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TNA Wrestling Hardcore Justice 2013 Results & Recap: Bully Ray Regains The Title

August 16, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week’s TNA Wrestling Impact is a “special” episode, that being a non-PPV episode named after Hardcore Justice. The show starts with AI stopping Jeff Hardy in the back and asks about tonight’s BFG Series ladder match. He’s interrupted by Austin Aries, who is sick of these ladder matches. Aries needs the points, and challenges Hardy to the match right away.

We get a video package for moments from previous Hardcore Justice installments, with a viewer discretion warning. What does that mean? That means the show has been bloody in the past, and will either be a) needlessly bloody once more, or b) be a standard show that is way overhyped.

MATCH 1-BFG Series 4-Way Ladder Match: Austin Aries vs. Kazarian vs. AJ Styles vs. Jeff Hardy
We are informed that this match is worth 20 points, because TNA. I spot a fan dressed like Joseph Park in the front row. L. Ron Hubbard, help us. Kaz immediately goes for a ladder on the ramp and tries to get back in the ring, but is blocked. As he puts it down, Aries assaults him on the ramp. In the ring, Hardy and AJ trade punches. Aries and Kaz have a tug-of-war with the ladder, resulting in Kaz falling off the stage. Aries follows up with a double axe handle from the top. Hardy dropkicks him through the ropes, and AJ knocks Hardy to the floor before hitting a slingshot cross-body to the outside. Kaz rams AJ with a ladder from the stage and throws it in the ring, but Hardy stops him from climbing. Kaz climbs off an Irish whip, but Aries blocks it and crotches Kaz on one of the rungs before knocking the ladder down. Hardy throws Aries to the corner, but Aries reverses and beats Hardy down with rights. Hardy blocks a corner whip and counters with a spinning headscissors that sends Aries to the floor. Hardy sets the ladder up, but AJ comes in and knocks it to the side. He attacks Hardy, but Hardy escapes a suplex. He goes for the Twist, but AJ escapes and skee-balls Hardy under the bottom rope and into the announce desk. Kaz shoulders him from the apron and hits a slingshot DDT. Aries forearms Kaz, and now they trade punches until Aries hotshots him. AJ knocks the ladder into Kaz’s head, and now Aries is in the ring, trying to set it up. He backdrops AJ to the outside and sets up the ladder. He starts to climb, but Hardy stops him with some punches. Aries hits all three men with forearms, then stomps Hardy down in the corner before hitting a jumping knee to the gut. Outside, Kaz shoves AJ head-first into the ring post before getting knocked down off the apron by Aries. Aries kicks Hardy and climbs the ladder once more, but Hardy once again stops him before throwing him to the corner. Aries escapes a suplex and clubs Hardy in the back before attacking both Kaz and AJ on the floor. He climbs once again, and Hardy climbs as well. They fight at the top and topple the ladder, crashing into Kaz and AJ on the apron. Commercials.

Back from the break, and Mike Tenay gets his first stupid line of the night out by calling this a “free pay-per-view event”. Aries knocks Hardy down in the ring and begins climbing. Kaz pulls him down and throws him face-first into the ladder. Aries recovers and knocks Kaz to the floor before dropkicking a ladder into him. AJ attacks Aries as he begins to climb, then goes to the apron, where he hits the Superman on Aries, sending Aries to the ramp on the outside. AJ grabs the ladder that is set up in the ring, readjusts it and begins to climb. Aries grabs his foot as Kaz brings in another ladder. He attacks all three with it, then sets it up, as the first ladder is banged up. He sets it up next to the original ladder and climbs up. Aries stops him and climbs the bad ladder. Hardy climbs, as does AJ, and now all four men are on the ladders. They fight at the top until Aries hits a sunset flip powerbomb on Hardy. Kaz and AJ continue to fight, and Kaz rams AJ’s head into the ladder before going for a superplex. AJ blocks it and drops to mat, knocking the ladder down in the process. He lays Kaz out with a discus clothesline, then goes back to the ladder and sets it up in the corner. Aries gets to his feet in the opposite corner, and he hits a running dropkick on AJ against the ladder. Aries climbs the other ladder and gets to the top when Hardy cuts him off. Aries knocks Hardy down, then gets caught by AJ. AJ pulls him down and goes for the Styles Clash, but Kaz knocks AJ down, taking both men out at the same time in the process. He now climbs the ladder, and Hardy climbs as well. They fight at the top, and Aries sends them both down with a missile dropkick into the ladder. Aries climbs once more as Bobby Roode and Christopher Daniels comes out onto the ramp. Aries is distracted, and that’s when AJ springboards onto the ladder and begins fighting with Aries. Hardy shoves the ladder down, sending them both into the ladder in the corner. Kaz whips Hardy, but Hardy counters and sends Kaz into the ladder. He hits Kaz with the Twist of Fate, then goes for the busted ladder. He sets it up in the center, and that’s when Roode comes in. He pulls Hardy down, and Hardy knocks him out with a reverse enziguri as Daniels is distracting the ref. Kaz climbs the ladder at the same time as Hardy and throws an appletini in Hardy’s face that he got from Daniels. Hardy is temporarily blinded and falls off the ladder, allowing Kaz to grab the clipboard.

WINNER: Kazarian, who picks up 20 points, bringing his total to 22.

We see the Main Event Mafia enter the building, sans Kurt Angle.

AI stops Chris Sabin in the back, asking about tonight’s cage match. Sabin says one of his favorite memories as a kid was watching Team 3-D put a man through a flaming table covered in thumbtacks. He knows not to take Bully Ray lightly, but Ray better not take him lightly. No one believed he could beat Ray, but he did twice in a row, and he makes it three times tonight.

In the ring, Dixie Carter is standing by with the MEM. She says that Kurt Angle entered rehab two weeks ago. He’s still there, and she doesn’t know when he’ll be back. He has everyone in the company’s support, including these men. She asks everyone to join her in her support, then tells him to come back soon. Aces and Eights make their way out, led by Mr. Anderson. The “loser leaves TNA” 5-on-5 match has been postponed to next week, BTW. Anderson tells them they only have one week to come up with a replacement for Angle. He and his buddies are so excited to be able to say they ended the career of Quenton Jackson before it even started. They ended the career of Samoa Joe. Or will Sting never be able to wrestle again? Or remember that Magnus guy? Hell of a body and future. He was gonna be the future of TNA. Magnus tells Anderson the only future he should be concerned with is his immediate future, which involved Magnus punching him in the mouth. He doesn’t have the best hearing, but he believes these people were telling Anderson he sucks. There may be five A and E guys and they have a week to find a MEM replacement, but he’s pretty sure Norfolk, VA is Mafia country, so if they can’t find someone in the back, perhaps they can recruit someone from the audience. So, one way or the other, A and E can be sure that one of them is going home with a pink slip. Anderson says tonight starts a new chapter for A and E. Bully Ray recaptures the World title, and next week, a member of MEM is eliminated. A brawl then breaks out between the two sides, with A and E dominating.

We see Tito Ortiz entering the building from earlier today. Riveting footage, I assure you.

MATCH 2-3-Way Hardcore Rules Match: Gail Kim vs. Knockouts Champion Mickie James vs. ODB (non-title)
James charges at ODB as she’s coming out, and ODB knocks her down. Kim grabs ODB by the hair and pulls her into the ring through the ropes, where ODB hits a series of forearms and a clothesline. James is in, and ODB sends her to the corner. Avalanche for both Kim and James, and now ODB gives James the Clam Buffet until Kim attacks her. James whips ODB down then heads to the outside as Kim mounts ODB for some punches to the head. She grinds her shin into ODB’s face as James throws a chair into the ring. Kim grabs the chair, and ODB kicks it into her. James ducks a clothesline and counters with a neckbreaker. She wedges the chair into the turnbuckles, and the heels double-corner whip ODB into it before both try to pin her for 2. Kim and James begin a shoving match until James rolls her up for 2. They trade punches and kicks until James hits a mule kick to the gut and throws Kim to the outside. ODB hits some forearms on James before Kim yanks her face-first to the floor. Kim rolls ODB back into the ring and looks for a weapon under the ring. James kicks her from behind and sends her face-first into the ring post before getting back into the ring, where a kendo stick has appeared. She hits ODB across the back a couple of times, then hangs her with it in the corner. James hangs her once more, but ODB fights out and whips James down by the stick. She cracks James across the back, then hits one to the gut of Kim. Apparently, one of her two bras is broken, so she rips it off and beals James with it by the throat. She then sends Kim to the outside with it, hanging her through the ropes until James kicks her in the back. James sends ODB shoulder-first into the ring post, then heads outside for a weapon. Meanwhile, Kim locks on the corner figure-4 on ODB, and now James begins yanking on both of ODB’s arms. Kim breaks the hold and gets in James’ face in the ring. ODB gets back in, chugs her flask and spits booze into James’ face. She knocks Kim down with a clothesline, then boots James in the gut as Kim rolls to the floor. She goes for the Bam!, but Kim nails her in the gut with the kendo stick. Kim misses a headshot, and ODB grabs the chair from earlier, dropping Kim onto it with the Bam! for 3.

WINNER: ODB.

Sting is throwing a fit in the back about what just happened. He says they need a replacement, and has an idea. Everyone hates him, but he’s going to go talk to Austin Aries right now, because they need him.

We see Sting enter Aries’ locker room a moment later and sits down to talk. He knows Aries doesn’t feel good about losing. His plate has been full with A and E over the last year. They both hate Bully Ray and the rest of the gang. He also knows Aries is a former World Champion, so he’s asking Aries to a part of the MEM next week. Aries considers himself the main event every time he steps in the ring. It’s a lot to think about. Sting says they don’t have to be friends. Aries hates A and E as much as Sting, so help the MEM out. They need Austin Aries. Aries smiles.

AI stops Bobby Roode to ask about his plan. Roode says timing is everything. He has changed the landscape of the BFG Series with this new faction. He has 20 points on the line later tonight in a Tables Match. If he wins, that puts him in 2nd place in the series. Three weeks ago, he was out of it, and he could be in 2nd. It’ll happen, because it pays to be Roode.

Magnus, Jackson and Joe are talking about Austin Aries. Joe knows him and he’s a problem, but Aries may be their only option. Sting enters and says Aries said no. Jackson has an idea, and he’s going to address it right now. Joe follows him, and Magnus tells Sting to sit down to tell him the plan.

We see Bully Ray on the phone with “honey”. He says their relationship is anything but normal. Just so they’re on the same page, tonight is about him, and next week is about “us”. He’s going to win the title, destroy “that boy”, and then they’ll celebrate at home. She knows exactly how “Calfzilla” likes to celebrate. Next week, they will tell the world truth. He then says, “I love you, too, Brooke.” Why do I get the feeling it was Miss Tessmacher on the phone and not Brooke Hogan? Because this is TNA, and they love stupid crap like this.

Quenton Jackson and Samoa Joe come out to the ring. Jackson begins speaking, and I doze off. He says it’s no secret he’s new here. When he first came to TNA, MMA fans called him a sell-out. It made him sad that his own fans don’t know him. He wrestled in high school and pretends to wrestle when he fights. He loves TNA, and now that he’s part of the MEM, he belongs to a family. He belongs here. He love it! He didn’t come here to get his “ass kicked by punk on a moped”. He didn’t want to do this, but now he gotta axe his own friend he knew way back. Even though they gotta throw down in November, this is TNA, he need help. He calls out Tito Ortiz to come out. Ortiz comes out to his horrendously generic entrance theme, wearing a “Wrestling is Real” shirt in order to try and pander to this crowd that doesn’t care. Jackson says everyone knows they have a fight on November 2nd, and they will try to knock each other out. That’s MMA in November, though. It’s a sport (his words). Right now, we in the MEM need Ortiz’s help. They’ve trained together, and Jackson has never asked him for anything. He still wants a favor, and that’s to have Ortiz join them next week. Jackson says they should make history and take over wrestling like they did MMA. Ortiz says he’s here to make headlines. He’s the longest-reigning light heavyweight champion in MMA history. Jackson wants him to join his tag team match? For the love of all that is sacred, someone please shut both of their microphones off now.

