heads out and rams him back-first into the post. He rolls Ryback in as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, Ryback breaks a waistlock attempt, but then gets sent face-first into the buckles. Ryback fights his way out of a bearhug moments later, hits a back elbow out of the corner, avoids a corner splash, hits a boot, then a series of rights. Ryback hits a couple of forearms, then hits a spinning belly-to-belly out of the corner for 2. Ryback goes for the Warrior Splash, but Rusev blocks with his knees. Ryback hits another boot out of the corner, then catches an incoming Rusev with a powerslam for 2. Ryback misses the Meat Hook, but then blocks a thrust kick and hits a standing spinebuster. He calls for the Meat Hook again and connects for 2. Ryback sets up Shell Shocked, only to have Rusev escape and bail to the floor. Ryback goes after him, only to get hit in the gut with Rusev’s chain, leading to the DQ.

WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: RYBACK.

Rusev continues the assault, wrapping the chain around his arm and nailing Ryback in the back of the head. He stomps Ryback in the back, then locks in the Accolade while pulling the chain across Ryback’s face. He rolls into the ring, chain still in-hand. Lana places his medal around his neck, and then the Russian flag drops from the ceiling.

We see Seth Rollins with J&J, and they’re apparently looking for Luke Harper. Jamie Noble says he’s Harper is his cousing, then makes inbred jokes. Harper surprises them, and Noble just wants to make sure they’re on the same page, and that he needs to do whatever Rollins tells him. Harper stares off into space as Rollins lectures him. Joey Mercury taps him on the shoulder, then makes a bunch of hand gestures. Harper grabs him by the collar and says Mercury broke his concentration. He was busy thinking of all the way he was going to hurt Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns. Pain is his specialty. Don’t get in his way.

The New Day come out for Kofi Kingston’s one-on-one match. On a side note, did Xavier Woods piss someone off? He almost never gets a match of any kind. Anyway, Big E grabs a mic and says there is a plague in the WWE Universe, and it’s a lack of positivity and smiling. A lack of embracing the one next to you. And worst of all, a lack of clapping. Woods says one of the main problems is that the tag champs refuse to embrace this type of positive message. But have no fear, New Day is here! They’re like medicine: they might not taste good going down (Nope. Not going to do it), but they’ll cure whatever problem you have. Kofi says when they become the champs, the entire WWE Universe can get back to doing what the world needs more of, clapping. They clap to keep the faces smiling, to keep the WWE Universe positive, and so they can embrace the New Day.

MATCH 5: KOFI KINGSTON (W/BIG E AND XAVIER WOODS) VS. WWE TAG TEAM CO-CHAMPION CESARO (W/TYSON KIDD)
Kofi quickly goes for a roll-up, getting 1. He hits Cesaro with a dropkick, then gets some moral support from his partner. Off a side headlock, the two crisscross until Cesaro catches Kofi in mid-air and puts him down with a backbreaker. In the corner, Kofi hits the Pendulum, then nails a cross-body, right into some punches. Kofi applies a sleeper, but Cesaro escapes and hits a spinebuster. He goes for the Cesaro Swing, but is distracted by Woods on the apron. Kidd pulls him down and sends him to the floor. E steps in and hits Kidd with an overhead belly-to-belly at ringside. Cesaro dropkicks E through the ropes, but then turns around into Trouble in Paradise for 3.

WINNER: KOFI KINGSTON.

We get a backstage interview with Big Show. He’s whining about Roman Reigns not paying his dues. At Extreme Rules, he’ll expose Reigns for what he is: beneath Show.

MATCH 6: DEAN AMBROSE AND ROMAN REIGNS VS. LUKE HARPER AND WWE WORLD CHAMPION SETH ROLLINS (W/J&J SECURITY)
As both teams are in the ring, Kane comes out. He’s apparently going to sit at ringside. Harper and Ambrose start, with Harper backing Ambrose into the corner. They switch positions a few times until Ambrose gets whipped across the ring. He avoids contact, blocks a kick and hits a dragon screw. Ambrose hangs Harper’s leg on the ropes and hits a seated dropkick before tagging in Reigns. Reigns kicks Harper in the corner, then nails a clothesline off a corner whip. Ambrose tags back in, and he snaps off a few jabs before hitting a snapmare, a low clothesline and a power drive elbow. Harper comes back with punches and an uppercut before tagging in Rollins. Rollins hits a hip throw. Ambrose gets back to his feet and tries to escape a side headlock, which he does, off a back suplex. He ducks a clothesline and begins laying into Rollins in the corner. Reigns tags in and nails an uppercut. Reigns connects with a suplex for 1, then applies an arm wringer. Rollins gets corner-whipped, but blocks the charge. He clubs Reigns across the back of the head, then drives him down with a front chancery. Reigns powers his way back up and throws Rollins onto his face. Ambrose tags in and hits a pair of chops to the throat, followed by a forearm in the corner. Rollins blocks a bulldog attempt, but then gets nailed in the corner. Ambrose goes up for possibly a moonsault, but then gets crotched. Rollins shoves him to the floor, and Ambrose takes a nasty spill, nearly colliding with the ring steps. Rollins distracts the referee, which allows J&J to double-team Ambrose, followed by Harper dropping him with a big boot. Commercials.

Back from the break, Rollins hits a Sling Blade for 2, then locks in a body scissors. Ambrose breaks free and catapults Rollins into the corner. Harper tags himself in and clotheslines Ambrose from behind. Ambrose comes back with a boot out of the corner and follows up with a tornado DDT. Harper recovers first and tags in Rollins, who nails Ambrose with rights to the side of the head. Rollins smacks Ambrose around until Ambrose surprises him with a quick punch. Rollins responds by peppering him with rights and hitting a pair of short-arm clotheslines. He goes for a third, but Ambrose ducks, and the two collide off the ropes with simultaneous cross-body attempts. Harper and Reigns tag in, and Reigns nails a few clotheslines before hitting a few more in the corner. Harper ducks another, then gets hit with a Samoan drop. Rollins comes in, and Reigns puts him down with a tilt-a-whirl powerslam. Back to Harper, Reigns hits him with what kind of starts as a Saito suplex, but then gets turned into a powerbomb. That’s the best way I can describe it, anyway. Reigns loads up the Superman Punch, only to have J&J jump on the apron and cause a distraction. Reigns puts them both down at the same time with a single Superman Punch, only to have Harper roll him up in a schoolboy. He rolls through, however, and levels Harper with another Superman Punch for 2 as Rollins breaks it up. Ambrose takes Rollins out with a flying elbow, then low-bridges Harper to the floor. He hits Harper with a suicide dive, only to have Harper catch him and throw him back-first into the apron. Harper then throws him into the timekeeper’s area before turning around into a running clothesline by Reigns. Reigns rolls him back in and signals for the spear. Rollins tries to come back in, so Reigns knocks him to the floor with an uppercut. He turns around into a superkick by Harper, followed by another one off the ropes that gets 2. Rollins tags in and heads to the top rope, where he hits a flying knee for 2. He calls for Harper, who tags himself in as Reigns gets powerbombed into the buckles. Harper then nails a discus clothesline, but it’s only good for 2 as Ambrose breaks it up. Ambrose rolls to his corner and looks for a tag, which he gets as Rollins also tags in. Ambrose dives off the top rope, over Rollins, who then hits a mule kick. He kicks Ambrose into the ropes, only to have Ambrose rebound with a clothesline. Ambrose goes for Dirty Deeds, but breaks it when Harper runs in. He low-bridges Harper, then backdrops Rollins to the outside as well. Ambrose heads up top and hits Rollins, Harper, and J&J with a flying elbow. At this point, Kane finally stands up at ringside. He rolls Rollins in to break the count, but Ambrose rolls back in as well, behind Rollins’ back. Rollins doesn’t realize it and celebrates like he won. Meanwhile, Reigns tags himself in and hits Rollins with a spear for 3.

WINNERS: DEAN AMBROSE AND ROMAN REIGNS.

End of show.
WWE: It’s good to be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

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WWE Brand Split: Could It Ever Happen Again?

April 24, 2015 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

The brand split in 2002 was a great idea of Vince McMahon’s in many ways. From a business and financial standpoint, it created more merchandise sales and would have caused more people to watch both programs to see what happened. The brand split also allowed more superstars to be put in the spotlight, Brock Lesnar being an example before he moved to SmackDown. I have thought about this subject a lot, about whether RAW and SmackDown should once again be separate entities rather than sharing rosters.

Points For:

Having the brand split would arguably be the more entertaining option due to the increased number of storylines and each General Manager (GM) or creative team would want to one up each other, probably leading to more compelling television. Paul Heyman as SmackDown comes to mind when the blue brand was arguably challenging RAW, if not beating it. SmackDown nowadays is always seen as the secondary show. A pre-taped event that will always play second fiddle to the mega-power RAW. That could all change with a few great superstars and some good booking decisions. The superstars aren’t always there though, not all the top stars compete on SmackDown. A few weeks ago, WWE advertised a “star-studded SmackDown” which featured Randy Orton, John Cena and Roman Reigns. You shouldn’t have to advertise your best stars as a special event for one of your two main shows.

As I mentioned earlier, the brand split would provide more opportunities for superstars and divas lower down the card. Currently, men like Luke Harper, Dean Ambrose and Stardust are left with no particular direction as well as women like Emma and Layla who have been relegated to Main Event. Less people means more chances for the superstars and divas remaining. That will create feuds with more attention drawn on them which will also mean more excitement for the match when it rolls around. Putting competitors in the spotlight will also give them vital experience for the time when the brands merge together again. Knowing whether somebody can handle a title or the main event is a crucial part of giving the push the go-ahead.