Ortiz’s music hits again while Bully Ray’s entrance “video” shows on the screen, and Bully Ray comes out. Looks like someone screwed up. It’s pretty bad when I’m relieved to see him interrupt someone. He says that, if he didn’t have to win back the title later tonight, he’d get in the ring and beat the piss out of both of them right now. Then, there would be no big Bellator PPV on November 2nd. He’s got Jackson’s number, and as for Ortiz, if he gets in Ray’s way and crosses him, he’ll make Ortiz his Huntington Beach bitch. Ortiz gets all upset as Jackson holds him back. Anderson comes out, and he’s got a match up next.

Here are the updated standings for the BFG Series: 1-Magnus (39); 2-Samoa Joe (26); 3-Mr. Anderson and Jeff Hardy (tie, 24); 5-Christopher Daniels (23); 6-Kazarian and AJ Styles (tie, 22); 8-Austin Aries (21); 9-Hernandez and Bobby Roode (tie, 27); 11-Jay Bradley (0); 12-Joseph Park (-3).

MATCH 3-BFG Series 4-Way Tables Match: Samoa Joe vs. Mr. Anderson vs. Magnus vs. Bobby Roode
This match is also worth 20 points. Magnus attacks Roode as he comes down the ramp before knocking him into the ring as Joe and Anderson fight around ringside. Magnus chops Roode in the corner, and Joe slams Anderson into the guardrail. Roode kicks Magnus in the corner, then heads outside to hit Anderson. He slams Joe face-first into the apron, then slides a table into the ring. He attacks Magnus in the corner, then props the table in the opposite corner. Joe rolls in and stops Magnus from going through the table. He snaps off a powerslam on Roode, and Mr. Anderson attacks Joe from behind. He goes for a rolling fireman’s carry slam, but Magnus stops it with a big boot. Magnus hits a misdirection clothesline on Anderson, and Roode comes in, attacking Magnus with a double axe handle. He foot-chokes Magnus in the corner, then goes back for the table, setting it up near the ropes. Magnus fires off some rights before Roode does the same. Magnus ducks a clothesline, and he & Joe hit a series of moves, ending in a running senton by Joe. They go after Roode and Magnus and look for a double powerbomb through the table. Roode and Anderson fight out, and Roode knocks the table over. He stomps Joe down in the corner as Anderson shoulders Magnus on the opposite side. Joe gets knocked to the floor, and Roode goes outside for another table, setting it up by the ramp. Magnus and Anderson fight outside on the other side as Joe begins chopping Roode. Magnus sends Anderson face-first into a table propped up on the outside, and Joe puts the ring bell on Roode’s crotch before hitting it with a hammer. Meanwhile, Anderson goes for a Mic Check on Magnus from the ramp. Magnus escapes and goes through a powerbomb, but gets a low blow. Joe and Roode trade blows until Joe chops him down. Anderson slams Magnus face-first into a propped-up table before Joe attacks Anderson, knocking him into a chair. He sets Anderson near the guardrail and hits a running boot to the face (although he missed by a mile and kicked the guardrail instead). In the ring, Magnus sets up a table against the turnbuckles and picks up Roode for a running powerslam. Roode escapes and hits a spinebuster. Anderson has a side headlock on Joe at the outside as Roode assaults Magnus in the corner in the ring. Anderson rolls Joe in the ring, and he & Roode now attack the faces in opposite corners before shoving each other. They instead go to shoot the faces into each other, and Joe winds up dropping Roode with a clothesline, sending him to the floor. He ducks an Anderson clothesline and hits a suicide dive. Magnus ducks one from Anderson as well and hits an elevated northern lights bomb. He grabs the tables from the corner and sets it up in the ring. Anderson pops up and hits Magnus with the Mic Check. Joe gets back in and chops Anderson before setting him up for the Muscle Buster. Roode is back in, and he moves the table, preventing Joe from putting Anderson through it. He shoves Joe to the floor and sets the table back up, laying Magnus on top. Roode goes to the top rope, where Joe crotches him. He chops Roode from the apron as Kazarian comes down. Joe boots him to the floor, and Magnus climbs the turnbuckles to meet Roode. Christopher Daniels comes out and throws an appletini in Magnus’ eyes. Roode then powerbombs Magnus through the table out of the corner.

WINNER: Bobby Roode, who picks up 20 points, putting him at 27 and moving him into 2nd place.

The World title match is up next.

AI stops Sting in the back to ask about Tito Ortiz. Sting calls him an asset everywhere, but will he be an asset to the MEM? His gut tells him Ortiz will work out and he’ll be a great asset to the MEM, but also to be careful of what you wish for.

We learn that No Surrender will be a free episode of Impact next month, featuring the finals of the BFG Series.

Mr. Anderson and Bully Ray are in the back. Anderson asks if Ray can do better than he just did against a guy that beat him for the World title. Ray reminds Anderson who threw the hammer into the ring. All week, he’s heard nothing but Sabin beating him twice. Ray doesn’t know if he can beat him now. He then wants to know where everyone is to help him. Anderson says they’re all just trying to help him, and they’re not Ray’s enemy. Ray says he doesn’t seem like much of an ally right now, either.

Next week, Hardcore Justice will apparently continue. There will be another 4-way in the BFG Series, plus the 5-on-5 tag match.

MATCH 4-Cage Match for the World Championship: Bully Ray vs. Chris Sabin (Champion)
If Ray loses, he will not get another World title match in TNA. Sabin has new music yet again. Jeremy Borash does quite possibly the longest match introduction I’ve ever heard. Pretty mixed reaction for Sabin while the crowd chants for Bully Ray. They then boo Ray as he hits a bodyslam. What a dumb crowd. Sabin gets back up, and Ray hits another. Sabin shoves Ray after he talks some trash, and the two now lock up. Ray goes for another slam, hitting a release version this time. Sabin ducks a shot in the corner and hits a pair of armdrags, followed by a dropkick and a forearm shot in the corner. Another forearm, and Ray is knocked down. Sabin hits a baseball slide in the corner before getting sent into the cage. Sabin catches himself and hits a cross-body from the top rope. He goes for the Cradle Shock, but can’t get Ray up. Ray clubs him, but he ducks a clothesline and hits a dropkick to the knee. Sabin climbs up to the top rope, but gets crotched. Ray chops him on the top turnbuckle, then foot-chokes him from the middle rope. Ray presses Sabin and launches him into the cage wall. Commercials.

Back from the break, Ray presses Sabin once more, again throwing him into the wall. The wall actually separated from the rest of the cage, which means someone didn’t make sure everything was tightly put together. Sabin tries to fight back with forearms, but gets a headbutt that knocks him right back down. Ray drags him to the center of the ring, hitting a jumping elbow drop for 2. Ray hits some crossface shots. Sabin tries to fight back from the corner as Ray challenges him to hit him in the face. Sabin responds with forearms to the face and goes for the Cradle Shock once more. He can’t get Ray up, so Ray picks him up in a powerbomb. Sabin escapes and counters into a backslide for 2. Ray gets back up and drops Sabin with a clothesline. Ray begins nailing Sabin in the side of the head, then applies a bearhug. Sabin elbows his way out of the hold, but gets hit with a back body drop off the ropes. Ray goes for a powerbomb once more, and Sabin blocks it with punches before sliding down into a scissored sleeper. Ray backs into the corner to break the hold, then charges in. Sabin blocks and hits a tornado DDT. Both get back to their feet and trade shots. Sabin gets the best of it and hits an enziguri. Sabin pulls Ray’s vest off and picks him up for a Death Valley driver. Sabin grabs the leather vest and begins whipping Ray across the back. Ray pulls himself up in the corner and hits a running boot for 2. Ray hits a Samoan drop for another 2, then whips Sabin with the vest. He begins climbing the cage in the corner, where Sabin cuts him off. They fight on the top rope, with Sabin hitting some kicks. Ray falls back down to the turnbuckle, and Sabin botches a hurricanrana. Ray is screaming that his shoulder is hurting, and Sabin goes for Hail Sabin. Ray blocks it and counters with a suplex. Ray orders for the door to be opened, but Sabin stops him from leaving. He goes under Ray’s legs and tries to escape, but Ray pulls him back in by the foot. Ray goes for a running powerslam, and referee Brian Hebner gets knocked in the head by Sabin’s feet. Sabin escapes, and Ray goes for a standing avalanche. Sabin ducks, causing Ray to sandwich Hebner between himself and the cage wall. Sabin dropkicks Ray into the cage through the ropes, then climbs to the top rope, where he hits a missile dropkick. Sabin goes for the pin, but Hebner is out. Sabin goes to the open door, but Mr. Anderson runs down and slams the door and locks it. Quenton Jackson and Tito Ortiz run down, and Jackson throws Anderson to the floor. Ortiz grabs a hammer that Anderson apparently brought with him and cracks Jackson over the head. Gasp! Heel turn. Even Ray Charles could see that one coming. Meanwhile, in the ring, Ray slams Sabin into the wall then folds Sabin up with a powerbomb. Hebner comes to in time to count the 3.

WINNER AND NEW CHAMPION: Bully Ray. After the match, Ortiz raises Ray’s arm in victory. Taz comes into the ring to celebrate with Ray.

End of show.

-Dustin

Dustin Nichols is a freelance writer, and you can keep track of all of his work on his Facebook page, which can be found at www.facebook.com/DustinNicholsWriter. Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out his mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:

Chris Sabin wins TNA Wrestling Title, Bully Ray Proves Why He is the Best

July 19, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

Is there a better wrestling heel in the business today other than Bully Ray? Judging by the current run of the former TNA World Heavyweight Champion, it is hard to argue with the choice as he has taken the bar and set it just a bit higher than it has been in a while.

By definition, the “heel’ is often portrayed as behaving in an immoral manner, breaking rules or otherwise taking advantage of their opponents outside the bounds of the rules of the match.

While there are some who are tweeners (Wade Barrett, CM Punk, Samoa Joe) the heel is also responsible for being the antagonist, the one who determines the rise and fall of the crowds in the arenas.

Today, the lines are skewed and even the most “likeable” of characters are booed out of the arenas (John Cena).

As a youngster, I was always drawn to the heel role in the business. Whether it was Ric Flair (my all time favorite), Dory and Terry Funk, Arn Anderson or even Rick Rude – they could all use the crowd to their advantage and prove their greatness.

And then, there is Bully Ray.

From the moment he became a solo act (the former tag team partner of Devon in Team 3D) Bully Ray has moved up the ladder, finally joining Aces and Eights and capturing the World Title.
Thursday night, his luck ran out as he lost to Chris Sabin for the title he so coveted.

The reason why Bully Ray’s character works is a combination of size, power, a great voice on the mic, a believeable dislike by fans and the ability to tell a story in the ring. He is a little bit of Ole Anderson, One Man Gang and mix of the Road Warriors without Paul Ellering.

The title switch by TNA is just a blip in Bully Ray’s radar. While having Sabin, a lightweight at 210 pounds, hold the title briefly will add to Bully Ray’s legacy (unless Austin Aries challenges Sabin for the title), where a multiple world champion makes him look more invinceable.

It would have been better if Bobby Roode had won and lost the title on a few ocasions instead of holding it once over a longer period of time.
What also adds to Bully Ray’s “perfect” mix is the story being told. Want to improve your stock in the business, challenge the authority of an immortal like Hulk Hogan.

While having Hogan’s daughter Brooke still involved in the angle is ludacris, but there is a means to an end (maybe she eventually turns on daddy and Hogan and Ray fight over control of the company). At some point, although I hate the idea, we will see the two in the ring together (for said ownership of the country).

I have not been a fan of the Aces and Eights angle because of its slow play, its drab players (Garett Bischoff, Wes Brisco) and until now, no real faction to oppose them (I’ll talk about the brilliance of the Main Event Mafia in another column).

The one thing that has surprised me, is the fact we have not seen Bully Ray and Devon in tag team action more often. Now that he sans title, can the two men focus on the current tag team champions, Gunner and Jame Storm.

It’s simple to say that as long as Bully Ray remains the lead heel in TNA, he will be the best in the business. But TNA needs to keep rolling with its product. While Bully Ray really is a gold mine, other bit parts (Aces and Eights, Hogan, MEM) need to help him remain on that lofty perch.

David is a Featured Columnist for Bleacher Report and can be read here. Follow David on Twitter @davidlevin71

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Bully Ray Talks RVD, Mark Henry Angle, and Being A Heel

July 03, 2013 By: Category: Videos, WWE | Pro Wrestling

Bully Ray is not someone you hear do many interviews so when he does sit down with a live microphone, it is always interesting. The TNA Wrestling champion doesn’t mince words which is what makes this latest 45 minute interview a must-watch.

Bully was in New York recently doing media for an upcoming TNA house show. As great of a talker as Bully is, I can’t recall him doing that many interviews over the last several years which is a shame because he is a fascinating guy. Wrestling with Rosenberg got a hold of him and was able to get the champ to open up immediately for a great 45 minute segment.

Bully of course had a legendary run as half of the Dudley Boys tag team with brother Devon. If there is one thing I hear often about the team it is that they came ten years too late. Rosenberg asked the former WWE, WCW, ECW, and TNA tag team champion the same question who responded with a story about sitting at a bar one night with The Undertaker.

Bully tells a story about sitting at a bar with The Undertaker and a high compliment the Dead Man paid about the Dudley Boys tag team. “Bubba, you and Devon came ten years too late. You and Devon belong back then.”

I kind of agree with that although I think what was great about the Dudleys is that they were innovators in their own era. As great as they were, I think they had more impact in their ECW and WWE runs than they would have had in the 1980s. Of course this is all a matter of opinion.

One of the things that Bully does so well is get booed. It is almost impossible for a heel to get over today like a heel would in past eras. Bully is an exception and he was asked if it was hard to be a heel in 2013?

“No. Honestly I cannot say the same things in 2013 that I was saying in 1996, 97, 98, that time no. But I do believe that I have something unique to my speaking ability that makes people hate me. That’s my tone. My voice comes across like sandpaper. I know how to say things and certain trigger words that get under people’s skin.”
The interview went in another direction and Rosenberg started talking about some WWE topics. Bully was asked about the Mark Henry angle and Bully is just as much a fan of it as most of us were.

“To do what he did that other night, take those people down an emotional roller coaster , he brought them to such a level where they were crying for him, they were so into him, they were so respectful to him, “Oh my God Mark we want to send you off with open arms and give you a big hug and we love you so much thank you for busting you’re a$% for us”, and then he shoved it straight up their a$$es.”

Finally Bully was asked about Rob Van Dam coming back to the WWE. Bully gave an interesting answer as he and Rosenberg discussed how Rob fit it into the WWE today in a more structured environment than he was used to. Bully is excited to see him back.

“I am (excited to see him back) and knowing Rob as well as I do and working with him as much as I haveand just knowing the state of the industry today, it’s more of a conform…it just will be interesting. He’s a free spirit and when I talk about a free spirit I talk about a free spirit as an entertainer in the middle of the ring, I’m not talking about personal life. In WWE sometimes you can’t be as much of that free spirit as you want to be, you can’t be the version of yourself you want to be, sometimes you feel a little stifled. So that’s what I’m going to be real interested in seeing.

These are just highlights of a fantastic interview. Bully goes into great depth about his run in ECW, how he got into ECW, Paul Heyman, the fan riots in ECW, working with Hulk Hogan, putting Mae Young through a table, and a lot more.

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TNA Impact Wrestling Results and May 2 Recap

May 04, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

Shock of shocks, Hulk Hogan is opening this week’s Impact. On a side note for a moment, I would like to thank friend of CCB Brett Clendaniel, Jr. for his kind words in regards to my writing, especially in regards to my Impact recaps. Loyal support such as his makes this gig worthwhile. Anyway, Hogan says things almost came to blows between him and Sting last week, so we need to find out exactly what’s up with Sting right now. Sting makes his way out, and he very cautiously approaches the ring. Hogan tells him that all the business between them is out there, so let’s call things like we see them. Last week didn’t end with a pretty picture, and they almost came to blows. Before that, though, Hogan knows when he is right and wrong.

He got caught up between a bunch of personal stuff and business stuff. At the end of the day, when it came to making choices, Hogan was wrong, and he ran some of his friends off. The one he made the biggest mistake with was Sting, so he’s apologizing for that right now. Hogan offers a handshake, and Sting accepts. Hogan continues on, saying he should have been pulling Sting closer, and they should have been working together against Aces and Eights. Sting tells him they are together right now. It’s water under the bridge, and now, he has a request. He wants a 6-man next week against A and E, with him picking two partners. Hogan agrees to it. Tonight, however, the business at hand is to determine who faces Bully Ray at Slammiversary for the title.

Matt Morgan comes out and says that this is the part when Hogan hands a jerk-off another title match. Has he learned nothing? Hogan tells him his biggest fault is him running his mouth without knowing everything. From now on, there are no more handouts, and everyone who wants a top spot has to earn it. Before Morgan got in his face, he was going to say that the man who faces Bully Ray will not be Sting or Morgan. The man who takes that spot will be the winner of the main event tonight when it’s Matt Morgan vs. Sting. That’s what Hogan sees in his crystal ball, brother.

Video package for Chris Sabin, and he reflects on his back-to-back knee injuries and the rehabilitation process following them. Sabin has rehabbed for two full years worth of time across the two injuries. He is in action up next in his first match back.

Kurt Angle is pacing in the training room. He says Aces and Eights have taken over the company and taken the title, and tonight, he challenges any of those sonsofbitches to faces him in the ring one-on-one. They can beat him, but they can’t stop him.

MATCH 1-3-Way X-Division Match: Sonjay Dutt vs. Zema Ion vs. Chris Sabin
Dutt gets the jobber non-entrance, so hope for him is already very low. Sabin finally has new music. Ion slaps Sabin, and now Sabin & Dutt punch him, knocking him to the floor. Crisscross ends with a running hurricanrana by Dutt, followed by a deep armdrag into an armbar. Dutt breaks the hold to knock Ion off the apron before going back to Sabin. Sabin with a sunset flip, but Dutt lays on top of him. Sabin escapes and hits an enziguri for 2. They trade waistlocks with Sabin ending up on top. Ion comes in with a slingshot sunset flip, sending them both over and getting 2 on Sabin. Ion chokes Sabin in the corner, then hits a double kneedrop to the back. Dutt gets a hotshot from Ion, and Sabin comes back up and hits some chops. Ion pulls Sabin down by the hair, and the three end up in a weird backslide pin for 2. Sabin turns Ion into a modified surfboard, and Dutt breaks that up with a dropkick to Ion’s face. We learn that, in next week’s 3-way, Suicide makes his return. Yay. Wonder which member of Bad Influence will be playing the part? Anyway, Dutt hits some forearms on Sabin and goes for the Asai DDT, but Sabin counters into a fireman’s carry. Dutt escapes and hits a spinning headscissors that he turns into a DDT. Running shooting star press by Dutt, but Ion breaks up the pin. Dutt gets up and hits Ion, but Ion blocks a kick and hits a quick DDT for 2. Ion goes for a back suplex, but Dutt escapes and blocks a roll-up. He hits a thrust kick on Ion and Sabin hits a kick on Dutt before dropping Ion with a clothesline. Sabin counters a hurricanrana into a powerbomb on Dutt, then holds on and turns it into a DVD. Dutt gets placed in the Tree of Woe, and Ion gets overhead belly-to-belly suplexed into Dutt. Sabin hits a sit-out Y2K Bomb on Ion for 3.

WINNER: Chris Sabin.

We see Jesse and Robbie E in the back rambling about some movie Jesse is starring in, then it turns into something about facing Rob Terry in a 3-on-1 handicap match. He holds up a picture of Joey Ryan, telling E that he should be their other partner.

Elsewhere, we see Bully Ray, with A and E behind him. He talks about Hogan and Sting mocking the group. They’re the frickin’ Aces and Eights. Nobody mocks them. Now he’s gotta worry about Morgan vs. Sting. Newsflash: he ain’t worrying about either one. No matter who he gets in Boston, he’ll get the job done. That brings us to Kurt Angle. Angle has been a thorn in the club’s ass since day one. No matter how hard they knock him down, he keeps getting back up. He wants Angle taken out, the same way Ray took care of Hardy. Who’s it gonna be? Wes Brisco steps up and says he wants it. Garett Bischoff then volunteers. D’Lo Brown steps between them and says he’ll do it. He’s been responsible for Aces and Eights, and he’s going to be the one responsible for taking out Angle. He guarantees he’ll get the job done, then swears his “colors” on. You know, I’ve wanted D’Lo in a main event since never. Good for TNA for making a nightmare into reality.

MATCH 2-3-on-1 Handicap Match: Jesse, Robbie E and Joey Ryan vs. Rob Terry
Ryan starts the match for his team and immediately gets clubbed down. He crawls to the corner, and Terry hits him with a running back elbow, followed by a back body drop. Jesse distracts Terry by pulling his tights, and Terry kicks him to the floor. Ryan attacks Terry’s knee and tags Jesse in, who hits some shots. E tags in and hits some forearms to the back. Jesse back in, and he begins kicking Terry. E back in, and he hits some forearms before applying a sleeper. Terry picks him up on his back, then rams E into the corner to break the hold. Terry misses a corner charge, and E capitalizes with some shoulder thrusts. Ryan tags in, and he has words with E for a moment before getting hit with a front powerslam. The three attack Terry, and he shoves them all off before hitting them with clotheslines and back elbows. Double back suplex on E and Jesse, and Ryan gets hit with what is apparently now called the Beast Bomb for 3.

WINNER: Rob Terry.

We see Austin Aries and Bobby Roode in the building. They’re apparently on their way to the ring.

Roode and Aries make their way out. Roode says Bad Influence played their mind games last week, and it got into his head a bit. They talked about reforming Fourtune, but this was never really about that. This was about BI’s jealousy of Roode and Aries & the World Tag Team titles, the same titles BI cost them last week. Aries says he didn’t believe BI for a second. BI are best friends. He and Roode barely like each other. But, they like each other enough to achieve a common goal. They don’t tell jokes; they go out to win championships. They are a team of World Champions, something Christopher Daniels and Kazarian will never know a thing about. BI make their way out on this note. Daniels tells Roode he was right about one thing: it was about the championships. However, Roode and Aries were wrong about being the next champions or even being a good team. Everyone knows they are a pale imitation of the best team in the business. Next week, the two teams face off with a title match on the line. Spoiler alert: it’s Bad Influence. Roode reminds us he cracked a beer bottle over his best friend’s head to be World Champion, and he’ll do whatever it takes with Aries to become champions again. Kaz says they can never “out-us us”, and Aries/Roode are nothing but Bad Influence-lite.

Now it’s time for Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez to make this segment intolerable. Chavo says time for talk is over, and it’s time for action. Next week, there will be action. Hulk Hogan named a special referee for next week’s match. As much as he or Hernandez would love that spot, it’s neither of them. The referee likes to count in 6 and 12-packs. Yep, it’s James Storm.

Sting enters the training room, where Kurt Angle is taping his knee. Sting asks him if he’s ready, then says he needs a minute alone with Angle.

Tara and Gail Kim are in a dressing room somewhere, complaining about Taryn Terrell. Kim says they need to embarrass her and Mickie James tonight, and she’s going to make sure she gets the victory.

We get another Chris Sabin video, with this one filmed just after the match from earlier tonight. He’s glad to be back, and it’s the greatest feeling in the world.

Angle/Brown is up next. As the two are in the ring, the fans begin chanting “U-S-A!”. Makes sense, since we all know D’Lo Brown is from Lichtenstein. Before the match, Brown says he told his brothers he’d beat Angle in the middle of the ring. But as he stands here, that won’t be good enough. He needs to humiliate Angle, so tonight, he’s going to do something no one has ever done before: he’s going to beat Angle in an “I Quit” Match.