In the last paragraph, I mentioned Emma and Layla being relegated to Main Event, which is often considered a “jobber” show. This obviously wasn’t the original concept of Main Event but WWE’s failure to utilize the show for useful purposes has led to that conception. This week’s Main Event featured Layla vs Emma, Xavier Woods vs Jimmy Uso and, a match that goes against my earlier point, Dolph Ziggler vs Rusev. That is an unappetizing clash of two tag team members that don’t currently have a storyline, two divas with no direction and a pretty stellar main event. With more matches like the previous main event, Main Event could turn into a show worthwhile watching.

Arguments Against:

Maybe in the future but can the current WWE roster handle a brand split? The roster has talent, don’t get me wrong, but I just don’t think that there is enough there. There are currently 48 superstars (give or take a few) under contract with the WWE (not including divas). That would mean 24 superstars per brand which probably isn’t enough to fill in 2 hours of TV a week whilst still maintaining great quality and variety in matches. Repeated contests results in a lack of audience interest which can eventually lead to less merchandise sales and less money. We know Vince McMahon doesn’t like less money, don’t we?

Although this point may not be as important as the other one, no “fantasy matches” could be created. This means that most superstars will face each other, no more what-ifs will be left. Many wrestling articles I read write about what would happen if two superstars from the same or different eras met in the ring. Many SmackDown vs RAW dream matches would be reserved for PPVs or never happen at all. It is just a little thing that the WWE Universe wouldn’t need to worry about.

In Conclusion:

I think that the brand split would be a great idea because of the competition and entertainment. It would force the WWE to step up their game to entertain the fans and keep them glued to the screen for the two main shows a week as well as their minor shows. It would intrigue me to see what internal competition would do to the creative teams and wrestlers. However much we may entertain the idea, I’m more than confident that the WWE will not bring back the brand extension (in the near future anyways).

What do you think? Let me know in the comments below.

WWE: It’s good to be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

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WWE SmackDown Results and April 16 Recap

April 18, 2015 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week, the show emanates from London, England. Kicking off the show is the WWE United States Champion, John Cena. After a clip of him being attacked by a chain-wielding Rusev on RAW, Cena thanks London for hosting WWE. The energy from the crowd made RAW memorable, and admist that energy, we found out that Rusev will face Cena in a Russian chain match for the US title at Extreme Rules, which is the same damn thing as a dog collar match, a strap match, etc. Cena says the match won’t be pretty and may not even involve him. Every time he issues the US Open Challenge, you have a chance to see a new champion. So, enough about RAW and Extreme Rules. This is Smackdown, and there will be another challenge right now.

Cesaro, Tyson Kidd and Natalya come out. Kidd says they’re not out here to accept the challenge. What they are out here for is to drop some facts. Cesaro says they are the greatest champions in WWE today. Fact. Kidd says they don’t pander to the audience. Fact. Cesaro says Cena came out on RAW and said London deserves a Wrestlemania. Fact. Kidd says that wasn’t a fact. London doesn’t deserve WM. Fact. Cesaro says there were great chants on RAW. Fact. Kidd’s personal favorite was “Please retire”, but it was directed at the wrong person. Fact. Cesaro says everyone wishes they could not see Cena. Fact. Kidd says, instead, they want to see Kidd and Cesaro. Fact. Cena says that the fans don’t want to see him, but do want to see the tag champs, how about one of them step aside and the other fight him right now?

Intercontinental Champion Daniel Bryan heads down to the ring and says he heard some talk about the greatest champions in WWE today. Do the fans think Cesaro and Kidd are the greatest today? Resounding boos, followed by a “Yes!” chant. Bryan asks if it’s Cena, and we get more boos. He then asks if he’s the most handsome man in WWE. Mixed reaction. So, instead of Kidd and Cesaro running their mouths, why don’t they prove it against the US and IC Champions? Big “Yes!” chant in response. The tag champs discuss it before Nattie gets in the faces of Cena and Bryan. Kidd pulls her back before saying the match is on.

Later tonight, Neville will face Sheamus. Bray Wyatt is also in action.

MATCH 1: R-TRUTH VS. BRAY WYATT
The two go into a lock-up, and Truth gets backed into the corner before quickly sliding away. He lands a few rights on Wyatt and applies a side headlock. Truth ducks a clothesline and hits the Lie Detector. After some dancing, Truth stops when Wyatt starts crab-walking. He charges in, and Wyatt drops him with an uppercut. Wyatt drives his knees into Truth’s head as the crowd starts singing. He goes for a uranage, but Truth escapes and goes for the axe kick. He misses, ducks a right, then gets blasted with a flying back elbow. Wyatt hits Sister Abigail and gets 3.

WINNER: BRAY WYATT.

We get another “exclusive” sit-down interview, this time with Roman Reigns. I am so sick of these, and not just with Reigns; with everyone. He blathers on beating the Big Show, also known as a feud absolutely no one wanted.

The Miz is in the ring. Last Monday on RAW, Damien Mizdow got lucky, and he promises it will never happen again. Everyone knows Mizdow is nothing without the Miz. He made Mizdow who he is today. He made Mizdow who he is, because that’s what he does: he makes things. He made Mizdow, he made Summer Rae, he made the Marine 4 in a soon-to-be success, and he made each and every one of the fans.

Hometown boy Bad News Barrett comes out to a respectable pop. He says Miz is confused. We’re not in the wretched Hollywood; we’re in London. The WWE Universe hasn’t come out to see a pretend movie star; they’ve come to see the man from the UK, the man who is going to crush the Yes! Movement at Extreme Rules and become a 6-time IC Champion.

MATCH 2: THE MIZ VS. BAD NEWS BARRETT
Miz’s pre-match shtick is just the f**king worst. As he’s doing it, BNB just stares him down, turns the elbow pad inside out when Miz isn’t looking, and knocks his ass out with a Bull Hammer when he turns around for 3.

WINNER: BAD NEWS BARRETT.

Renee Young is standing by with Damien Mizdow and Summer Rae. This combination sucks. Mizdow didn’t need Rae to get over, and Rae? She couldn’t get over if she was riding a guy in a porn movie. Young asks how it felt to get a win over Miz on RAW. Mizdow says it’s like walking outside and the sun is shining, it feels like a bright summer…Rae. She points out the kiss last week, and that’s when Miz interrupts. He tells Young to leave, then tells Mizdow the win was a fluke, and he wants a rematch. He also wants Mizdow to go back to being Damien Sandow. Stop dressing like Miz, using his entrance theme, etc. There’s only one Miz. Rae says everyone knows Mizdow does the Miz better than the Miz. Sweet Jebus, she’s awful. Miz says he’s the original, and Mizdow begins to do his stunt-double bit again, which pisses Miz off. Rae whispers in Mizdow’s ear, and Mizdow says let’s have a rematch on RAW, with the winner getting the rights to the entire Miz brand. Rae does some hideous whining bit before trying (and failing miserably) to look sexy. Miz says on RAW, Mizdow will wind up in the unemployment line, and Rae can go back to the lingerie football league, wearing a helmet, which will be an improvement in her case. Wow. I actually agree with the Miz on something. Anyway, she slaps him, and Mizdow feigns getting slapped as well. Miz storms off, and Miz says that was awesome.

MATCH 3: SHEAMUS VS. NEVILLE
Before the match, Sheamus says he thought Neville would be taller, but he’s just a teeny, tiny little man, just like all the other undersized superstars. Where is he from? That’s right: Newcastle, England. In case he didn’t know, Sheamus is from Ireland. The REAL Ireland, and where he comes from, they don’t like English bastards, which means he really doesn’t like Neville. Neville stares him dow and puts in a mouth guard as the bell rings.

Neville avoids a couple lock-up attempts before Sheamus backs him into the corner and talks some trash. Neville shoves him, which gets him a boot to the gut. Neville slides unders his legs and hits a dropkick. He kicks Sheamus in the leg, flips out of a corner whip, hits a pair of boots in the corner and sends Sheamus to the floor with a running hurricanrana. Neville wipes Sheamus out with a twisting suicide dive, then rolls him back in. Neville goes up top for the Red Arrow, but Sheamus drops to the floor. Neville charges after him, but gets hit with a tilt-a-whirl powerslam at ringside. Commercials.

Back from the break, Sheamus has Neville in a rear chinlock. Neville tries to get up, but Sheamus yanks him right back down. Neville eventually does get back up and tries to break free, but Sheamus stops that with a kneelift. He hits a shoulder thrust in the corner, then drops Neville with a release vertical suplex. Sheamus goes for the Irish Curse, which connects. Neville pulls himself back up, so Sheamus yanks him down with a rake of the eyes before going into a rear chinlock. Neville counters with a jawbreaker before running into a back elbow. He avoids a shoulder thrust in the corner, which sends Sheamus to the floor. Sheamus rolls back in, where Neville meets him with a series of kicks and a running boot to the side of the head. He hits a standing SSP for 2, and now Sheamus is in the corner. He kicks Neville in the knee, then pulls himself up and tosses Neville to the outside. Neville lands on the apron, which sets him up for the 10 Beats of the Bodhran. Neville elbows his way out, however, then nails Sheamus with a forearm. He avoids a kick through the ropes, kicks Sheamus in the side of the knee, then hits a springboard seated dropkick for 2. In the corner, Neville nails a huge kick to the head. He goes up top and hits a Phoenix Splash from the middle rope for 2. He goes up for the Red Arrow, but Sheamus crotches him. Sheamus hoists him up for the rolling fireman’s carry, but Neville counters into a sunset flip for 2. Neville hits a step-up enziguri, then does it again on the ropes before clotheslining Sheamus to the floor. Outside, Neville grabs him in a front chancery, but Sheamus picks him up and throws him face-first onto the announce desk, leading to the DQ.

WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: NEVILLE.

Sheamus isn’t done. He drags Neville to the floor, then picks him up on his shoulder and walks him back into the ring, where he hits a standing powerslam over the ropes. Sheamus drops a series of knees until Dolph Ziggler runs down and attacks Sheamus from behind. He pelts Sheamus with rights until Sheamus rolls out of the ring and heads up the ramp. Ziggler gets on a mic and says he gets why Sheamus doesn’t like the English, because they don’t like him, either. Come to think of it, neither do the Germans, Hungarians, Dutch, Welsh, millennials, bronies, you name it. Not even the Irish like him. You know why? Because Sheamus is nothing but a bully, and there’s only one thing to do to a bully, and that’s stand up to him. That’s what Ziggler is doing right now, and he wants Sheamus in the ring right now. From the stage, Sheamus calls Ziggler adorable, and a little man speaking big words. Sheamus tells him to “kiss me arse”. He walks away, but Ziggler eggs him on. Ziggler turns around and says he meant that literally. In two weeks at Extreme Rules, they are going to compete in a “Kiss Me Arse” match, which means that, in front of the world, he will humiliate Ziggler by making him kiss his arse. Ziggler doesn’t care; he just wants the match. He is going to stretch Sheamus so bad, he won’t know which way is up. Then, in front of the world, he’ll make Sheamus kiss his own arse.

Crap. I can’t believe they’re dusting this match off again. Does no one remember Rock/Mr. Ass or Rikishi/A-Train?

MATCH 4: LOS MATADORES (DIEGO AND FERNANDO, W/EL TORITO) VS. BIG E AND KOFI KINGSTON (W/XAVIER WOODS)
The New Day comes out, and the crowd are still dumping all over them. Big E says they’re here to bring foggy London sunshine and light. Kofi Kingston says they don’t get bent out of shape when they’re told they suck. They clap so they don’t snap. They’re going to clap on and on and on and on and on. Xavier Woods says to make today your New Day (Sucks!).

Does WWE have beef with Woods? Why is he always the corner man? Anyway, E starts with one of the Matadores. The Matador ducks a shot and hits a few chops. E steamrolls him, throws him to the corner and tags in Kofi, who he then slingshots into the corner for a low dropkick for 2. Matador comes back witha jawbreaker, but then gets tripped. Kofi heads to the top for a springboard, but gets caught mid-air with a dropkick. The other Matador tags in and hits a chop from the top before knocking E off the apron. Avoids a shot in the corner by Kofi and hits a jumping back elbow. He hits another one, then goes for a corner whip. Kofi reverses, but the Matador springs off the ropes and hits a somersault plancha for 2 as E breaks it up. The other Matador comes in and puts E on the floor with a hurricanrana. Kofi hits the illegal Matador with Trouble in Paradise, sending him to the floor as well. The legal Matador rolls Kofi up for 2. In the corner, Kofi hits a Pendulum. Torito jumps on the apron, so Woods pulls him down into a fireman’s carry and begins marching him around the ring. Torito spins out into an armdrag. Kofi is distracted, so the Matador goes for a Backstabber. However, E is holding onto Kofi from the apron, resulting in the move being blocked. E tags in, and he & Kofi hit their combination Big Ending/leaping DDT from the middle rope for 3.

WINNERS: BIG E AND KOFI KINGSTON.

We see Rosa Mendes and Fandango in the back. She whines at him in Spanish, and he says this is the end of them. Rosa needs to move on and let the whole world Fandango. He kisses her hand and leaves her crying. That’s when the Exotic Express runs by, doing their stupid chant. Adam Rose stops and says it’s a shame, because when he looks at her, he sees her for what she is, and if she makes the right move, she might once again be #1 in a certain somebody’s life. Think about it.

The Big Show comes out for, oh, who the hell really cares at this point? If you really want to know, though, he says it was made obvious on RAW that people from England suck. Englishmen don’t appreciate him. He’s the greatest giant in history. He can do what he wants, when he wants, and no one can stop. No on in the arena in the arena can stop him, no in the country can stop him, no one in the world can stop him. Not even Roman Reigns can stop him. The fans respect Reigns because he went toe-to-toe with Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania, right? Show respects what he did at WM, but this past Monday, Reigns was disrespectful to Show. Show doesn’t answer to anyone but the Authority. Some people in the Authority think Reigns is a threat. He doesn’t see Reigns as a threat, but a victim of an automobile crash. When he threw Reigns like a flyweight into the car on the stage, it was the car getting hit by the person. We go back to RAW to see that event. Back to the arena, Show thought Reigns would be smart and stay down, but he got back up, so Show through him into the car again. Another clip. Back to Show, when he thought Reigns would finally stay down, he got up again. Reigns doesn’t get that he can’t stop Show, so Show drove his knee into Reigns’ skull. Another clip. Back to Show. He then picked Reigns up, threw him onto the roof, then chokeslammed him onto it. Another clip, this time in slow-motion. Show is now sitting on the car. He thought the chokeslam would be it, but during the commercials, Reigns got up again. Yet another clip. God, this segment sucks. Back to Show. Reigns made it to the back, stumbling and bumbling. He then makes a joke about the Brits having bad teeth, despite the fact that it’s been scientifically documented that British teeth are generally in much better shape than those of Americans. Show couldn’t be bother to do two minutes of research to find that out though, and instead had to go with an old stereotype that is complete horsesh*t. Show could have continued the attack, but chose not to, because he didn’t have to. Instead, he went to the Authority and made a request: at Extreme Rules, he will face Reigns in a last man standing match. When he’s done with Reigns, Reigns won’t be the last man standing. Respect that.

MATCH 5-TRIPLE THREAT MATCH: NATALYA VS. ALICIA FOX VS. CAMERON
Poor Nattie, having to make these two look good. Nattie and Fox go after Cameron, and she rolls to the floor. Fox rolls Nattie up for 2. Nattie goes for the Sharpshooter, but Fox rolls to the apron. Nattie knocks her to the floor with a forearm. Cameron comes back in and tries to roll Nattie up, getting 2. Nattie hits her with a clothesline as Fox gets back into the ring and breaks up a pin at 1. Fox sends Nattie into the ropes, rolls backwards and hits a spinning headscissors, followed by a back elbow. She goes for the flipping legdrop, but misses. Nattie walks over the back of her neck and hits a seated dropkick for 2 as Cameron pulls her to the floor. Cameron shoves her into the barricade, then gets back into the ring. She hits Fox with a couple of forearms before Fox hits a big boot for 2. Cameron gets sent to the corner, where she avoids another big boot. Cameron snaps Fox down by her hair, then goes up top. Nattie tries to pull her down, but gets a kick to the face. Fox meets Cameron on the middle rope and looks for a superplex. Nattie gets back and puts them both down with a powerbomb (Tower of Doom-type spot). Nattie covers Cameron for 2, then Fox does the same. Nattie rolls Fox up for 2, then hits her with a discus clothesline. She rolls Fox to the apron and kicks her to the floor, then goes after Cameron, who sneaks in a roll-up for 2. Nattie ducks a clothesline and goes for a waistlock. Cameron counters into a victory roll for 2. Nattie counters into a roll-up for 2. Cameron counters again into another victory roll for 2. Nattie gets up, trips Cameron and locks in the Sharpshooter. Cameron tries to get to the ropes, so Nattie pulls her back to the middle of the ring. Fox comes in and tries to break up the hold with an axe kick, but Nattie sees it coming and moves. She then ducks a clothesline, hits a double-leg, then applies the Sharpshooter on Fox. Cameron comes back in and breaks up the hold with a double axe-handle on Nattie. She tries to throw Nattie to the floor, but Nattie reverses and sends Cameron flying. Fox gets back up, hits Nattie with a running big boot, then hits her atrociously bad axe kick. Cameron back in, and she throws Fox to the floor before pinning Nattie for 3.

WINNER: CAMERON.

After the match, Fox throws a fit as Cameron looks at herself in a compact mirror. I don’t know or care why on either end.

MATCH 6: ADAM ROSE (W/THE EXOTIC EXPRESS) VS. FANDANGO
Fandango is back to his old entrance theme as we have to sit through this match yet again. Apparently, he’s a face now. Rose applies a side headlock, then hits a shoulder off the ropes. The two crisscross until Fandango hits a dropkick before clotheslining Rose and his 80’s jobber tights to the floor. Fandango follows up with a slingshot plancha. He rolls Rose back in as Rosa Mendes runs to ringside. Fandango and Mendes argue, and the distraction is enough for Rose to knock Fandango down with a baseball slide. He rolls Fandango back in, then flirts with Mendes. Back in the ring, Rose stomps Fandango in the corner, and now Mendes is on the apron. Rose walks to her, and Fandango comes in from behind and rolls him up for 3.

WINNER: FANDANGO.

Fandango dances on the announce desk as Mendes leaves, upset.

The screen cuts to Bray Wyatt. What happens when it all just fades away? Dedication to yourself can only take you so far. Eventually, you will be left alone, owning nothing but your own regret. Hey. You wanna hear a secret? You should be more careful, friend. Because the Reaper walks in the daylight. *laughter* Run!