MATCH 3-“I Quit” Match: D’Lo Brown vs. Kurt Angle
Ugh. I can’t believe I have to recap this. Oh, wait. It’s TNA. Of course I can believe it. I just wish I didn’t have to. As Angle agrees to the match stipulation, Brown hits him in the head with the mic. Angle comes back with rights and a clothesline. Single-leg takedown by Angle, and he turns it into a modified STF. The ref asks if Brown wants to quit, and he won’t. We see Mr. Anderson and a couple other A and E members come to ringside through the crowd. Angle gets distracted, which allows Brown to hit a suplex. He rolls to the outside, dragging Angle to the floor and throwing him shoulder-first intot he ring post. He grabs the ring bell hammer and goes to nail Angle, but Angle moves. Brown continues the attack on the left arm, wrapping it around the post. Angle won’t quit, so Brown slams the arm into the mat and rolls Angle back in the ring. Snapmare by Brown, and he begins stomping on the arm before hitting a legdrop. Brown with an arm wringer now, but Angle fights out before running into a jumping side kick. Thanks to the extra 100 lbs., Brown could barely get himself up there. Brown applies a jujigatame, and Angle says, “Hell no!” in response to whether or not he wants to quit. Angle breaks the hold by countering into the ankle lock, but Brown kicks him off and hits a clothesline. Taz tells us Brown has never looked better. Uh-huh. Brown applies a cobra clutch, and Angle still won’t quit. Angle armdrags out of it, ducks a clothesline and hits the Murder-Suicide. After three, Angle holds on for a fourth. Then a fifth. Brown tells the referee to kick his ass, and Angle hits a sixth German suplex. I remember a dead guy once doing that. Wonder if he somehow stole it from Angle, despite doing it several years beforehand? I’m sure we’ll find out in a supposedly drunken tweet. Angle applies the ankle lock, but Brown kicks him off once more. Angle charges in, and Brown counters into a Samoan drop. Brown is back up first, and he sets Angle up for a powerbomb. Angle counters into a sunset flip and rolls through into an ankle lock. Brown tries to fight out, but Angle cinches it in and grapevines the leg. Brown taps, but that doesn’t count, and the ref reminds him of such. Brown then screams “I quit!” into the mic.

WINNER: Kurt Angle. Aces and Eights head back through the crowd without taking Brown with them. Christy Hemme stops Angle on the ramp and asks if this was revenge for him. Angle says he won a battle, but now he has his mind on someone else, and that is AJ Styles. He wants AJ out here right now and knows he’s here. Commercials.

Back from the break, Angle is still in the ring calling for AJ Styles to come out. Another “U-S-A!” chant breaks out. This also makes sense, since AJ is originally from Vatican City. AJ finally comes down the ramp and gets in the ring, getting in Angle’s face in the process. Angle backs up and says AJ doesn’t look the same, like he wants to take Angle’s head off. Before he does that, he won’t get very far since this is Angle’s hometown (it’s actually not). So, everyone wants to recruit AJ. Going with A and E would be the easy way out. Angle has taken the easy way and gotten a lot of success, but that’s not AJ’s way. AJ is the reason he came to TNA, and they had some of the greatest matches of all time. He knows AJ is in a dark time and he understands that, but next week, he and Sting are taking on A and E, and they need him. If AJ stands with them, that’s cool. If not, they have problems. Next week, the choice belongs to AJ.

AI asks Matt Morgan about waiting for tonight’s opportunity. Morgan screams and rants about how he’s pissed off, and tonight, he’s taking the ball. Tonight, he “guts through” Sting, and at Slammiversary, he “guts through” Bully Ray, and you’re looking at the next World Champion. GAARRRRRHHHH!

MATCH 4: Gail Kim and Tara vs. Taryn Terrell and Mickie James
Taryn begins attacking both heels until Tara holds her for a shot. James grabs Kim from behind, and the faces ram their heads together, knocking them to the floor. Kim and Tara argue as Taryn kicks them both through the ropes before rolling Kim back in the ring. Kim gets sent to the corner for a clothesline. James makes a blind tag. Taryn hits a snapmare, and James hits a seated dropkick for 2. James botches a rolling jujigatame, but Kim gets to the ropes. As James argues with referee ODB, Kim nails her with a shot. They trade punches until Kim kicks James in the gut and hits some forearms to the face. James ducks a clothesline and botches an enziguri for 2. Kim backs James into the corner with a shoulder thrust, but James blocks a charge with a back elbow. Kim blocks the Tunacanrana, but knocks James to the floor as Tara causes a distraction. Tara rolls James back in the ring, where Kim hits a short-arm clothesline. She throws James into Tara’s boot, and now Tara tags in, with the heels double-stomping James to the mat. Tara hangs James by her hair, then drops her on her face. Tara drops an elbow for 2 before knocking Taryn to the floor. Back to James, Tara applies an inverted STF, and Taryn breaks up the hold with a stomp. Kim back in, and she throws James to the corner. This time, James connects with the Tunacanrana, and then both women go for a cross-body at the same time, crashing in the middle of the ring. Tara and Taryn tag in, and Taryn hits a couple of clotheslines, a back elbow and a snap suplex. Up top, Taryn connects with a cross-body for 2 as Kim breaks it up. James comes in and botches a roundhouse on Kim. Tara knocks James down, and Taryn rolls Tara up for the 3.

WINNERS: Mickie James and Taryn Terrell. It’s a bit disturbing that Kenely kept referring to Taryn as a “hot mess”. After the match, Tara and Kim attack the faces. James and Tara brawl up the ramp as Kim beats on Taryn in the ring, hitting Eat Defeat and ramming Taryn’s head into the mat before dragging her to the ringpost for Bret Hart’s figure-4 around the post spot until ODB and several other referees break up the hold.

We see Aces and Eights in the back once more, and Bully Ray is pissed about D’Lo Brown saying “I quit” earlier tonight. Brown swore his “colors” on victory and said, “I quit”? Garett starts talking smack, and Ray says that, just because Brown was a douche to him doesn’t mean he can be a douch to Brown. He’s going to take care of Brown next week. Also next week is the 6-man, and he’s picking Devon and Anderson as his partners.

Bobby Roode talks about Bad Influence and how neither member has been World Champion while he and Austin Aries have. They will, without a shadow of a doubt, walk into Tupelo, MS and become the new #1 contenders, and Chavo & Hernandez know they can’t hold a candle to Roode and Aries.

MATCH 5-Winner becomes the new #1 Contender for the World Championship: Matt Morgan vs. Sting
Looks like TNA is having Morgan wear Hogan’s cape again. Lock-up to start the match, and Morgan immediately backs Sting into the corner for a kneelift before headbutting Sting to the mat. Morgan with a foot choke near the ropes, but Sting begins to fight back. Morgan cuts him off with a kneelift, then follows up with a clothesline. Morgan chokes Sting in the corner, then hits another headbutt. Sting fights back with punches and backhands until Morgan goozles him and hits a chokeslam for 2. Commercials.

Back from the break, Morgan is dominating sting on the outside. Sting tries a comeback and manages to slam Morgan into the steps. Morgan no-sells it, hits a kneelift and rolls Sting back in the ring, where he foot-chokes him. Morgan rolls outside and drags Sting’s head to the apron, where he hits an apron legdrop. Morgan gets back on the apron for another one, but misses it when Sting rolls out of the way. Sting throws Morgan into the guardrail, then throws him into it on the opposite side of the ring. Sting rakes the eyes and slams Morgan’s face into the steps before rolling him into the ring. Morgan reverses a corner whip and hits Sting with a sidewalk slam for 2. Morgan chokes Sting, then sits across Sting’s back a couple of times. Morgan then goes for the pin after mocking Hogan, getting 2. Morgan hits a short-arm clothesline, and Sting comes back with some rights. Morgan cuts him off with a kneelift again and hits a bodyslam before missin an elbow drop. Sting avoids a corner charge and hits some rights, followed by a pair of clotheslines. Sting with a slo-mo Stinger Splash, but Morgan shakes it off and throws Sting to the corner for some back elbow strikes. Sting no-sells and throws Morgan to the corner for a clothesline and goes for the Stinger Splash once more, but runs into the Carbon Footprint for 2. Sting goes to the corner and Morgan calls for the Footprint again. He very weakly misses it in the corner, and Sting kicks him in the leg a few times before applying the scorpion deathlock, barely getting it on. After a minute or so, Morgan manages to get a rope break. Sting drags him back into the ring and reapplies the hold, getting him into the center of the ring, but still applying it pretty weakly. Sting eventually sits all the way down onto Morgan’s back, and Morgan eventually passes out.

WINNER AND NEW #1 CONTENDER: Sting. TNA basically lifted the Austin/Hart spot from Wrestlemania 13, minus the blood, only it wasn’t nearly as good. As Sting is celebrating, Aces and Eights come to the ring and surround Sting, with Bully Ray talking trash.

End of show.

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WWE: WrestleMania 29 DVD

WWE: For All Mankind- The Life and Career of Mick Foley- with Mr. Socko Sock Puppet (Limited Edition)

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TNA Wrestling Planning Hulk Hogan Vs. Bully Ray Match

May 02, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

Hulk Hogan just can’t seem to get away from the pro wrestling ring. After several surgeries and doctor’s warnings it appears that plans are in motion for one more comeback which could result in TNA fans calling the Hulkster their new world champion.

Dave Meltzer reports in the latest issue of The Wrestling Observer that the current plan moving forward is for a Hulk Hogan vs. Bully Ray match on an upcoming TNA Wrestling pay per view and whether Hogan can physically go or not, may not alter this plan.

If Hogan is physically able, and perhaps even if he’s not, the Bound for Glory main event idea right now does appear to be Hogan vs. Bully Ray. The date is just my speculation, but Hogan vs. Ray is the ultimate direction, and after Slammiversary (Ray vs. Sting), the next PPV is Bound for Glory.

That is a bit of a shocker if you ask me, especially considering all of the reports that have come out over the last several years about Hogan not being able to wrestle ever again. Even just a few months ago Hogan was in court over a lawsuit stating that he couldn’t physically wrestle anymore, which according to him cost him a WrestleMania payoff against John Cena.

Well at least it would appear he’ll get his Bound for Glory payoff.

This would at least justify the direction TNA has been going over the last year. The storyline between Bully and Hulk has been solid for the most part, yet hasn’t made a lot of sense to observers who felt that there would be no payoff here. If Hogan really is on board for a match, than I really see no issues with the storyline. At the same time Hogan has built storylines around an eventual match in TNA in the past which never culminated so I am dubious at best regarding this master plan.

Hogan gave an interview a few months back where he said his goal was to win the TNA world championship at 60. Presumably that would mean that this Bully vs. Hulk match ends with Hogan’s hand raised and the title wrapped around his waist. I couldn’t think of a more embarrassing champion for TNA to present to its fans in 2013 than an immobile Hogan walking around with the company world title.

There is also something really sad at this point about seeing Hogan hold on. The man is 60-years old and arguably the most recognizable wrestler in the history of professional wrestling. One would think that the man made plenty of money in the 1980s and 90s to live a comfortable life away from the ring. I really never had a problem with Hogan being used as an authority figure. Yet focusing an entire company around your match at 60 when you can barely move sounds a lot more driven by ego than it does by business smarts in my opinion.

What about the letdown factor here? There is no way that this match will be any good. Hogan vs. Sting a few years back was both sad and pathetic. Hulk is shot and looks awkward just walking to the ring. I can already see how this ends with Hogan turning on someone and building another year around him feuding with someone else. TNA has been focused around Hulk now since he arrived in 2010 and business isn’t up. As a matter of a fact it has been so bad that they wound up cutting out most of their pay per views. What will the fallout be from any of these fans that do buy the show and are treated to a terrible match and another screwy finish?

I have a lot of respect for Hulk and I grew up watching him. But at some point someone has to be smart enough (ahem Dixie) to see what is going on here. If Hulk brought in results I’d shut up about it but he’s not. The idea of seeing Hulk in the ring one more time is not only a turnoff, it makes me want to turn TNA off now.