MATCH 7-ALL-CHAMPIONS TAG TEAM MATCH: INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION DANIEL BRYAN AND WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPION JOHN CENA VS. WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS CESARO AND TYSON KIDD (W/NATALYA)
Cena, sporting a shiner, starts off with Kidd. Cena applies a side headlock, then hits a shoulder off the ropes. Kidd tags out to Cesaro, who goes for a test of strength with Cena. He puts Cena down to his knees, but Cena gets back up, breaks the hold and applies an arm wringer. He goes for a tag, but Cesaro yanks him down. He hits a European uppercut, then tags in Kidd, who nails several forearms. Kidd tags out, and Cesaro stomps Cena down before applying a front chancery, turning it into a modified armbar. He throws Cena to the corner and hits a running European uppercut. Kidd tags in and stomps Cena before hitting an elbow to the forehead. Kidd applies a front chancery now, but Cena breaks free and hits a right. Off the ropes, Cena runs into a spinning heel kick for 2. Kidd foot-chokes Cena near the ropes, then hits a slingshot legdrop on the apron. Cesaro tags out, prevents a tag on the other side by grabbing Cena’s foot, then gets booted to the floor. Cena crawls for the tag to Bryan, but Cesaro knocks Bryan off the apron with a kneelift. He then hits Cena with a deadlift gutwrench for 2 before applying a rear chinlock. Cena gets to his feet and reaches for a tag, then counters the hold with a back suplex. Cena pulls himself up in the corner, avoids a running shoulder thrust, tosses an incoming Kidd to the floor, then begins his crawl to the corner. Cesaro tries to stop him, only to have Kidd yank Bryan off the apron just as Cena was about to make it. Cena manages to lock in the STF a moment later, but the referee is checking on Bryan on the outside. This allows Kidd to come in and break up the hold. Kidd tags in, and Cena immediately goes for the AA. Kidd lands on his feet, hits a spinning back kick and drops Cena with a running seated dropkick for 2. He goes for another shot on Bryan, but Bryan blocks it and hits a right, sending Kidd into a back-body drop from Cena. Cena makes a diving tag to Bryan, and Bryan ducks a clothesline from Kidd before hitting Cesaro in the corner. He turns back to Kidd, pelting him with rights in the corner. Bryan flips off a corner whip, ducks a clothesline, kicks Cesaro (who is now on the floor) through the ropes, then hits a drop toehold on Kidd, sending him face-first into the middle buckle. Bryan hits the corner Yes! Kicks, then sets Kidd up for a super hurricanrana, which connects for 2. Bryan fires up the Yes! Kicks again, then hits an incoming Cesaro with a kick before lighting both up with the Yes! Kicks. He hits Cesaro with the Buzzsaw, only to have Kidd roll him up for 2. Bryan recovers and nails Kidd with a Buzzsaw as well. He signals for the running knee, only to have Natalya jump on the apron and distract him. Kidd tries to attack from behind, but Bryan sees him coming and shoves him into Nattie, sending her flying into the arms of Cesaro at ringside. Bryan then traps Kidd in the Yes! Lock. Cesaro drops Nattie and runs into the ring, only to have Cena intercept him with an Attitude Adjustment as Kidd taps.

WINNERS: DANIEL BRYAN AND JOHN CENA.

End of show.

WWE: It’s good to be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

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WWE SmackDown Results and April 9 Recap

April 11, 2015 By: Category: Videos, WWE | Pro Wrestling

The show opens with Daniel Bryan in the ring, and he says last week was one of his career highlights, when he climbed a ladder in front of 76,000 people and won the IC title at Wrestlemania. But a title only means as much as the actions of the holder, and that goes for any title, including his. So how does he make the IC title mean even more? By defending it with everything he has against anyone who wants to fight for the belt. And he did that the night after WM when he defended it against Dolph Ziggler. But after that match, who should come out? Sheamus. Sheamus came out, looking all stupid. He didn’t congratulate Bryan or even challenge for the title; instead, he kicked Bryan in the face. He then did it even worse to Ziggler, to the point that Ziggler couldn’t compete on the last two shows. So, what did Bryan do? He fought Sheamus last week. During that match, he got knocked to the floor, and he looked up, with blood on his forehead, and he saw Wade Barrett (Yes, Bryan called him Wade). In the middle of all that, what happens?

Bad News Barrett interrupts and says what happened was Bryan’s magical week turned into a nightmare when BNB dropped him with a Bull Hammer.

Sheamus joins BNB on the stage, and says he then kicked Bryan’s head off with a Brogue Kick as a reminder not to pick on someone who’s not your own size. The reason he tolerates BNB is because he’s not a munchkin like Bryan. When he determined how much he detests “undersized insects”, he decided that he and BNB should come down there and give Bryan a European-style arse kicking, because they can. The two head to the ring as Bryan takes off his belt and prepares to fight. Ziggler comes out with a mic and says Sheamus talks a big game for a guy who looks like Captain Jack Sparrow and Carrot Top had a baby that no one liked. And for BNB, maybe the reason he’s so tall is because he and Sheamus’ heads are so far up each other’s arses. They want to fight, let’s do it right now.

Ziggler joins Bryan in the ring and prepares to fight, when the Big Show comes out. I swear, Show is like that kid in high school that just leeched onto other people and whatever they were doing, like “Hey, guys! Me too! I like this stuff, too!” He is just a huge waste of space. Anyway, he says he and Sheamus don’t see eye-to-eye, but he has to agree that he’s sick of these little pipsqueaks whining and complaining all the time. He’s the winner of the Andre battle royal, which means he eclipsed Andre the Giant in history, which means he’s the greatest giant to ever set foot in this business. Ugh. Now, if Sheamus and Mr. Barrett are going to come out here and beat up these munchkins without him, they’re sadly mistaken. All three heels step into the ring, and that’s when Roman Reigns marches down through the crowd. Show tells Reigns not to step into the ring, so Reigns climbs in and immediately tackles him, which then leads to Ziggler tackling Sheamus while Bryan starts nailing BNB with punches. The faces clear the ring, and I’m guessing we’ll get a 6-man later.

“MizTV” is back with a special edition tonight. Also, Neville makes his Smackdown debut.

We get confirmation of the aforementioned 6-man.

Cesaro and Tyson Kidd are in the ring, waiting for their opponents, which will be two members of the New Day. Wow. The crowd here in Dallas,TX immediately starts sh*tting on the New Day once their music hit. As they come down to the ring, Big E tries to start getting a New Day chant going, but instead gets a response of “Sucks!” every time. Xavier Woods looks confused, and E says they come out, clapping for the fans, and they want to chant that New Day sucks. Right now, he wants every fan to stand up and clap. Instead, we get a “New Day sucks!” chant. We may be seeing the first time Kofi Kingston ever goes heel in his career. E says they’re out here bringing positivity to everyone, and the people want to ruin their New Day? Something has got to change. E rolls into the ring and says the fans have got to like them. You’ve got to love them, because they’re here for you. They’re here for a New Day!

MATCH 1: WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS CESARO AND TYSON KIDD (W/NATALYA) VS. BIG E AND KOFI KINGSTON (W/XAVIER WOODS) (NON-TITLE)
You know, I kind of like the fact that the New Day are acknowledging that the fans are supposed to like them but don’t. Kind of breaking the fourth wall a bit there. Kofi and Kidd start the match as a “New Day sucks” chant breaks out. Kofi goes for a waistlock, which Kidd counters. Kofi coutners that as well, only to have Kidd counter and trip Kofi. Kofi goes into a headscissors, but Kidd gets a rope break. Kidd boots Kofi, then nails him with forearms in the corner before hitting a monkey flip. Kofi lands on his feet and ducks a clothesline on the apron from Cesaro. Kidd clubs him from behind and pulls him to the heel corner for a tag. Cesaro comes in and drops him with a European uppercut. My feed cuts away, and when it comes back, E and Kidd are legal, with both men down. Kidd tags out first, and Cesaro prevents E from tagging out with a deadlift gutwrench for 2. Cesaro rakes at E’s face before hitting a series of crossface shots and applying a rear chinlock. Kidd tags back in and kicks E in the chest before driving his foot into E’s face. E rolls under the bottom rope, where Kidd hits him with a slingshot legdrop. Cesaro back in, and he hits a slingshot double-stomp for 2. Cesaro applies a front chancery, putting himself between E and Kofi. E tosses him off, but Cesaro lands on his feet, knocks Kofi off the apron with a back elbow, then avoids a corner charge, sending E shoulder-first into the ring post. Cesaro rolls him up in a schoolboy for 2, then hits the Cesaro Swing as Kofi tries to interfere, only to have the ref cut him off. Cesaro gets 2 before Kofi breaks up the pin. E pulls himself up in the corner and hits Cesaro with a uranage. Kofi and Kidd tag in, with Kofi hitting a springboard clothesline, a couple chops and a dropkick. He hits a jumping clothesline and then hits a Boom Drop. He calls for TIP as the crowd dumps all over him. Cesaro comes in, but Kofi stops him before E reenters the ring. The ref shoves him back to the corner, and as Kofi turns back to Kidd, Kidd catapults him into the ropes, where Cesaro blasts him with a European uppercut from the floor through the top and middle ropes. Kidd puts Kofi down with Just Kidding and gets 3.

WINNERS: CESARO AND TYSON KIDD.

After some commercials, we’re back with Curtis Axel in the ring. He says not to change the channel. Two weeks ago on RAW, the road to Axetreme Rules hit a small speedbump named Neville. But you know what, Axelmaniacs? Axelmania will live forever. That’s why he asked for this rematch tonight. So, Neville, whatcha gonna do when Axelmania runs wild on you?

MATCH 2: CURTIS AXEL VS. NEVILLE
So glad Neville is on the main roster now. I was worried he wouldn’t get the call-up due to his size, and I’m glad I was wrong. An “NXT” chant breaks out as the two lock up. Neville backs Axel into the corner, only for Axel to grab him by the hair and throw him into the ropes. Neville handsprings off, then does a backflip and hits a pair of armdrags before putting Axel down with a spinning back kick. Axel comes back with a knee to the gut, then throws Neville to the corner for some stomps. He grinds his forearm into Neville’s face, then goes for a corner whip. Neville avoids contact, then flips himself across the ring, where he hits Axel with a pair of boots in the opposite corner. Neville goes to the apron, shoulders Axel in the gut, flips over him, then lays in a flying forearm. Neville kicks Axel to the floor, then hits a twisting suicide dive. Back in the ring, Neville hits a bodyslam and heads up top. He hits the Red Arrow and gets 3.

WINNER: NEVILLE.

God. How the hell does he do that move?

Renee Young, looking like she’s wearing a Joker mask, is standing by with Natalya, Cameron and Alicia Fox. One of these things is not like the other. Young says they maybe manipulated Kane into making a divas battle royal next week. Do they think they cheated Naomi (which young pronounces Ny-Oh-Me) out of her number-one contendership. Fox says no one cheated anyone out of anything; they were just trying to show Kane how important #GiveDivasAChance really is. Natalya says Naomi has earned her title match. Cameron laughs and tells Nattie to save it. She’s just happy she has a chance at the divas title as well, but that won’t happen. Come Monday, Cameron is going to win. Fox argues with her and calls herself a veteran, which makes me choke on my own bile. Nattie apparently feels the same way, and says Fox needs to show respect to the divas that came before her. They start shoving each other, as Cameron tries to break it up.

MATCH 3: ALICIA FOX VS. NATALYA (SPECIAL REFEREE: CAMERON)
Nattie hits a double-leg and starts pelting Fox with rights. Fox reverses and gets Nattie to the ropes, only to have Nattie roll to the apron. Nattie gets back to her feet in the ring, and now we get a shoving match. Now they trade slaps. Fox dives at Nattie, only for Nattie to catch her and take her down. They roll around into the ropes again, and Nattie once again ends up on the outside. Back in, Fox hits her with a forearm, then misses a flipping legdrop. Nattie runs over her neck and hits her with a seated dropkick for 2. Fox reverses a corner whip and hits a big boot. Nattie slumps in the corner, and Fox snaps her onto her back for 2. Fox hits a northern lights suplex for 2, aka one of the whole four moves she knows. Fox applies a rear chinlock. Nattie tries to elbow out, so Fox snaps her down by the hair for 2. Fox then goes right back to the rear chinlock. Cameron hasn’t shut the f*ck up this entire match, and she’s not even miked. Nattie elbows her way out, ducks a clothesline, then counters a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker into a cross-body. Fox is back up, and she hits a running clothesline. The two trade forearms until Fox hits a sunset flip out of the corner. Nattie rolls through and locks in the Sharpshooter, and Fox taps out.

WINNER: NATALYA.

After the match, Cameron lays both women out with DDTs, then calls for a mirror. Why does she have a job again?

We get a video package for Erick Rowan, because we’re apparently still supposed to give a damn about him, for reasons that have yet to be explained.

Bray Wyatt comes out, and says he remembers the first time he saw Erick Rowan. He was lost, cast out by a society that could never understand him. They looked at him as if he were some monster, some creature, some plague that could destroy everything this society considers real. But they were wrong, and when they saw all of his flaws, Wyatt saw his possibilities. He took Rowan in. He found him dirty, laying in the mud, and he became the teacher. He showed him what it was liked to be loved, what it was like to have a family, and there was a time Wyatt was proud to call Rowan a brother. He fixed Rowan like you would fix a broken toy. When the time was right, he had no choice. He had to set Rowan free. He had to show Rowan what a cruel, horrible, rotten world they live in, so he could see with his own eyes this was filled with carnivorous insects who want nothing more than to rip you apart because evil is real, and evil is all around us. Evil lives in every single one of you. And what did you do? You returned Rowan back to Wyatt, and he is broken just like he was before, and it’s everyone’s fault. So, he decided tonight would be special, because he wants to teach Rowan one last little lesson. He wants to show Rowan that you can trust no one, that evil inside of us all, and there’s no escaping it. So tonight, he’ll finally destroy Rowan. Now imagine if he could do that to someone he loved, someone he used to call his brother, just imagine what he could do to you. Behold, the new face of fear.

MATCH 4: BRAY WYATT VS. ERICK ROWAN
Rowan comes out, and the crowd goes mild. Wyatt clubs Rowan across the back, so Rowan throws him to the corner. He misses a splash, and Wyatt goes on the attack with punches. Rowan comes back with his own strikes before ramming Wyatt head-first into the buckles. He knocks Wyatt to the floor with a Pounce, only to have Wyatt come back in and lay in some more punches. He pulls Rowan up by the beard, which Rowan doesn’t like. Rowan lays in some headbutts in the corner, then misses a corner charge, hitting the post and falling to the apron. Wyatt sends him into the barricade with a seated dropkick as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, Wyatt has Rowan in a rear chinlock. Rowan fights out, only to get dropped with a DDT for 2. Wyatt goes for a running senton, but Rowan gets his knees up into Wyatt’s back. Both are back up, and Rowan hits a clothesline and an avalanche. He hits another across the ring, then puts Wyatt down with a roundhouse for 2. Rowan goes up top, but Wyatt rolls to the floor on the opposite side. Rowan charges after him, only to have Wyatt clobber him with a clothesline. He hits the running senton on the floor, then rolls Rowan back in. Wyatt goes for a uranage, but Rowan reverses into a full-nelson attempt. Wyatt escapes and explodes off the ropes with a flying back elbow. He bridges up and crab-walks over to Rowan, only to quickly put him down with Sister Abigail for 3.

WINNER: BRAY WYATT.

After the match, Wyatt cradles Rowan’s head in his lap, then looks up at the ceiling and laughs.

Considering Rowan has only one won singles match since the group broke up that I can recall, I’m wondering if they’re going to release him soon.

It’s now time for “MizTV”, and we see a poster for The Marine 4 on the Titan-Tron, because WWE knows no one remembered this movie even existed. Miz calls this a special “movie edition” of the show. His latest film comes out tomorrow on digital HD, and later this month on Blu-Ray and DVD. We are then “treated” to a trailer for the film, which co-stars fellow waste of a human life Summer Rae. Back to the ring, no one cares about the movie. He claims his film has been getting rave reviews from Holly…

Speaking of wastes of human life, here’s Summer Rae herself. She calls this “our” action movie. Miz bitches about interruptions, and tells her she should be privileged, since he’s “giving a diva a chance”. She says she’ll speak whenever she wants, and the crowd still doesn’t care. They argue over who the star is as she desperately tries (and fails) to look sexy. This segment absolutely sucks. Rae tells him Damien Mizdow upstaged him in the Andre battle royal. The fans only care about Mizdow, who isn’t even out here yet. Miz says he blames everyone in the WWE Universe for what has happened with Mizdow. Mizdow is not a leading man. You cheer him and chant his name, but you don’t want Mizdow without Miz. In three months time, you’ll forget his name. Damien Sandow was fired twice from WWE and was on his way out a third time until Miz saved his career. Miz made him.

Damien Mizdow comes out as Miz mocks him. Miz says he’s on a steep decline. He needs to do the right thing, get his career, life and future on track. These people can’t do that for him. Miz can, though, and he’s willing to forgive everything that has happened, because he’s a charitable person. He will forgive Mizdow if he just says “I’m sorry”, and everything will go back to the way it was. Mizdow looks around to everyone cheering him. Miz rambles on some more. He says he can make Mizdow a star if he just shakes his hand and apologizes. Does Mizdow want his career in the hands of the fans, or Miz? The fans will forget about him, unless he stays with Miz. Mizdow takes off his sunglasses as Miz demands a handshake and an apology. Mizdow shakes Miz’s hand, then says he’s sorry…he didn’t do this sooner. Mizdow attacks Miz with punches, sending him to the floor. He then starts tossing chairs as Miz heads up the ramp. He looks at Rae and proceeds to make out with her before celebrating with some fans at ringside.

MATCH 5: BAD NEWS BARRETT, THE BIG SHOW AND SHEAMUS VS. ROMAN REIGNS, DOLPH ZIGGLER AND INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION DANIEL BRYAN
Ziggler starts with Sheamus, and Sheamus shoves Ziggler back to the corner before giving a clean break. Perhaps in response to Sheamus, I notice Ziggler has a ridiculous hairstyle tonight. Anyway, Sheamus backs him into the opposite corner off another lock-up, then slaps Ziggler. Ziggler retaliates, which leads to both throwing punches. Ziggler hits a few shoulders against the ropes until Sheamus comes back with a kneelift. Show tags in and hits a body blow before picking Ziggler up by the face. He throws Ziggler to the corner, where he hits a big chop. Ziggler gets whipped into the buckles, and Show follows up with a running hip attack. Show goes for the spear, but Ziggler dropkicks him in the knee before hitting a leaping DDT for 2. Ziggler charges at him in the corner, only to get swatted out of the air with a chop. BNB tags in and hits a swinging neckbreaker for 2. Ziggler escapes a chinlock, kicks BNB off the ropes, then runs into the Winds of Change for 2. Sheamus tags in, and he stomps on Ziggler’s hand. Sheamus picks Ziggler up, only to put him back down with a European uppercut. He stands on Ziggler’s face against the ropes, then slaps him around in the corner. Ziggler comes back with a flurry of rights, escapes a tilt-a-whirl, shoves Sheamus away and tags in Bryan. Bryan ducks a clothesline and dropkicks BNB off the apron. He hits Sheamus with rights, backflips off a corner whip, ducks a clothesline and hits one of his own. He fires up the Yes! Kicks, misses the Buzzsaw, then backdrops Sheamus to the floor. Bryan nails him with a suicide dive, then rolls him back into the ring. As the ref’s back is turned, BNB levels Bryan with a big boot. Commercials.

Back from the break, Show is now legal for his team, and he has Bryan in a bearhug. Bryan tries to fight out, so Show hits him with a bodyslam. Show then hits a big elbow off the ropes for 2. BNB tags in and throws Bryan into the corner before setting him across the top buckle for some forearms to the back, followed by a running kick to the gut. BNB pulls Bryan down for 2, then applies a rear chinlock. Bryan tries to escape with some elbows, only to have BNB nail him in the back of the head. BNB whips him across the ring before missing a big boot in the corner. He tags in Show, who prevents Bryan from tagging out by standing on his back. He then knocks Ziggler off the apron and into the barricade before signaling for the chokeslam. Bryan escapes and pulls Show down into the Yes! Lock, only to have Show toss him to the floor moments later. Sheamus tags in, and he hits Bryan with a European uppercut before rolling Bryan back in. He hits another one, then sets Bryan up on the top buckle. He hits a pair of kneelifts, then goes up for a superplex. Bryan fights him off, putting him down with a series of punches. He goes for a cross-body, but Sheamus catches him and tosses him onto his shoulders. Bryan spins out and hits a tornado DDT. Reigns and BNB tag in, and Reigns unloads on BNB in the corner with a series of short clotheslines. He nails an uppercut, then mounts BNB for some punches before blasting Show on the apron with a Superman Punch. BNB receives one as well, but only gets 2 as Sheamus breaks it up. Ziggler runs in, and Sheamus tries to catch him with White Noise. Ziggler escapes and nails a superkick, sending Sheamus into the ropes before clotheslining him to the floor. Outside, Bryan nails Show with a running knee off the apron. Back in the ring, BNB hits a mule kick on Reigns, then signals for the Bull Hammer, only to have Reigns surprise him with a spear for 3.