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TNA Impact Wrestling Results and April 25 Recap

April 28, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

TNA Impact Wrestling opens with Aces and Eights entering the building and being stopped by security. Bully Ray isn’t impressed and tells them to get out of their way, or “Mr. A#$hole” will bite their faces off. Uh, yeah…

We’re apparently in Indiana, PA this week. In the arena, James Storm makes his way out. Storm is limping from AJ Styles’ “Calf Killer” from last week. Yes, that’s the name for AJ’s new finisher. Storm talks about fighting AJ last week, and we see AJ standing in the crowd. Storm tells him the new hold hurt like hell, and he can also admit AJ was the better man. However, he’s not going to cry over spilt milk because he’s a beer drinker. What he didn’t sign up for last week was the “Aces and Idiots” that jumped him from behind. If they wanted a fight, all they had to do was ask. He knows if he calls one of them out, all of them will come out. That’s fine. Bring all you want, because he’ll take you out.

Bad Influence make their way out. Christopher Daniels says BI wants to weigh in. Last week, they were victims of A and E as well. Hulk Hogan doesn’t have an answer to this problem. However, the two smartest men in the room know the answer. Aces and Eights has been playing a numbers game. TNA has the magic number, and that’s four, as in “Fourtune”. Kazarian tells AJ that life can be better, and first off is forgiving himself for his cheap shots on them last week. They forgive him. The next step is to walk down the stairs, get in the ring and reform Fourtune tonight, because it’s the right thing to do. Storm says the fans want BI to shut the hell up. Kaz won’t shut up because the people don’t concern them. Just like these people, Storm is irrelevant. He starts brawling with BI until Kaz absolutely botches a Golden Globes spot in the corner. AJ is still staring on as A and E come through the crowd into the ring. BI have left, and Storm is alone in the ring. They surround him and Mr. Anderson grabs him in the powerbomb position as the other members bring a table into the ring. Joesph Park runs down and takes down a couple members of the group until they gang-attack him. D’Lo Brown sets the table back up, and DOC & Knux go to double chokeslam him. Bully Ray tells them to back off so he and Devon can hit the 3D through the table, which they do.

Back from the break, Park is being hauled out on a stretcher. Bully Ray has a mic and says he told everyone A and E weren’t screwing around. They are the Aces and Eights. They are the men responsible for all of the carnage. They are the men responsible for taking out everyone’s heroes. Look around. You ain’t got no heroes left (his words). No Samoa Joe. No Magnus. No James Storm. No Joseph Park. Nobody. Last week, he called out one man, and that was Hulk Hogan, his next victim. Dad, you’ve got ‘til the end of the show to answer the challenge. When you ride with the Aces and Eights, you never walk alone.

According to Mike Tenay, Hulk Hogan has left the building and didn’t tell anyone why.

Video for tonight’s Knockouts Championship match with comments from Mickie James. She talks about being tired of being ignored in TNA. Just a thought, but maybe if she wasn’t off recording awful country music that no one likes, maybe she wouldn’t get ignored.

AI sees Hulk Hogan entering the building, and asks him where he went. Hulk ignores him.

MATCH 1: Taryn Terrell vs. Tara
Taryn ducks a clothesline and hits some forearms, followed by a corner clothesline and a flipping neckbreaker. Pair of hairmares by Taryn, and she then rams Tara’s head into the top turnbuckle until Tara hits her with a Stun Gun. Tara slams Taryn’s face into the mat a few times, then hair-whips her across the ring. Catapult in the corner by Tara, and she goes back to slamming Taryn’s face into the mat. Tara applies an inverted STF, then snaps back to break the hold and goes for the cover, getting 2. Another pin, and another 2-count. Taryn blocks a back body drop, but runs right into a tree slam. Taryn fights back from her knees until Tara forearms in the back of the head, getting 2. She rolls Taryn over for another pin, getting 2 once more. Tara rolls Taryn under the bottom rope and catapults her into the rope for another 2. Tara once again goes for an immediate second pin attempt, then does it again. Bodyslam near the ropes, but Tara misses the Arabian Facebuster. Taryn fights out of the corner and hair-whips Tara, hits a clothesline, a back elbow and a suplex. Up top, Taryn misses a cross-body, and Tara begins with the trash-talk. She picks Taryn up in the Spider’s Web, which connects. Taryn counters the standing moonsault into a schoolgirl and gets 3.

WINNER: Taryn Terrell.

Robbie T is in the back texting someone. Didn’t know he still worked here. Jesse enters the room, and he’s apparently taking on Rob Terry. E verbally fellates Jesse and tells him that, when he beats Terry, he’ll go down as one of the greatest bros of all time, and E will be there right by his side.

Before the next match, Robbie E comes out to introduce the man who will beat Rob Terry, bro. He’s a real Hollywood superstar unlike all of the hamsters in Indiana, PA: “Mr. Pec-Tacular”, Jesse Godderz, bro.

MATCH 2: Rob Terry vs. Jesse (w/Robbie E)
Terry immediately hits a pair of clotheslines and a back elbow. Corner whip into a running powerslam by Terry, but he drops Jesse as E jumps up on the apron. Jesse charges in, and Terry goozles him and backs him to a corner before throwing him across the ring. E jumps on the apron again as Terry charges in, and Jesse hits him from behind with some kicks and elbows. He tries to throw Terry into the corner, but Terry blocks it and throws him in for some forearm shots. He misses a running elbow, and Jesse hits a dropkick. Jesse hits some forearms to the chest and gets a 1-count. Terry shoves him off, so he mounts the middle rope. Terry catches the cross-body attempt and hits an over-the-shoulder powerslam for 2 as E pulls at the referee’s leg. Terry goes outside and stalks E. Jesse tries to attack from behind, but Terry sees it coming and throws Jesse into E before pressing Jesse back into the ring. Terry hits the Freakbuster and gets 3.

WINNER: Rob Terry.
Bad Influence approach Bobby Roode in the locker room area. Kaz says there’s only one way to stop A and E, and that’s Fourtune. They were a dominant faction, and that dominance was taken away from them. Daniels cuts in and says that no one knows AJ better than him. If the three of them stand together, there’s no way AJ can say “no” to them. Think about it. The camera pans over, and we see that Austin Aries has been eavesdropping on the conversation.

Video package for Chris Sabin, who is set to return any time now. I just hope he took enough time away this time. If you recall last time, he was out with an injured knee, came back, and injured it again only a couple of weeks after his return.

We see Aries and Roode warming up in the back. Aries asks Roode about the Fourtune reunion. If Roode wants to do that, that’s his business. They’re not best friends; just dominant champions. If Fourtune was so great, how come they vanished? If BI are so great, how come Aries was the man who beat Roode? Tonight, he wants the tag belts back, and if Roode doesn’t want to work with him, he’s screwing himself.

MATCH 3-World Tag Team Championship: Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez (Champions) vs. Austin Aries and Bobby Roode
Christopher Daniels is on commentary for this match, with Kazarian at his side. Aries and Chavo start the match, and the crowd is not even remotely into the champions. Lock-up to start, with Aries going into an arm wringer. Chavo counters into a snapmare, goes for the pin, and we get a stalemate immediately. Aries applies a side headlock into a waistlock takedown, then shows off a bit before Chavo dropkicks him. Chavo hits a European uppercut, then fires off some rights in the corner. Aries gets sent hard into the opposite corner, and Chavo hits a back suplex for 2. Chavo ducks a clothesline and goes for a headscissors, and Aries counters into a pancake. Roode reluctantly tags in and gets hit with a hiptoss. Hernandez in, and they do their bodyslam/Warrior Splash spot for 2. Hernandez goes for a suplex off a back body drop attempt, but Hernandez counters into a delayed vertical. Aries comes in and chops Hernandez, so Hernandez Warrior Presses him before heading outside to the ramp. He goes for Air Mexico, but Roode moves out of the way and Hernandez eats canvas. Roode gets 2 off a pin, then throws Hernandez to the corner for some punches and kicks. Aries tags in as Roode hits a suplex, and Aries hits a tope con hilo for 2. Back up, Aries boxes the ears and tags in Roode. Hernandez tries to fight out of the corner, but Roode cuts him off and hits a pair of Venis kneelifts, followed by a side-Russian legsweep for 2. Aries tags in and stomps Hernandez in the chest as Roode holds him in a modified surfboard. Aries applies a front chancery, then breaks it to knock Chavo to the floor. Roode back in, and sends Aries in for the corner dropkick. Hernandez catches him, however, and then sends him to the corner. Chavo tags in and hits a tope con hilo on Aries, followed by a spinning headscissors on Roode. Chavo goes for the 3 Amigos, but Aries escapes the second suplex. Chavo comes back with a rolling kick, then hits a tornado DDT on Roode for 2 as Aries breaks it up. Hernandez comes in and clotheslines Aries to the floor. He goes for the Border Toss on Roode as Chavo climbs to the top. Kaz causes a distraction as Aries pushes Chavo off the top. In the ring, Roode hits a spinebuster on Hernandez, and now Aries goes up top. Hernandez kicks Roode off into the corner, which sends Aries crashing to the floor. Hernandez goes for the Border Toss on Roode once more as Kaz is back up on the apron. Daniels slides into the ring and kicks Hernandez. He goes for a clothesline, but Hernandez ducks, causing Daniels to collide with Roode. Hernandez sends Daniels to the floor, and Chavo hits a frog splash on Roode for the 3.

WINNERS AND STILL CHAMPIONS: Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez.

AI approaches Matt Morgan in the weight room. Morgan recites the same promo he always does. He then says he has a solution to the A and E problem, and he’s going out to the ring to tell everyone what it is.

Matt Morgan comes out and says his issues over the last year have been about one issue (?): Mistakes made by Hulk Hogan. He then lists off Hulk’s mistakes. Bully Ray won the title, A and E are stronger than ever, and the company is imploding around Hulk. Sting was ejected from TNA, and now, Jeff Hardy has been laid out. You see, Hulk, before you come out and go face-to-face with Bully Ray, allow Morgan to present to you the ultimate solution to all of your problems. I hope he’s not talking about Jeep Swenson. Hulk Hogan comes out. Morgan tells Hulk he has no more backup, so by going out against Ray by himself, he’s delaying the inevitable, which is that A and E are going to destroy him. Hulk has no one left, so Morgan presents the solution: himself. Hulk, at the end of the day, no one wants this opportunity more than him. No one on this roster can eliminate A and E better than him. He is Hulk’s 7’ knight in shining armor. And, if given the opportunity tonight, he will Carbon Footprint Ray’s head into the 5th row…for a small price, of course. Morgan is all Hulk has, so he’ll handle Ray, and in turn, Hulk names Morgan the #1 contender at Slammiversary. Hulk says Morgan has brought him up to the edge, and a lot of what is being said is true. Morgan has the goods to get the job done, and he probably could do it. At the end of the day though, he was hoping Morgan would do the right thing. Morgan stole his robe and has verbally abused him day-after-day. Hulk hoped Morgan would be the 2nd coming of “The Mania”, brother. At the end of the day, though, Morgan wants to do it for the wrong reason. If he agrees to Morgan’s demands, it’ll be a bigger mistake than what happened with Ray. At the end of the day, he’s going to step into the ring with Ray and do this by himself. He’s not going to hand over anything to Morgan, and he never heard Andre the Giant whine like a bitch.

We see A and E in the back somewhere, celebrating taking out Joseph Park. Ray then says Hulk is held together by spit and glue and wants to go face-to-face with Ray. He then tells the rest of the group that he doesn’t want them out there with him.

Now, TNA is doing this where fans can vote who will be involved in the next triple threat match for the X-Division championship. The three options are just wonderful: Rashad Cameron, Rockstar Spud and Suicide. Yes, they’re trying to dust off that pile of crap gimmick again. Guess they didn’t learn from the fact that basing a character on a character from one of the worst wrestling games of all time wasn’t a good idea.

MATCH 4-Knockouts Championship: Mickie James vs. Velvet Sky (Champion)
Lock-up, with Sky going into an armbar. James counters into an armdrag for 1, then applies an arm wringer. Sky flips through and trips James for 1. James dodges a dropkick and gets 1 off a pin. Sky applies a side headlock, then shoulders James off the ropes. Crisscross ends in a Snapmare by Sky, followed by a kick to the back and a seated dropkick for 2. Sky hits some forearms and shoulder thrusts in the corner. James counters a whip, and Sky leaps over her back to avoid the charge. However, she acts like her knee hurts, and James goes for the pin, getting 2. James then applies a step-over toehold as we go to commercials.