WINNERS: DANIEL BRYAN, ROMAN REIGNS AND DOLPH ZIGGLER.

End of show.

WWE: Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe

The Randy Savage Story DVD

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WWE SmackDown Results and April 2 Recap

April 04, 2015 By: Category: Videos, WWE | Pro Wrestling

The show this week emanates from Fresno, CA, and we’re kicking off the show with the NEW WWE World Champion, Seth Rollins, who is accompanied by J&J Security, Kane and the Big Show. We see the Andre battle royal placed at ringside, which Show stands next to for no real reason. Rollins says it feels so good when a plan works out perfectly. This past Sunday at Wrestlemania, he cashed in his MITB contract, inserted himself into the main event, beat Brock Lesnar, beat Roman Reigns, and became the new champion. Just like that, he solidified himself as the new face of WWE. Being the champion isn’t all about being the very best in the ring, because right after he shocked the world and took the title, he flew on a private jet to New York for an appearance on the Today Show. After he showed them what’s what, he flew all the way back to California, just in time to walk into RAW and hear Lesnar demanding his rematch. He knows the fans can’t understand this, but flying coast-to-coast twice in a day makes you pretty jet-lagged. He’s new to being champion, but the WWE Universe deserves Rollins at his best. And although Lesnar does deserve a rematch, Monday night just wasn’t his night. For every action, there’s a reaction. If Lesnar hadn’t lost his mind, there might have been a title rematch tonight on Smackdown. The feed goes black for about 30 seconds, then freezes for another 30 or so. When it comes back, Randy Orton is out on the stage. He says he remembers everything that has happened between them. Several months ago, Rollins curb-stomped him through a desk and stepped. He remembers playing them all like fiddles until he got his sweet revenge. He also remembers nearly ripping Rollins’ head off with an RKO at WM right before he cashed in his contract. Most importantly, he swears he’ll go to the papers, if he has to. Also, he’s still owed a rematch from last year. So, with Lesnar suspended indefinitely, that should put Orton at the top of the list to face him for the title. Rollins says not to dwell in the past when the present and future of WWE is standing in the ring. He doesn’t know who Orton thinks he is, but in Rollins’ universe and WWE, he and he alone decides when and where the next title shot happens. Orton says Rollins has never done anything by himself. He gets why J&J leech onto who is in power, because they’re spineless sewer rats. But Show and Kane? They were monsters, but now they’re just lapdogs for the Authority. At least Show won at WM when he won the Andre battle royal. Kane? What did he do at WM? Orton doesn’t recall seeing him there. What does the Director of Operations really do anyway? As far as Orton can tell, he went from the “Big Red Monster” to Little Red Riding Hood. Kane says that, as DOO, he has plenty of power. That’s why tonight, Orton will face Show. And, if he can defeat Show, maybe the Authority will reconsider his title opportunity. By the way, that match starts right now.

MATCH 1: THE BIG SHOW VS. RANDY ORTON (W/KANE, J&J SECURITY AND SETH ROLLINS)
Show backs Orton into the corner, but Orton punches his way out before running into a shoulder. Show throws him to a corner for a body blow and a running hip attack. Orton avoids the spear, however, and puts Show down with a dropkick. Why is Orton wearing elbow pads? It looks odd. Show rolls to the apron, and as he tries to come back in, Orton boots him in the side of the head twice before hitting a suspended DDT across the top rope. Orton coils up for the RKO, but before it hits, the rest of the Authority hit the ring and beat Orton down, leading to the DQ.

WINNER VIA DISQUALIFICATION: RANDY ORTON.

Rollins enters the ring as the beatdown continues and tells everyone to part. He looks to be setting up the curb stomp, but Orton tackles him with a Thesz press. Kane puts Orton down with a chokeslam, which leads Ryback to run down to the ring. He takes out Kane and J&J before Orton hits Mercury with an RKO. Noble receives Shell Shocked, and Kane goes down after another RKO.

Originally, Daniel Bryan and Dolph Ziggler were scheduled to face Sheamus and Bad News Barrett. However, Ziggler is playing up a storyline injury after the attack by Sheamus, so the match will now be Bryan vs. Sheamus one-on-one.

It was cool to see my girl Ronda Rousey at WM, by the way.

The Bella Tw*ts are on commentary yet again. Who the hell did I piss off to repeatedly have to listen to these two?

MATCH 2: NATALYA VS. NAOMI
We get an inset promo from Naomi. My computer is on mute, so I have no idea what she’s saying. Probably something about winning the Divas title. Naomi locks up with Nattie, who turns the hold into an arm wringer. Naomi counters, and Nattie counters that. Naomi breaks the hold, goes into a crisscross, and the two attempt simultaneous dropkicks before kipping up at the same time. Nattie backs Naomi into the corner, ducks a kick to the head, then goes for a slingshot back suplex, only to drop Naomi on her ass. She hits a low dropkick for 2, then pounds Naomi in the head repeatedly before applying a modified abdominal stretch. Naomi breaks it with some elbows to the knee, then reverses into her own attempt. Nattie breaks it with a snapmare, then goes for a corner whip. Naomi tries to catch her with a headscissors, but gets dumped to the apron. She lands on her feet, hits a high kick to the head and a springboard sunset flip. Nattie rolls through and looks for the Sharpshooter. Naomi counters with a roll-up for 2, then grabs Nattie in a low headscissors and drives the top of her head into the mat, which which is apparently enough for 3.

WINNER: NAOMI.

Shock of shocks, Nikki Bella holds the belt over her head at ringside while making stupid faces.

Later tonight, we’ll hear from both John Cena and Roman Reigns.

We see Kane in his office. Seth Rollins enters and apologizes for the RKO, but loves that he led Orton to believe he gets a title match. Kane says he is considering a title match. He has the authority to make executive decisions. Extreme Rules is less than four weeks away, and a title match between Rollins and Orton sounds good to him. Is Rollins concerned Orton will beat him? Rollins says Kane is buying into the hype, but the fact is he’s smarter than Orton. Kane responds that Rollins is better than Orton. Rollins says this stinks, and it turns out he’s actually talking about the office. We hear a toilet flush, and that’s when Dean Ambrose enters the frame. He compliments Kane on his office. Kane says that, since Ambrose rudely used his bathroom, he’ll face the man who threw him through a ladder at WM, Luke Harper. Ambrose likes the idea and thanks Kane.

Byron Saxton sat down with Roman Reigns for an interview earlier this week. Saxton asks what it was like to finally face Brock Lesnar. Reigns says it was an honor just to be a part of the main event. His plan was to come out swinging, and he did, only to have Lesnar throw him around. He showed a lot of people he could take a beating. He stepped in the ring, got knocked and picked himself up everything. He got right back in the fight. Saxton asks about strategy going in. Reigns says Lesnar gave him a ride to every borough in Suplex City, with Lesnar hitting every kind of suplex he could think of. Lesnar did it, but he doesn’t think Lesnar was ready when Reigns hit him in the mouth. He rode the wave and survived. He likes Suplex City. Lesnar wasn’t ready for him, because when he hit Lesnar in the mouth, Lesnar didn’t have an answer. He hit and hit, and finally knocked Lesnar down. When it comes down to it, he changed Lesnar’s face with his fist, permanently. Saxton points out that Reigns smiled and laughed during the match. What was the message he was trying to send? Reigns says you don’t see fights like this often. It changed their lives. Lesnar smacked the piss out of him and tried to keep him down for good. When you get to that point, you’re doing more than sending a message. Reigns kept getting back up, spit up blood and smiled in Lesnar’s face. Lesnar could not legitimately knock out Reigns. Saxton moves onto Rollins winning the title, right after Reigns thought he had the match won. Reigns calls it terrible. He was right there. He climbed the mountain. He felt the top. He was looking down, and he got pulled right off of it in a matter of moments. That was Rollins’ job, and that’s what he did. He had the MITB case he could cash in any time. What a perfect time. Let the animals take each other out and he could pick the bones. That’s what Rollins did. Reigns could have beaten Lesnar in about 30 more seconds. When it comes to Rollins, Reigns has beaten him before. He can, he has, and he will beat him again.

MATCH 3: THE MIZ VS. R-TRUTH
The two lock up, and Miz applies an arm wringer. Truth counters, so Miz punches him and applies a headlock. Miz hits a shoulder off the ropes, goes into a crisscross and receives a hiptoss. Truth ducks a clothesline and hits a jumping heel kick. Truth hits a corner splash, a kick and goes for the axe kick. Miz avoids it and goes for a roll-up. Truth hangs onto the top rope to block. Miz rolls to the apron, boots Truth through the ropes and then hits the Skull-Crushing Finale for 3.

WINNER: THE MIZ.

Damien Mizdow comes down and lays Miz out with a Skull-Crushing Finale of his own, then steals Miz’s sunglasse before standing over Miz.