Back from the break, James has Sky in a legbar, then yanks on the knee before going back to the toehold. Sky rolls up and counters into her own, and James counters into a sloppy STF. Sky breaks the hold with the ropes, then kicks James off. Sky elbows out of the corner, hits a pair of jumping clotheslines, then remembers to sell her knee. Some chops to the chest, but James blocks them and goes for a corner whip. Sky collapses to the mat before she gets to the corner. She blocks a roll-up attempt and hits a side-Russian legsweep for 2. James gets back up, kicks the bad knee and botches an enziguri. Up top, James hits a Thesz Press for 2. Sky gets back up, boots James in the stomach and goes for In Yo Face, but James counters into a back body drop. James boots Sky in the stomach and goes for the standing tornado, but Sky pushes her off into the corner. James dropkicks the bad knee, then goes for a roll-up, but Sky counters into her own roll-up for the 3, despite the fact that James was in the ropes.

WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Velvet Sky.

We see Devon and Bully Ray in the back, and Ray tells Devon he’s done with Brooke, so Devon can have her. He reminds Devon they’re the greatest team of all time and are both now singles champions, leading a pack of wolves. He took out Jeff Hardy last week, and Hardy may be done for good. In a few minutes, he’s going to look straight into his father-in-law’s soul, and he’s going to be the guy who puts the final nail in the coffin of Hulkamania.

Brooke and Hulk Hogan are in the back, and Brooke is trying to talk Hulk out of going to the ring. Hulk says Bully Ray screwed over their family and the business, and he needs to stop it. Brooke reminds him he just had a knee replacement a few weeks ago, and that he can’t do this. Hulk tells her she can’t stop this, then asks for her hand and gives her his necklace, saying he’ll be right back.

Bully Ray makes his way out alone with a paper in his hand. It’s a list of everyone A and E has taken out, and D’Angelo Dinero is mentioned. I realize they took him out, but it’s odd hearing his name since he hasn’t been seen on TV in months. I honestly had forgotten he still worked in TNA. Anyway, Ray says what all these names have in common is that he and his boys took them all out, and there’s only one victim left. Hulk Hogan, get out here right now. Hulk comes out with his fists taped up, and he stands face-to-face with Ray. Ray asks how his knee is. Look at you. You got your fists taped up. You’re raring to go, aren’t ya? You can’t wait to hit the big boot and drop the big leg, huh? It ain’t gonna happen. You can walk down that ramp and step in this ring and try to fool the fans, but you will never fool him. As Ray looks into your eyes, he sees one thing and one thing only: pure fear. Hulk Hogan fears Bully Ray. You know why, Hulk? Because Ray reminds you of you. Ray is the last of a dying breed-your breed. Did you ever think Ray would be standing here? He’s Bull Ray. He’s the president of A and E. He’s the World Champion. He’s your son-in-law. He’s the guy that’s going to put an end to Hulkamania. Hulk finally talks and says Hulkamania will never die, brother. Ray turns his hat backwards and spits in Hulk’s face. Hulk starts ripping his shirt off, showing his physique that is approximately 812 years old. The two then point at each other, and Ray goes for a punch. Hulk blocks it, hits a couple and goes for a clothesline, but Ray bails to the outside. The rest of A and E come out and surround the ring. They start to climb in the ring when the lights go out. When they come back on, surprise surprise, Sting is in the ring, and he’s pointing his bat at Hulk. Ray is egging him on, so Sting begins pointing his bat at Ray. He knocks Ray’s hat off, then proceeds to take everyone out with his bat. Sting then points at Hulk with the bat again before walking away.

End of show.

As always, feel free to follow me on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/xdustineflx ,and if you like Married…With Children, you can follow my Al Bundy parody account at http://www.twitter.com/bundyisms. Also follow my personal blog at http://nerdslikeme.blogspot.com (feedback is welcome). Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out my mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:

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TNA Impact Wrestling Results and April 18 Recap

April 20, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week, TNA is once again in Corpus Christi, TX. The X-Division title will be on the line, and AJ Styles makes his in-ring return against James Storm.

We see Devon approach Tomax and Xamot somewhere in the back. He asks if they know what’s at stake tonight. Wes Brisco says he can beat Kurt Angle again. Garett Bischoff agrees. Devon doesn’t care what they say; he just wants them to get the job done.

MATCH 1-2-on-1 Handicap Match: Garett Bischoff and Wes Brisco vs. Kurt Angle
Apparently, the gang sign for Aces and Eights is the same as the Van Buren Boys. Now TNA has resorted to ripping off sitcoms. Wes starts off for his team, and Angle applies a waistlock before firing off some rights in the corner. He corner whips Wes, and Wes crashes to the mat. Angle then knocks Garett off the apron. Stomps in the corner on Wes, and Angle follows up with a suplex. He throws Wes to his own corner, where Garett tags himself in. Garett charges in and gets hit with a hip toss. Angle hits various strikes before stomping Garett to the mat, then picks him up and hits a back elbow. Wes comes in and gets hit with a back body drop. Commercials.

Back from the break, Angle is in control of Garett in the corner. Wes rolls into the ring and low-blows Angle behind the ref’s back. Garett begins stomping and punching Angle. He picks Angle up for some more punches, then grinds Angle’s face across the top rope. Garett flips off the crowd before hitting a suplex for 1. “You can’t wrestle!” chant starts at Wes tags in. He whips Garett into Angle in the corner, and Garett sends Angle into a clothesline by Wes for 1. Wes hits some punches and a clothesline in the corner, then rolls Angle over for another 1 before applying a rear chinlock. Angle counters with a back suplex. A “USA!” chant breaks out, despite all three of these guys being from the same country. Garett tags in and runs into a pair of clotheslines. Wes gets hit with the same. Overhead belly-to-belly for Wes, and a release German for Garett. Angle hits Wes with the Murder-Suicide. Garett tries to block it by letting Wes grab him, so Angle suplexes them both at the same time. Angle Slam on Garett for 2 as Wes breaks up the pin. Angle sends Wes shoulder-first into the post as D’Lo Brown makes his way to ringside. Angle applies the ankle lock on Wes as Mr. Anderson distracts the referee. D’Lo throws a chain to Garett, and he hits Angle in the back of the head, getting the 3.

WINNERS: Garett Bischoff and Wes Brisco. D’Lo orders Wes to pick Angle up, and he & Garett give Angle a spike powerbomb. Anderson gets on the mic and says this is the way things are going down from now on. Sting left Hogan’s side a few weeks ago and hasn’t been seen since. Jeff Hardy was decimated last week, and now Angle lies in shambles. If you’re not wearing one of these “cuts” tonight, “you in a bad frickin’ way”. One more thing: AJ Styles, they’re rooting for you, buddy.

We get comments from Zema Ion and Petey Williams in regards to their title match up next.

MATCH 2-3-Way Match for the World X-Division Championship: Zema Ion vs. Petey Williams vs. Kenny King (Champion)
King finally has some new music. Of course it’s generic hip-hop, but it’s still an improvement over his old theme.
King attacks the other two at the opening bell and hits Petey with a back elbow. We get our first look from TNA’s “X-Cam”, and I already hate it. You’d think they’d know better than to bring this back after it was partially responsible for killing Chris Candido. Anyway, Petey hits a dropkick to King’s back, and Ion comes off the top with a seated missile dropkick on Petey. Petey goes to the corner, and King stops Ion charging with a jumping roundhouse. King goes for the Royal Flush on Ion, but Petey yanks Ion off King’s shoulders. King hits a spinning Ghetto Blaster on Ion before going for the Flush on Petey. Petey counters it and hits the Canadian Destroyer, but only gets 2 when Ion breaks up the pin. Ion goes for the pin, but Petey breaks that up. Petey attacks Ion with rights before hitting a spinning headscissors. Ion sets Petey up in the corner, where Petey hits a hurricanrana for 2. Ion hotshots Petey into the ropes before hitting a jumping neckbreaker for 2. The fans are not into this match at all. Petey hits some knife-edge chops before Ion blocks an Irish whip and counters into a modified half-Boston crab. Petey gets a rope break, and now the two trade punches. Petey dominates, ducks a clotheslines and turns a headscissors into a side-Russian legsweep and then into a crucifix for 2. Petey hits a hoisted complete shot for another 2 as King is trying to get back in the ring. Petey calls for the Destroyer again, but Ion counters with a jawbreaker. Petey ducks a clothesline and hits a suicide dive on King. Ion charges in, but Petey shoulders him and hits an outside-in release German suplex before hitting an inside-out hurricanrana on King. Ion hotshots Petey before hitting the outside-in tornado DDT for 2. Ion drags Petey to the corner and goes for the running Asai moonsault. Petey blocks with his knees and goes for the Destroyer, but Ion counters into a roll-up for 2. Petey counters into a scorpion deathlock as King comes in. He hits Petey with a running dropkick, then covers Ion for 3.

WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Kenny King. Decent match, but King did mostly nothing the entire match, which is why I hate this style of match. One guy is always on the floor.

AI stops Magnus in the back, who has a TV title match tonight. Magnus says there’s history, but he’s confused about this situation. A and E are talking about creating so much chaos, but what they don’t realize is that tonight, Magnus is the one who is doing the taking, as he’s taking the title he’s been waiting five months for.

We see Brooke Hogan and Christy Hemme in the back talking about the new KO website. Apparently, Christy is running the site. And I should care why? Brooke calls Mickey James and Miss Tessmacher into the room. She tells them they’re both special and that’s why they’ve been chosen for their match later tonight. James leaves after a minute, and Tessy stays behind to talk to Brooke about Bully Ray, saying all of the Knockouts are there for her.

MATCH 3-World Television Championship: Devon (Champion) vs. Magnus
Wow. We get our first TV title match in what, six months?
Before the match, Knux and DOC try to attack Magnus on the stage, but he fights them both off. Devon then runs up and nails Magnus with a chain. DOC and Knux hold Magnus up and Devon hits him in the gut with the chain. Magnus tries to fight back, but gets hit with a double chokeslam on the ramp.

WINNER: No match, which means that the title will remain un-defended for the next six months or so. As A and E continue the attack, Samoa Joe comes out on stage and gets between them and Magnus. Just get rid of the title already, TNA, as it’s obvious you know how meaningless it truly is.

Samoa Joe is screaming at the camera in the back, calling all of A and E cowards. You come out and claim to be the best and put titles on the line, but then you pull that. It’s okay, Devon. He’s told the “powers-that-be” what he wants, and he’s got it. See you in the ring.

We get a video from a couple of weeks ago where Velvet Sky supposedly injured her knee.

MATCH 3-Winner becomes the new #1 Contender for the Knockouts Championship: Miss Tessmacher vs. Mickie James
ODB is once again the referee. Lock-up to start, and Tessy backs James into the corner before giving a clean break. Another lock-up, and now James backs Tessy into the corner, and another clean break. ODB calling both of these women “bitch” is pretty funny. Another lock-up, and James turns it into an armdrag. Tessy hangs on, and they go back into the lock-up. Tessy now armdrags James, who also holds on. It turns into another lock-up and James finally breaks it with the ropes. ODB grabs the arms of both women and tells them to fights. Tessy takes James and schoolgirls her for 2. James comes back with an arm wringer, then botches the piss out of a rolling jujigatame, which Tessy immediately breaks with the ropes before rolling to the floor. She drags James to the floor, where they trade forearm shots before grabbing each other by the hair. ODB breaks it up and tells them both to get back in the ring. Back in, Tessy ducks a clothesline, kicks James in the knee, then knocks her down with some punches. James sends Tessy into the corner, but Tessy ducks a charge and kicks her in the gut before hitting a Mug Shot for 2. In the adjacent corner, Tessy hits a running clotheslines, then hits a Stinkface. She whips James onto the mat for 2, then goes for another cover, getting another 2. James blocks a throw to the corner, then does a pair of them herself before hitting a flapjack. Up top, James hits a Thesz Press for 2. Mounted punches by James until ODB pulls her off. James turns around, and the two simultaneously clothesline each other. ODB begins the standing 10-count, and they manage to make it up at 8, taking turns slamming each other’s face into the mat. We then get full-screen replays mid-match. Genius. Tessy goes for Tessticular Cancer, but James blocks it and sends Tessy into the corner. She goes for the standing Tornado DDT and Tessy counters that into a sunset flip. James just sits down on Tessy and gets the 3.

WINNER AND NEW #1 CONTENDER: Mickie James.

We see AJ Styles in the back, and Bad Influence is hanging out in the background, with Christopher Daniels holding a t-shirt. As AJ walks off, Daniels says “the band is back together”. They then start singing “The Best Friends Song” from The Hangover.

Elsewhere, Joseph Park is on the phone. Devon approaches him and grabs the phone before telling him to stay out of family business. Park says he’s doing this for Brooke, and Bully Ray nails him from behind. He says he’s her husband and knows what’s best for Brooke. Ray says consider this a threat and not a promise: stay out of our family business. Devon then takes him into the bathroom and slams him into the shower wall before turning the water on him.

We now get a video package for Mickie James, talking about winning the belt back. God, I hate her voice.

James Storm is in the locker room, talking about trying to talk to AJ Styles. Now, it’s time to just kick the crap out of each other.

Bad Influence make their way out into the arena, ,and Daniels has the shirt he was holding tucked into his pants. Apparently, it’s just one of their shirts, but in a different color. Daniels says the year of Bad Influence continues. It is great to be them. The fans love them. They’ve got these sweet new shirts. The BI movie is in-production, and Morgan Freeman is in talks to play the role of Dixie Carter. But, the cherry on the sundae that is their lives, is they are THIS CLOSE to convincing AJ Styles to side with them. Kaz says they got him his own BI shirt in black and yellow. Now, their first matter of business involves their old amigos, “Churro Guerrero” and “Juan Hernandez”. As soon as you muchachos give them their title match, they will become World Tag Team Champions of the World, Part Tres. Now, you all have permission to worship them.

Bobby Roode and Austin Aries come out, and Roode says that he has to be the bearer of bad news. He’s sorry to say it, but BI aren’t the #1 contenders for the titles. Last week, Chavo and Hernandez fluked a victory over him and Aries, so before anything else happens, the former champs get a rematch. Daniels says Roode’s opinion would matter more if he wasn’t a Canadian. Aries says that, lucky for them, his opinion is more valuable than anything, and it comes down to this: BI have been a more successful team than they have. And maybe if he and Roode were “closer” to each other like BI, maybe they’d be a more “well-oiled” machine like a BI. Kaz makes fun of Aries for being a vegan, so Aries makes a joke about Kaz putting meat in his mouth. The four of them then scream incoherently at each other as Chavo and Hernandez enter the ring behind Aries and Roode. BI sees them and bails. As Roode and Aries turn around, they’re attacked by the champs and thrown to the floor. Chavo holds up a belt and says THIS is why they’re better. And…well, that’s it. That was literally Chavo’s whole promo.

Overly long video packages for Aces and Eights about how dangerous they are. This segues into a recap of Angle losing earlier tonight, and then it’s footage of Magnus getting attacked. As someone on FB once said, TNA should change their company motto to “We Are Recaps”.
We see Matt Morgan watching all of this, and it turns into a long promo about how stupid Hulk Hogan is. I’d recap it, but honestly, if you’ve heard Morgan do this promo once, you’ve heard every Morgan promo since then.

MATCH 4-World Television Championship: Devon (Champion) vs. Samoa Joe
Let’s see if it actually happens this time. Christy Hemme botched Devon’s intro. Devon attacks Joe as the bell rings, so looks like the match will indeed happen. Joe begins to fight back with some quick lefts before stomping Devon down. Joe hits a running leg lariat and follows upwith a snapmare, a chop to the back, a kick to the chest and a jumping knee drop for 2. Joe calls for the Kokina Clutch, and Devon counters out before hitting a spear. He chokes Joe over the bottom rope, but Joe gets back up and hits some rights. Devon rakes the eyes, then steps on Joe’s stomach in the corner. Snapmare by Devon, and an elbow drop gets 2. Devon applies a rear chinlock, and Joe fights out. Devon hits a right and corner whips Joe, but Joe counters, hits a running hip bump and a spin kick to the head. Joe sets Devon on the top rope as Garett and Wes comes to ringside. Joe takes them both out and goes for the Muscle Buster, but they get on the apron and distract the ref. As Joe goes for the move, Anderson runs into the ring and hits Joe with a pair of brass knuckles. Devon falls on Joe and gets the 3.

WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Devon. Devon props Joe on his knees after the match. Anderson puts the knuckles back on, gets on his knees and nails Joe in the face.

Next week, Mickie James gets her KO title match, and Roode/Aries vs. Chavo/Hernandez in a championship rematch from last week.

MATCH 5: James Storm vs. AJ Styles
AJ starts to bail on the match before the bell rings, but Storm attacks him from behind. He goes for a suplex on the ramp, but AJ blocks it. Storm goes for a powerbomb, but AJ escapes and hits Storm with a right. Storm comes back with an uppercut, and the match officially starts in the ring. AJ beats Storm down in the corner, then hits some elbows to the back of the head. AJ ducks a clothesline, but runs into a high knee. Storm hits some mounted punches before applying a side headlock. AJ comes back with a chopblock and a clothesline. Commercials.

Back from the break, AJ hits a vertical suplex on Storm before applying a rear chinlock. Storm eventually fights out, and now the two trade punches. Storm hits a forearm off the ropes, an inverted atomic drop and a clothesline. Back body drop off the ropes connects, and the old Eye of the Storm gets 2 (I say “old” because he uses that name for a different move now). Storm props AJ on the top rope and goes for a superplex, but AJ slides out and crotches Storm. Storm gets hung up in the Tree of Woe in the process, and AJ hits a running seated dropkick to Storm’s face for 2. Bad Influence come out on the ramp, cheering AJ on. AJ picks Storm up in a fireman’s carry, but Storm escapes, ducks a clothesline and hits a backcracker before sending AJ to the floor with a clothesline. Storm follows out, and AJ rams him into the apron before throwing him into the guardrail. Back in the ring, AJ misses a running boot and gets hit with Closing Time. Storm calls for the Last Call, but AJ blocks it and rolls through into a heel hook. Storm taps out.

WINNER: AJ Styles. Bad Influence enter the ring to congratulate AJ, who then attacks both of them. He stares at Storm and leaves the ring as A and E attack Storm from behind. BI roll back into the ring, and they get attacked as well. Kaz gets hit with the World title by Bully Ray, and Daniels is hit with a double chokeslam by Knux and DOC as Storm gets hit with a Sky-High by D’Lo. Ray gets on the mic and asks if we know who he is or who they are. They are the Aces and Eights. They are the men responsible for destroying all of your heroes. He is the man responsible for defeating and taking out Jeff Hardy. His brothers are the men responsible for taking out these three pieces of trash. You have no heroes left. Look around. All of your heroes are now just victims, and there’s one man you can blame this on: you can blame this on Hulk Hogan. Hulk is the reason why “all of your heroes are just another victim”. Dad: next week, live on Impact, Ray is calling you out in the middle of this ring. He wants to stare deep into your soul and tell you to your face you are the reason why all of their heroes are nothing but victims of Aces and Eights. And when you ride with the Aces and Eights, you never walk alone. Well, I would certainly hope not, since riding is an entirely different activity than walking.

End of show.

As always, feel free to follow me on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/xdustineflx ,and if you like Married…With Children, you can follow my Al Bundy parody account at http://www.twitter.com/bundyisms. Also follow my personal blog at http://nerdslikeme.blogspot.com (feedback is welcome). Oh, and if you like bodybuilding, check out my mom’s official site by clicking the banner below:

Gerri Davis Banner, NPC National Level Heavyweight and Masters Female Bodybuilder

Thanks for reading, and as long as Spike TV still fronts the bill, I’ll see you next week.

WWE: WrestleMania 29 DVD

WWE: For All Mankind- The Life and Career of Mick Foley- with Mr. Socko Sock Puppet (Limited Edition)

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TNA Impact Wrestling Results and April 11 Recap

April 14, 2013 By: Category: WWE | Pro Wrestling

This week’s TNA Impact opens with Jeff Hardy entering the building. Hulk Hogan stops him in the backstage area and asks if he’s ready for tonight. Hardy says he was born ready for this kind of match.

TNA now has credits for their opening video. Kill me.

Full Metal Mayhem happens tonight, as does Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell, and we will also get AJ Styles’ “big decision”. Now, to the ring for the opening match.

MATCH 1-Best-of-3-Falls Match for the World Tag Team Championship (If the challengers lose, they must split): Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez vs. Austin Aries and Hernandez (Champions)
The challengers are led to the ring by some boxing legend. I don’t pay attention to boxing, so I don’t know who he is, nor do I care. Roode and Aries attack before they even make their official entrance, with Roode throwing Hernandez into the steps several times. The bell rings, and in the ring, Roode sends Aries into Chavo for a corner dropkick. Aries then sends Chavo into Roode for the spinebuster, which gets 3.

Aries tags in after the rest period and goes up top, mocking Chavo. He takes too long, though, and misses the frog splash. Chavo gets in a quick Oklahoma roll for 3, tying up the series. We’re now into the third fall, and Hernandez is still laid out on the floor. Roode tags in and stomps Chavo down in the opposite corner before dragging him to his own for more stomps and a foot choke. Aries chokes Chavo over the bottom rope behind the ref’s back, and Roode hits a quick back suplex for 2. Aries tags in and hits a tope con hilo, then stomps the face and hits a fist drop for 2. Roode back in, and he corner whips Chavo. Chavo blocks the charge and goes for a tornado DDT. Roode blocks that, but gets hit with a dropkick. Chavo looks for a tag, but Hernandez isn’t there. He eventually crawls up and tags in, hitting a slingshot shoulderblock on Roode, who has tagged in as well. He takes out both champs before hitting Roode with a Pounce. Warrior Press on Aries, and now Hernandez goes outside to the ramp for an outside-in Air Mexico on both the champs. Commercials.

Back from the break, Aries hits a double axe handle from the top to the floor on Hernandez. Roode throws Hernandez back in and goes for the pin, getting 2. A rear chinlock is applied now, and Roode turns it into a snapmare. Aries tags in and hits a spinning European uppercut from the middle rope to the back of Hernandez’s head for 2. Roode back in as Hernandez tries to fight back from his knees. Roode drops him with a forearm, then nails Chavo on the apron, knocking him to the floor. Hernandez tries to fight back once more, so Roode rakes the eyes. Aries comes in illegally, and Hernandez blocks a double clothesline before hitting one of his own. Chavo tags in, and he hits a tope con hilo on Roode before knocking Aries to the floor. Spinning headscissors on Roode sends him out as well, and Chavo drops them both with a slingshot cross-body. Back in, Chavo gets 2, but Aries breaks the pin. He goes for the brainbuster, and Chavo counters into the 3 Amigos. He hits 2 before Roode breaks it up, and Chavo hits him with the 3 Amigos. Up top, Chavo goes for the frog splash. Aries pushes him off onto the ropes, and Roode gets 2 with a handful of tights. Roode applies the Bowflex, and Hernandez breaks the hold up. Aries sends Hernandez to the ramp, but he lands on his feet and hits another outside-in Air Mexico. However, the champs move, and Hernandez hits Chavo. Aries sends him to the floor, and Roode gets 2 on Chavo. Roode sends Aries in for another corner dropkick before Chavo counters a spinebuster by Roode into a DDT for 2. Aries breaks up the pin and sets Chavo up on the top rope. Hernandez comes in and grabs Aries in the Border Toss, but Roode boots him in the gut, preventing the move. The champs go for a double suplex, but Hernandez counters into his own. Chavo up top now, and he hits a frog splash on Roode for the 3.

WINNERS AND NEW CHAMPIONS: Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez. Taz just said Texas is the only state that has their own flag. Jesus tap-dancing Christ…

In the back Brooke Hogan is stopped by Joey Ryan. He says she doesn’t have to apologize for how the knockouts acted last week. He has his ref gear again tonight and volunteers to do the job again. Brooke says he doesn’t have to worry about it. Ryan embarrassed her last week, and this week, he has a match, and we’ll see who the “bigger man” is.