John Cena, the NEW United States Champion, makes his way down. He has a document in his hand. After pandering to the crowd, he says that the paper (which is apparently the title contract he and Rusev signed) was his Declaration of Independence, WM would be his revolution, and now the US title will get the respect it deserves. He is taking nothing away from Rusev as an athlete. Rusev took him to the limit after spending a year undefeated, but him being the US Champion made him sick. Not because he’s Russian, and not because he can’t fight; because every time he opened his mouth, Rusev proved himself to be the world’s biggest jackass. Here’s the sad thing, Rusev IS the American Dream. He came to America, was given opportunity and had success. Was he thankful? No. Instead, he just told everyone how much America sucks. Newsflash, America doesn’t suck. Cena is proud of the US, and he’s proud of the US title. America is the land of opportunity, and this title is not just a beacon of excellence. From now on, it represents opportunity. He recites what’s written on the Statue of Liberty. He stands here now, saying bring him your outcasts, your underdogs, your future stars, your have-nots, anyone the Authority says is a B+ player, the ones the fans want to see that the Authority doesn’t want them to…Hell, bring him anyone from Lesnar to the Bushwhackers. He’ll fight them all. He’ll give them opportunity to become the champion, and here’s how. On RAW, he issued the first open challenge for any superstar in the back to come to the ring and earn the title. Right now, he’s going to continue the challenge each week, because the US was built on a fighting spirit…

Rusev and Lana interrupt. Lana says what happened at WM was a travesty, not an opportunity. Cena is not worthy of being champion, and he’s half the man Rusev is. Cena’s revolution is a mere fantasy. This is Rusev’s world, and everyone should be grateful they live in the era of Rusev. Rusev says he did not lose at WM, while staring a hole through Lana. He’s still America’s champion. He is the super athlete. He is a Russian tank. Cena is not a hero; he is a coward, just like all of the fans. He then speaks in Russian before saying this is his domain. This is his country. This is his world. In his world, little people like Cena get opportunities, too, like the opportunity to surrender what belongs to Rusev back to him, or get crushed at Extreme Rules. Cena calls Rusev dumb, blind and drunk. Rusev lost at WM and got his butt whipped. Cena is standing in the ring, and the only things standing between the two of them are fear and common sense. Rusev starts marching down to the ring and Cena says if he wants to get it on in Fresno, the champ is here. Rusev just starts waving the Russian flag back and forth, then orders the large flag to be dropped. It doesn’t come down, so he screams for it to drop again. Nothing happens, so Cena says Rusev means we’ll see [a giant US flag dropping from the ceiling]. Cena starts listing off stereotypical American things, then says he pledges allegiance to kick Rusev’s ass at Extreme Rules, which doesn’t even make sense.

So…Rusev/Cena will headline a third PPV in a row. Hooray.

We get a promo for Adrian Neville, who is apparently going to go by just Neville at this point. I’m glad they’re still calling him “The Man That Gravity Forgot”.

MATCH 4: LUKE HARPER VS. DEAN AMBROSE
The two immediately trade punches before Ambrose throws Harper tot he corner. He grinds his forearm into Harper’s face, then goes for a whip. Harper reverses and runs into a back elbow. Ambrose hits a spinning back elbow from the middle rope, puts Harper down with a snapmare, hits a low clothesline and then gets 2 off a power-drive elbow. Harper comes back with a throat thrust, then hits a pair of uppercuts in the corner. He rakes Ambrose across the face, then nails a European uppercut. Ambrose comes back with punches and a kick off the ropes. He hits several strikes, ducks a back elbow, ducks a clothesline and goes for a cross-body. Harper catches him and tosses him to the floor. Commercials.

Back from the break, Harper slaps Ambrose across the face and tosses him to the corner. Ambrose avoids a big boot, and Harper goes over the top rope before crashing to the floor. Harper catches a suicide dive and rolls Ambrose into the ring. Ambrose spins through, returns to the floor and drops Harper with a clothesline. He rolls Harper back into the ring, then comes off the top with a flying elbow for 2. Ambrose hits a few punches, but Harper retaliates with a big boot. He signals for the sit-out powerbomb, but Ambrose escapes and low-bridges Harper to the floor. Ambrose goes after him, but gets thrown into the timekeeper’s area. He starts tearing apart the announce desk, only to turn around into a flying forearm from the barricade by Ambrose. Ambrosse then goes for a powerbomb through the announce desk, but Harper shoves him spine-first into the ring post. Harper then powerbombs Ambrose through the announce desk.

WINNER: NO CONTEST.

The referee is calling for help as Harper walks over Ambrose’s body. The other referees manages to get Harper away from the area, then turn their attention to Ambrose.

During the break, EMTs and referees walked Ambrose to the back.

We see the Prime-Time Players in a studio. Titus O’Neil says they’re here to talk to everyone about something that is played out, that being the New Day. First off, Big E. Titus sprays himself with a water bottle as we cut to a still of E wiping his forehead. Titus mocks E’s dorky promos as Darren Young tries to calm him down. Titus doesn’t know what denomination E is going for, but he sounds like he has a possum stuck in his throat. Young says E has no rhythm. They both call Kofi Kingston a natural athlete, but then make fun of the fact that he has a Scott Steiner chest (okay, they called it sunken). Finally, there’s Xavier Woods, a personal hair disaster. Young used to have an afro, but Woods’ hair is nappy. If your hair is nappy, ain’t nobody happy. Now they’re trying to do the New Day chant as crickets start chirping. Titus then does his barking bit before breaking out the “millions of dollars” chant.

I love that even WWE admits the New Day gimmick sucks, and is having everyone say it sucks in some bizarre attempt to get it over.

Sheamus comes out for his match, and he has a fancy new entrance theme to go with the new look and attitude. It sounds pretty cool, actually. A “You look stupid” chant breaks out, and Sheamus just goes with it. If you’re wondering why he attacked Daniel Bryan and Dolph Ziggler on Monday, the answer is simple: because he can. While he was out with an injury, he sat at home and watched RAW & Smackdown every week, and all he kept wondering was where have all the real men gone? All your Bryans and Zigglers…they’re great little fellas! Hard workers! Go-getters! But they make Kevin Hart look like Shaquille O’Neal. They’re two vertically-challenged runts, and yet you’re disappointed when they fail you. They can’t even hang in the main event. Shame on you. As for Sheamus, he’s not here to disappoint you or put a smile on your face; he’s simply here to crush your hopes and dreams. A real man has come back to WWE, and he promises everyone he won’t rest until he puts all of the underdogs out of their misery. Fella.

We get a commercial for four new WWE Network shows. The first is a TV-MA cartoon by Seth Green. Then, there’s some crap by one of the people responsible for Jackass. Third is a new show hosted by Jerry Springer. Finally, they’re bringing back the Divas Search. Sweet f*cking Chr*st. Seeing this garbage, I’m now starting to be really thankful that the WWE Network is completely broken in my household and that I’ve sworn to never pay for another month again.

MATCH 5: SHEAMUS VS. INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION DANIEL BRYAN (NON-TITLE)
Bad News Barrett is on commentary. Sheamus pie-faces Bryan into the corner, but Bryan reverses and starts laying in some kicks. Sheamus comes back with strikes of his own, then goes to throw Bryan across the ring. Bryan puts on the brakes and lays in some kicks in the corner. Sheamus whips him across the ring, then hits him with a running clothesline. Sheamus nails a European uppercut, then another. Then another. Then another. Sheamus slaps him in the gut, then hits a kneelift. He steps on Bryan’s face, then pie-faces him some more while calling him “Danny Boy”. Bryan comes up with some more kicks, then hits a dragon screw before going into a leglock, which he breaks to then hit a series of palm thrusts to the side of Sheamus’ head. Sheamus heads to the floor for a breather, then comes back in for a lock-up. He backs Bryan into the corner, nails a shot, then goes for an Irish whip. Bryan ducks a clothesline, slides through Sheamus’ legs, then hits some kicks to the chest before Sheamus catches him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, sending Bryan to the floor. Commercials.

Back from the break, Sheamus has Bryan in a rear chinlock. Bryan elbows his way out, only to get cut down with a kneelift. Sheamus hits a release vertical suplex, then drops a big knee off the ropes. He screams, “Are you not entertained?”, which makes me happy. Sheamus then hits the release vertical suplex again. Bryan barely pulls himself to his feet, and Sheamus nails him with a straight right. Sheamus hits another European uppercut, then stands on Bryan’s head against the middle buckle. Sheamus heads to the apron to taunt the crowd, then comes back in to slap Bryan around and talk some trash. Bryan begins slapping Sheamus across the face until Sheamus retaliates with one of his own. Bryan backflips off a corner whip, ducks a clothesline and hits one of his own. Sheamus gets up and charges at Bryan, so Bryan low-bridges him to the floor. Bryan knocks him into the barricade with a suicide dive, then rolls him back in. Up top, Bryan hits a seated missile dropkick, then kips up. He fires up the Yes! Kicks, but Sheamus blocks the Buzzsaw and looks for White Noise. Bryan breaks free by kneeing Sheamus in the head and looks for the Yes! Lock. Sheamus won’t go down, and he shoves Bryan into the corner. He charges in, only to have Bryan hit a drop-toehold into the middle buckle. Bryan then kicks the buckle into Sheamus’ face and heads back up top. Sheamus crotches him, then hits him with another series of European uppercuts. He pulls Bryan off the buckles with a cravat, which he then turns into a spinning neckbreaker. Bryan rolls to the apron, and Sheamus pulls him up for the 10 Beats of the Bodhran. Bryan blocks it after three or four shots, hits a forearm and a series of headbutts. Sheamus shakes it off before knocking Bryan to the floor with a forearm. Bryan gets back up, and he’s busted wide open. The referee prevents Sheamus from going after him, and the distraction allows BNB to get up and blast Bryan with the Bullhammer. Alliteration is fun. Sheamus drops to the floor as a trainer has come out to check on Bryan. The match is still going, as the referee is counting down. Sheamus decides to take the cheap win by climbing back in at around 7, and Bryan is counted out.

WINNER VIA COUNT-OUT: SHEAMUS.

End of show.

Sheamus looked good in his return, and has added several new moves to his repertoire. The mohawk has to go, however. Why he couldn’t just shave his head? I don’t know.