Outside, Aces and Eights have arrived on their motorcycles and are just hugging each other repeatedly.

Joseph Park makes his way into the arena. He has asked for a few minutes to discuss a few points of business. His main issue is with A and E, and Bully Ray specifically. What Ray and his band of hooligans has perpetrated on TNA is felonious, and it stops now. The crowd has completely turned on Park in just a few seconds. Park wants justice, and tonight, it will be served when Jeff Hardy brings the title back to TNA. Justice doesn’t end there, though. Park is well-versed in divorce law and marital code in this country. He holds up a piece of paper and says he’s written up annulment papers that will officially end the marriage between Brooke and Ray. Before he can finish, Devon enters the ring and rips the mic out of Park’s hand before ripping up the papers. Devon says that, if Park has a problem with his brother, he’s got a problem with Devon. Go back to the rock you crawled out from, and stay out of family business. He doesn’t give a damn what Park thinks; stay out of the family business. You’ve been warned. Devon leaves as Park is picking up the shreds of paper, then gets back in the ring with a chain around his fist and decks Park in the gut.

MATCH 2: Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell
At least Taryn decided to invest in a pair of kneepads. I don’t know why, but wrestlers not wearing kneepads really, really bothers me. It just looks strange, not to mention it’s kind of stupid when you consider how much damage is done to the knees in this profession. Before the match begins, ODB is announced as the referee. Kim immediately gets in ODB’s face, and Taryn snaps her into the ring. Clothesline by Taryn, followed by a suplex. Monkey flip out of the corner, but Kim counters the spear. Taryn puts on the breaks and mounts the middle rope, so Kim trips her. In the corner, Kim strikes Taryn several times. Taryn tries to fight back from her knees. She ducks a clothesline, but gets hit with a back elbow. Kim picks her up for a fireaman’s carry, then drops her face-first on the mat. Kim foot-chokes Taryn over the middle rope, then gets in ODB’s face. Taryn reverses a corner whip, but Kim counters the charge into a roll-up with a handful of tights. ODB counts 2, but sees the cheating and breaks it. Taryn quickly schoolgirls Kim and gets 3.

WINNER: Taryn Terrell. Todd Kenely called this a “PPV quality match”, further establishing his lack of credibility. Kim continues to yell at ODB after the match, so ODB chases her to the back. Christy Hemme stops Taryn for an interview after the match. She says she has waited a long time to get physical with Gail Kim, but now, who wants to get physical with Taryn?

We see Adam Pearce and Magno in the back, ready for Gut Check. I already know how this part turns out, and it’s total bullsh*t.

Pre-recorded footage of Al Snow, Bruce Prichard and Danny Davis talking about Gut Check is aired, and they focus on Magno botching spots, as well as Pearce cheating to win the match. Davis calls Pearce “technically sound”, and he appreciates that, as does Snow. They question Pearce’s personality, as they haven’t heard him talk yet.

Back to the arena, the judges are with Pearce and Magno. Prichard talks about the hype for these two, and only one of them can go to the ring to face Gut Check tonight. Magno, you have your entire career ahead of you. Adam, you are a 17-year veteran, and that can be viewed either negatively or positively. Decision time: Magno, your decision will be made in the ring later tonight. Adam Pearce walks off, and you can hear the crowd booing in the background. As I said, pure bullsh*t.

AI stops Hulk Hogan in the back to ask about Bully Ray. He says it’s important for TNA to get the belt back, but right, it’s time to deal with AJ Styles. AI asks about Sting, and Hulk doesn’t have an answer.

Other AI stops AJ Styles outside to ask about A and E. He shoves the camera away. Mr. Anderson stops him and hands him another vest.

Hulk Hogan makes his way into the arena, and he’s here to get a decision from AJ Styles. There’s a lot of things going on tonight, but the man he needs to talk to is a man that needs to get out here right now. AJ Styles, you need to get out here and let him know what’s going on right now. AJ makes his way out, the vest still in his hand. Hulk says they’re in the middle of a crazy war. AJ is playing the middle, so he needs to know which side AJ is on. This is an ultimatum, brother. AJ says he doesn’t respond well to ultimatums. Once again, James Storm interrupts the proceedings. He’s not out here to give AJ an ultimatum or hear what side he’s on. But, what he is out here for is because he and AJ are going to fight. Bad Influence then joins the fray. Kaz tells “Toby Keith” to step aside, as this doesn’t concern him. They’re not out here to fight; they’re out here to men fences. They also see through all the poop happening in the ring. They’re sexual and intellectual, so they know what’s going on. “Thunderlips” is going to try to get AJ on his team since A and E has dismantled his team. A and E, at the same time, wants to recruit TNA’s best soldier for the last 11 years. Daniels tells AJ that both sides will use him up and spit him out. BI has another proposition: they want AJ on their side. They know AJ thinks the whole thing with Claire Lynch was bad, but wasn’t it worse when Dixie Carter, Hulk and the fans all turned their backs on AJ? Don’t stand with either of these strangers; come stand with your brothers. Think of all the titles of they’ve won together. Wouldn’t it be great if the three of them stood together and it was them against the world? Storm shoves AJ to get his attention, then begins screaming in his face. AJ once again walks away from Storm. He stares at BI for a minute, then walks past them as well. Hulk yells at him and tells him that, since he won’t make a decision, Hulk will. Next week, AJ will fight Storm.

Joey Ryan is on his way to the ring for a match.

In the locker room, Kurt Angle is saying the feud between A and E and TNA has only begun, and the balance of power switches when Hardy wins the title. Next week, Angle has asked Hulk for a handicap match against Tomax and Xamot, and he plans to show them he is the baddest SOB in pro wrestling.

MATCH 3: Joey Ryan vs. Rob Terry
Remember that tag team Ryan had with Matt Morgan? Neither does TNA. Ryan runs into a shoulder as Mike Tenay tries to make the claim that Terry outweighs Ryan by 100 pounds. Terry hits another shoulder, and Ryan rolls to the apron. Terry pulls him back in and beals him across the ring. Terry hits an open-hand chop in the corner, then does the same in the adjacent corner. Same thing in the third corner, and Terry caps off the chops with a hard corner whip. Bodyslam by Terry, followed by a corner clothesline. Terry hits an over-the-shoulder powerslam, then picks Ryan up on his shoulders, turning the fireman’s carry into the Freakbuster for 3.

WINNER: Rob Terry. At least Terry didn’t botch his finisher this week. Terry is doing a guest appearance at a local show here this month. Guess where I won’t be that night?

Brooke and Hulk are in the back, and Hulk says he has a suite here tonight, and he wants Brooke with him there to watch the main event. Brooke says she wants to be at ringside for that match so she can see Hardy win the title up-close. As Hulk and Brooke part ways, Matt Morgan stops Hulk and asks if this is what things have come down to for Hulk. He should have done the right thing and named Morgan the #1 contender at Lockdown. Bully Ray wouldn’t be champion, and Hulk wouldn’t be responsible for breaking Brooke’s heart. Instead, he did what he does best, and make another Hulk Hogan mistake. One day, all of these mistakes will come crashing down on him.

It’s Gut Check time. JB introduces the three judges, followed by Magno. Despite being from Texas, the crowd immediately turns on Magno once he’s introduced. Good. He doesn’t deserve any accolades after last week’s performance. Danny Davis is up first as the crowd chants “No!” He says the fans here have made a decision, but he hasn’t yet. If Magno was in OVW, Davis would make him a star. Unfortunately, they’re on Impact, which is nationwide, and he has to agree with the fans. His answer is no. Magno gets his 30 seconds now to convince the other two judges he deserves it, and he says there are a lot of goals in life. He’s been in work all around the world, but that’s not enough for him. All the people know him. But he wants the whole world to know him as Magno, Impact luchador. That was the English half of the promo. I don’t speak Spanish, so I don’t know what else he said. However, what he said in English was complete garbage, and the fans in the building let him know it as well. Bruce Prichard is up next. He tells Magno he’s here because he has his entire career ahead of him. He has the physical attributes and a marketable look. However, his experience in the ring could cost him. He doesn’t know who Magno is and he needs more seasoning, and his answer is in both English and Spanish: no. Good. Magno flat-out sucks.

Outside, A and E are having a party with their motorcycles. Anderson asks Bully Ray if he’s ready, then gives him the group’s catchphrase. Ray says he needs to walk alone tonight. He needs to beat Hardy alone so he can shove it up Hardy and Hogan’s asses. He asks A and E to swear they will let him do this alone tonight. He’s not doing this just for him; he’s doing it for all of them. He then asks Anderson to hold his wedding ring.

The main event is up next.

MATCH 4-Full Metal Mayhem for the World Championship: Jeff Hardy vs. Bully Ray (Champion)
We see Brooke sitting in the front row. Ray walks over to her and tells her he’s glad she could make it before blowing her a kiss. Hardy immediately hits a sit-out Twist of Fate, then follows up with an avalanche in the corner and some punches. Hard corner whip by Hardy, and he grabs a chair, striking Ray over the back twice. Hardy brings a ladder in and props it in the corner, where he sends Ray in face-first. Hardy sets the chair up and hits Poetry in Motion. Ray falls down, lands face-first on the chair, and the ladder falls across his back. Hardy sets the ladder up in the middle, but Ray tips the ladder over. Hardy lands on his feet and hits a reverse enziguri. He goes to clothesline Ray over the top rope, but Ray counters with a back body drop, sending Hardy back-first on the ramp. Ray grabs his chain and begins whipping Hardy on the ramp. He goes back into the ring and sets up the ladder before throwing a chair to the corner. Ray begins climbing, but Hardy recovers and climbs as well, hitting Ray with some punches. Ray punches back, then rakes the eyes. He goes for a suplex, eventually hitting it. Commercials.

Back from the break, Hardy is on a table in the middle as Ray is on the middle rope. Hardy slides off, grabs a chair and cracks Ray with it. He moves the table, then sets a ladder against it upside-down. Hardy goes for a superplex, but Ray blocks it and knocks Hardy back down. Hardy catches a boot and goes for a Twist, but Ray blocks it as the ladder falls. He knocks Hardy down and sets the ladder back in place, hitting a gourdbuster across the supports of the ladder. Ray throws a chair to the floor in front of Brooke, then throws the broken ladder to the floor. He grabs another chair and strikes Hardy in the leg. The table is set up on the side of the ring closest to the ramp, and Ray then goes outside for another ladder, throwing it in the ring. The ladder is propped in the corner next to the table, and Ray then tells Brooke he will slap her in the face after he wins the belt. Hardy gets back up and hits some rights, followed by a flying forearm, an inverted atomic drop, a double legdrop and a seated dropkick. He throws a chair at Ray, and Ray catches it, so Hardy grabs another chair and hits the chair into Ray’s face, knocking him to the floor. Hardy goes for a plancha, but Ray moves, and Hardy crashes into the guardrail. Brooke and Ray scream at each other once more, with Ray calling her “stupid”. He slams Hardy into the steps, then it’s time for more screaming. He asks for a kiss and sticks his tongue out, so Brooke slaps him. Hardy grabs Ray and slams him into the steps. He sets Ray on the table, but the table breaks in half. Hardy hits a quick legdrop and begins looking for another table. The closest one is all the way up on the stage. Good planning here. Hardy brings the table back to rinside. Ray attacks Hardy before moving the broken table. Hardy comes back with another sit-out Twist and sets Ray on the good table. Hardy goes into the ring and climbs to the top rope, hitting a swanton bomb through the table on the floor. Hardy rolls back in the ring and moves the table that is still in the ring. He sets up the good ladder as Taz hands Ray the hammer for the ring bell. Ray brings it back in the ring as Hardy is climbing the ladder. He climbs up as well, and the two trade punches. Hardy grabs the belt, and Ray smacks him in the face with the hammer, sending Hardy off the ladder and through the table before grabbing the belt.

WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Bully Ray. A and E come through the crowd to celebrate the victory. Ray yells for the music to be shut off as we see a replay of what just happened. He asks if everyone knows who he is, or who A and E are. They are the Aces and Eights. He is the World Heavyweight Champion and when you ride with the Aces and Eights, you never walk alone.

End of show.

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