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WWE SmackDown Results and March 26 Recap

March 28, 2015 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week, SmackDown emanates from the Staples Center in Los Angeles, CA. This is the “go-home” show before Wrestlemania XXXI, so don’t expect much.

MATCH 1-FATAL 4-WAY MATCH: JIMMY USO (W/NAOMI AND JEY USO) VS. BIG E (W/XAVIER WOODS) VS. FERNANDO (W/DIEGO AND EL TORITO) VS. WWE TAG TEAM CO-CHAMPION CESARO (W/TYSON KIDD AND NATALYA)
This is a preview of the fatal 4-way for the tag titles that will take place on the WM kickoff show. The four start off attacking each other in opposite corners until E and Jimmy are left standing. They duck shots from each other, and collide with Cesaro & Fernando in opposite corners. Looks like tag rules are not in effect here. Jimmy chops Cesaro as Fernando is hit with an overhead belly-to-belly from E. He does the same to Jimmy, then throws Cesaro into the other two, hitting the trio with a corner attack. He gorilla presses Cesaro into Jimmy, then hits Fernando with a belly-to-belly. He hits the Warrior Splash on Fernando for 2 as Cesaro breaks it up. E sends him to the floor, then turns around into a reverse dragon whip from Jimmy. Jimmy goes for a suicide dive, but Fernando intercepts him with a dropkick before hitting a suicide dive on E and Cesaro outside. Jimmy then takes his turn, wiping out all three. He rolls Cesaro in, then goes up top for the Samoan Splash. E stops him, and Cesaro knocks him to the floor with a European uppercut. Cesaro dropkicks E off the apron, then nails Fernando on the apron with punches before going for the lifting superplex. Jimmy climbs up to the middle rope as well, while E comes in from behind with a German suplex, taking all three down in a variation of the “Tower of Doom” spot. He covers Fernando, but only gets 2. Fernando comes back with a complete shot/DDT combo on Jimmy and E for 2 as Cesaro breaks it up. Cesaro boots Fernando, then runs into a pair of boots in the corner. He catches Fernando off a dive and hits the Cesaro Swing before catapulting Fernando into Jimmy. He then does the same thing to E before going for the Neutralizer. Fernando breaks it up with a Backstabber, and E looks for the Big Ending on Cesaro. He hits it, but only after Jimmy nails him in the face with a superkick, putting both men down in the process. Fernando tosses Jimmy to the apron, but Jimmy backdrops him to the floor. He heads up top and hits Cesaro with the Samoan Splash for 3.

WINNER: JIMMY USO.

In the main event, John Cena, Roman Reigns, Daniel Bryan and Mark Henry will take on Bray Wyatt, Seth Rollins, the Big Show and Kane in an 8-man tag team match.

What comes next, like ever year, is craploads of filler, emanating from Wrestlemania Axxess.

Back to the arena, AJ Lee is in the ring. The fans have known her for a long time. They’ve seen her as a diva, a GM, everyone’s girlfriend, and the longest-reigning Divas Champion in history. She loves that belt, and so does Paige. On RAW, the Bellas used that love to turn them on each other. It worked, but because of that, at Wrestlemania, she’s going to step up to the plastic mannequins, and she is going to beat them. The only question she has is whether she’s doing it alone. Paige, whether you want to join her at WM is entirely up to you.

Paige comes out and says she loves how Lee wants to skip past RAW, but she’s not fooling anyone. It’s been a year since the day after last WM when Paige beat Lee for the title, and she knows Lee doesn’t want Paige to have it back. Lee says it’s not about that. She wants the belt, and when she wants something, she gets it. But now is the time for WM, and as long as they are threatening each other, they are no threat to the Bellas. Paige agrees, but how does she know if this isn’t another one of Lee’s tricks? Lee says it’s because she hates losing. Paige is the same way. She’s weird, crazy and stubborn as hell, and she also hates losing. That is why they can’t let the Kardashians win at WM. Paige agrees, says to ditch the “frenemies” thing and become actual tag team partners.

The Bella Tw*ts come out, and my ears are already bleeding. Nikki calls them names and says Lee is a manipulator, but that won’t help them win. Brie says they have a bond that can’t be broken. She’ll always forgive her sister, because they’re sisters. Nikki says these two desperately want the title, and we all know if Lee gets it, she’ll never defend it. Brock Lesnar showed up for work more times last year. Nikki says she has been running the division since Lee has been on vacation. These two remind her of every other diva in the locker room, trying to be them. Brie says everyone wants to be a Bella, and I throw up in my mouth. Lee says that they’re right: everyone wants to be failed, D-list actors like these two. I’ve mentioned I love AJ Lee right? Okay, good. Nikki responds with the most brilliant retort ever: “Not a failed actress, no.” Stunning. Absolutely stunning. Paige says they don’t want to be the Bellas because they prefer to be freaks, geeks, widows, misfits and oddballs. Most of all, they prefer being the ones that can be themselves. Lee says they are what real women look like, and at WM, they are going to kick the Bellas asses. Nikki says she prefers no labels, but a real woman prefers to let her actions do the talking, so why don’t you garblegarblegarble? Brie pretends to hold her back, then makes some stupid comment about how being held back makes them real women and calls Paige/Lee bitches.

Holy lord, the Bellas are worthless. Every time I think they’ve gotten as worthless as they possibly could, they outdo themselves.

More filler.

MATCH 2: JOHN CENA, MARK HENRY, DANIEL BRYAN AND ROMAN REIGNS VS. SETH ROLLINS (W/J&J SECURITY), THE BIG SHOW, KANE AND BRAY WYATT
Reigns is getting Cena-levels of boos. Reigns starts with Rollins, with Rollins ducking a lock-up attempt. He then applies a side headlock before Reigns breaks free and hits a shoulderblock. Rollins throws Reigns to the corner and stomps him down, only to have Reigns hit him with a running clothesline. He follows up with a series of short corner clotheslines, misses a short-arm, then hits a tilt-a-whirl powerslam. Rollins counters an arm wringer with a jawbreaker, then tags in Wyatt, who knocks Reigns down with an uppercut. Reigns comes back with a back elbow, then throws Wyatt to the corner for some kicks. Wyatt gets whipped across the ring, where he backdrops Reigns to the apron. Reigns lands on his feet and hits a hotshot before nailing Wyatt with the apron dropkick. Wyatt tags out to Kane, who shoulders Reigns off the ropes. He nails an uppercut, misses a clothesline and gets hit with one by Reigns. Reigns hits a couple uppercuts, hits a boot out of the corner, then lands a flying clothesline from the middle for 2. Kane tags out to Show, and now Henry is begging for a tag. Reigns obliges. The two big men trade punches before Show hits a shoulder off the ropes, then nails a big body blow before throwing Henry to the corner for a hip attack. Wyatt back in, and he drops a couple elbows before peppering Henry with rights. Rollins in, and he stomps Henry down. He screams in Henry’s face, leading Henry to shove him away. Kane tags in before Henry can tag out and stomps Henry some more. In the corner, Kane hits a straight right, then tags out to Show. Show hits a big chop, but Henry starts fighting back with punches. Off the ropes, Show connects with a big side kick, then walks over Henry before draping him on the bottom rope. Show stands on Henry’s back as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, Cena and Wyatt are now legal, with Cena hitting a Proto-Plex. He connects with the Five-Knuckle Shuffle, then looks for the AA. Kane tries to interfere, but gets knocked to the floor. Cena turns his attention back to Wyatt, who runs through Cena with a flying back elbow. Show tags in, and he drops Cena with a bodyslam. Kane in, and he hits an uppercut before stomping Cena down. On a side note, watching the new Road is Jericho DVD (review coming soon) and watching him work with Kane back in 2000 or so, you realize what a lazy slob Kane has turned into in the years since. Back to the match, Kane locks in a front chancery, and Cena is trying to power his way to his corner for a tag. Kane muscles him across the ring back to his own corner, where Rollins tags in. Rollins stomps Cena down, then distracts the ref as Wyatt nails a cheap shot. Cena fights back as Rollins talks trash, and now the two are trading punches. Cena ducks a clothesline and goes for the AA. Rollins lands on his feet, kicks Cena and hits him with an Asai DDT for 2. In the corner again, Wyatt tags in and beats Cena down. He hits the running senton for 2, then goes for it again. Cena moves on the second attempt, and is now crawling for the tag. Rollins tags in and cuts Cena off with a sleeper. Cena fights back to his feet, so Rollins jumps on his back with a bodyscissors. Cena rams him back-first into the buckles to break it up, then collapses. He looks for a tag, but Rollins stops him with a botched blockbuster for 2. Rollins tags out to Show, who then boots Henry off the apron. Show goes to the middle rope for a Vader Bomb, but Cena dodges it by rolling to the apron. Cena rolls himself back in and begins to crawl, only to have Rollins tag in and cut him off yet again. He charges at Cena, but gets backdropped to the floor. Cena dives for the tag and gets Bryan, who ducks a Rollins clothesline and knocks the rest of the heels of the apron. Rollins sends him into the corner, Bryan backflips off, ducks a clothesline and hits one of his own. He connects with a corner dropkick, then sets Rollins up for a super hurricanrana. Bryan fires up the Yes! Kicks and goes for the Buzzsaw, but stops when J&J jump on the apron. Bryan dispatches of them quickly, only to turn around into a Ghetto Blaster by Rollins. Show looks for a tag as Reigns does the same. Show tags in first and knocks Reigns off the apron as Henry gets back up. He goes for the chokeslam on Bryan, only to have Reigns enter the ring and nail him with a Superman Punch. Wyatt comes in and goes for Sister Abigail, but Reigns shoves him off and hits the spear. Kane comes for a chokeslam, so Reigns escapes and hits another spear. He connects with a corner clothesline on Show, and Henry comes in to hit Show with an avalanche. Cena in with the AA, and Bryan caps it off with the running knee for 3.

WINNERS: DANIEL BRYAN, JOHN CENA, MARK HENRY AND ROMAN REIGNS

End of show.

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